A/N: Hello everyone! Thank you for the follows and favs. I Still haven't ever gotten a single request from anyone. You people are mean. Give me ideas! Please? I mean it. I have a pen. Give me requests or Dean dies. Haha, no. But seriously, please send me ideas. That means you, person reading this.

I do not own Supernatural or its characters.

Chapter 10

The next day, nothing had improved. Dean went out on a food run and when he got back, his brother was nowhere to be seen. He looked at Cas.

"Where's Sam?"

"In the bedroom. I think he's having an existential crisis."

Dean knocked on the door, and a tear-drenched voice emanated from inside, "Who is it?"

"It's Dean."

"Go away! I hate you!"

"You sure? I brought pizza."

There was a pause, "Okay."

Dean opened the door, "Oh man, what is it with you and the junk food lately? I-" Sam was lying face-down on his bed, crying into the pillow.

"What's wrong?"

"My life is hell! I want to die!" He punched the pillow, not moving. Dean's eyebrows went up, and he set the pizza on the dresser, before sitting on the bed and gathering Sam into his arms, "Okay, first off, you are talking to the wrong guy about your life being hell. I've been to Hell, and, believe me, this isn't it."

A muffled voice came from Sam, "I've been to Hell to."

"Yeah, but you don't remember. Take my word for it, your life isn't that bad. Secondly, you sure you want to die? I mean, you really want to go up to the holodeck and get chased around by a bunch of nutjobs who hate you 'cause you screwed up their apocalypse plans? Really?" Sam chuckled a little at that, "You messed it up to."

"Nah. I'm not the one who opened the cage and took both big bad boss angels in with me. I mean, you're amazing, dude. No one else could've done that."

Sam was quiet for a moment, "Thanks."

Dean stood up, "Hey, what are big brothers for, right? Now how about that pizza?"

Sam wiped at his face with his hands, smiling slightly, "Okay."

Castiel watched them from the corner, invisible. They looked so happy, so peaceful, so content in their world, such as it was. He felt the guilt welling up inside him again. He wanted nothing more than to stay here, pretending everything was fine, ignoring the guilt threatening to eat him alive. Still, watching them, he knew he couldn't. He couldn't sit, day after day, helping them, not with the secrets he was keeping. He wanted to tell them, he really did, but he knew Dean would not approve of his plan, and it was the only way. He had thought that he saw a way out, when he obtained Balthazar's weapons, but it had only taken one faceoff with Raphael, right after Balthazar brought Sam, Dean and Virgil back from the parallel universe, to prove that hope false. He had had the weapons, but he had been bluffing on that occasion, and he worried that Raphael knew it. No, there was no other way.

He looked back at the humans he had come to think of as family. He knew they would disapprove, but he was doing this for them, wasn't he? Or was his doubt, his guilt and his inability to be honest with them a sign? Was he on the right path? Regardless, he had a call to make. He still wasn't operating at full capacity, but he should be all right so long as he didn't have to do any smiting.

Crowley looked up from the ghoul he was torturing as Castiel appeared in the room, "Well, hello darling. And what sort of time do you call this?"

The angel stared at him, "You asked for this meeting. I assume you have something to say."

Crowley picked up a tumbler of alcohol, sipping it gingerly before holding it to gesture with, "What, not even a bit of foreplay? I'm insulted." He set it on the table, "Very well, I'll get right to it. Moose and Squirrel, your pets, I need their location."

"Not a chance. Why would you request such a thing? We have discussed this, I will not let you kill them."

"Well aren't you melodramatic. I recall our conversation. I merely wish to keep an eye on them."

"Why? They are hairless apes. They are no threat to you."

"They may be 'hairless apes' but they're dangerous. The location, now."

"No."

The demon looked affronted, "We have a deal!"

"Yes, and Sam and Dean are not part of it."

"Look, what do you think Sam and Dean would do if they learned of our dalliance? Grab you in a hug and wish you good luck?"

"No. They would feel… betrayed… I imagine."

"Yes, and when the Winchesters feel betrayed, it's a good idea to get out of Dodge. I just want to be in the loop when I need to call a taxi."

"They will not learn anything."

"Of course they will. They always do. Especially as you keep consorting with them."

"I can assure you, they suspect nothing."

Crowley stared at him for a few more seconds, then turned back to pick up the tumbler.

Castiel spoke, "Actually, the deal, I would rather like to speak with you about it."

The demon looked back at him, "I'm listening."

"I want out."

"What?! What the bloody hell is this? I thought-"

"I am having second thoughts."

"Why? We're on the same side here. You want Raphael's head on a pike, I want you to get Raphael's head on a pike. What's the problem?"

"I am uncertain that this is the right thing to do."

"You mean, 'would my Daddy want this.' I thought we threw out the rulebook. I'm the King of Hell, you've Fidel Castro'ed Heaven, we make our own rules."

"Not entirely. There is still right and wrong."

Crowley sighed, "Look, which one would you rather have, some temporary discomfort due to Squirrel throwing a hissy fit, which he will get over, you're family after all, they always forgive family, or all of us, including your precious little pets, not to mention the majority of the universe, dead. Because that's what will happen if Raphael takes charge."

Castiel turned away, "I am aware of the stakes."

"Are you?! Because we're facing Armageddon, and you're wringing your hands!" He sighed, "Are you in or not? Please make up your mind, you're worse than a congressman."

The angel considered. He was well familiar with the argument Crowley had just made. It was the same one he told himself every day. He forced himself to imagine Sam and Dean broken and bloody, Raphael standing over their bodies. It was the only way he could bear the strain of keeping this from them. Besides, he would only contain the power for a couple of hours, long enouph to destroy Raphael, no longer. The humans would never even have to know. This would be over soon enouph, and then everything could continue as normal. He could even tell them, and they would all laugh about it, after Dean yelled at him and possibly punched him in the face, of course, but it would be all right. Wouldn't it? After all, Sam had drunk demon blood, chosen Ruby over Dean, and released Lucifer, and he had been forgiven. And what other options did he have, really? The weapons? They certainly helped, but there was nothing there to actually destroy an archangel. No, they were useless. He had already thought this over, and this was the only path. The only choice. He turned back to the demon, "I'm in."