Pixie says: Please don't hurt me. I'm so sorry it's late. I'm not abandoning this fic, and I don't know why I haven't published sooner. I have a few chapters already written up so it's just a matter of editing and publishing them. Here's chapter 10. Thanks for sticking with me to the double-digits, and thank you so so so much for all the wonderful reviews. I'm going to try to take the time next week to reply individually to them! And for those who asked, yes, I am planning on adding romance here, but that will probably be much later. For now, enjoy some angst. Hope I didn't go too overboard with this chapter.

I've had a rough last few weeks, so I'm gonna try to get my shit together and update more regularly, but I can't make any promises. Apart from still being super sick, I've changed meds and the transition was awful, and then a few days before Halloween, a dear friend of mine committed suicide. I was really down in the dumps, so my dad actually took a week off of work in Dubai to spend time with me in Sweden, haha.

Anyway, without further ado, here is CHAPTER TEN (*squeal*). Hope it's to your liking!

If Nikita had to guess how her first interaction alone with the mysterious blond would play out, this would be the last thing she'd imagine.

To her surprise, she woke up in time to join everyone for breakfast. Though she could barely eat anything, and Killua gave her the stink eye for that the entire time, Nikita tried to relish the time she had with the kind-hearted musician she was seated beside.

"How's your training going?" Senritsu asked her, trying to make light conversation.

"I'm not progressing very fast…" Nikita admitted, flinching slightly. She couldn't help but notice Kurapika's hand harden around his glass, but she tried to ignore it.

"Oh, well, we have the day off today, so I could sit in with you and see if I can give you any pointers," Senritsu offered, and Nikita smiled at that.

"That would be nice."

And that's exactly what happened. They sat in the living room, all of them- including the Kurta. Both he and Leorio were reading their own books while Nikita sat cross-legged on the floor, Gon and Killua in front of her. Senritsu was on the couch, watching their lesson progress. Nikita had been flustered at all the attention she was getting at first, but she slowly got used to it.

"Okay, now try to open the channels in your eye," Gon tried to guide her. They had been stuck on teaching her Gyo for a couple of days, as they wanted to illustrate the difference between her aura and theirs. Nikita closed her eyes and tried to do what she was instructed. It was like trying to isolate a muscle she didn't know existed, and it felt almost impossible. Over half an hour of strained silence passed before she dared open her eyes, only to be greeted by the curious and expectant faces of the boys sitting in front of her.

It had been there, but only for a brief second, before she felt herself get suddenly dizzy. To her dismay, her upper body gave out and she fell on her side, momentarily too exhausted to move.

"Nikita?!" Gon exclaimed, crawling up to her. He was relieved to see her smiling up at him. "Are you okay?"

"Sorry. My body gave up. I saw it though. Not for very long, but it worked. It was like, mist surrounding you. A thin layer just covering your body," she described and Gon instantly beamed at her before helping her sit up.

"You did it!" he told her, high fiving her. Killua muttered a barely audible "finally". He had told her time and time again that they had mastered the basics in a matter of hours, but Gon had made her feel less bad by letting her know that they were special. Whatever that meant.

"Why don't we take a break?" Killua suggested, seeing Nikita's body sway when Gon let go of her.

"Please," she said, and Senritsu laughed at that.

"Good work," Senritsu commended her and that had Nikita grinning from ear to ear.

"Thank you! I think I'll go lay down a bit," she said, trying to stand up. Gon helped her and passed her the crutches so she could get more support. Smiling gratefully, she told she would be back in a bit, and made her way to her room.

Once there, she was surprised by how cold it was and realized that someone had left the window open. It had probably been Senritsu, since the white noise of the city often helped calm her down from the incessant pounding of everyone's hearts. She hadn't explicitly told Nikita, but Senritsu found Kurapika's heartbeats distressful, and Nikita could see it.

Nikita left the window as it was and was about to head to the bathroom to wash her face when something moved out of the corner of her eyes.

Her head snapped to look at the made-up bed situated beneath the window and her eyes widened. A small, but lively jumping spider was on the dark green bed sheets belonging to her blond roommate. Remembering Leorio's previous advice, Nikita made her way towards it. She grabbed a piece of tissue paper from her bedside table and tried to catch the spider and throw it out.

"Hey there, how did you get all the way up here?" she asked softly as she picked up the arachnid. Its eyes were huge and bright, and colours shone off it in a way that reminded her of Mother-of-pearls. She moved her hands up to the window and was about to let it crawl out when she heard footsteps.

It happened so fast, she had no time to react. All at once, her feet were no longer on the ground and her back smashed into the wall. She felt something cold wrap around her throat and her vision went black as the back of her head slammed against the wall behind her.

"Scum," came the voice of the Kurta before her, but it was twisted and livid. Nikita tried to gasp for breath, but his hand tightened around her throat. She could feel something under his touch, too, almost like a snake, coiling tightly around her neck. "I bet you thought it would be funny to leave a spider on my bed, right?" he pressed, squeezing her harder for a second.

