N/A: I am really, really incredibly sorry for the long wait. But things got real crazy and this chapter was, for some reason, the hardest to write up to now and I still think it could be way better. Hopefully, things will get easier now that I'm finally in college. Hopefully. Maybe.
Again, I'm realllllly sorry for the delay.
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or The Hobbit. They belong to Tolkien. The quote also goes for Marco Tulio. I'm not that wise. Actually i'm not wise at all. I love books though.
Anyways, enjoy :3
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"You know, it has been two days already." Olochen mumbled between chewing his meal, "Two days and nothing. We should have been packing by now."
"Aye. The others are growing restless as well." Raunín poked her toast with her fork, suddenly she wasn't that hungry anymore. "I say it's because they miss the sea and all. Lord Elrond should be back today, though."
"I really hope he sees me soon. Can't wait to be back home." the captain had been lifting the spoon to his mouth when he seemed to think better of it and rest it back in the table, turning to face the elleth beside him properly. "You said 'they'."
"Pardon me?"
"You said 'they miss the sea'. You don't see yourself like one of us, do you?"
"Olochen..." She sighed and tucked her dark hair behind her ears, "It's too early for this. Can't we, please, talk about something else?"
"No, no, wait a second. You're not even leaving with us, are you?"
"I-I don't know," Raunín looked away, unable to hold his gaze any longer, the betrayal and hurt she found there proving to be too much. "I'm sorry, mellon-nin. I never intended to stay. But the sea is not my home."
"Neither is here."
"You are right, it's not. But the forest..." the elleth shook her head, how could she explain it? The way she missed being surrounded by trees, talking to them, living beside them? "Imladris is not my home, but the forest is. I would not thrust upon Lord Elrond to shelter me here, but I won't lie to you Olochen, I cannot see myself living in the Grey Havens again."
"If not here, where then? Surely, you do not plan to live wandering alone in the forest-"
"Nay, I don't ."
" -nor Mirkwood, you're crazy if you think the king would take you in or if you would survive on your own in that woods. There is a reason for its name."
Raunín thought about days inside halls of stone and feasts in the moonlight, hunts that dured a week and getting lost together in the maze of trees, unexpected friendship that cut through her defenses and saw through her lies and blond hair that smelled like rain and leaves and forest. "I suppose you're right."
"You bet I am." The captain grumbled through a mouthful of food, but the elf beside him had her attention elsewhere, in a past long gone where she had been someone else, where a piece of her had been put together and fixed. Could she come back? She supposed she could, they wouldn't throw her away. But going back, it wouldn't be the same, she wasn't the same. She was someone else now, someone who did not know the royal family at all.
When she left, she had promised she would be fine, she would find a place by her own means. Going back would be admitting she couldn't do it and as much as she missed him, she wasn't going to let him down. After everything, she owed him that much.
But was the Havens really the right answer?
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"You've been here an awfully lot for someone of your age."
"I like it here. It's quiet and beautiful." Raunín looked up from the book she had been reading huddled up in the armchair by the fire for the last couple hours. "Besides, you do not know my age, Master Erestor."
"Only Erestor will do just fine, child." The older elf began looking through a pile of books in his table. "And you are wrong. I know you are young and that tells me enough. "
"I still like it here, though." She smiled but did not correct him, Erestor was wise and lying about this to him would be pointless.
"And that also tells me a lot." Raunín froze, her heart thumping wild in her ribcage as his words hung in the air and the silence streched and weighed in her shoulders. "It tells me you are a very peculiar elfling. A very smart one."
She let out her breath and manage what she hoped was a polite and grateful smile. "Smart, I"m not sure, but I do consider myself a bit different from the rest."
"It is a rare thing indeed to find youngsters spending time among old things like these."
"'A room without books is like a body without a soul.' " she quoted with a small smile, " and what better companion than them?"
"Indeed," Erestor smiled kindly at the elf as he flipped through a book. "But I am afraid few of your age would agree with you and spend more time than necessary in here. Aye, it's been long since this room was properly cared for."
