I stared at the table centerpiece, a beautiful floral arrangement that occasionally sent tiny balls of glowing light up to the sky, searching for an excuse to leave the table and not seem rude. I had just decided that I was desperate to use the toilet for the second time in ten minutes when Harry spoke.

'It's weird isn't it?' Harry's eyes met mine and the sadness in them froze me to my seat. 'Being back here with everyone celebrating like this. It's as if all that pain, all that death, never happened right where they're dancing'. He sighed 'I can't imagine what it'll be like going back'.

All at once it hit me, I was going to have to come back here for my seventh year, I was going to have to walk past the place where my classmates died, where my brother died, and pretend that everything was ok as I walked to class. I felt tears welling up in my eyes and turned my head so that I could see my mother and father across the room, talking with someone from Dad's office. I was not going to let Harry see me cry.

'Going back?' I asked, fighting to keep my voice level. 'I thought you were done with Hogwarts?'

Harry Shrugged. 'McGonagall invited to Ron, Hermione and I back to do our seventh year. I mean, we can't get most jobs without N.E. '

I shook my head 'You want to be an Auror don't you? I'm sure they'd take you. You defeated Voldemort, twice'

Harry looked down at the table and shrugged. "I don't want special treatment' he muttered.

Not knowing how to respond to that I turned my attention back to the luminous floral arrangement. I had hoped returning to school would give me a chance to reevaluate my thoughts, away from Harry. It was also going to be the chance to branch out on my own, without the achievements of the 'wonder trio' overshadowing me. Still, I was glad McGonagall was giving them the opportunity to finish their schooling, mum would be glad they hadn't 'ruined their lives' by saving the world.

It was Harry that broke the silence that had once again snaked itself around us. Clearing his throat as though he was having difficulty coming up with a way to say it he asked 'what's happened?'

'what do you mean?'

'To us? I mean it's not as if I expected we'd just get back together after the war, but you can't even look at me?'I turned my head towards him in a stubborn attempt to disprove his point. 'You know what I mean. ' he continued 'Even after we broke up we'd still joke around. Now you can't even smile in the same room as me. Is it my fault? Do you blame me for Fred dying?'

Sighing, I reached out to place my hand over his. 'No Harry. I don't blame you at all and you need to stop blaming yourself.'

'but-'

I shook my head 'No Harry. Fred wanted to fight. There is nothing you could have said or done differently. I am grateful for all you have said or did to stop him.'

'then what is it?'

'I'm not sure myself' I said, withdrawing my hand again. 'I think I'm just hurt'.

The look of concern on Harry's face was painful to look at. 'How did I hurt you?'

'I don't know Harry. I mean it hurt enough that you broke up with me when you left to go fight Voldemort, or whatever your big quest was-'

'I did that to protect you!' I could tell Harry's temper was rising.

'I know Harry!' I said, understanding my feelings more as I attempted to express them. 'But I don't need as much protection as you think' he opened his mouth to protest again but I hurried on 'yes breaking up was a good idea, If we hadn't Voldemort might have gone for me or my family earlier and we may not have survived as well as we did, but it's not just that'

'What is it then?' His voice was rising and I could feel curious eyes upon us from the nearby tables.

'You didn't stand up for me'

'What?'

'We were in the room of requirement, everyone was preparing to fight and Dad was telling me to stay put. You sided with my parents and tried to make me stay behind.'

'I WAS TRYING TO PROTECT YOU!' As Harry began to yell I felt myself jump. I'd heard Harry get mad before, but never at me. My own temper rose in response.

'I didn't need protection! I'm stronger than you seem to think'

'What does it matter? You didn't stay there long anyway!'

'That's not the point!' My hands balled themselves into fist and clenched at my sides 'the point is you didn't think I could fight'

'You're underage!'

'Who was in Dumbledore's army with you? Who fought by your side in the department of ministries? If there is anything lacking in my training it's because you didn't teach me' I said fiercely 'It's as if you still see me as the eleven year old girl who had a crush on you and got herself taken to the chamber of secrets!'

'Sometimes you are still that girl!'

I stared at him. The rest of the room fell silent. Even the enchanted instruments had stopped playing. I felt something break inside me and it took all of my energy not to curse him. 'No Harry' I said in a low voice 'I'm not, and this' I indicated between us as I stood up 'isn't going to work unless you realize that'. I strode out of the Great Hall and towards the entrance to the castle, not daring to look back once as I made my way towards the portkey home.