A/N: I just want to remind my readers that Bella hasn't had normal human contact in 10 years. So the way she talks and what she calls some things may sound weird to you. As the drugs leave her system some of her human instincts start to come back but with 10 years of abuse and torture its hard for her to understand. Thanks and I hope you enjoy! Reviews keep me going :)

For many darks and lights I refused to talk to anyone. I had too much to process but yet I didn't want to think about anything at all.

Jasper came to talk to me two times a day. "Bella, how are you feeling?" He would ask. When I wouldn't respond or even look at him for several minutes he would sigh and say, "I am here if you have any questions or just want to talk. We are here to help you and there are many people that care about you." Then he would leave.

Carlisle came to see me a lot. I let him do his exams but refused to talk to him. He didn't have to do anymore in between my legs exams, for that I was secretly grateful. I allowed Rosalie to take me to the bathroom. For a while I refused that but I had wet myself a few times. This made me feel embarrassed. When Rosalie realized I wouldn't ask for toilet time she would come in many times during the light hours and once through the darks and take me to the restroom whether I had to go or not.

One time I woke up and it was dark. Emmett had his head on my bed and he was crying. I felt bad, I held his hand. He had been with me almost all of the time. But I did not talk. I didn't eat either. Why would I eat when I wasn't hungry? That is just a waste of food. Wasted food meant burn. Loving time hadn't happened since I had been here but I knew it was coming. They would get sick of me and send me back. I knew it.

I slept and stared out into the windows. I can't say I actually thought of much. I didn't want to. I couldn't remember much but I remembered enough that I knew there were many black spots in my memory. I felt I should know these people but then I remember that I know no one, I am no one. Even though these people kept telling me otherwise. I still didn't believe anything anyone told me but then I dreamt…of Cullen.

I woke with a start, with a pounding in my chest. I looked all around me and Cullen was sitting beside me, usually where Emmett sat.

I must have looked frightened, "Its okay Bella. You are safe. I will go get your brother. I'll be right back." He stood from his chair.

"No."

He stopped, "What?"

"You loved me. In a good way though, not like loving time with 'him'."

"What?"

"You loved me?"

Now it was his time to look frightened, "Umm…Bella…I should go get someone…"

"Answer the question Edward." I had no idea where this confidence was coming from. I wasn't scared of him. I didn't know why but I knew somewhere in mind, that he wouldn't hurt me.

"Yes, I do. I mean, I did. I mean…." He tugged at his hair. "You remember me?"

"Yes."

"What do you remember?"

"I don't know." I lied.

"Bella, please tell me."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"Because he will be mad. Loving time is just for him."

"Bella, he is not going to be able to touch you ever again."

"I can't believe that!"

"Why?!" He screamed back.

"Because he said I was his, only his! I am no one, I know no one! And it's true, it's been 10 years! I don't know anyone anymore! No one will be able to love me the right way again after they find out the truth of what I have done and what has happened to me! The one person that still loved me hasn't come to see me since you brought me here! You should have left me die at that cabin! At least I could be with my Dad who I knew loved me!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I slam my hand to cover my mouth, tears threaten to spill.

Edward walked over to my bed and pulled up his chair, he grabbed my hand in between both of his, careful not to touch the IV. "Bella, what do you know of your Father?"

I tried to control my tears and my breathing, "I know he is dead."

"Who told you?"

"He did." Edward handed me a tissue and I wiped at my cheeks. The traitor tears, damn them.

"How?" he asked.

"He would come to visit me at dark time in the cabin. He told me that he tried to find me sooner. And that he tried to stay alive long enough to see me again but he just couldn't hold on any longer, the cancer was just too much. He would come almost every night, just for a few minutes though. He would tell me he loved me and to hang on just a little while longer because soon I was going to be safe. I knew his love was different than Josephs so it didn't scare me. But ever since I came here I haven't seen him," I sobbed.

"It's because you are safe."

"I want to believe that Edward but I can't…I am just so scared. I feel like this is all a dream. There are so many black spots in my memory…," I paused "Wow."

"What?"

"This is the most conversation I have had in 10 years. When I was at the cabin my head was always so foggy and even here sometimes. I wasn't able to put many words together."

"Bella, you were given a lot of drugs. There was heroin, ecstasy, and a numerous amount of various psychiatric drugs in your system when you came to the hospital."

"Really?"

He nodded, "You have been going through detox while you have been here. Carlisle and Jasper think that is the biggest reason for the memory loss and the bouts of altered mental status. But we are all here to work with you. We all love you, the right way."

"I am so scared, Edward."

"I know, but no one is going to hurt you. I promise. Now, can you tell me what you remember of us?"

"That I was no longer just Alice's annoying little friend." I blushed. This time I knew why.

He smiled, "Yea. You are so much more than Alice's annoying little friend."

I smiled at him, "But we kept it secret didn't we?"

"Yes, at the time only Alice and Emmett knew. I had a black eye for a week when Emmett found out about it. I was 3 years older than you, we didn't want anyone to try to keep us away from each other. The day before you turned 16, was when you were taken. We were going to tell our parents the day after. Age wouldn't have been an issue for us then. They obviously know now, I told them everything," he paused.

My mind was swirling again. As he talked, new memories came to the front of my mind. I had loved this boy once, only he was a man now. He had loved me but he couldn't love me again because I am no one.

"Bella, can you do something for me?" He asked seriously.

"What?" I was nervous.

"Will you please eat something?"

"What?" That was not what I was expecting of him.

