Okay, it's almost been a year since the last update, but its entirely all your fault.
Only two reviews, when I asked for ten. But I feel bad for punishing them and whatnot.
So my very deep thanks to Musette Fujiwara and peacesaveslol.
This chapter's dedicated to you two.
Oh, and if I don't get ten reviews, I will take down the story once and for all.
P.S. I don't own Twilight, or the lines/setting in the restaurant scene that I stole from Stephenie Meyer. From here on out, the story will be as close to canon as I can make it.
_memories consume like opening a wound_
When Edward came to pick her up a few hours later, she could still feel the jetlag at the edge of her mind. Somehow, she knew that no matter what step she took, the day would end in disaster. Biting her lip, she rifled through the CDs in the glove compartment before sliding in Debussy. Claire de Lune trickled into the silent car, and she melted into the calming notes, feeling her muscles loosen as she leaned against the leather of the car. The world outside Edward's Volvo was dreary and gray, trees towering into the rumbling sky and she remembered how everything in Forks blended in together into some monotone mix on days like these. The change was comforting in its familiarity, compared to the shockingly bright colors of Rome. Bella stalled getting out of the car, her hands nervously gripping her camera, as she climbed out, her Adidas sinking into the slightly moss covered forest floor. Biting her lip, she started the trek to the front door hoping violently that Edward would not make her go in.
"What are you thinking of?" His voice chimed next to her ear, words flowing like a song. Glancing at him, then back at the ominous looking house, she shrugged.
"Fate's a cruel lady," she said simply, the door opening in front of her to reveal Alice.
"We would have been great friends if you had found out about us some other way," Alice murmured quietly. Not knowing what to say, Bella ignored her.
The living room was modern, with a glass wall revealing a beautiful view of the forest and the rocky beach. Bella paid the view no attention, her eyes focusing on the two figures that were sitting on the couch, huddled together. Riley looked the same, but different. Her hair had grown out of its short length, brushing the beginning of her waist while the purple streaks look brighter than they ever had, going up to her roots. Her eyes were a vibrant red that shocked Bella, causing her to take a step back away from her. Her skin was paler, looking almost as white as the moon. But, oh, Riley was beautiful. It made her heart ache to see what she had missed. Elliot looked like shit. He had bags under his eyes, and he had lost seemingly half his weight. His hair looked like it had been cut recently, and he sported the same hairstyle that he had six years ago, red streaks and all. He looked at Bella indifferently, which she supposed, was the best response she could ask for.
The tension hung thickly in the air, and Bella had the vague thought that maybe she could cut through it with a knife. None of the three said a thing, all of them frozen staring at the other.
"I still blame you," Elliot's words struck through the distance and hit home. Bella took a staggering step back, and felt a shaky smile form on her face. It felt awkward, and the effort was just straining her, but she could feel the jetlag roar its ugly head at her so she grabbed onto the wall for support.
"I know," she bit her lip, her right hand desperately clutching the camera. Edward was at her side, placing a hand at the small of her back to support her. She leaned into him.
"How could you disappear like that? How could you leave me here alone with Riley? How could you leave us? Do you know how scared we were? We thought you were dead!" he yelled at her, the words bouncing off the glass and back at her.
"How could I? You're asking me that? I was dead to you! You said so yourself!" Bella retaliated, her exhaustion and sadness turning into anger. Elliot got up from Riley, and Riley did nothing to stop him, already struggling with the human blood in the room.
"I was grieving Bella! How could you take me so seriously?" he walked over to her, making sure to invade her personal space.
"And you didn't think I wasn't? With all the shit I was dealing with, you didn't think I wasn't getting as fucked up over what happened as you were? Goddammit Elliot! You're life wasn't perfect, but it was a shitload better than mine! Charlie was beating me half to death, and then my friend was dying on me! WHAT DID YOU EXPECT FROM ME?" Elliot fell into silence as Bella shoved him away from her.
"I WAS FIFTEEN! I WAS SCARED SHITLESS, AND NEAR DEATH AND IF I HAD GONE HOME, CHARLIE WOULD HAVE FINISHED THE JOB THAT THE VAMPIRE BITCH STARTED! I couldn't stay here!" She was panting, the room was whirling before her but she didn't care.