Nikita panicked. Her vision swam and she was running out of oxygen fast. Her heart was pounding in her ear and she worried she'd lose control of her aura again. She'd killed some of her kidnappers before, she didn't want to hurt the friend of those who'd cared for her, even if he was about to kill her. She tried to take a look at his expression and was surprised to see bright red eyes staring at her, a calm sort of ferocity taking over them.

Her eyes glazed over and she tried to kick him, but he dodged her futile attempts easily, elbowing her gut instead to make her stop. More air got knocked out of her and Nikita realized she was at her limit. She was about to go out cold, when she heard a loud clash.

And just like that, Nikita found herself able to breathe again. She had slid down the wall and was now slumped on the floor. A few feet from her, Kurapika was on his knees. Gasping, she put a hand around her throat. Her breathing was scratched and raspy, and white spots clouded her vision. She looked around, terrified, and saw Killua's form standing above Kurapika. His fist was clenched, and Nikita deduced he'd probably punched Kurapika. By the door, Senritsu watched in horror.

"What the hell are you thinking?!" Killua yelled at Kurapika and Nikita spared him a glance. Through the golden strands that covered her face, she saw the red in his eyes subside slowly.

Nikita was suddenly acutely aware of the fact that she was trembling, and no matter how many times she tried to inhale, she couldn't breathe.

"K-killua," she whispered, panicked. She saw him look up at her, blue eyes widening at her terrified expression. "I can't…" she began and he understood, immediately moving to her side.

"What did you do?!" he screamed at her attacker, but Kurapika was silent as he waited for his Scarlet Eyes to disappear completely. Focusing on the girl beside him, Killua realized she was probably having a panic attack.

"Nikita. Just look at me. Keep looking at me and try to breathe in," he commanded her, his tone a bit rough. She tried to do as she was told.

"I can't-" she rasped but he shook his head.

"You're having an attack. Just count to ten. Try to breathe," he ordered and Nikita tried it again. It took several painful moments but before long, she took her first shallow breath. She saw Killua visibly de-tense beside her when he realized she could breathe again. Her hands slowly traveled up to her neck, where she touched the tender skin. Her hands shook so much they looked like they were vibrating.

"I-I need to-" she began, but before Killua could stop her, she got up and made her way past him and Kurapika and into the bathroom. They heard the door lock behind her and within seconds, the shower was turned on.

There was some shuffling at the door and in came a bewildered looking Leorio.

"What happened?!" he asked, looking at Killua's shocked expression to Kurapika, who was still on his knees. He had been in the bathroom when he heard loud noises.

"Bastard tried to strangle her," Killua spat out, and Kurapika stood up abruptly at that. Now that he had calmed down, he realized how misplaced his actions had been.

Senritsu tried to give Leorio a better explanation, upon seeing his wide eyes. "I heard a malevolent heartbeat from this room. When we rushed here, Kurapika had lifted Nikita against the wall and was choking her. I-I've never heard a more angry heartbeat."

Gon was there, too, though he was silent, trying to drink everything in. "Was there a spider?" he voiced his guess, and saw how Kurapika tensed.

Kurapika's first thought was that she had heard of his dislike of arachnids, and had tried to prank him to elicit a reaction, but he knew know that he was wrong. He had experienced something similar to what Senritsu did before, and while he had been too enraged to allow these thoughts to register, he realized he had heard Nikita's panicked thoughts in his head when his hands clamped around her throat. He winced as he recalled that she had been more worried about his life than her own.

"You went too far this time," Killua told him, his voice low, and Kurapika nodded.

"I know."

Senritsu's eyes were trained on the door to the bathroom, and she knew she was the only one who could hear the girl's strained sobs in the shower.

"Let's… let's give her some space," Senritsu suggested, trying to move everyone to the living room. They obliged, but Killua hesitated.

"What is she doing?" he asked Senritsu, whose eyes softened at his concern.

"Crying."

Nikita slowly came to her senses and found herself sitting in the bathtub. She was still fully clothed and the shower was turned on. Scalding hot water pelted against her, but she felt numb. It didn't hurt, even though she saw her skin turn red. She had cried for ages, and she now felt hollow. There was nothing left in her to cry.

Carefully, she turned off the tap, checking her leg to make sure it was okay. She got out of the tub and removed her clothes, grabbing a bathrobe from the rack and wrapping herself in that. She left her discarded clothes in a pile in the corner. She didn't have the energy to tend to them yet.

Instead, she hobbled over to the mirror, her knees feeling very weak. She looked at herself in the mirror. She wanted to be surprised, but she felt so void and lifeless, that no expression registered on her face. Her bare skin was red from the hot water and her eyes were swollen and bloodshot from crying. She saw something else, and that made her wince.

Craning her neck slightly, she saw a purple band had formed around it. She couldn't believe it, but Kurapika had used such force on her that a bruise had already formed. What was even more surprising was that it wasn't in the shape of a hand, but something else. Something thinner and even. She remembered the feeling of something cold coiling around her neck and she shuddered at the memory, trying to push it away.

Instead, she grabbed a towel and wrapped it around her hair and neck. The room outside was quiet and she hoped she would be alone when she stepped out. To her dismay, she wasn't.