"That's a shame." Raunín looked around sadly, the shelves were indeed covered in dust and she had noticed a few books and scrolls out of place before. A ghost of a memory flickered in her mind, rainy days spent inside a room not so different from this, a warm fireplace and the smell of ink. "I'd rather be inside here than outside in the courtyard."
She offered the older elf a bashful smile as he raised an eyebrow at the contempt in her voice. She couldn't help it, though, she had been taught to value diplomacy over the sword, to use her mind before her weapon, it was wrong of her to think less of warriors and she knew it, but her upbringing had been slightly biased and even time had trouble erasing it.
"I'm sure you do," Erestor finally stopped fussing over the books and looked up at her, "which brings me to my other question. You are not from Mithlond."
"That wasn't a question." Raunín bit her lower lip, worry starting to cloud her mind.
"No, but may I ask where are you from?"
"I come from Mirkwood, the Woodland Realm." The lie fell smoothly out of her lips from years of saying the same thing over and over. Besides, it was technically partially true, her father's lands were situated deep inside the dark forest.
"Mirkwood, uh?"
He knew she was lying. Raunín was certain of that. She had no idea of what gave her away, but something did. Maybe one of that body language crap she never bothered learning about or maybe Erestor was privy of some sort of list containing the names of who was born where or who is who, he looked like the kind of person who knows that stuff. Or maybe you are just being paranoid.
"Well, and what made you leave?"
"The shadow that fell upon the forest. When things started getting too dangerous, when evil knocks at your door, well, it is time to move on."
"I see. I assume that you are not planning on going back?"
"Not really, not now. I mean, I do miss Mirkwood, but things are still pretty bad there."
"I understand," Erestor smiled kindly at her, gathered his books and made for the door. "If you ever find yourself in need, child, do not forget that this is the Last Homely House East of the Sea."
Raunín drew a deep breath as she stared at the huge wooden doors, it was the third time in less than an hour that the older elf left her wondering if he knew something. Well, he did seem to know everything around a five-miles range, but then again, she had never been in a five-miles range of Imladris. But if Erestor had suspected of something, what would Elrond think?
Aye, maybe it hadn't been her smartest move to come to the center of knoledge and home of some of the wisest elves on Middle Earth, but then again, when had she ever chosen the smart thing?
Raunín sighed and rubbed her face, eyes scanning the empty room before getting up, putting off the fire and exiting the library. It was useless dwelling on the matter now, if the advisor knew something was up, he didn't seem too inclined to start gossiping.
She stepped out in the hallway and took a moment to soak in the warmth of the sunlight filtered by the window before walking away and toward the gardens, her mood improving with each step. As the elleth stood on the threshold though, she felt her good humor sliping. Outside everything was as still as a painting.
What's underneath the paint, though?
The stray thought danced around her mind, seeming to almost taunt her, ha, can't drown me now, can ya?
Watch me, she snarled back making her best effort to appreciate the beauty and peace of the scene before her.
If this is the calmness, man, it must be a huge storm coming!
There's no storm!
Nothing can be that perfect, that peaceful, can it?
Shut up!
Unless it's dead.
Shut it!
Death does seem to follow you, doesn't it?
SHUT UP! As visions of flames burning high in the sky filled her mind's eye, Raunín curled her hands into tight fists by her sides, nail digging in her skin, and squeezed her eyes shut; her breath, which had been rageddy and short at best, became desperates and uneven gasps for air. The elleth felt her skin on fire andstumbled foward, legs trembling and weak, tried to step back, away from the ( dead ) grass and away from the (dead ) fire and fell on the floor. The world spun as her head hit the granite and all sounds were drowned by the loud, thundering sound of her blood pumping in her ears. I'm dying, she thought hysterically while crawling to the nearest wall and hugging her knees against her chest, I'm coming home.
