- temps -

Without fail, it will always pass. And things will continually change with its passing.

Armin became the town recluse. He never left his property. Not for a festival, not for a funeral, not even to get himself some groceries. Townsfolk speculated about what he did in that house of his, some theorizing that he was working on a way to resurrect the dead, some sneering that he probably spent his days staring at a wall. But no more came of it. They could only speculate, after all.

Levi closed the bakery, and the Braus family opened one of their own. He spent most of his time in the woods. Most thought he hunted and fished and sold his goods in another town. If they'd bothered to take a closer look, they might have realized that he was searching for his lost ward. That he had no money, and he lived off of Carla and Grisha Jaeger's charity. That he was restless, obsessed with finding the last other Ackerman alive. That he would stop at nothing to bring her back.

Eren didn't quit his family's business, if only for his parents' sake. But he did tag along on Levi's late-night trips into the woods. He, too, was restless, and desperate to find her. He, too, would stop at nothing to bring her back.

This fact didn't change, even as everything else did. Years passed, and Levi's skin began to wrinkle, and Armin grew thinner, and Eren's face lost all traces of baby fat. But he still had dreams where she was soaked in blood, running from him as though he were the most terrifying thing she'd seen in her life. He still heard her voice in his head, memories drifting back to distract him every so often. He could still see the silly, romantic little vision he'd obsessed over the spring she left, where her lips were red and her smile was bright and they stood together at the altar.

Eren's springtime may have been long gone, but he hadn't wilted. Not yet.

- après tout ce temps -

Armin Arlert II was twenty-three years old when he finally left his property and made his way through the woods to see his best and only friend, Eren Jaeger.

He found him bundling wood, crouched down, humming a little song to himself. Armin, for the first time in a long time, found himself smiling.

"Eren!" he exclaimed.

Eren fell over with a shout that sent the birds above flying. And then he was gaping, dumbfounded, at the pale, spindly man before him. He marveled at his terribly messy hair, which came down to his waist, even in a ponytail, and was startled by his bright, stark blue eyes.

"...Ar…Armin?"

Armin offered him a hand. "In the flesh, believe it or not," he piped.

Eren took his hand and helped himself up. "God, how long has it been?" he exhaled, scanning him over. "How the hell are you out of your house?"

Armin's smile widened. "Redundant as it might be to say so, that's why I'm out of my house. You see, I have an idea, Eren."

An eyebrow was lifted. "An idea?"

Armin nodded. "Yes- well- more of a proposal, really. You see, I was reading one of my grandfather's old books for the millionth time- you should see my annotations, they're such a mess- and then, out of nowhere, it dawned on me: we should go west!" He paused, splaying out his hands for emphasis. Eren's brow scrunched.

"...West," he repeated flatly, incredulously.

"Mm-hm! West!"

Eren pushed his sleeves up, noting how cold the weather had been turning as of late.

"And what makes you think this is such a great idea?"

Armin practically bounced where he stood. "Oh, I was hoping you'd ask! So in the book I was reading- it was actually a list of biographies of my ancestors, and I was reading it because I remembered my grandfather reading it to me when I was very young, but he'd never finished it- it said that the Arlert family originally came from Queen Rose's country, west of Queen Maria's country, and that- at least in the biography of my great-great-great aunt, now deceased, bless her- they still lived there! Do you know what this means, Eren?"

He frowned. "You want to trek all to way to Rose's country? On the slight chance you may have family there?"

Armin shook his head. "No, Eren, you don't get it. Don't you remember what my parents said when they left in that silly hot air balloon of theirs? They said they were going to see the world, didn't they?"

Eren's frown deepened. "Yes...but what does that have to d-"

"Eren, they haven't returned in eighteen years."

"Armin, they're dead."

Armin pointed a stern finger at his friend. "Presumably. But they went west when they left. They wanted to start by seeing all three parts of our land, from Maria to Sina. What if they decided they couldn't cross the ocean in their balloon? It's not like my family was rich or the like; there's no possible way they might have afforded a boat. When they left, they were giddy, Eren, excitable, and young, close to our age. It's entirely possible they miscalculated, and went back to Rose's country to live with the rest of our family to save themselves the embarrassment of admitting to my grandfather that they'd made a mistake."

Eren's face wrinkled. "You really think they'd be that stupid?"

Armin laughed. "I know so, Eren! I'm the same way! Prideful, arrogant, cowardly. It's so in character!"

"What about you? You don't think they'd at least find a way to get you back?"

