The kiss didn't last long, just about as soon as he made contact, she pushed him away. Somewhat confused, he looked at her and saw she was furious. The next thing he saw was her hand coming straight towards his face.

"Roy Mustang are you insane?" demanded a very angry voice. He had never heard Erika angry before. Erika didn't get angry. The always pleasant overtones within her voice had vanished and revealed a familiar lower, delicate voice that was far more accustomed to yelling.

"Riza," he breathed, his eyes finally seeing through her disguise completely, wiping away every doubt he had. There was no waiting any longer, no questioning his sanity, it really was her. The plan hadn't gone accordingly, but who could argue with these results?

"Are you a complete idiot?" she demanded again. "This is one of the most important events of your career and you risk undoing years of progress to seduce your assistant?!"

"I wasn't trying to seduce my assistant! I was trying to seduce you!" he insisted, realizing how stupid he sounded, but not caring because he was lost in the bliss of knowing she was really alive. "I mean, I was trying to seduce my assistant to prove she was you!"

"Do you even understand the severity of the mission you just compromised?" she was absolutely livid at this point, angered by his actions and his current state of responding to her scolding with his big dopey, love-struck grin. "I can't believe you would be so irresponsible! What were you thinking?!"

"I'm sorry, I just-."

"How could you be so irresponsible?!"
"Hawkeye, if I could just-."

"What were you thinking?! I mean did you even consider-."

"I'm sorry, okay? Is that what you want me to say? Everyone said you were dead, Riza! Dead! What was I supposed to do? Why would you want me to believe you were dead?!"

Her face remained unchanged, still utterly harsh and furious. As he yelled, he moved closer to her so their eyes were once again aligned. She stared him down as he tried to catch his breath realizing for the first time he was feeling more than just relief, as there was still so much he didn't know about the situation and he was furious. He was confused. He was hurt. He was scared.

"Because I was a threat to you," she whispered bleakly. Her bottom lip trembled, as if she was fighting back tears.

"That's ridiculous," he started.

"No it's not," she said as though she was utterly exhausted. "It's really not sir. I know you must see it, but you keep pushing it back like it's something you can ignore or come back to later but we both need to wake up and realize that… it's impossible. If you're going to change the world for the better then some sacrifices need to be made to get you where you need to be."

"That's crazy."

"It's not," she insisted. "I'm sorry for the secrecy sir, I really am but you know by now that I'm willing to do whatever it takes to protect you. After the attack happened, I was taken hostage and they demanded information on you. I refused. Eventually, they thought they had broken me. They mocked me with all the different ways they could hurt you and I agreed to cooperate so long as they spared your life. But they had other ideas. They wanted to use me against you, use me as bait to lure you into a trap. I knew it would work. So I lied. I told them I had come around, that I believed all the things they said about you, that I wanted to help bring you down. They knew my history and how close I was to you and agreed I was the best person to take you down. "

"So you were a double agent?"

"Exactly," she said turning away from him, not exactly proud of what she had to do. "But of course I knew everyone's location and I meticulously kept you away."

"But why the whole facade? Why a new identity?"
"It took me awhile to recover," she admitted. "And to come back once I had healed, there would be too many questions. The terrorist organization thought I couldn't manage holding a military ranking and work for them. They needed me as a civilian to draw less suspicion."

"Did anyone else know?"

"Just my grandfather. How else could I falsify a whole identity and get a highly coveted job in the military? He swore to me he wouldn't tell anyone, and it was the only way I knew he wouldn't assist you in continuing to look for me."

"You still could have told me."

"No I couldn't have,"

"You don't think I would have understood? Why didn't you trust me?"
"Because of the way you looked at me," her voice was loud and sounded hurt. It was as if these words had been a weight upon her soul that forced strength upon her.

"What?"
"After the Promised Day, you looked at me differently," she continued. "The same way you looked at me when we were younger, before Ishval. Like things aren't complicated. Like you can overlook consequence. Like you seen me as more than a bodyguard or a soldier. More than a friend. That's dangerous. And I know how painful it was when I thought I lost you and I know that if I came back your feelings for me would only continue to put you in more danger. And I needed to know that you could see your dreams through without me, because your dreams are more important than me."

"That insane!"

"No it's practical," he voice was tense and firm. "One of us needs to have some sense here!"

"Says the one who faked her death to avoid her oldest friend."

"No, says the one who knows what it's like. The thought of losing you nearly killed me. But the world can afford to lose me. But not you. You need to be stronger than that. And I refuse to be the one holding you back when all I've ever wanted was to help you move forward."

"And that's all you've ever wanted?"

"Of course. Protecting you is my main priority."

"But why?"

"Because I love you dammit,"

She wasn't shy about saying it, and she did not say it gently. She waited for him to continue with the argument, her eyes serious and narrow, but despite her angered looks he felt his heart leap with joy. He felt his face turn red, his own expression softening allowing her confession to make her all the more beautiful. Under different circumstances, in another life, this situation would be much more romantic and this would be the most complicated thing they would have to overcome. And even though it was far from being such a thing, his happiness convinced him that time and consequence could slow down for just a few moments so he could savor it all. Against his better judgment, he leaned in to kiss her.

"No," she said, placing her hands on his chest to push him away.

"But you just said-."

"No, sir. I know that this can't happen. I accepted that long ago. But I won't accept you stop trying to fix things, "she was doing her best to get things on track, but how could he not be fixated on this revelation?

"I won't."

"You almost did."

"But you didn't let me."

"But I won't always be around."

"I know that," he reached out to touch her face, still in awe that it was really her face. "Losing you made me realize how short life is. I know our situation is… complicated, but I also know that you are important to me. So stop saying you're not as important as my dream, because you're a part of my dream and you're just as much of a part of all this as I am. I would not be here without you. I'd be dead without you."

"You were almost dead with me."

"At the very least I had a life worth living."

"Stop it!" she demanded angrily. "Stop romanticizing this. Sir, after everyone we've done, do we really deserve this? After all the lives we've ruined, this hopeless mess we've contributed to, that you're risking your life to fix, I don't deserve to be this person for you. I can't even imagine a life like that, where I'm anything more than your subordinate. I can't afford to. Even though… even though I care for you, I cannot indulge this kind of thinking because we've missed our chance at a life like that. So I need to protect you because I can't forget all the horrible things we've done but I need to see a world that's not plagued with our mistakes."

This information was nothing new. This speech was nothing new, he had heard bits and pieces of it countless times over the years, but never with such desperation in her voice. It sounded as though she had rehearsed this speech in order to convince herself or it all. But as well as he knew her, he never saw the full picture. He thought she said these things for his benefit, knowing a large part of his heart still existed in the innocence of their youth when the only thing keeping them apart was the awkwardness of first love. But despite the sacrifices they both had made over the years, despite the risk and uncertainty that part of him refused to die. He was still that doey-eyed teenager who looked at her like she was the moon and stars. Even when she thought her light had faded, he knew better that it couldn't possibly.

"I understand, Captain," Captain. She was his captain. His subordinate. He needed to return to status. He needed to compose himself.

"I don't think you do sir," she responded urgently. "There are members of the terrorist organization that took me hostage here tonight. They weren't supposed to be here tonight. I fear they've come to distrust me and are acting out. I don't know what they've got planned but I can assure you it's not good news for you. You're in grave danger and we need to get you out of here."

"Hawkeye, I know the situation is serious and you're mad at me but I can't get over how happy I am that you're alive

And before madness could ensue, he kissed her again, and she let him. Because in this moment, she was glad she was alive too.