"Bella, you have been here for a little over 6 weeks…"

"Really? It's been that long?"

"Yes and if you don't eat soon they are going to force you to eat. And I know you wouldn't want that. No one wants to force you to do anything but when something endangers your life, we will do what we have to. They have been giving you as much supplement through your IV but there is only so much they can do that way. You are extremely underweight…"

"Yes I will try to eat something. I am sorry." I didn't want to but I couldn't stand the look of sadness pouring from Edward's eyes.

The door swings open to my room, "What happened? I was told there was screaming in here!"

It's Carlisle, "Bella are you okay?"

"Yes, I am fine." I answer half honestly. The more I remembered the more confusing and scary everything got.

"Bella here, just agreed to try to eat something." Edward told him.

"Umm…Okay then. I will go order you some broth. Your stomach can't handle solid food right now." I nod. He smiles and I give a weak smile back.

Edward and I don't say anything to each other but he is still holding my hand when Carlisle comes in with a tray. He places it on the rolling table and brings it to my bed. I look at the bowl. It looks unappetizing. Both Edward and Carlisle are watching me carefully as I pick up the spoon and bring it to my lips. My mind is still swirling and black spots are starting to cloud my vision. I try to blink them away but to no avail. I am no one, I know no one. I drop the spoon, I feel the warm liquid seep through the top of my gown.

The black spots grow, "I am sorry. I am no one, the end." And I am done.

Again I can hear but my eyes are closed. They won't open but then again, I am not trying very hard.

"Is it a coma?" Emmett asks.

"No, I think it is a way for her mind to cope." Jasper answers.

"I don't understand. She still moves and her eyes are open sometimes and she blinks, I just don't get it! And then she will sleep for days! Why can't you do something Jasper?" Emmett screams.

"Emmett there isn't much we can do; we have to let her mind heal. At least she is eating a few bites of food once and a while," Jasper concedes.

I am? I don't remember that.

"What did you say to her Edward? This is all your fault! You and your stupid teenage romance, she wasn't ready to know! She can't handle it!" Emmett screamed.

Don't yell at Edward. It's no ones fault but my own. My fault, burn.

"I didn't say anything to her Emmett, she remembered me. She was the one who said it. All I did was answer her questions. I am sorry, I didn't mean for this..."He defended. "You know I love her, you know I wouldn't do anything to hurt her..."

He loves me? No, he can't. I am no one, burn.

"Well you did!"

Emmett, please calm down. I silently beg, I am sorry. Burn.

"You two," Carlisle reprimands, "Enough. None of this is good for Bella. Go get some coffee or something and cool down. If you have more to say to each other, it can be said outside of this room. As Bella's doctor I will not have you two going at each other in front of her. Do you understand?"

I hear feet shuffle and then a door slam. I jump.

"Edward, I think he is just upset because she remembered you before him," I hear Jasper say.

"I didn't mean for it to happen that way, I'm sorry."

"He knows that, he just needs someone to take out his frustration on. Why don't you get some coffee, take a break." Carlisle encourages.

"Alright," I hear Edward answer and he leaves the room.

"Bella, I know you can hear me." Carlisle accuses.

I keep my eyes closed but answer him, "How?"

"I saw you jump when Emmett slammed the door. How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you should send me back to him. Burn, it's what needs to happen." My eyes are still closed.

"Why do you say that?" Jasper asks.

I open my eyes slowly and look at him, "Because I am causing problems for all of you. I can't stand waiting, waiting for the burn to happen! I rather you just do it, so I can get it over with! With him I knew what was going to happen. I knew my purpose, my consequences. You will get sick of me soon and I will be back with him. I just hate not knowing when! I am not Bella, I am no one! That girl 10 years ago is dead! Gone, she is never coming back!"

"Okay Bella. First, no one is going to send you back there. Second, no one is ever going to burn you. You are safe here, no one will intentionally hurt you. I promise. And last, you are Isabella Swan. No one expects you to be the same Bella you were 10 years ago. No one is the same from 10 years ago but you are still Bella. You are strong, smart, and special." Jasper tells me.

I have so many arguments to that statement but I address the one that scares me the most, "If you don't send me back, he will find me anyways. I was his and only his. He told me if I ran he would find me. And loving time would be the worst. He would love me over and over for a long time, until I begged for death!"

"Bella," Jasper said carefully, "Joseph and Barbara will never be able to hurt you again because they are dead."

What? How? Why? What? No, that can't be true.

"You are lying!" Burn, I knew what would probably happen for yelling but I couldn't help it. Burn, oh it will hurt.

"No Bella, when the FBI surrounded the cabin, Joseph killed Barbara and then himself."

"The FBI?" My mind can't take this. Burn, love, burn. No. The FBI? What? Why were they looking for me? No. Cullen found me. Not the FBI. Joseph wasn't dead. He couldn't be. No. Air in, air in, air out. Air in, air in, air in, air out. Beep, beep, beep. No.

"Bella, stay with us. You are okay, you are safe."

Carlisle was talking to me, I could feel his hand on my shoulder. I could see parts of his face, but it was covered in black spots.

"I can't…I don't…No…I'm sorry. No, I can't." Burn.

"Come on, nice easy breathes. You are safe; no one is going to hurt you. Stay with us," Carlisle pleaded calmly.

"I can't…" Air in, air in, air in air out. "The end." I closed my eyes.

Again, I welcomed the darkness. This time I dreamt of irons, burning, and of 'him'. Hell.