The town recluse scoffed. "Pardon my French, Eren, but my parents didn't give two shits about me. Even before they'd decided to leave, they treated me more like an experiment or a plaything than their child. They gave me reading assignments, rather than bedtime stories. When I asked for a hug, or to sleep in their bed because I'd had a nightmare, or to sit on my father's shoulders or in my mother's lap, you know what I got? A stern look from my father, and even less from my mother. My grandfather had to parent me, even when my own parents were in the same room. It'd be less than surprising to find they completely abandoned me to save their own pride."

"Then why even look for them?" the woodsman exhaled, frustrated. "What's it going to add up to?"

Armin's rather sardonic guise slipped. His eyes grew sharp, and they cut right into Eren.

"Why do you and Mr. Levi still search restlessly for Mikasa? I hear you two every night, calling to one another. I see the light of your lanterns out my window. Every single night. Why? If it's been five years, why? If she left by her own choice, why? Why do you still look for her?"

Eren dropped his axe and moved forward in one swift, heated motion. Before Armin knew it, he was on the ground, staring at his best friend, his tailbone aching where it had hit the earth, shirt ruffled where callused hands had shoved him.

Still, he pressed further.

"Why do you do it, Eren? Use your words. Tell me. Why?"

"You know why!" Eren exclaimed, his face reddening.

Armin's eyes narrowed. "Do I, now?"

"You do! Don't pull this on me, Armin, I don't have the-"

"Yes you do! Say it! Tell me, Eren, why you're so hung up on a lost cause! Tell me, you coward!"

Both of their faces had turned bright red. A muscle in Eren's jaw twitched. Armin's breathing had become labored.

A chilly gust of wind brushed through their path. Eren rubbed his arms, his face softening, and sat down.

Armin did not relent.

"You still love her, don't you?"

Eren stared at his hands.

His friend leaned forward. "Even though she ran away from you. Even though so much time has passed. Even though you may not even know who she is anymore, or if she feels the same way, you love her. And that's why you can never give up, right? That's why you're so goddamn restless, why you scour the woods obsessively, hoping to at least find some trace of her. You can't help yourself, can you?"

"Shut up," Eren muttered. "You don't know anything."

Armin pounded his fist against his thigh. "No, Eren, I know everything. Five years of my parents' disaffected stares, then eighteen of their absence. Alive or not, they left me by choice. Me and my grandfather. Then he dies. Now I'm alone. It's all their fault. But, insanely enough, after all this time, all I want is to-"

His voice thickened. His eyes welled up.

Swimming blues clung to the ground, tears blurring his vision.

"All I want now, Eren, is to see them again. I'd give anything just to show my father how tall I've gotten, to show my mother how intelligent I am, to hear them say my name, to talk about whom I look the most like. Because, even after everything they've done to me, I still love them. And I still need them. Pathetic as it may be, I do. I'd trek all the way to Rose's country on the slight chance they might be there, just as you would search every night after a long day's work on the slight chance you might find some sort of clue she left behind.

"Do you get it, now, Eren? Do you understand why we need to go west?"

Eren met his gaze. His best friend's eyes were red.

"Why do you need me to come along?" he asked, frowning.

Armin smiled, and it was the smile of the boy who couldn't swim, the boy who needed his friends to keep Jean Kirschtein from taking advantage of him, the boy who ran into passerby because his nose was in a book, the one Eren had known for so long before he'd left to pursue his future.

"I can't do very many things without you by my side," he admitted. "You should've figured as much by now."

Slowly, Eren felt himself smile back. He stood again, offering his hand. Armin took it and helped himself up, dusting off his tea-stained slacks.

"Funny thing," Eren said, turning to gather his bundle again, "I always thought it was the other way around."

Armin laughed, crouching to take his axe for him. "Then you'll come along?"

Eren tousled his hair, the dirt from his hands mixing with the tangled mess. "I think I've missed you too much already to say 'no'. Now, let's head back to your place."

"My place? But what about your-"

"The wood'll be fine. We need to fix you up before anyone else can witness this monstrosity."

c'est l'amour, c'est la mort -

"You're doing what?!"

Carla's voice nearly cracked, it rang so high.

Her son flinched, not meeting her eyes, no longer touching his food. "We're going west," he repeated, "to Rose's country."

Carla shook her head adamantly. "No. Winter is coming all too soon, and poor Armin just left his house for the first time in years, he must be so weak-"

"I am perfectly fine, Mrs. Jaeger," Armin assured her. "As a matter of fact, this is my idea."

Carla blinked at him, baffled. "But you'll catch your death of cold out there! I understand you're the man of your household, Armin, but I absolutely cannot allow you to hike all the way to Rose's country with the state you're in, even with Eren's help. You both could get hurt out there, and I can't bear the idea of losing either of you, especially with Mikasa-"

"Mom," Eren interrupted. He leaned forward and took her hand. "We'll be fine."

She curled her lips pensively, her eyebrows knitted in distress.