"You could have asked.. you could have talked to us," he muttered.
"WHAT WAS THERE THAT I COULD SAY? That something straight out of sci-fi books came and nearly killed me and Riley? That I was sorry? Sorry wouldn't begin to cover it with you, not with anybody! I was still trying to deal with it! It wasn't easy coming back into the hospital, hell it wasn't easy for me to get in that car! I died once, did anyone tell you? I died, and I came back because I wanted to come back to you guys! I wanted to fix things, I thought there was a chance that Riley was alive, and that she could help me fix things!" Rain was pouring down; it thudded sharply against the glass wall like pebbles.
"Then tell me!" Elliot pushed off the ground, staring Bella down.
"No, you don't know what you're asking of me."
"Tell me."
"No! Shut up, shut up, shut up!"
Elliot grabbed her arms, shaking her in frustration. "Tell me!"
"No!" Thunder crashed and rolled all around the house as the former friends battled it out.
_i'm picking me apart again_
I sighed irritably as I dropped onto the couch and mindlessly started flipping channels. Charlie was upstairs napping, and I was less than thrilled to be staying here for a daunting nine more days. My phone vibrated to life in my pocket, and picking up, I headed to my discarded luggage at the base of the stairs, pulling out my laptop and a wireless router. After sharing a few words with my secretary, I hung up and set up the internet so that I could get some work done before the day was done. Pictures popped up in an email, and I almost sighed longingly. Pictures that I had taken just the night before edited, and cropped; they looked amazing. Smiling slightly, I gave the okay to the email, and decided to write a congratulatory note to one of my senior photographers. The internet faltered, and I packed the laptop up again as I realized that with this kind of service, even dial up wouldn't get anything done. I wandered into the kitchen, looking for food. Minutes passed, and I grabbed the house phone to order a pizza for Charlie and I. I settled on top of the counter, swinging my feet back and forth, tapping my fingers against the counter impatiently.
"No!" Thunder crashed and rolled all round the house as the former friends battled it out.
"What the hell do you want to know? The day at the forest my mind was in a freefall! I was spinning out of control, and I didn't know what to do, or where to go! I was just trying to calm down, how the fuck was I supposed to know that Riley was chasing me down? How the fuck was I even supposed to guess that something like that would happen?" Bella was panting, and Edward's arm was wrapped around her waist, fully supporting her weight. Elliot stood across from her, tense.
"One minute, I'm just watching deer. The next, I'm hauling ass, trying to get away from something that was much more powerful than me. I was in a clearing when I hear screaming, and it was Riley. Her right arm looked broken, and she had a huge cut in her left arm. She was covered in her own blood. And the vampire just..attached herself to Riley like a fucking lollipop. Before I knew it, I was thrown back, and I was just hysterical and frantic. I had no idea if she was alive or dead, but I was hoping. And then I'm out like a light!"
The roar of an engine cut me off from my train of thought, Bon Jovi's Living on a Prayer electrifying the air. The beginning of a headache pounded in my temples, and annoyed, I set out towards the front door. The fog lights on top of a Jeep blinded me almost immediately, making me grit my teeth together as the headache went from pounding to hammering.
"Holy shit, he wasn't joking. Holy shit," a familiar voice filtered in, and I frowned.
"Duuuude! She's alive! How sweet is this? It'll be like the whole gang's back together!" a male voice yelled out, enthusiasm filling his tone. Gang? What the hell? Then realization struck. Stephanie, Randy and Tyler. I felt my eyes widen, and I jumped the railing of the porch, hearing Steph curse behind me. I sprinted to the Volvo Edward had lent me, rolling over the hood of the car, and falling into the driver's seat. I groaned as the middle compartment dug into my ribs, but Steph was already hauling ass to the car, so I shoved the keys into the ignition and slammed the car into reverse. I yelped at the sudden acceleration, and shifted the gear into drive as I finally straightened up.
"BELLA! IMMA GET YOU! IT'S A SMALL TOWN, YOU CAN'T RUN FOR LONG YOU BITCH!"
