Disclaimer: I do not own American Dad or WWE. They are owned by Seth MacFarlane and Vince McMahon, respectively. I do not own the wrestlers or the celebrities as well.
Opening Act
The episode opens with the intro to every WWE show with the "Then, Now, Forever" video.
The screen shows a white screen. Out of nowhere, Vince McMahon shows up.
"Hello, relax this is American Dad: Pen123 Edition. You guys are not lost. Please don't exit the site. So anyways, I'm honored to be parodied here in this fan fiction universe. This is the first time appearing in an adult cartoon and a fan fiction site. Without further ado, sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. If you don't like it, then you'rrrrreeee firrrreeeeeddd!" Vince announced.
"Sorry, I just like saying that."
End of Opening Act
Act 1
The scene takes place at the CIA. Stan is playing computer games on his desktop computer.
"Oh how I wish I can go somewhere far from here" he told himself.
"Hey Stan, are you coming over for poker night?" his friend Dick appeared.
"I wish I could but I told Francine I was going to help her clean the gutters" Stan explained.
"Man you're missing out; get out of here and come chill with us" his friend Jackson arrived.
Deputy Avery Bullock arrives.
"Greetings, my fellow CIA children; I have a special announcement for you guys. As you can see, I have two tickets to a special sporting event. Let's just say it's better than basketball, soccer, football, and every other sport combined!" he announced.
"That's great sir, but if it's Little League or something, I think I'll pass" Stan said as everyone else agreed with him.
"Don't interrupt me Smith, but anyways, the winner will get these tickets in a raffle I just created" Bullock shows them a huge dragon's head that pukes out a ball with a paper inside.
"The lucky winner is…all garbage disposal must be removed by the end of…oh wait, I don't know why I put that" Bullock wondered as he disposed that announced that.
"Anyways, the winner of these tickets goes too…"
"Somebody grab my butt!" Stan shouted as everyone looked at him all disgusted.
"Stan Smith!" Bullock announced.
"Yay! I win! What's my prize?" Stan wondered as he received the tickets from his boss.
"A live WWE show in Madison Square Garden? Awesome! It comes with complimentary plane trips as well. This is the best day ever!" he cheered.
"I thought your first kill against a thug was your best day ever" Dick wondered.
"That too" Stan answered back.
Later, Stan returns home and the Smith family is sitting on the couch, watching TV.
"Hi Stan, what are you doing here coming home so early?" Francine wondered.
"Great news Francine: I just won two tickets to watch WWE in New York!" Stan announced.
"How is that suppose to be exciting?" Hayley wondered as she is holding a sleeping baby Mary.
"Hayley, wrestling is awesome. Zoey and I watch that stuff all the time. Yes it's fake, but the storylines are much more creative that that other show" Steve said.
"What other show dude?" Jeff wondered.
"Everyone shut up and let me finish. The big question is who can I take to go watch WWE?" Stan wondered.
"Pick me Stan! I love professional wrestling. I used to be a top German wrestler before the CIA switched mein brain with a goldfish!" Klaus shouted.
"Shut up Klaus!" Roger screamed as the goldfish kicked him with his tail.
"Anyone else wants to tell me to shut up?" Klaus asked.
"Are you done? Well, after so much thinking, I'm taking Francine with me" Stan announced.
"Oh thank you Stan! This is going to be the best vacation ever!" Francine cheered.
"Oh well, at least I can spend time with Zoey" Steve told himself.
Moments later, Klaus finds Roger in the attic.
"Roger I'm sorry for kicking you. I didn't mean to hurt you like that" the goldfish apologized.
"Not now I'm busy" the alien said as he looked outside a window, smoking a cigarette.
"I didn't mean to hurt you, I swear. My anger got the best of me, that's all" Klaus explained.
"I don't need your sob story. Now get out of my site" Roger snapped.
"Fine, I'll just hang out with people…other creatures willing to be my friend" Klaus left while Roger laughed.
"What's so funny?" Klaus wondered.
"Other talking creatures?! You must be really high goldy" Roger taunted.
"There are other talking creatures out there. Trust me, I'll find them and they'll make better friends that you! You'll see!" Klaus left.
The next day, Stan and Francine are leaving to the airport to New York to go watch their WWE show.
"Oh Francine, this is going to be the best free date we have ever had" Stan said.
"Oh Stan, I'm so glad you picked me! Seeing professional wrestlers turn me on!" Francine said in a seductive tone as she was kissing Stan.
"Francine please; save it for the main event" Stan told her as they smiled and went inside their plane.