Raunín felt the flames lick her skin and burn down houses. She felt the fabric of her gear melt and ooze down her back, leaving the skin scarred and agonizing. She felt the hellish pain cursing through her veins and torturing her entire body. Reality ( ? ) slowly became fuzzy and blackness started seeping at the edges and Raunín knew she was passing out. Good, at least I won't die in too much pain.
It could have been either seconds or centuries ( it was just a couple hours ) before Raunín regained conciousness, she wouldn't know. All she knew was that her head hurt and nothing was burnt. Leaning against the wall for support, she stood up and checked herself for any injuries from the imaginary fire. All in all, she seemed fine.
She heard a bird, ( a very nice nightingale ),
chirping in the distance with a frightening clarity. Hey there, buddy. Doing many bird things today?
Great, now besides arguing with yourself and hallucinating, you're talking to birds. How very sane of you.
Fine, she might have a mild concussion.
The same bird chirped again and flew away. ( she should have done the same )
Raunín stretched her sore arms and brushed off the dirt on her clothes, it must be past noon and lunch would be served in a few minutes if it had not already begun. But as soon as she rounded the corner Raunín wished she hadn't.
Because, you see, she knew what situations like that usually led to. Trouble and a headache. She knew she should turn on her heels and pretend she never saw a thing, that was the smart thing to do.
But Raunín also knew herself. She didn't do smart.
Since the headache's aready here, I might as well.
So she kept walking towards the elves cursing her curiosity and knowing it was trouble.
As long as I don't end up like the proverbial cat...
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One hour earlier...
"They should've been here by now." Elrohir frowned, " What's taking them so long?"
"They will be here soon," Erestor looked up at the cloudless sky, " It's hardly noon."
The young elf resumed his pacing, he couldn't help it, his father's party was late and this whole patrol thing had been... weird. Sure, they were supposed to stay within Imladris but a lot of things could happen within Imladris, the ring wouldn't protect them against everything.
Like last night.
A shiver ran through his body as he tried to chase away any thoughts about the previous night. Elrohir didn't understand what happened there and he wasn't really feeling like analizing it now. There were more pressing matters at the moment.
Like the sudden sound of horses arriving in the yard.
" Finally." He heard Erestor mutter under his breath while climbing down the front steps and bowing. " Hîr-nin."
"Atar! Elladan!" Elrohir dashed towards them, two steps at a time, and came to stand beside Erestor again. "Did you find anything?"
"Not now, ion-nin." Elrond dismounted in a haste and strode across the yard up to the front door, not slowing down even to look over his shoulder and call, " Erestor, Glorfindel, we shall speak in my office."
Glorfindel sighed, patted his shoulder in greeting and dragged himself inside the house after the advisor.
"What the..."
"Don't ask me, 'Ro." Elladan shook his head. "They have been acting strange since, well, since we reached the borders."
"There is something, then?"
"I'm not entirely sure. Nobody - and by nobody I mean Glorfindel and ata - has told me anything yet." The older twin scowled and started toward the house. "Let me rest a bit before pulling this tread, muindor. I have a feeling that there is more to this than we have thought."
"Aye. We'll talk after lunch." Elrohir followed his brother inside silently, walking through the unusually empty hallways, before a thought crossed his mind and a mischievous grin spread itself across his face. "Unless..."
"What?" Elladan spun around to face his twin, a matching grin dancing in his lips. "Unless what?"
"Well, if you are not too tired, we could always take the longer way, no," Elrohir smirked delighted, "the scenery way to our chambers, y'know."
"The one that coincidentally passes in front of atar's study?"
"That's the one."
"And if we accidentaly hear something..." Elladan trailed off grinning from ear to ear.
"It won't be our fault."
"Not at all." He nodded entusiastically before hurrying away, his brother right behind him.
"Do you think they know what's going on?"
"For sure?" Elladan shook his head and whispered back, "Nay. But they know something."
"Are you going to tell me what happened out there?"
"Shhhh!" the older twin ducked back in the corner, pushing Elrohir against the wall with him. "Someone's coming."