Her son cupped her cheek with his hand, brushing away strands of her hair from her face. "Mom, we'll be fine," he repeated.

She sighed, leaning into his touch. "How do you manage to look so much like your father?"

Eren grinned. "Someone's got to keep you calm when he works late."

She tried not to grin back, instead dropping her gaze to her bowl. "Lord, I remember when you were my spitting image, with your chubby cheeks and your enormous eyes. I had to hold your hand when you walked. And now, you're leaving the country…"

Eren's hand dropped. "It's not forever," he assured her. "I swear, Mom, I'll be back. I'll come back in one piece, no matter what it takes."

She kissed him on the cheek, ruffling his hair. "Alright, sweetheart. I believe you. But you." She turned to Armin, who started, his spoon clattering back into his bowl.

"M-ma'am?" he stammered.

"One cut," she warned, "One smudge on your pretty face, and you'll be hearing it from me. Is that clear?"

Armin daren't snort. "Yes'm," he answered.

Carla's smile returned. "Come here," she invited, opening her arms. Obediently, Armin rose to meet them. She stroked the ends of his hair and chuckled.

"How on earth did it get so long?" she wondered quietly. "And when did you get so tall?"

"Time flies, doesn't it?" Armin smirked.

She sighed a long, sad sigh."Unfortunately so. But such is life. And such is death."

Though Eren's father was little more than surprised with the boys' decision, Levi was about ready to throw a fit.

The old bakery was chilly, and smelled of smoke. A cold, forgotten cup of tea sat on the worn coffee table. Levi's eyes had bags beneath them. His gaze was sharp.

"You're telling me," he said, "that you're just going to disappear? To another fucking country? For the hell of it?"

"To help Armin find his family," Eren protested. "Not for fun."

Levi glowered at him. "What about Mikasa?"

"I'll be back," Eren assured him, "and then we'll keep looking for her. You usually do most of the work, anyway."

"What if you get hurt? Who's gonna save you?"

Eren scoffed. "Please, Levi. I can handle myself."

"Whatever happened to the 'mister'?"

The younger of the two gave the older a funny look. "I stopped calling you 'mister' when you decided I was old enough to drink with you."

Levi's eyes blazed. "Maybe I don't think so, anymore. You're still just a kid. Maybe you should just stick to chopping wood, and stop helping me look for Mikasa, and wait until you're actually grown to pull shit like this."

Eren stood. "Look, I'm not asking for your permission. I just wanted to tell you. That's the polite thing to do. If you're going to throw a tantrum about it, I'm out of here."

"Eren, you're just a kid-"

"Oh, am I? I suppose you were just a kid when you ran away from your uncle, or even before that, when you helped him kill people! I guess you were too young for any of that to really have happened, right? It was all made up? You were just telling me fairy tales the night you spilled all that shit out on me? Is that how it is?"

Levi stood, too. Despite being nearly a foot shorter than his younger partner, he emanated venom and intimidation. Eren tried his best not to shrink backward.

"Just because life shat all over me when I was your age doesn't mean you have to tempt it to do the same to you," Levi hissed, his words heated and scathing. "Do you know how many people I've lost in this life, boy? Do you have any idea how much it hurts? My mother, my disgusting uncle, Mikasa's parents, and now her! Are you going to do the same to me? You and Arlert? Are you two really so goddamn selfish to leave me when everyone else already has?"

Levi's entire body sagged. He sat back down onto the sofa, exhaling, his head in his hands.

Eren blinked at him in astonishment.

"Levi, I-"

"Shut the hell up," he murmured. "Forget what I said. Go on your stupid trip. I don't give a fuck. I'm too tired to give a fuck."

There was a moment of silence.

Levi heard a clicking sound.

Of course. The latch of a door. It was a noise he was so familiar with, the silent tune of wordless goodbyes. He sunk lower into himself, seething. Being accustomed to losing people didn't make it any easier to bear.

Then something began to roar.

He started, snapping his eyes toward the kitchen. Eren had pulled out a kettle and started a fire in the oven.

Levi's brow scrunched. "Jaeger, what do you think you're doing?"

"Making us some tea," Eren answered simply. "Your cup was cold, right?"

Levi suppressed a smile, trying his best to appear as gruff as usual. "Don't you have to get ready for your trip?"

Eren shrugged. "We're not leaving for a few days. Right now, I'd just like to chat with you. If that's alright."

"I don't see a problem with it," Levi murmured.

In his voice, Eren could detect the slightest of smiles, the subtlest of hopes. He was his companion, his friend. And he only wished him the best; he knew that. He'd seen him grow, seen him learn, seen him lose and seek what had been taken from him- from them. They'd been partners for years, finding solace in the traces of Mikasa that reflected through the cracked, murky shards of their beings that her disappearance left behind. Opposites in many ways, in one thing they were equal: both loved, and had lost, the girl in the red riding hood.

