Jim took a deep, reassuring breath before stepping into Professor Krestridge's office. It was just after three in the afternoon, his professor's last class had concluded approximately twenty minutes prior, allowing Jim a little leeway if a few studious students had decided to stay late to get assistance with a current assignment. He wasn't surprised to find the classroom deserted.
"Look, I'm not going to argue about me not, how did you put it: "preparing the assigned material"? So if that's what this is about I'll show myself the door." He realized that probably wasn't the best opening to their discussion but he was not going to finish the assignment and he wanted to make that point absolutely clear.
"Do you believe this to be some kind of joke?" Krestridge demanded from behind his desk, a PAD held firmly in one hand but its contents were all but forgotten.
Jim's breath hitched and his shoulders tensed at the man's words, but he remained adamantly silent.
"Because you seem to be treating it very trivially. Well let me tell you, Cadet, I was there when the relief ships arrived at the port and there was nothing trivial about the survivors on board those ships."
For Jim that was the absolute last straw, he'd endured enough of that man's bullshit. Here this guy was acting so stuck up, as if he believed he had some secret, insider information because he'd seen the survivors. Never mind that Jim had witnessed it first-hand. He was actually fairly certain he forgot to breathe for a full minute before he finally exploded. Except this was the type of explosion where he was calm and calculated, aiming his weaponry in all the right places to inflict maximum damage.
"Really? Tell me sir, do you feel some sort of privilege at what you know?" When his voice grew low and quiet most people knew to retreat, unfortunately Krestridge had nowhere to run to. "'Cause here's the thing, you may know the events that transpired on that planet, and you may know what the survivors looked like when they landed on Earth. Hell, you probably even know the words Kodos spoke before he executed four thousand people. But I'll tell you what you don't know." Jim's rage had finally boiled over. He was done letting that man walk all over him.
"You don't know the fear everyone felt as food rations began to disappear. You don't know the relief everyone felt when they arrived on Earth, the relief smothered by guilt because they had survived when so many others had perished." Jim's body began to literally vibrate with pent-up rage, his wide blue eyes brimming with tears he refused to shed. "And you sure as hell don't know what he sounded like. The uncaring look on his face as he sentenced four thousand innocent people to their death. So believe me, I find nothing about this topic trivial. But if you believe for even a second that I am going to defend the actions of the man who put m-" Jim bit down on his tongue, swallowing his sentence before he could divulge too much information. Judging by the shocked expression on his professor's face, however, he figured his attempts were futile. "Who put all those people through hell then you are severely mistaken."
For a moment the only sound in the room was Jim's heavy breathing. He sniffed quietly, but in the silent room it sounded like an explosion. He shifted from foot to foot nervously as Krestridge just stared at him like he was a new species of life.
"Cadet," Krestridge finally breathed, mouth agape in shock.
Jim didn't reply, he simply turned to leave, wishing to retreat from the complicated soap opera his life had become.
"Cadet!" Krestridge called after him. "James. Why did you not say anything?"
Jim halted halfway through the door; shoulders slumped in defeat, only turning his head enough so that Krestridge would be able to hear what he said. "Because I never wanted it to be about me."
It was raining outside, the cold water soothed Jim's burning temper and allowed him to calm down before he stepped into his apartment and was bombarded with questions by his psycho roommate.
If McCoy had asked, Jim would've stated that the water on his face was, in fact, rain drops. As it was, it didn't even matter. When Jim returned home hours after he should have arrived, soaking wet, and eyes raging with more thunder than the storm outside, McCoy left him alone. Even the doctor was smart enough to figure out when Jim simply needed to be alone.
A/N: So, I suck. I was planning on updating this yesterday, I even told a few of my lovely reviewers such. But then time decided to act funny, and it all disappeared before I could complete basically anything I wanted to. So, that happened. But here it is, and now there's only one chapter to go!