_another wave of tension_
"I knew you were going to destroy my car," Edward frowned, surveying the damage. "It's a good thing I lent you the least expensive."
Bella cried out, insulted.
"It's not my fault. You try dealing with Stephanie's temper. She's a firecracker, that one," she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. She took the momentary silence to survey the garage around her.
"What are you thinking? It's so odd, but I can never tell with you," he spoke quietly, leaning away from her slightly. His eyes looked into her face, smoldering then cooling and then back again. It caught Bella off guard.
"You must think I'm pathetic," she mumbled, her lips twisting off to one side in a small, sad smile. Edward stood, frozen for a minute, pouring over her words.
Then suddenly, his hands were on her face, tilting her chin up to look at him, his lips just inches away but from this distance, she could see that he wasn't breathing. Her eyes dropped to his lips, then away. Why did she suddenly feel a pull to him? Where did this come from?
"I think you're beautiful," he whispered, and her breath caught in her throat. Her eyes flew to his in surprise, and his angelic face looked pained, torn even. She felt her heartbeat race in her wrists, sparks flying up and down her veins like wildfire. Her eyes dropped down to his lips again. She wanted to… And so she did.
Little Bella stretched out on her tiptoes, and kissed Edward right on the lips.
_say what i don't mean_
The sun was rising in the distance, but for now, it seemed like twilight. The aurora was fading rapidly by the minute, while the waves crashed and roared against the Cliffside in an almost chaotic tandem. The last of the Quiletes' howling still trembled in the air, and I watched them turn and run in wonder, seeing the rippling fur and muscles in motion as they integrated into the forest with a mystical kind of grace. Sighing, I reached inside the Volvo, and flicked on the AUX input, my iPod playing Owl City's The Saltwater Room. I leaned back against the car door, the sun's weak light doing nothing to penetrate the winter cold all around.
A shrieking howl sounded off close behind me, and goose bumps broke out on my skin. I half stumbled off the car, twisting my terrified body to look behind me. Flashes of pale white and russet, each tackling the other in a battle of dominance made me back further away from the woods. I stood frozen, feet away from the cliff's edge and watching in anticipation as the fact that two of the very same wolves I have admired since I was a kid were fighting in front of me. Well, that didn't exactly spell out safe to me. A growl erupted in the early morning light, surprising me so much that I fell on my ass. Was I really that zoned out?
"I did tell you that you couldn't run away for long, right?" Steph's voice sounded amused, and warily, I grabbed her hand as she heaved me up into a standing position. I watched her closely as she stepped away from me and shoved her hands deep into the pockets of her skinny jeans and faced the rising sun.
"I always knew you'd come back one day," she said softly, her face not giving anything away to me. "Whether it was when Riley woke up, or something, I knew you would. I just hoped that it you'd come back for me, you know? I'm not trying to be self-centered or anything, I haven't changed much, but you were the closest person to me ever. Closer than my family, and you just upped and left. That was just traumatizing for me, having that shit happen when I was fifteen. "
"Steph, you have to understand," I pleaded brokenly, feeling the guilt overwhelm me and I felt claustrophobic. "Even now, I-"
"Oh, shut up," she rolled her eyes, smirking slightly, "Elliot called. He told me everything. That kid spent half his paycheck these past couple of years looking for your ass. We're not asking you to tell us, but when you go away again, at least call every once in a while?
"Major shit's gone down since you left," her tone morphed again, into something melancholic. "I said before that you leaving me at fifteen was traumatizing, but I need to explain. You've been with me since birth practically, and I figure, if I haven't come to terms with what I am just yet then maybe telling you will help. Because to me, you're kind of like the epitome of who I was before, you know? Like everything in my life comes down to Bella, and Post-Bella.
"Bella," she paused, ran a hand through her hair and sighed. Years of friendship told me that she was getting frustrated with herself, and it wouldn't be long before she started cursing out everyone's ancestor. "I'm a witch.
"Do you remember that fortune teller those years ago?" she barreled on, not giving me a chance to react to her confession. I nodded wordlessly. "She was right, to some extent. My mother kept this from me until my sixteenth birthday. It's none of that movie bullshit, or Wicca or whatever. It's just… everything you know? The earth and the fire, and nature. It's this feeling that's deep down inside of you and it pulls you. Makes you use it, makes it hurt to not use it."