After a few hours on the plane, the Smith couple arrived to New York. They rode on a taxi and settled things inside a hotel room.
"Oh Francine, this is going to be so much fun! I didn't know you were a fan of professional wrestling" Stan said.
"Oh Stan, seeing two wrestlers going against each other turns me on!" Francine exclaimed as the couple make out.
"Stan, I don't think we have time though. We need to get to Madison Square Garden now" Francine suggested as she and Stan left the hotel room.
Meanwhile, Klaus, while still in his bowl, walks around at a park.
"Oh where will I find some other talking creatures?" the goldfish wondered as he saw a bunch of mermen and fish bodies with human feet.
"This just made my dream come true!" Klaus cheered as he approached them.
"Hello there; I'm Klaus. I'm one of you guys" the goldfish introduced himself.
"Hello, I'm Tom. It's nice to meet you fish" the merman said.
"Do you guys want to be best friends?" Klaus wondered.
"Of course, but are you wearing a costume though?" Tom asked.
"Uh yeah, about that…" Klaus runs away! The mermen and fish bodies chase him.
"Get back here! We just want to talk to you!" they chase the fish as we see Roger…driving a coach bus for some reason.
"I'm bored, so I just got a job driving buses!" the alien cheered as he broke the fourth wall.
Later, Stan and Francine arrived outside of Madison Square Garden.
"Wow, I did not expect that many people here. Oh well, I guess they're waiting for the main event huh?" Stan wondered.
"Here we go!" Francine cheered as the line started to move and they walked in.
End of Act 1
Act 2
"I love wrestling! It's the only place to get drunk on light beer and yell at half-naked giants!" Stan shouted as he and Francine found their seats inside Madison Square Garden.
"Oh look Stan, it's J.J. Abrams!" Francine pointed out an animated version of the movie director.
"Ladies and gentlemen; J.J. Abrams is directing Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakening, in theaters December 18th" Stan announced as subtitles of the movie is shown.
"Oh look, there are Michael Jordan, Michelle Kwan, Edward James Olmos, Alfonso Cuarón, and Jennifer Lawrence" Francine pointed out animated versions of the celebrities sitting and watching the wrestling show.
"Yup, they arrived in time for the main event, just like everyone else here at Madison Square Garden" Stan added as John Bradshaw Layfield's theme song is played.
(Cheering)
"Boo!" Stan jeered at the former world champion while everyone glares at him.
"What? He sucks!" Stan argued.
Later, Stan and Francine each drank more than 15 cups of light beer.
"Oh look Francine; Seth Rollins has arrived with his boyfriend Kane. I heard he paid for sex to have Kane help him win matches. That son of a bitch!" Stan said in a slurred tone.
"Yeah, and I heard Stephanie slept with the writers just to keep the authority alive in WWE. That lady is just a whore!" Francine added as she was also drunk.
"Hey look, the match is about to start!" Stan shouted.
Moments later, the match consisted of Dolph Ziggler, John Cena, and Daniel Bryan versus Kofi Kingston, Seth Rollins, and Kane, with Triple H and Stephanie McMahon watching in ringside.
"Dork Ziggler! Joan Cena! Danielle Bryan! Meth Rollins!" Stan shouts insults.
"I do not look like Walter White!" Seth Rollins snapped back at Stan.
"Settle down, young man" Kane instructed.
"Yes, sir" Seth Rollins responded.
"My God, they suck so much! Hey Stephanie, did you dad pay for your breast enlargement because you look like a ho! (Laughs)" Francine taunted loudly.
"Hey Kofi! Nice move working as a wrestler instead of going to grad school! Good luck trying to get a PhD!" Stan taunted.
"Oh no! You do not talk my son like that!" Kofi's mother appeared.
"Oh yeah, well do you know how much time he spent wrestling? He doesn't know because he didn't go to grad school!" Stan rebutted.
"Oh yeah, do you know how long this match lasted?" Mrs. Kingston asked.
"Not really" Stan replied.
"How the hell are you a member of the CIA if you don't know your math?" Mrs. Kingston wondered.
"Uh, I passed on a curve?" Stan lied.
Kofi Kingston looked at his mom at the audience where his opponent is seeking medical help momentarily.
"Hey mom, why is the forever alone guy yelling at you?" Kofi asked.
"I do NOT look like the forever alone guy!" Stan snaps.
Cutaway 1
Stan is posing for a meme.
"Seriously, I do not look like the forever alone guy!" Stan complained.
"Say it, now!" someone shouted off-screen.