"While you're at it," Levi groaned, shifting in his seat, "grab some liqueur from the cellar."

Eren didn't bother to hide his smirk. "Only if you're sharing."

Levi caught the expression, and didn't fail to return it.

"Don't I always?"

That evening, Eren didn't join Levi in their regular search. Carla insisted he and Armin both get enough rest, prohibiting Armin from returning to his own house for the same reason.

"There's nothing but woods for a few days," she warned them. "Some nights, you may not have the luxury of sleep. Stock up on it while you can."

When Eren protested, Grisha gave him a tired look.

"Listen to your mother," he said simply. Eren pouted the rest of the night, because that was that.

"I'm moving out as soon as we get back," he told Armin after his mother had scolded him for burning candle light. "I'm too old for this."

Armin simply hummed in agreement, because he could not relate.

What he'd give to be in Eren's shoes. To have a mother fuss over him, a father to chat with about work and adulthood, an older brother figure like Levi to spend his time with.

Even the attention he was getting at the moment, secondhand as it was, was heaven to him. He felt almost happy again.

- bon voyage -

The next few days were a blur. Eren and Armin woke early and planned furiously, hiking back to the latter's house for plans he'd made previously, as well as maps and research.

Both poured about half of their life's savings into their supplies. The townsfolk, if they hadn't already been shocked by Armin's presence, were definitely stunned when they saw the amount of supplies the boys were stocking up.

"Holy cow," Sasha Braus gasped, clapping her hands over her mouth. "Is that you, Armin? It's so good to see you! My god, your hair's grown so long! And you boys want…..how many traps?!"

"Whoa!!" Connie Springer exclaimed, nearly dropping the bundles of crops on his shoulders. "Armin Arlert and Eren Jaeger?! Here?! Where the hell have you two been?"

Eren blinked at him. "Connie, I just saw you last week," he reminded him. "For lunch? Remember?"

Connie's ears reddened. "Oh- yeah. Sorry, I forget you're not Jean sometimes. But you! Armin, what happened to you?!"

They wouldn't have run into Jean Kirschtein if he hadn't spotted them outside his window and dashed outside himself.

"Armin!" he yelled, "Eren! Wait!"

The two stopped, turning to him, startled.

"We're kinda in a hurry, Jean," Eren said, pressure in his tone.

Jean waved at him dismissively. "No. Shut up. I need to tell you something, Armin."

Armin frowned at his old friend, unpleasant memories bubbling back to the surface of his mind.

"What is it?" he asked, his voice tight.

"I'm-" He sighed. "I'm sorry. For overstepping. I should've known better."

Armin gave him a smile in return. It didn't reach his eyes.

"I'm the one who should be apologizing," he said quietly. "It was childish of me to take out my misery on you. You were just doing what any good friend might do."

A relieved grin spread across Jean's lips. "Can I see you for lunch tomorrow?" he asked, the hope in his voice all too prominent. "I have so much I want to tell you about. It's been too long since we've talked."

Armin's smile fell. "I wish I could, but Eren and I are about to leave for a trip. A rather long one."

Jean rubbed his chilled knuckles. "How long is long?"

Armin glanced at Eren, who gave him a light shrug.

"Maybe a year or so," he said, and his voice was close to a whisper.

Jean took a deep breath through his nose, nodding somberly.

"When you come back, then," he said. "For sure."

Armin put a hand on his shoulder, offering another smile, this one more genuine.

"Of course," he told him. "It's definitely been too long."

Jean gave him his old smirk in return.

"Cut your hair while you're gone," he said teasingly. "You're going to make women jealous."

Armin chuckled, rolling his eyes, and waved good-bye. He and Eren continued on their way.

Jean watched their retreating backs before hurrying back inside to check on his mother. It was getting cold out, he'd realized. This wouldn't do her health any good.

The morning of their departure, Eren and Armin scarfed down the breakfast Carla had prepared for them. She and Grisha both tried their best to make light conversation at the table, despite the fact that neither of them were eating. It was for naught, as the boys were eating too quickly to have much time for chatter.

Once they'd cleaned their plates and dropped them into the washtub, Eren and Armin planted a kiss each on Carla's forehead, and then accepted an awkward, but sincere hug from Grisha.

The boys left before sunrise, heavy knapsacks slung over their shoulders.

- end part three -

AN: Part three of five. I hope you all enjoyed this segment. A special thanks to Nat, AGAIN, for helping me with this story bc holy shit this would've been nothing without her help.

Please reblog, comment, and/or review (in AO3 or )!