"It's a part of who she is," a deeper voice filled in the lull in her explanation, snapping us both out of our thoughts. Steph turned towards the newcomer, and settled her hand on her hips, smirking up at him.
"Remember me?" the boy flashed a smile at me, pearly white teeth blinding me for a second. I felt my forehead crumple with concentration as I eyed him up and down. He was taller than me, and tanned, with shaggy black hair falling into his russet eyes. But the way he flashed that smile, and those dimples…
"Jake?" I gasped, eyeing him again to compare my last memory of the annoying, scrawny kid to this… man. "Jesus, kiddo. You make me feel like I've been gone a decade!"
"Don't be too hard on yourself," Steph muttered as she punched Jake lightly in the shoulder. "It's 'cause he can't age. He's one of the Quiletes, Bells."
More than anything, that took me by surprise. "What the hell? Why is practically everyone I know becoming something that's not even supposed to exist?" I ranted, fisting my hands at my hips angrily.
"So you do know about the Cullens," Jake raised an eyebrow at me and crossed his arms before glancing down at Stephanie. "Pay up. I told you she'd make the connection."
Curses flew out of her mouth in a rapid speed, and she clawed out her wallet from her back pocket before forking over a few crumpled up bills. "Fuck. I thought since she was out for so long-"
"Wait a minute. You guys know about them?" I asked, feeling dizzy with all this new knowledge. "How the fuck do the Volturri not know that practically half of Forks knows already?"
"Well, that's easy. The wolves and I need to be secret too, so it's okay that we know because we need all this secrecy bullshit as well," Steph shrugged. "And Riley's going to change Elliot as soon as she can get some control over herself."
"And Randy and Tyler? What, are they like... werebats or something?" I murmured exasperatingly as I ran a hand through my hair. Jake let out a roar of laughter, swinging an arm around Steph for support.
"Nah, but Randy's Steph's familiar or something," Jake finally admitted, and Steph wrinkled her nose beside him.
"You're making him sound like he's gay or something," she rolled her eyes, and then turned back to me. "Tyler's normal, so far as he knows. But I don't really know… I have a feeling his human status is going to be changed sometime soon."
"Can someone explain to me what are the chances of having so much supernatural shit happen in the smallest, most boring town in the continental U.S. all at once?" I demanded, shoving away from the pair as I did. "No, seriously. If it wasn't for this secrecy thing, this shit would go down in history. Fucking witches, wolves and vampires? Is there like, a secret war or something too?"
"Dude, don't pull a Leo from Transformers on me," Steph said, turning serious suddenly as she clutched my shoulders to keep me still. "Maybe you should get some food and sleep. You're probably all fucked up 'cause of the jetlag and shit. And it might have been too soon to spring everything else on you too, now that I'm really thinking about it."
Pulling in a deep breath, I walked towards the Volvo, unlocking the car door as I spoke, "You still know me like the back of your hand, Steph. But seriously, anything else I should know about?"
Jake strode forward as I shut the door closed and the car roared to life. He leaned close to me as I lowered the window for him, searching thoroughly through my eyes. "Yeah, one other thing: if they bite someone, treaty's over."
"Bite? Like change someone? Then what about Elliot?" my frown deepened, as my eyes trailed over to Steph who was standing a distance away from us. Her mouth was twisted into a sneer as she glared daggers at Jacob's back.
"Doesn't matter who it is. We'll bring the fight to their doorstep once they change him," Jake shrugged nonchalantly, his face carefully blank. Stephanie growled behind him, stomping closer to us.
"No, you won't. They're in love, they have been for years and you won't stop them."
Jake glanced over his shoulder at her, then back at me. "You should probably go now. We'll see each other again soon," he grinned at me again before leaning away from the car, allowing me to speed off.
Looking into my rearview mirror at the standoff between the most unusual pair of my life, I could tell something huge was going to affect all of us. And, for the sake of being melodramatic, it would change our lives forever.