Killua was sitting on her bed, waiting for her. She felt her breath catch in her throat and she unconsciously held the towel tighter around her neck.

"Better?" he asked, getting straight to the point and Nikita shrugged. He was surprised to see the lifelessness in her eyes. She looked so tired and simply… done with everything. Almost like she'd given up.

"I want to go out for a walk," she suddenly said, rummaging through the drawers of her bedside table for new clothes. Killua tried not to stare or blush when he saw her throw a pair of clean underwear and bra on her bed. She didn't seem to care.

"Where?" he asked her cautiously.

"I don't know," she breathed, her voice still slightly scratched from her attack. "I don't care," she added as an after thought. She tried to grab her clothes and hold her towels in place as she turned to go to the bathroom, but Killua stopped her.

"Nikita, show me your neck," he said. His voice was low, but it was powerful. She shook her head in response and was about to continue when he jumped off her bed. "Nikita," he repeated, warning her.

She shut her eyes tight and let go of the towel on her head. It fell off her shoulder and she heard a low sound escape Killua's throat. When she looked at him, she realized he was livid.

"I'll get dressed and go out for a walk," she told him, her tone was short and to the point. She didn't have the energy to argue. "I'll stick to the street in front of the hotel," she promised him when he was about to object. "and I want to be alone," she added, and she heard him sigh loudly.

He could understand where she was coming from but he didn't feel too comfortable over the fact that she'd be alone and unguarded. Instead, he took his phone from his pocket and handed it to her.

"Press 2 for three seconds, and it'll connect you to Leorio," he told her. "If something happens," he added as an explanation, and she nodded. With that, he left her alone, closing the door behind him, and Nikita got dressed.

It didn't take long before she made her way to the living room, Killua's bulky phone in her hands. The entire mood was glum and dark, and she wanted to apologize again, but she felt so empty and just wanted to escape. Without even saying anything or looking at anyone, she slipped through the doors and made her way to the elevator.

The elevator door opened with a ding, and Nikita pulled the scarf around her neck tighter, trying to hide her bruising. She didn't get her crutch, as her leg seemed to be getting better, but she limped slightly- more out of habit than pain.

She briskly walked across the lobby, and was almost at the door when she heard a familiar voice call for her. She stopped, eyes clenched. She really did not want to talk to Seif right now.

Despite her thoughts, Seif came up to her. He was jolly and overexcited as usual, but stopped when he saw her expression.

"Nikita? Is everything okay?" he asked, taking in her paling, tired complexion and bloodshot eyes. She was about to nod and tell him she was going out alone, when he turned suddenly, shouting to the receptionist that he was taking a break. Before Nikita could react, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the hotel, to the spot a ways off where they always meet.

Seif pulled out his pack of cigarettes and offered out of habit. He smiled sheepishly and was about to pull back when she extended her hand out of nowhere and grabbed one, stretching her other hand out for a lighter. Seif's eyes widened as he passed her the lighter, and he watched her light the cigarette's end and take a deep puff of smoke.

"Nikita? What's going on?" he asked her, shocked at her behaviour. She passed him back his lighter and he lit his own cig, watching her expectantly.

"I'm just having a bad day. Or week. Or whatever," she told him shortly, and he was surprised to hear the tone of her voice.

"I'm sorry to hear that…" he trailed off, eyeing her. He could tell that she wasn't in her usual spirited mood. But one glance at her bandaged leg and he tried to be optimistic. "At least, you're leg's gotten better? Are you sure it was broken?" he asked her, trying to tease her slightly. She wasn't having any of that though.

"It was and yeah. I don't know if I should be walking without a crutch right now, but it feels fine, so whatever," she replied. Her dismissive attitude caught him by surprise.

"Nikita, do you want to talk about it?" he asked her softly, taking a puff of his own cigarette.

Without meaning to, her eyes began to water again. "I-I just want to go home," she admitted quietly.

"Well, why don't you?" he asked, his voice just as quiet.

"I can't. It's very far away and I have no idea how to get there, and it's not a good time to go back now," she told him, trying to be vague about her situation. "Leorio and the others are trying to help me, but… I don't know. I just want to go back. I miss my home. I want to go back to how it was just a couple of weeks ago…" Tears were streaming down her face now as she continued to talk. Gingerly, Seif put a hand on her back and patted her gently.

"I'm sorry, Nikita. But if Leorio promised to help, I'm sure he'll do the best he can," he said, trying to cheer her up.

"I know," Nikita responded, using her free hand to wipe the tears from her face. "I'm sorry I'm crying. I'm sorry for my attitude and I'm sorry I stole a cigarette. I felt like doing something reckless," she admitted and he chuckled silently.

"I think your two favourite expressions are 'thank you' and 'I'm sorry'", he chided, and she smiled at him. "Don't worry about it. And it's not stealing, since I offered."

By then, they'd both put out their cigarettes.

"I'm going to take a short walk," she told Seif. "I'll probably sit on a bench somewhere nearby, if Leorio and the others ask," she added and he nodded.

"I should get back to work. But you be careful and come talk to me if you need anything, okay?" he offered and she nodded.

"Yes. I will. Take care." And with that she started walking away from the hotel.