Mother didn't emerge from her bunk until the morning.

I'd tried knocking on her door, a plate in my hand, but had gotten no response. I'd left the food on the floor.

Joo Dee had gone to bed early, blithering about beauty sleep and an exciting day tomorrow.

Tenzin and I had sat for a long time in the darkness, side by side, not talking. The train had whooshed along, ever-shifting shadows rushing past the windows. A sort of limbo.

The clock had ticked past two before we forced ourselves to bed. It was another hour before exhaustion closed my eyes against my will.

I woke late, sun bright and turning dust motes to gold. For the briefest of moments, I forgot what had come yesterday and marveled at the softness of my blankets and mattress. My fingers caressed royal blue fabric, soft as a baby's hair, and the mattress cradled my body like a cloud.

Then I remembered.

I scrambled from the bed.

Last night, I'd found a nightdress on the bed. Having no other choice, I'd worn it. Now, I tore it off and looked for my Reaping dress. I'd draped it over a chair, thinking to wear it again.

It was gone. In it's place was a similar one of much finer cloth, complete with underthings.

I gritted my teeth.

They couldn't even leave me my own clothes. The only reason I still had Kya's ribbon and Su's pin was that I'd gone to sleep clutching them.

I showered, dressed although my skin crawled, and plaited my hair. I pinned the Mockingjay over my heart and threaded the ribbon into my hair.

When I walked into the main car, I saw Tenzin had suffered the same fate. He attempted to smile but failed.

Next to him at the table, Joo Dee assaulted my senses decked in filmy layers of orange and lime-green. She had little flagpoles stuck in her hair, Panem emblem fluttering with every move.

Tenzin caught my eye. He mouthed, "Be nice."

I glared at him, yet clamped my lips shut and resolved only to open them for food.

It was excruciatingly hard.

Joo Dee gushed about the sights we could expect, about the people who were eagerly awaiting our arrival, about how marvelous and amazing the Capitol was - and I kept eating so I could keep my mouth full and also keep my promise to Tenzin.

" - and you'll have every luxury you can imagine, right at your fingertips. You'll be adored by -"

"Shut up."

I jerked, and yanked my head around.

My mother navigated the car towards us, one hand outstretched to warn her of obstacles. She groped for the empty chair between me and Joo Dee.

"Toph, good morning," chirped Joo Dee. "How did you sleep? Isn't it wonderful to be going back to -"

Silverware clattered as my mother fumbled for a knife.

It was dull, in case a Tribute tried to end their life before their death could be entertainment for the masses.

That didn't deter Mother from brandishing it in Joo Dee's face. Whether from blindness or intention, she got close enough that Joo Dee leaned far backwards to avoid it.

"Say one more word," Mother pronounced, "and I will shove this knife through your eye and into your brain. "

White as flour, Joo Dee looked terrified to breathe, let alone speak. Her flags stilled.

I couldn't help it; I laughed.

Tenzin covered his face.

Mother kept her head turned towards Joo Dee, her off-center clouded gaze disturbing Joo Dee further. She started to twitch.

Meanwhile, I filled a plate and set it in front of her.

"Eggs at three, toast at six, sausage at nine," I said. I poured juice. "Glass at one."

She nodded and her free hand found a fork. Without moving her head, she began to eat. Chewing with her mouth open.

Joo Dee shoved her chair back and scurried away.

"Might not have killed her," Mother remarked. "I'm not sure she has brains. Would've enjoyed trying though."

"You're not serious?" asked Tenzin, looking queasy.

Mother snorted. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Pale, he looked to me; I shrugged and, under the table, pressed my leg against his.

He'd never seen this side of Toph Beifong.

It was the side born in the crucible of the Arena. The side which had enabled her to kill people.

I had.

Most of the time, she kept it suppressed.

I'd triggered it on occasion, surprising her after a bad nightmare or when her memories ensnared her. She always came to before she really hurt me, but I usually ended up nursing bruises.

Before, that side had scared me the way it scared Tenzin now.

For me, it was now a good thing.

A thing, in fact, that I needed to learn and learn fast.

We continued eating in silence. Tenzin finished first and stood.

"I'm going to…" He looked down, struggling, "...to write some letters. If…"

"Give'em to me," interrupted Mother. "I'll see that they get there."

"Thank you," Tenzin replied, barely above a whisper. He left for his berth.

Mother waited until we heard his door shut.

"You might win."

"What?"

She traced the blunt edge of the knife. "Drop him, and you've got a chance."

My fork clattered on the plate.

"Drop - you - what -"

"He's dead weight. He doesn't have what it takes to survive in the Arena. You might. But if you insist upon sticking with him -"

"I'm not - I wouldn't - how can you suggest that I -" I waved in direction of the berths. "He's my friend. And if I, how could I face -"

"They'd understand. This isn't some jaunt in the woods, Lin!" Her fists banged on the table. "There's only one Victor. What's the point of wasting effort trying to save someone who doesn't have a chance and who would have to die anyway for you to survive?"

"What's the point - the point is -" I stammered, leaping to my feet. "I won't do it. I won't let them - he is my friend and if I don't - how could I live with myself if I abandoned him? What kind of person - we're in this together!"

"Even if you die because of it?" she demanded.

I thought about it. Thought about coming home and seeing Su again, seeing Bumi and Kya and Katara and Aang again, thought about visiting a fresh headstone in the Tributes' graveyard, thought about doing all that while knowing I didn't try to save him.

Bile flooded my mouth. If that came to pass, then I would be dead regardless of if my heart continued to beat. I wouldn't be me anymore. The person I was would never leave Tenzin to die, would never sacrifice a friend for her own advantage.

"Yes." The word came out quiet. Somewhere deep inside me, the word resounded, echoing as if in a vast cavern. My resolve hardened. "We're in this together. No matter what."

My mother slumped.

"I thought you'd say that," she murmured raggedly.

She held out her hand and I took it.

Sandwiching mine between hers, she squeezed. "You...I...we'll give them a good fight, okay?"

"Okay."