"(Sighs) waitress touches shoulder, I love her!" Stan aka the Forever Alone Guy said while crying.
End of Cutaway 1
Steve and Zoey are surfing on the internet, looking at memes.
"Steve, why does your dad look like the forever alone guy?" Zoey asked.
"I honestly don't know. Probably the haircut, I guess" he answered.
"I guess you're right" she responded. "Then again, you kind of look like a scumbag."
"What?"
"What?"
(A/E Get it? There's a meme called Scumbag Steve and he does look like Steve Smith. (Cricket Sounds) You guys are horrible!)
"Zoey, this gives me an idea" Steve said.
"What is it, babe?" she asked.
"Why don't we create a meme of our very own?" he suggested.
"I love that idea! Let's do it!" Zoey cheered.
Moments later, Stan and Francine drank almost 50 cups of beer and an ice resurfacer carries all the empty cups of beer.
"Hi Chris Hemsworth" Stan told directly at Triple H. "Why are you the CEO of the WWE where you should be filming Thor, you dumbass? (Laughs)"
"I do not look like Chris Hemsworth" the CEO of WWE rebutted.
"Yes you do. You have the hammer, just like Thor!" Stephanie McMahon agreed.
"He does have a point, you know" John Cena agreed as he's catching his breath for a moment.
"Shut up, the both of you!" Hunter shouted.
"You do not tell me to shut up Hunter! I wear the pants in the relationship, while you're busy wearing my panties!" Stephanie shouted as John Cena snickered.
"Yes ma'am" Triple H agreed.
Later, Seth Rollins pinned Daniel Bryan 1, 2, and 3. The heels picked up the victory.
"You guys are terrible! Have you ever heard of defense? You guys should have cheated, you dumbasses!" Stan shouted in a very drunk tone towards the faces.
Moments later when the audience left Madison Square Garden, all the wrestlers gathered outside of a locker room.
"Guys, this Stan Smith guy made fun of my mom. Yes we're wrestlers and wrestling isn't real, but that really hurts my feelings" Kofi Kingston said.
"He called me Meth Rollins. He thinks I make meth. I'm supposed to be a tough guy, but I feel really hurt" Seth Rollins added.
"He called me the big red piece of shit" Kane added.
"Okay guys, I know you guys are upset, but what can we do?" Stephanie suggested.
"I know; let's find that Stan Smith guy and give him a taste of his own medicine! That will teach him who's boss" Daniel Bryan suggested.
"Good idea, my man!" Dolph Ziggler agreed.
"So, we're all in an agreement, then? We find Stan Smith and teach him a lesson that he will never forget!" Kofi Kingston suggested.
"Yes sir!" Seth Rollins agreed.
"I just hope the referee doesn't make us lose by count out" Daniel Bryan added.
"(Laughs) count out, he says. Count out, referee, oh God, (laughing out loud)" John Cena is rolling on the floor laughing while the rest of the WWE roster looks at him all strange.
"Is this supposed to be the guy who's supposed to be the face of WWE?" Seth Rollins wondered.
"I guess so" Triple H answered as John Cena continues to laugh on the floor nonstop.
End of Act 2
Act 3
Moments later, Klaus is running towards the Smith household. For some odd reason, he opens the door and runs inside.
At Steve's room, Steve and Zoey kept planning a meme.
"How about "I don't like your post, you get a bitch slap"?" Zoey suggested.
"Naw, it's done already" Steve disagreed.
"I'm too hot for this crap!" Zoey shouted.
"Zoey, that's it! Say it again!" Steve exclaimed.
"I'm too hot for this crap!" Zoey repeated.
"We did it. We have created our very own meme! Smile" Steve suggested as Zoey poses. Moments later, he uploads the photo with the captions "I'm too hot for this crap" written on it.
Moments later, the WWE superstars are waiting for a bus. There comes the bus that Roger is driving.
"Where to?" Roger asked.
"Takes us to Langley Falls, Virginia and step on it!" Triple H ordered.
"Ayay, captain, but can I get John Cena's autograph afterwards?" the alien asked.
Moments later, the mermen and the fish bodies arrived outside of the Smith household. At the same time, the bus that carried the wrestlers also arrived. Both approached towards the building at the same time. They glare at each other.
"Step aside, weird looking creatures! I got business to take care of!" Triple H demanded.
"So do I" Tom rebutted as he used his fish tail and knocked The Game out.
"Hunter's in trouble!" John Cena shouted.
"Hunter, shock it to death!" Dolph Ziggler suggested.