The soft sound of light footsteps got closer, whoever it was would be coming their way soon. The identical elves held their breaths as they racked their minds in search of a good enough excuse. We're just walking! No, it would raise more questions, they need to avoid questions. We're just... looking for a... rabbit! Yes, yes, that one seemed acceptable enough. The elves of Imladris were used to their antics and would be less suspiscious of something absurd.
One minute passed. Silence.
They exchanged a puzzled look. The footsteps had stopped. Elladan cautiously peered out of the safety of the wall before motioning for his brother to follow him.
"What the hell?" Elrohir looked around bewildered at the empty hallway. "You heard it too, right? The footsteps?"
"Yes, yes I did. Whoever it was must have turned back. Or gone into one of the rooms."
"But Elladan!" The younger elf stared wide eyed at his brother, willing him to understand. "If this person had gone back, we would've heard their footstep fading, which we didn't."
"It stopped altogether."
"Exactly. And if they had entered one of the rooms, we would have heard the door open and close." Elrohir began opening the rooms and poking his head inside. "The thing is," he moved on to the next room. Empty. "one way or another..."
"We should have heard something." Elladan frowned as he watched his brother frantic, almost panicked, attempts to find something. The footsteps thing was strange, yes, but not enough to justify him getting this worked up. Elrohir was a warrior. He was the one to keep a levelhead during the fight. Something like this shouldn't scare him this badly.
"Ro? Leave it." He reached to grasp his brother's arm. "It doesn't matter."
Elrohir spun around and out of his twin's grasp, eyes wild and desperate. "Don't you dare tell me it doesn't bother you that this happened in the very same day you and father came back and just after..."
"Don't." Elladan grabbed his shoulders, forcing him to face him. "Don't you dare leave it like this. What were you going to say?"
"Nothing." Elrohir squirmed trying to break free. " It is nothing Elladan! Let me go!"
"Say it."
"Let me go!" Elrohir bellowed and pushed his brother away, stumbling to the nearest wall.
"Elrohir," Elladan took a deep breath to calm himself, the guilt already seeping in. "Hannon le. I'm sorry. But I'm sick of people not telling me things. "
"I know you are frustrated. So am I." He sighed before turning his back and walking away, "But don't take it on me. I'm as much clueless as you are."
"No, you are not." Elladan deadpanned ignoring the anxious look in his twin's eyes and the startled way he spun around to face him again. "But it is alright. It is not my place to force you to tell me. But remember, you are my brother Elrohir, I will always be here to help you. No matter what."
Elrohir stared at his brother silently, he wanted to tell him. He really did. But he had to figure out what happened first, he couldn't bother Elladan with childish worries, specially not now. After all, for all he knew, it could have been nothing.
Was it, though?
"You are a freaking sentimentalist, you know?"
Elladan shook his head but offered a grim smile at his twin's soft chuckles. "Shall we go? I do want to know what they are arguing inside."
Once again Elrohir trailed behind, still absorbed with the footsteps. He couldn't shake the feeling of uneaseness that it was related with his accident in the woods. If there really had been something there, as he was more and more inclined to believe, then could it have been it they just heard in the corridor?
But what it was exactly? Could he have been so close to find out? But why had he felt nothing? There was no dread or sickness. Was it because Elladan had been there too? Maybe it was too weak to take two at the same time.
Or maybe it was nothing both times and you are overthinking it, the reasonable corner of his mind supplied again. But he didn't really believed that, did he?
Since he was an elfling he knew he would be a warrior. It was in his blood and it was what he wanted. And as a warrior he had been taught to follow his gut, his instincts, and up until now they hadn't let him down.
Now his gut was telling him he had not been alone in the woods. Something else had been there.
Elrohir jumped startled as a hand shook his shoulder. Elladan frowned but said nothing, lifting a finger to his closed lips and motioning the door with a nod of his head.
It was Elrond's study door.
The younger twin copied his brother and pressed one pointy ear against the wooden door, catching fractions of the conversation.
"... dead in the first age. Second at most..."
