Chapter 32: Reawakening
She kept peeking over in his direction whenever she thought he wasn't looking, his demeanor stoic as they walked to Hojo's family shrine. I have no idea what he's been through. It was the truth, but why was she just now entertaining the notion that he was deeply hurt when she decided to run away from all of it? Because he broke our promise. A promise she had been informed of but did not fully remember. If what she saw in their shared vision was true, then it was indeed her own fault that she couldn't talk to him like an old friend, but instead be forced to discuss the past as though he were a parent retelling stories to a child.
The walk through the Hojo Shrine grounds was slow, Sesshomaru naturally leading while the rest his pack followed behind. Kagome, however, walked directly next to him, her eyes continuously turning in his direction which he caught once in awhile with an agitated look of his own. After a particularly long glance, the Inu Youkai at last had enough, and asked in a low voice so that only she could hear, "Why do you keep staring at me?"
His voice caused her to snap out of her trance. "Huh?" Shaking her head to clear her mind, Kagome blushed and quickly tried to explain, "I'm sorry. I'm just thinking is all…."
"And that requires you to constantly look at me?" He commented, his gaze remaining straight ahead.
"No….Its just….I'm sorry."
He frowned. "What for?"
"For everything…."
Stopping in his steps Sesshomaru turned his head to look at her. "Kagome, what…."
"Abigail!" Hojo called out, rushing towards the group. Stopping just in front of his boss, the cheerful looking man greeted them all. "You're right on time!"
"Yes, of course, we are Hojo…," Kagome replied to him, still keeping her eyes on Sesshomaru. "I hope you don't mind that three more people are joining us."
"Ah…." Deliberating the human man looked over his boss's group, his gaze locking onto a disguised Sesshomaru the longest. Abigail seemed so interested in him. A bit dejectedly Hojo reeled in his emotions and assured her with a professional tone, "It's quite all right Abigail, father won't mind a few more faces for New Year's, after all, it is our biggest festival of the year!" Forcing a smile, the architect assistant gestured for them to follow him to the building that served as the shrine where the dangerous pages were contained. "Because of the rumors, this shrine isn't normally open to the public, but father made an exception," Hojo said in response to the group's curious glances at the large latch on the outside of the shrine.
Taking a large brass key from the sleeve of his monk robes, the tension in the air was heavy while Hojo unlocked and opened the door to the shrine's interior, the group equally silent when Kagome's assistant lead them inside and towards the back of the square building. Two more doors were slid open without the need of a key, and reaching the last one between them and the pages, the demoness's breath hitched in her throat. The final door was heavily covered in sacred sutras, a large golden lock with an inscribed prayer being what kept undeserving persons from entering.
Hojo dutifully recited the history of this particular sanctum."The pages are said to have been written by an unknown man while he was possessed by an evil spirit from hell," Taking a moment to remember the tale he clarified one important detail, "The pages encased here were apparently a part of an entire book at some point, but the full texts location has been lost for centuries." Saying a quick prayer under his breath, the human man slowly unlocked the bolt on the door, pulling it out and carefully placing it on the floor next to him. Almost talking to himself, he continued to disclose what information he knew about the writings, "Father already prayed over them today to keep the forces at bay….but one can never be too cautious with these things…."
"Cautious about what things?" Inuyasha asked from his position behind Sesshomaru and Kagome.
"Youkai, Toshi-sama," Hojo said softly. "They are a fearsome bunch."
"Really?" Sesshomaru absently answered, his voice devoid of emotion. "You believe Youkai to be fearsome?," Glancing over at Kagome as he spoke, he frowned at the woman who seemed to be lost in thought.
"Of course," The naive man responding, sounding resolute. "I was raised in a shrine. I've learned the names of almost all the demonic beings in the world, though most were wiped out hundreds of years ago."
"Keh. He wishes." Inuyasha muttered out, to which he was quickly silenced by Kikyo nudging him in the ribs.
Sweeping his hand out in an invitation for them to enter the room, Hojo bowed and simpered, "If it's all the same to you, I'd prefer to wait outside while you look around."
Ume scoffed at his request. "You aren't scared are you?" Offering Hojo a grin, her smile grew when his eyes shifted and body shook. "You're really afraid of a little piece of paper?"
"There are three actually…." He said so low, he was sure nobody heard him.
"And you're afraid of them?"
"It is not that simple."
Ignoring him, the excited child began to chant. "Scaredy cat! Scaredy cat! Hojo is a Scaredy cat!"
"Ume that's enough." Kikyo chided softly. "Leave him alone."
"But Mama…." She began to whine, until a glare and a raised fist from her father made her close her mouth.
"Mama," Kaede suddenly said, grabbing a hold of her mother's coat sleeve. Her brown eyes growing wide as her premonitions began to take over. "It's happening again."
"Kaede….."
Inuyasha looked at the young woman, worried. "Kaede, again?" He knew his first child was prone to mind reading, but even so the fact that it caused her pain left a bad feeling inside his gut.
Kikyo urged her to focus. "What do you see?" She had been teaching her to control the visions and not let them control her. "Relax and concentrate on what's happening around you."
Taking a step over the threshold into the room, Kaede fought back tears, the drumming in her head worsening the closer she got to the source. "It's Kagome-san….she's remembering…."
"Remembering?" Kikyo's face downturned, "You mean her memory is being fully restored?"