"For the last time Dolph, Deep Blue Sea was not real!" Daniel Bryan argued.
"But it seemed so real" Dolph said.
The wrestlers are getting their butts kicked by the creatures pretty badly. John Cena was pushed down and he slipped. Stephanie's legs were tied up. The rest were kicked in their heads.
Stan is looking outside.
"Francine, Jeff, Hayley, Steve, Klaus, and Roger, come look outside! A bunch of sea creatures are kicking WWE superstars' asses! This is the best day ever!" Stan exclaimed as everyone except Steve, Zoey, Klaus, and Roger were watching and laughing.
Klaus walks down, only to be stopped by Tom.
"There he is!" he shouted as the goldfish hid inside Stan and Francine's bedroom as the creatures chased him.
"Don't hurt me! I'm actually a human being trapped in a goldfish body! I don't mean any harm!" Klaus cried.
"You don't say? Gentlemen, why don't we take him for good?" Tom suggested as the creatures surrounded Klaus, but Roger approached and attacked them with wires filled with electricity and killed them all, except for Klaus.
"Roger, you saved me! I'm sorry about hitting you! I feel like shit Roger! Can you ever forgive me?" Klaus pleaded.
"It's okay fish. I'm sorry for telling you to shut up. Friends?" Roger asked as he and Klaus shook hands and they walked down to the living room. The WWE superstars surround Stan as he looks very scared.
"Guys, please don't hurt me! I didn't mean what I said at the live show. I have eaten 10 pounds of medicinal Resse's Pieces!" Stan whined while kneeling down and covering his head with his hands.
"We don't want to hurt you Stan" Dolph Ziggler said.
"Neither does the WWE nor its affiliates condone violence as a solution to any problem" Triple H added.
"But you did made fun of my mother and I can't let that slide! Where's your mother?" Kofi Kingston demanded.
"She's right over here" Stan responded by bringing in his mom, Betty Smith.
"Oh yeah, well yo momma is so ugly..." Kofi Kingston was interrupted.
"KOFI!" Mrs. Kingston arrived.
"Mom, what are you doing here?" her son asked.
"Someone forgot to tell his mother where he landed. Plus, someone also forget to use his manners! Apologize to this nice lady!" Mrs. Kingston demanded as she's pulling her son's right ear.
"Sorry, Mrs. Smith" the African wrestler apologized.
"Oh I'm sure my son did something to deserve it. Stan, isn't there something you like to say?" Stan's mom asked.
"No!" he snapped but his mom pulled his left eat in retaliation. "Okay, I'm sorry for real! Friends?" Stan offered a handshake.
"Aww, come here you!" Kofi Kingston accepted his apology and the two hugged.
Kane offers Seth Rollins a tissue, who wipes his eyes from crying tears of joy.
"You see, now that's what's best for business!" Steve exclaimed as he and Zoey walked downstairs as well.
"HA!" Roger shouted off-screen.
Later at night, Stan and Francine are in bed, getting ready for bed.
"You know Francine; I realized that the only way to get attention from professional athletes is by teasing them. That way, they'll find you and talk to you" Stan said.
"Whatever you say honey, goodnight" Francine added as she turned off the lamp.
(Credits roll)
It was late at night. Steve was getting ready to go to sleep. He looks at Zoey's meme. There was an article of a robbery in California. He used Zoey's meme on the comments section.
"It will be the best thing ever!" he shouted to himself as Hayley walks in.
"Hi Steve, are you going to bed already?" she asked.
"Hi sis; yeah, after a long day of creating a meme with Zoey, it will be the best thing ever" Steve explained as he showed his sister the meme of Zoey posing with the captions "I'm too hot for this crap!".
"The best part is whatever moment happens, I'll use this meme and it will create laughs" Steve explained.
"Steve, that meme targets predators. You need to take that down. It will attract pedophiles and the government" Hayley suggested.
"Oh shit, you're right!" Steve calls on his cell phone. "Hi Zoey, it's no good. The meme is not appropriate! We need to get rid of it, pronto!" he shouted.
"I know" Zoey answered, off-screen.
"You know? Oh no!" Steve shouted.
"It's gone for good now. Besides, I only 0 views, so it doesn't matter" Zoey explained.
"Oh thank God; well, goodnight everyone!" Steve waived to the audience.
End of Act 3
P.S. This episode had a similar plot to a certain episode of The Cleveland Show, where Cleveland and Donna goes to a basketball game. So yeah, I wanted to try it out, but use WWE instead, since WWE is fake. Read and review, and see you next week.