Chapter Nine

Ma had a crib, but one of her boarders was using it, so Kitty fixed up a bed for Maddy in the bottom bureau drawer. Doc had done something similar in his office once; the time triplets were born, and shortly after orphaned, in Dodge. As she tucked Maddy into the makeshift bed, she smiled at what had been a bittersweet moment for her at the time. Matt had stopped by while she was taking care of two of the babies in Doc's outer room. She had been so busy that, in order to prepare another bottle, she had handed him the one in her arms without even thinking about it. Consequently, she had been caught off guard when she turned around. Her heart turned over at the sight of Matt looking intently at the tiny boy he held securely in his hands. Until that moment, she thought she had made peace with the knowledge that she and Matt would likely never have a family. It was a painful reminder of what could have been. And it had come to be, after all, Kitty realized, gazing lovingly at the child she had never thought she could have.

She was still lost in thought when Matt came back and didn't hear him until he opened the door. Seeing Kitty kneeling next to their sleeping daughter he said softly, "Ma's getting some supper ready for us." She smiled at him as he helped her up. "You all right?" he asked as his arms went around her.

She rested her head on his chest, nodding. "You know, I can't help wondering where that money came from. If he didn't come by it honestly, it doesn't seem right to take it, but I guess maybe we'll never know who to give it back to."

"Maybe this will put your mind at rest. Let's sit down." Instead of the chairs, they sat on the edge of the bed. Matt reached into his vest pocket and took out the telegram, which he handed her, and the letter and package, which he placed on the bedside table. "That's all Newly has been able to find out so far."

Kitty read the message over and looked up at him in surprise. "There really was a freight business?"

"Looks that way."

She read the telegram over a second time to make sure she hadn't missed anything. A Captain Desjardins of the New Orleans Police Department reported Wayne Russell had no outstanding warrants or any known complaints against him. A month earlier he had sold his freight company telling the buyer he planned an extended trip out west. There was no other information. "This still leaves so many unanswered questions, Matt," she sighed, folding the paper and handing it back to him. He laid it, too, on the table. "You plan on telling me what those are?" she asked him again, indicating the package and letter.

"Your father left them with Mr. Bodkin. You ready to open them now, or should we eat first?"

Kitty pondered that question. Whatever they revealed might raise more questions than they answered. "Let's eat now. Then we can talk about whatever it is when we go to bed."

Matt nodded. "All right." After another brief check on Maddy they walked arm in arm to Ma Smalley's kitchen.

Ma dished up large servings of stew for them both and set a plate of sliced bread and a small dish of butter on the table. After telling Kitty not to even think of clearing up afterwards, she'd come back to do it later, she gave them their privacy and went off to her bedroom to do some mending. They ate mostly in silence, occasionally trading news they'd overheard in town that evening. They avoided any mention of the money or what they might do with the amount left after the mortgage was paid, both preferring to wait and see if it actually arrived before even considering it theirs. When they finished, Kitty stacked the dishes next to the sink, put the food away, and they went back to their room.

Kitty sat on the edge of the bed again, holding the package while Matt undressed. Based on its flat, rectangular shape she had a pretty good idea of what it was. When Matt sat next to her, she slipped off the string that was wrapped around it and carefully unfolded the paper. It was another photograph, larger than her baby picture and enclosed in a cardboard folder. With an anxious glance at Matt, she opened the folder and gasped softly. She raised a trembling hand to cover her mouth and handed the picture to Matt. It was a hand-colored picture of a young woman, standing next to the same chair as the one in Kitty's picture. It was too faded to tell the color of her eyes, but her hair was light brown, nearly blonde. She wore a deep green dress and a hat that looked like it had been quite stylish in its day. The faint smile on her face was familiar; it was the same one he had seen nearly every day of the last twenty years. There was no need to ask who it was. He put his arm around Kitty and pulled her closer. "Honey," he said gently, "this is your mother, isn't it?"

"Yes," she whispered, nodding. Her shoulders began to shake and the tears she'd been working so hard to hold back since the day before burst forth. As always, Matt felt helpless when she cried, unable to do anything more than hold her, stroking her back and her hair until it passed. But it was enough. When she finished he dried her eyes with the sleeve of his undershirt, which brought a brief smile to her face. She picked up the picture again, studying it for a few moments. "Oh, Matt. It must be close to twenty five years since I've been able to remember what my mother looked like. I was still a kid when I left New Orleans, and the more time that passed, and the more things that happened, the harder it was to remember. I think maybe I was afraid to remember." He looked down at her with a puzzled expression, but said nothing. "I didn't want her to know I was-what I did...to make a living." Kitty shuddered, but managed to continue without crying. "I guess I thought if I could see her face, I'd be able to see how disappointed she was in me."

Matt pulled her tighter against him. "Kitty, you know better than that." She shook her head, not looking at him. "Yes, you do. Remember what you told me about your mother when we found out your father was coming to Dodge the last time?"

"No."

"You said she never held it against your father for deserting her. She accepted it as the way he was. Sounds a lot like someone I know. Someone who accepted me the way I am." Kitty looked up at him without smiling.

"You never deserted me."

"Didn't I? I put you second for a long time, honey. My point is, don't you think she'd feel the same about you? I think she'd understand."

"Maybe." Kitty shrugged, still not convinced.

"She would, and not only that, she'd be proud of you for everything you've accomplished since then. She'd be proud of who you are today."

"How do you know?"

"Because I know her daughter and what kind of mother she is." He turned her in his arms and bent his head down to give her a slow, gentle kiss. "Now, I think we should get some sleep."

Kitty pulled back the covers while Matt turned the lamp down low. They settled in together and Matt wrapped his arms around her. Kitty was still holding the picture of her mother and she gave it another long look before handing it to Matt to put on the table. ""You know, that picture means so much more than any amount of money, Matt," she observed. Matt nodded silently and picked up the envelope.

"There's still the letter. You ready to read it?"

"Not just now." Matt reached toward the lamp to turn it the rest of the way down and she stopped him. "Would you read it? You can tell me if there's anything I need to know. I'll read it some other time."

Matt said nothing, but tore open the flap of the envelope and pulled the letter out. Kitty turned away and snuggled her back against him, so she couldn't see his expression while he read. When he finished, he nodded to himself and put out the light. Kitty turned back toward him, saying nothing. After a minute Matt finally spoke.

"It's all right, Kitty. What he had to say will keep until you're ready to read it."

TBC

A/N According to Wikipedia, techniques for hand-coloring daguerreotypes (an early form of photography) were patented in the early 1840's.