"Wait a minute," Inuyasha looked around a moment. "Where is she?"
Noticing the glaring absences, the group also noted that Hojo and Sesshomaru were missing as well. The human was most likely outside, but it wasn't until the four looked past Kaede that they discovered the two Inu in front of the glass case which held the pages. Narrowing his eyes a bit, at first not believing what he was seeing, Inuyasha openly gaped at seeing what Kagome and his brother were doing. "What the…."
Hojo muttered something about preferring to wait outside, but Kagome didn't hear him over the roar of her instincts that was alerting her of…..something. Captivated, she crossed the threshold into the room, the glass case that held the item they had waited so long to see almost calling to her.
The display was simple enough, a wooden platform held the pages at an angle in the center of the room, protected by the clear glass that still allowed one to see what was contained within. Approaching it slowly the demoness noted that even more sutras covered the sides of the box, atoning to the fact that Hojo's family wasn't taking any chances.
In a dreamlike trance, Kagome, at last, was face to face with the pages of Kokumajutsu and peering down into the case blinked a few times to clear her vision once the writings on each of the three pieces of parchment began to shift and change into something she could barely read. Grimacing, she tried staring at the pages harder, the words running together on the once readable paper. "What's happening, I can't,"
"It is the security measure." Sesshomaru disclosed from his sudden place beside her, startling her out of her reverie. "The magic is making you unable to read it."
"Then what do I do?" She nearly whined at him, wanting, no needing his guidance. Stepping away from the case, she desperately grabbed at his hand, her body feeling weak with the power that buzzed through her.
Squeezing her hand to assure her she was secure, Sesshomaru pulled her back to the display. "What you did many times before," He answered, using his own larger paw to place hers flat onto the glass of the case. "Fight through it."
"But how?"
"The book of Kokumajutsu only considered those with blacked hearts as worthy enough to read it." Coming to a stand behind her, Sesshomaru used his free arm moving to wrap around her waist. "In order for the spell to grant you access…." He trailed off, leaving the rest for the demoness in his arms to answer.
"In order for the spell to grant me access…..I have to become black hearted….." Kagome choked out, her tears threatening to spill over. Swallowing the lump in her throat, the demoness took deep breaths, her head becoming lighter with each gasp of air. "I can't…." She managed to get out in between her deep breathing. She wasn't a cold person. If she had been that way in the past then she wanted nothing to do with her former self in the present.
Why was she even doing this? Grabbing Sesshomaru's arm around her waist, she tried to pry him off of her body. She needed to get away from here, out of Hiroshima, out of Japan. There were hundreds of other countries that she could make a home. Actively struggling in his grasp, the demon's arms only held her tighter, refusing to let her run away. "Sesshomaru please….." Her hand started to burn, the scar aggravating her palm and making her heartbeat race. "Let me go." She quietly pleaded with him, her mind turning into a blur.
"No Kagome." He muttered in her ear. "No more running, for either of us," Offering a quiet noise of comfort, Sesshomaru lightly bit the side of her neck in an act to show her that she was his.
"Everything I did…." Closing her eyes as the various proof of her transgressions ran through her mind, Kagome openly whined, not caring that her true self-was being exposed. "I caused a family to die…"
"And adopting that idea is how you overcame the corruption."
"What?" Spinning her around so that she could look at him fully, Sesshomaru removed the covering spell from his body, his golden eyes bared behind his glasses. Holding her face in her hands, his thumb absently traced the marking under her left eye, making Kagome realize that in her disheveled state she had allowed her own human disguise to fall. "I'm a monster…"
Hearing the word monster, Sesshomaru pupils dilated, the sclera becoming laced with red. "Kagome, I will only say this once more," keeping her gaze directed at him, the dog demon stared her straight in the eye. "Rin's death was not your fault, there was nothing you could have done to foretell what Onigumo would do to his family, his own blood."
"Sesshomaru…."
"I forbid you many years ago to refer to yourself as a monster, or black-hearted, or any other derogatory term that you tried to call yourself." He continued on, ignoring her interruption. "But even that couldn't stop you once…."
Her cerulean eyes grew noticeably larger at his admittance. In the recesses of her mind, she felt something trying to break through, Sesshomaru's words being what made the shield weaker that covered the haze. She just needed a little more. Encouraging him to go on, Kagome gave him her full attention. She was listening….at long last. "What couldn't you stop me from Sesshomaru…."
Baring his fangs, the dog demon pressed his forehead against hers, his ruminating reaching migraine inducing levels. "I couldn't stop you from seeing death as a personal failing." He finally revealed, moving his arms down to hold her in a tight embrace. Feeling Kagome violently jerk and groan, Sesshomaru pulled her away from him to looking back in her eyes that seemed….clearer than ever before. Hoping that he wasn't seeing things, the dog demon dared to ask, "Kagome…..do you…."
Her face looked exhausted but, she nodded in answer. "Yes…."
"You finally remember." He said, appearing relieved.
The Inu demons held each other even tighter, the two former lovers momentarily forgetting their problems, their instincts instead concentrating on finally being reunited.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed this installment, next chapter will be much longer than the last two chapters I posted, mostly because with Kagome's memory finally back, a lot of things can finally be covered that weren't before. Yes, the two are going to have a talk about Miyako and his arranged marriage, but they've got bigger fish to fry. Hope you enjoyed and please review if you did! -Theores