"... is right, it couldn't have survived, Elrond."
"Then what was it?!"
"... don't know. Anything but it."
"It could be orcs, you...
"... be stupid, Glorfindel! The deaths weren't..."
"...might be right. It must be noth..."
"So, what are you guys doing?"
Elrohir did not shriek. Not at all. And whoever said otherwise was a vicious liar that do not know what they're talking about.
"Shhhhh!"
He watched as Elladan shot Raunín an annoyed glare, motioned for her to be quiet and resumed eavesdropping, altogether unfazed by her sudden appearence.
And that's Elladan for you.
Elrohir frowned deeply in concentration as Raunín tried to mouth something at him. "What?" He mouthed back and she shook her head firmly.
Which apparently wasn't a very good idea if the wince afterwards was anything to go by.
She tried again.
"What?"
She shot him an annoyed glare and threw her hands up in the air.
"What? Ceiling?"
This time she stared more in disbelief than annoyance. Not ceiling then.
"I said," Elrohir crossed his arms across his chest and watched mildly amused as Raunín walked up to him and hissed, "what's going on?!"
" Oh, that's what you mean." He smirked at her indignant huff, " I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."
She rolled her eyes and mimicked his instance, raising an eyebrow. "Oh really? I'm a guest here, so that would be incredibly rude of you."
" That would be unfortunate, yes, my bad."
"Most unfortunate, indeed." Raunín stepped forward and Elrohir moved slightly to the left, blocking her way to the door. The elleth had been trying to slowly move past him and that would be unfortunate. If whatever was being discussed in there were to fall in the wrong ears, there could be hysteria or, if the worst comes to the worst, it could hinder them in catching whoever was responsible for those deaths. It probably was very hypocritical of him to do so, since his own scarce knowledge had come from prying and his own brother was still glued to the door. "Now, are you going to tell me what's-"
"Will you two just shut up?" Elladan's angry whisper startled both elves. They had forgotten entirely that the older elf was there and that those inside the room must not hear them. "We have to go. Now."
"But Elladan-"
"Now." The older twin hurried away from the door and grabbed both Elrohir and Raunín in a firm grip, tugging them along the corridor. " Come on!"
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Elrohír had two siblings.
One slightly and debatably older brother and one younger sister. His baby sister. ( Arda would have changed many times and Arwen would be long, long gone before he could think of her as anything but his baby sister. He saw her hair turn grey and the crinkles of a lifetime of smiles adorn her eyes, he saw her raise her children and saw her mourn a husband, he saw her spend her days and buried her body under the golden leaves of Lothlorien. And it was still long, long after all this had come to pass before he could admit that perhaps his baby sister had grown up. )
Elrohír had two siblings. He had a twin, for Heaven's sake! He was used to sharing stuff. All his life he had to share his toys and his parents with his siblings. He was fine with one or both of said siblings invading his chamber, it had happened many times before.
( Elrohir had lost count of how many times Elladan had spent the night there when they were elflings because they had been talking and lost track of time or simply because it was too dark and scary to sleep alone even though neither of them would admit it. )
So Elrohir had come to peace with that.
What he was not fine with was the fact that there was an elf he barely knew sitting cross legged in his carpet with her back against his bed in his chambers.
Elrohir was so not fine with that.
And he had said so. Loudly. But Elladan was not to be deterred by any of his very sensible protests. He had been too busy pacing around and glaring at Raunín.
"Who are you?"
Damn it, Elladan! My room is not an interrogating room. I'm not even sure if that's a real thing!
"My name is Raunín, hîr-nin. I believe we've met before. I was with the Mithlond party."
"I see."
It took every ounce of strenght Elrohír possessed to not roll his eyes at his twin's attempt of sounding intimidating. It was not working and it was bloody ridiculous.
"I beg your pardon, but could anyone tell me wh-"
"Why were you spying us?"
"Excuse me?"
"Answer the question."
"Elladan, I do not think-"
"Hush, muindor. Let me handle this."