_holding on to what I haven't got _
When I finally got up from my long nap, I barreled on through the stairs and dropped my laundry onto the bottom stair and snagged my laptop out from where I had stashed it, carrying it into the kitchen. I glanced at the corner of the screen for the date, and twisted my lips thoughtfully. Only eight more days in this place, and I had no idea how I felt about it. Shaking the thought away, I tended to my work and emailed an apology to all the canceled appointments. By the time my phone sprung to life beside me, I was a bit past annoyed, so much that I answered without looking at the caller ID, opting to continue on editing pictures and managing the wellbeing of my company's stock.
"Bella, we need to talk," Edward's voice flooded me with coldness and dread as I remembered vaguely running away from him.
"Um, do we really? I mean, I'm fine not talking and just doing my work, you know?" I mumbled, my attention fully diverted from the work in front of me now.
"Please, Bella," his voice melted, and I felt my heart speed up dangerously in my chest. How could I refuse when he said it like that?
"When?" I barely managed to choke out, feeling conflicted over this. I'm pretty sure I had been conned into this, somehow.
"Just come outside," he replied, and I glared at my phone, his words reassuring what I suspected. He had tricked me-, "I'm waiting."
My unconscious resolve to tell him to shove it up his ass was cut off as the line disconnected, leaving me listening to the dial tone in shock. Grumbling, I saved my work and powered off my laptop, already mentally complaining about how I was just never going to get any work done. I crossed the driveway to the passenger seat of his Aston Martin quickly, trying not to roll my eyes at his choice of car as I slid into the smooth leather seat.
Edward turned to me, giving me a crooked smile that left me breathless as he backed out of my street, and began the drive out of town. After the silence ensued for a good number of minutes, I looked over at him uneasily. Being trapped in a car with a guy you kissed and then ran away from is kind of awkward.
"What are you thinking of now?" he asked, a slight undertone of frustration coloring his tone. I pursed my lips, looking at his profile then back out my windshield.
"Why are you always asking me that? You act like it's this whole big thing that you can't tell what I'm thinking," I sighed, before looking at him through narrow eyes, "Why is that, I wonder?"
Edward glanced at me, the tension in his frame palpable even in his conflicted gaze and I knew he was making the decision right then whether or not to tell me the truth.
"You can trust me, you know," I murmured, leaning forward in my intensity. "Me of all people, you can trust. I may have been pretty reckless with just about any situation that came my way and that I pretty much lashed out on everybody around me but I've never felt this connected to someone, you know? I've never… been tied so closely to someone like this."
Edward shook his head, his eyes sliding back to the road in front of him, the car accelerating under his foot. "Don't say that, I'm much too dangerous. You should know that."
"You're not dangerous. You could have hurt me long before now if you were," I argued, settling back into my seat. "Besides, we are connected now. There's nothing either of us can do to change that."
"Connected," he scoffed, as the speedometer inched higher on the dashboard. "Where did all this connected ideology come from anyways?"
I shrugged, fiddling with my seat belt. "When I went back to school in Europe, I met some really interesting people and they had these theories, concepts really, about fate and people's destiny. It was like an epiphany really, I felt it in every nerve that this was what was right for me."
"An epiphany?" he asked skeptically as we sped into Port Angeles, "tell me more then."
"People that meet and instantly set off a strong emotion in one or the other will always from then on be like a permanent fixture in their lives," I continued, feeling slightly self conscious, "Like with you and me. When we met, I kind of really disliked you. Years later, we're still around each other. And you were basically the only stable thing for me throughout all those years."
He stayed silent after that, and I found myself pouring over everything I say in case I offended him. When we finally reached our destination, it was dark outside, and getting colder by the minute. Stepping outside, goose bumps erupted across my skin as I shivered, clutching my arms to keep the little warmth I had. We were across the street from an Italian restaurant called La Bella Italia, which from our spot on the lightless curb looked like the sun. I frowned as Edward slammed his car door shut, at the same time a group of older, drunken men stumbled their way down the sidewalk leering at me.
"Well, hello there sugar," one man called out, eyeing my body hungrily and elbowing a friend of his. "Why don't you ditch the rich kid and get down and dirty with me?"
