Mels's POV

"So? That douche hurt you, a smile can't repair what he broke okay? Don't you dare let him in your life again that easily"

I can't help but snort loudly at that comment and Tiff turns to me with a look of disbelief. I just return her glare steadily and try not to lose myself in her stupid eyes, that stupid face, perfect face. The tension in the air is clear and, with my eyes still fixed on her I say in a quiet calm voice :

"Everyone deserves a second chance."

Tiff watches me for a moment then with a frustrated sigh she looks back at Phil and proceeds to comfort him but I don't listen to her words, staring back down at the table, and I can't help feeling retched and upset. I know she still hasn't forgiven me for saying I hate her, but it was hard to tell her I was in love with her when she was kissing Chris like her life depended on it, even though they haven't been together for 3 years.

-4 months earlier-

This was it, I was finally going to do it after all these years. I was terrified but there was no going back now, not after so much convincing by Phil. I knew Tiff would be in the common room and while I found a bit of hope that maybe she had feelings for me too, my palms were sweaty and my stomach turned out of shear anxiety.

I took a deep breath before saying the password out loud, the portrait slowly making way for me. I walked through the opening, nearly forcing my mind to make my muscles move, so scared of rejection, not wanting my heart broken. But I couldn't keep it in any longer and I had to make the first move, I know how Tiff is, there is no way she is going to talk about her feelings, sometimes I wonder if she even has any.

Just as I'm about to step inside the common room and confront my best friend I stop, my blood turning cold, and my breath stopping, feeling like I might throw up. Tiff is there all right but she isn't alone, and she certainly doesn't have feelings for me, not when her lips are attached to Chris's, her arms around his neck like she's holding on to him for dear life, nearly desperately.

I just stand there, I can't tear my eyes away as I clench my hands into fists, tears springing in my eyes. As they break apart, Chris smiles slightly and pats Tiff's shoulder, almost in a friendly way which doesn't make any sense, then leaves for the boy's dormitories. Tiff sighs heavily then turns around and nearly recoils when she sees me there, me gulping away the tears repeatedly, no matter what I'm not crying in front of her. But I'm not the only one upset because I see tears streaming down her face, which really doesn't make any sense to me.

I don't say anything, scared that I'll say something I regret. Instead I start walking past her towards the dorm but I feel a hand on my arm, gripping me tightly and I turn to face her

"Mels I..." She doesn't get to finish whatever she was going to say. Because just then I break, my eyes searching hers for any kind of love but I just find hurt and guilt.

"What, you're sorry? A bit late for that isn't it? Maybe you should go back to making out with Chris, you obviously love him."

"Mels I don't love him!" She says, while I can feel tears pouring out of my eyes.

"I don't care!" I say, nearly shouting at her, making her flinch. "Why would I care, you think I love you or something? Stupid, delusional idiot! I don't love you, go find someone who does!"

I don't wait to see the effect my words have on her as I feel her hand drop, letting my arm go, as I rush out of the room, my own words burning my throat with regret.

-Present day-

I never told Phil what I'd actually said that dreaded day, too ashamed of my own stupid words. Maybe because I didn't want to believe it myself, I broke a lot of things that day, including my own heart.

But now I know that maybe, just maybe Tiff has started forgiven me, and maybe I can properly apologize to her because I need to fix this. I take a deep breath and turn towards Tiff who's still in deep conversation with Phil about that idiot Dan.

"Hey Tiff?" I say quietly and she looks up, nearly choking when she sees I'm the one who talked to her. I guess it's been a while. "Can we... can we talk during break? Alone?"

Tiff looks like she's waited for those words since the day I said the other ones, and her eyes light up a hopeful grin lighting up her face.

"Yes! Yes of course I mean... yeah sure." She says and I almost laugh when she tries to disguise her excitement. Well this is it then.

-break-

I walk nervously towards the spot near the lake where I arranged to meet Tiff, seeing a mop of short red-dyed hair already waiting for me, sat picking at the grass absent-mindedly. I sit next to her, not regretting asking her here seeing the way she looks today. Beautiful is the only word. I've always admired how confident she is with her look, it was two years ago that she decided to completely change her appearance by cutting her hair and dyeing it red. She looks incredible with her light brown eyes, almost orange.

"So, what do you have to say to me?" Tiff says, not in a mean way, she legitimately just sounds curious. I guess I've been just a little too be secretive about my emotions when it's really not like me.

"Well I um I'm sorry about... you know. I want you to know I didn't mean any of it quite the opposite-" I cut myself short, hoping to god she didn't notice my slip up, because I basically admitted I love her. But Tiff isn't an idiot and she turns to look at me, an emotion I can't quite place on her face.

"I guess that you didn't mean it but... Why did you even say it in the first place?" My eyes widen in disbelief, the situation just got 10 times worse because now I know that she doesn't know how I feel and what it did to me when I saw her with Chris.

"Before I answer that, can I ask you a question? And please promise to answer me honestly." There's really nothing to it now, I think to myself. I'm going to have to confess to her, no matter how much I want to just run away right now, no matter how terrified I am or not ready, this is the time. She nods quickly, searching my eyes too intensely for me.

"Why were you kissing him? Why were you kissing Chris?" She gulps slowly, looking down and sighs in defeat. "Are you two back together?"

"No! No no no..." Tiff says quickly, laughing humourlessly. "listen Mels the only reason I was kissing him was because... because I was lonely ok? I know it was stupid and heartless but I was lonely and I had... Have this crush on this person that obviously doesn't feel the same and at that moment I just took what was there. I told him though, I told him that it didn't mean anything"

She has a crush on someone. Of course, it makes sense now how Chris seemed distant with her and not really into that stupid kiss. My stomach churns for a moment because I got myself in this stupid situation and now I have no way to get out of it, I have to tell her, when she wants the words coming out of another mouth, someone she likes who isn't me.

I guess my heart was meant to be shattered.

"So this person... Are they special?" Tiff takes a deep breath and turns to me, it looks like she just took the biggest decision of her life.

"Yeah, she is." She says in a whisper, and I'm suddenly aware of how close she is to me, I can feel her right there her whole presence her entire person is just at my reach. "Yeah, you are."

And just like that her lips are on mine.

For a moment I'm just shocked, too taken back to even move. But then she brings me back to life when she cups my cheeks strongly and slowly I kiss her back, and it all feels so real. There are no sparks no fireworks but it's so much better. Because sparks and fireworks are so abstract, so fleeting. No, this is something else. Because I can feel all of her and I've never felt so alive, her presence so close to me, I'm suddenly so aware of so much, the grass brushing against my leg, Tiff's hand on my cheek, her perfume floating around me and the breeze making my cheeks slightly red with cold.

Just as she pulls away slowly, the moment is broken, shattering by a terrified, shaking, voice sounding behind us. We turn around at the same time and see Troye completely tripping over his words, so I get up quickly feeling his panic rise and put my hands on his shoulders.

"Troye! Troye breathe. Breathe and start again. What happened?" Troye does as instructed and takes a deep breathe before trying again.

"It's Dan, I mean Phil, h-he's in the hospital wing. Dan, it was Dan he hit him I couldn't stop it, Dan just kept hitting him... It was Dan..."

And just like that he broke down into tears, his sobs and words echoing in my ears while I ran down the halls so fast like I'd never ran before, Tiff's hand gripping mine firmly, hoping to god that this was just one big misunderstanding.