This time Elrohir did roll his eyes because letting you handle this is going really great so far, isn't it?
"I wasn't spying on you."
"So what were you doing then?"
"... walking in the hallway?"
"And to what end?!"
"... getting to the Dining Hall?"
"How interesting that you just happened to be walking in the same hallway than we were, don't you think?"
"No, not really. Imladris is not that huge, you know?"
"Elladan, please-"
"I'm almost through her, Elrohir. Could use some help, though."
Elrohir fell back on his bed, the mattress groaning and sinking under his weight, and covered his eyes with one arm; supressing a pained moan. His brother was spetacularly making a fool of himself and was now dragging him down with him.
"Why were you inquiring my brother?"
"I was curious."
"Explain."
"Well, when one sees two lordlings eavesdropping, one is bound to be curious."
Elrohir snickered and sat up again, eyeing his brother's now red face and waiting for the storm to blow.
"I'll have you know I am no lordling and-"
"That's quite enough, don't you think, brother?"
"Elrohír-"
"I'm sure Raunín will forget easily enough that she saw us lingering outside our father's study, won't you?" He waved his brother off and fixed the elleth with a pointed look.
"Forget what? As far as I can recall the hallway was empty."
"Thank you."
"May I go now?"
"Yes, yes, of course."
Elrohir jumped out of bed and unlocked the door, stepping outside with her. "I'm really sorry about my brother."
" It's fine, no hard feelings."
"He can be a bit... dramatic at times."
"You don't say," She snorted, "He's really a 'better safe than sorry' kind of guy."
"I suppose," Elrohir looked back into the room. He should be getting inside, Elladan was starting to fidget. "Again, I am sorry about this."
"No problem." She shook her head, "Will I see you at lunch?"
"Don't think so. We're eating in here today." He nodded at his chamber.
"I understand." She excused herself and Elrohir went back inside, kicking the door closed on his way.
He looked at his brother sitting on his bed.
Elladan stared silently back at him.
Elrohir stood awkardly at the door.
Elladan held his gaze.
"You're such an idiot."
"Like you are any better."
"At least I don't go around interrogating people!"
"That was quite justified!"
Elrohir snorted and dropped gracelessly beside his brother. They were dancing around the subject but it would have to be addressed sometime. He sighed and rested his head in the wall.
"'Dan?"
"Yes?"
"What did you hear?"
"Elrohír, please, let us not-"
"Elladan."
"Oh, muindor, it is awful."
"I heard there was a death?"
"Deaths. Plural."
"Any clue on the culprit?"
"I didn't understand exactly what they were saying," Elladan started carefully, looking anywhere but his brother. "but apparently it was neither orcs nor wolves."
"Could it be men?"
Elladan hesitated, seemed to think carefully over the answer. Finally, he settled with a "that's what Father thinks."
"That's what Father thinks?"
"Aye."
"And he is right?"
"I hope so. Because from what I gather," Elrohir watched his brother turn fully to face him, brows creased in a frown and concern clear in his eyes, "the other option is impossible."
Elrohír didn't know what to say. In fact, he didn't even know what to think. How did those deaths tie with the Woods Incident? And what about the Footsteps Incident? Were they related at all? Could anyone have had a similar incident?
"Elrohír? Are you alright?"
"Yes, yes. It's just," He gestured vaguely around him as if he was going to say more but resigned himself to a tired sigh. "Do you think they know we were listening?"
"I don't think so. Even though you were making an awful lot of noise."
Elrohír nodded. "Come, brother, let's see if there's still food for us in the kitchen." He got up, stretched and offered Elladan his best fake smile, "I heard they were making lemon cake for dessert."
His brother was not to be fooled.
"Elrohir?"
"Yes?"
"It's going to be alright. We are going to be alright."
"I know."
Elladan smoothed his tunic and followed his brother out of the door and toward the kitchens.
"Now, what was that again about lemon cakes?"
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"Regrets collect like old friends
Here's to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play"
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N/A: Reviews?