His friends roared with laughter, doubling over in mirth as one of them fell to the cement clutching his stomach. Edward snatched my elbow, practically hauling me across the street and in front of the restaurant where he let me go. His jaw was clenched, and his eyes were deep black fire that lit my body up in a scorching haze of fire that had my toes curling in my shoes.
"Honestly, that was nothing. They were just joking around, I get it all the time," I insisted, looking up to scrutinize his face some more. The black fire still hadn't died out, but blazed even more brightly as he raised an eyebrow at me and yanked open the front door.
"Humor me."
Rolling my eyes at his behavior, I walked past him and greeted the host, finally securing a booth in a private empty corner of the restaurant. He sat still in his chair, looking intently at me as his anger died out. Our server arrived, flipping a strand of short black hair behind one ear and smiled with excessive warmth.
"Hello. My name is Amber, and I'll be your server tonight. What can I get you to drink?" She leaned towards him, ignoring my existence. Biting my tongue, I shifted my hand so that the fork would clash against the side of the plate, holding back a smirk as Amber jumped up in surprise.
"I'll have a Coke," I said innocently, looking her steadily in the eye.
"Two Cokes," Edward added.
"I'll be right back with that," she assured him with a flirtatious smile, throwing me a disgusted look over her shoulder, as Edward took no notice of her. He was looking at me.
"What?" I demanded, fidgeting with the cloth napkin in my lap.
"For a minute, you were acting like the Bella I first met again," he said indifferently and I shrugged in response.
"I've always been very good at maintaining myself."
"I'm glad, it would have been a shame if someone with your character had just been muted," his face twisted up into that perfect crooked smile before chuckling at my puzzled expression.
I shivered slightly as the server came back with the drinks, taking a long gulp of my Coke. I hadn't realized I had been so thirsty.
"Are you cold?"
"It's just the Coke," I shook my head, explaining even as another shudder racked through my body.
Wordlessly, he handed me his own jacket, leaving him in only an ivory turtleneck that outlined his muscular chest. Admiring him, I slipped his jacket on, the material as cold as if it had never been worn making me shiver yet again, even as the most delicious scent infiltrated my senses. It took all my concentration to prevent myself from getting dizzy off it.
"As much as I hate to admit, those monsters did have something right, Edward spoke ,his long white hand pushing the second Coke over to me as I unconsciously finished the first, "you do look beautiful tonight. That color blue looks lovely with your skin."
Surprised, I looked down, flushing as I did. When I had woken up today, I had assumed I would spend the day working and had dressed in a deep royal blue short sleeved shirt that draped to mid thigh and a pair of faded straight cut jeans.
He pushed the breadbasket towards me.
"I'm not hungry," I grumbled again, keeping my eyes fixed on the table cloth. /he sighed across from me.
"Are you ready to order?" Amber asked Edward, I glanced at her interruption but said nothing. He shook his head, gesturing towards me.
"Mushroom ravioli," I muttered, picking out the first thing I saw on the menu. She left immediately after, dissatisfied with the lack of acknowledgement from Edward.
"You kissed me."
I nearly spit out my Coke, but kept my composure. "I had almost forgotten that was why you brought me here."
He glared at me, drumming his fingers on the tabletop. "Just answer the question."
Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, I raised an eyebrow at him before pursing my lips. "I'll tell you in the car. But I have some conditions."
"Don't you always?" He said sardonically, leaning closer to me across the table.
"Just a few questions," I reasoned with him s I took another sip of my Coke. He stared at me expectantly.
"Okay, let's say there's this person," I hesitated, thinking of how I was going to word this impossible thought, "Who could read minds –with a few exceptions."
"Just one exception," he corrected.
"All right, with one exception then." I was thrilled that he was playing along but I tried to seem nonchalant. "How does that work?"
He eyed me once, and then his lips quirked up into the crooked smile again. "It's a little like being in a huge hall filled with people, everyone talking at once. Until I focus on one voice, and then what they're thinking is clear. Most of the time, I tune it all out –it can be very distracting."
"And you can't hear me?"
"No, which is why you managed to kiss me," he said, his voice hard.
Whoops.