Sorry that it has been so long since I updated this story. I lost interest in it for a while but I think I'm going to go back and finish it now.

Jason slowly opened his eyes and instantly regretted it as a blinding bright light flooded through the half open slits. He squeezed them shut tightly and took a deep breath. For a moment he allowed his other senses to take in his surroundings. He heard a steady beeping noise to his right that followed the rhythmic pattern of his heart.

"Jase?" The voice was soft but it grated against Jason ears and made his pounding head ache even more.

"Where am I," he asked after a moment of silence. His voice came out creaky and harsh from lack of use. His throat felt as dry as a desert and it pained him to speak.

"The hospital," said the voice that he now recognized as Kat's. "You had a nasty run in with a robber, remember?"

Jason nodded slightly, realizing that Kat was holding his hand gently in her own, her thumb instinctively rubbing the top of it in a soothing gesture. He pushed past the pain and slowly opened his eyes. The room was bright, too bright. The absurdly white walls seemed to catch every ounce of light and reflect it straight into his burning, watering eyes. He blinked rapidly but the stinging sensation refused to subside.

"Kat," he rasped out. "Can I have some water?"

"Sure." The pretty little Australian stood and walked over to his bedside table. She poured him a small glass of water and tilted his head up so that he could drink it better.

He would have felt like a fool for the water dribbling down his chin if he hadn't been in so much pain, but as it was he didn't really care if she thought he was messy or not. As she removed the glass he lay back and tried to get a feel for what sort of damage had been done to his body. It was then that he realized that he couldn't feel his lower body.

"The doctor will be in shortly to talk to you about…well about where you go from here," she said quietly, pretending to fuss over the water jug in order to avoid meeting his questioning gaze.

Alarms and warning bells immediately went off inside his head at her strange behavior. "What do you mean where I go from here?" He asked quickly.

"Umm…" she brushed a stray strand of hair out of her face and started to rearrange the cards and flowers on a nearby shelf. Since when did Kat have a nervous habit of cleaning?

"Kat," he prodded, "what?"

She sighed and turned to face him, though she still refused to look him directly in the eye. "The doctor said that it is probably temporary, but he doesn't know for sure. Only time will tell." She thought of what the doctor had said that he would never walk again, but she decided to soften the blow. No need to upset him more than was necessary right then.

A sinking sensation that started in his stomach slowly reached his heart. He wasn't sure he wanted to know what his friend was talking about, but as much as he dreaded her answer he knew that he had to ask.

"What's only temporary?"

"The bullet, it did a lot of damage to your back and the nerves and things there. They tried but they couldn't get it out, said that it was too dangerous." She paused. "Jason, you're paralyzed."

"You're kidding right," he said as he started to process her horrifying words. "Kat, please, tell me you're kidding!"

Her voice broke slightly and tears started to fall freely over her rosy cheeks. "I'm so sorry. I wish I could tell you that, but I would be lying."

Jason shook his head, "no, this isn't happening," he said, more to himself than to her.

"I'm sorry Jason," she repeated. "So sorry."

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The first few days back at home were hell on earth. Jason had to have someone staying with him at all times because he was confined to a wheelchair. He was attending physical therapy but he refused to stay at the rehab building because his pride wouldn't let him.

"Do you need anything," asked Kat from the kitchen.

Jason shook his head mutely and continued to stare at the television screen without really seeing it. If Kat had asked he wouldn't have been able to tell her what he was watching, but it didn't really matter anymore anyway, nothing did.

"Hey bro, want some company," asked Tommy as he made himself comfy on Jason's couch.

Jason didn't bother to answer him. It didn't matter if he wanted the company or not, Tommy was there and he wasn't likely to leave any time soon.

"Oh, I love that movie," remarked Tommy with a laugh. "Have you seen the new one they came out with?"

"No," said Jason flatly.

He crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the wall. Maybe if he pretended Tommy wasn't there the man would disappear.

"Well, it's great! I love the part where…"

No such luck. Jason heaved a sigh and unlocked the brakes on his wheelchair. "I'm going to my room," he informed his guests. Over the past few days he had become an expert at navigation the chair around his small apartment, and the fact that his whole living room had been rearranged, while irksome to Jason, helped greatly in his mobility. He maneuvered his way through his bedroom door and let it slam loudly behind him as he rolled over to stare unseeingly out the window. He seemed to be doing a lot of that lately, looking but not really seeing anything.

His current situation sucked and as far as the doctor was concerned he would be stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. It was a dim view of his once bright future and one that Jason could not and would not come to terms with. He had tried. He had tried to live his life as a paralyzed person for three weeks and he was miserable. He couldn't envision spending the rest of his life that way.

The depression that had taken hold of him finally took a dark and terrifying turn as he rolled over to his closet and reached for a box at the back. Slowly he went back to the window, gently caressing the lid of the box and screwing up his courage to do the one thing that he had been thinking of doing for a week. It was the one and only escape from a life of pain and misery that he had thought of…but it was also the most drastic.

Gently he opened the lid and let it fall to the floor with a muffled thud on the carpet. Inside the small silver and black object gleamed bright in the light from the midday sun. He took it out and threw the empty box over his shoulder. For a moment he held the gun, turning it this way and that and watching how the sunlight played across the smooth silver surface. He swallowed hard and put the barrel to his left temple with a shaking hand, but he quickly jerked it away. Cold sweat ran down his face and soaked the front of his summer shirt.

This was insane. What the hell was he thinking?!? Suicide was the coward's way out and Jason was not a coward…but then again, said a little voice in the back of his mind. Can you really live like this for the rest of your miserable life?

Jason laid the gun in his lap and returned his gaze to the window; he wiped his sweaty palms on his pants and closed his eyes as a thousand different thoughts buzzed around inside of his head. Finally, he made up his mind and picked up the gun again, but making up his mind was one thing. Did he actually have what it took to pull the trigger?

So, should I continue or let it go back to collecting dust? Just press that pretty little purple button and review. No flames though, they will be laughed at and ignored. :)