this is morning:
it's when i spend the most time
thinking bout what Iive given up.
this is a warning:
when you start the day just to close the curtains
you're thinking 'bout what Iive given up...
i read your letter
the one you left when you broke into my house
retracing every step you made.
and you said you meant it
and there's a piece of me in every single
second of every single day.
but if it's true then tell me how it got this way...

Morning light came shining through my eyelids, which I simply refused to open. I instead turned up my other senses, trying to decide if I still had a queen in my bed. I could smell nothing but morning dew mixing with the leftover aromas of last night's escapades. But the sound of gentle breathing that was no my own came to my ears. So she'd stayed as she'd promised. She felt no awkwardness the morning after, as I so often did. I considered reaching out a paw to touch her, stroke her arm, r caress her face, but I didn't for fear that she was already awake and would catch me. So instead opened my eyes just a crack to see her. She was facing away from me, laying on her side. Her body expanded and shrank as she breathed, slow and even. This was peace, this was happiness, just laying here and watching her sleep. After a few minutes of sleepy contemplation, I started to run a paw gently from her neck to her ass and back up again. She twitched and a small noise escaped her, but she did not wake. She was warm because the sun shone straight down on her form through the left and rear windows. I was cool, as I was just beyond the sunbeam's reach, so I inched closer to her, pressing my front against her back from shoulders to feet. She pressed lightly back against me, and I wrapped one arm around her waist and the other across her chest. I left a long kiss on her neck before nuzzling into her shoulder and allowing my eyes to close. I could stand to sleep a little longer. I didn't know if I'd fallen asleep or not, so either an hour passed, or only a minute, but Bombalurina started to move. I kept my eyes closed, but loosened my arms as she sat up. I heard her sign as she stretched and I heard a yawn as well. She nudged my shoulder gently.
"Tugger?" she barely whispered. She obviously didn't want me awake that badly. I heard nothing for a few moments, and then, in an action that startled me so much that I almost opened my eyes, she pressed her lips to my "sleeping" ones. She allowed herself to remain there, not moving, just contacting for I don't know how long. I didn't mind it at all. She was really a sweet queen, all alone and comfortable like this. I wondered why she spent all of her time around the tribe acting so holier than now, when in reality she wanted a sweet, quiet romance more than anything.
I should ask myself the same question.
She and I were just the same in that respect. It was such a cover up. But who had I been hiding my emotions from? What did I have to hide? More importantly, what did she have to hide? I'd be a fool to tell myself that I knew everything there was to know about Bombalurina the Scarlett Goddess, But I felt like her disguise was off around me, and that fact made me crave her that much more. I remained unloving for the sole reason of finding out what she would do next. I don't know what I was expecting her to do, but I wanted to give her the chance to make a decision thinking she was alone. "Fine. Sleep then you big oaf." Ouch. "Well…cute oaf." Okay fine. I heard her shuffling around a little, and then I heard nothing at all. Did she leave? I opened my eyes and sat up slowly. No, she hadn't left; she'd curled up on the driver's-seat, staring out the driver's-side window at a group of kits playing nearby. I gave her maybe another minute before crawling into the front seat. She smiled at me.
"Hey" she said sweetly.
"Hey. Move over a little." She lifted herself off of the seat and allowed me to slide in under her before she took a comfortable perch on my lap. I wrapped my arms around her and played with her paws while leaving small kisses on her face and neck, earning a purr from her throat. And we spent some time just sitting there, both of our attentions devoted to the kittens nearby. I registered that Etcetera was among them, but I didn't think it was important until Bomba spoke.
"Are you looking at her Tugger?"
"Not specifically." I tried to sound as not caring as possible, but when Bomba mentioned Etci, I turned my attention towards her. She sat watching, rather than playing. She'd lost a lot of weight to the point where she looked almost sickly. Her eyes were dull, and that only added to the effect of looking a dead cat walking. It made me sad to think that this was partially my fault; that she was stuck in perpetual kitten-dom. I wondered if I could ask Bomba to each out to her, now that jealousy could not be an issue. But now was not the time.
"Was I better than her?" asked Bomba.
"What?" my reply sounded more surprised than I actually was.
"Was I better than Etcetera?" she asked again, a certain urgency now apparent in her voice. I shook my head.
"You can't be serious about this."
"Tugger I am!" she placed a paw on my face, forcing me to look at her. "I want to know who you liked better, who you'd rather be with If you had to choose. Now who was better: Etci or me?" she was looking so desperately into my eyes. It was obvious she didn't trust her own beauty and…unique talents. I cared a little about Etcetera, this was true enough, but not in the way that I was starting to care about Bombalurina. So I placed my paw on her cheek, returning her gaze, and gave her the most sincere voice my throat possessed.
"Etci who?" and that seemed to satisfy her, at least I should assume from her reaction. She not only allowed my full out assault on her lips, she encouraged it with tricks and touches she hadn't used last night. I was in the middle of thinking "Oh, really? Again? Now?" when she stopped abruptly.
"Tugger! TUGGER!" Munkustrap came bounding into the car, grinning from ear to ear. "Tugger come quick! You'll miss it!" he stopped when he noticed that Bombalurina was still here. His smile, if possible, got even bigger. "It's not like that, eh Tugger? Of course it isn't. What was I thinking?" His attention shifted to the queen I had straddling me, and shook his head in a mixture of amusement and disbelief. "Bomba, I have got to ask…is he really THAT good?" I had to laugh. Bomba had trouble not laughing, but she smirked and shrugged, shifting her hips down and forward. I let out a completely involuntary pleasure gasp, and her claws dug into my left leg. The pain forced my thighs to buck up, hitting her in the ass and just pressing her that much closer to me. She put her lips directly in front of mine and whispered right into my mouth.
"Shhhh Kitty. Control yourself." I forgot to mention that she completely dominated my smart ass, didn't I? She's sweet as sugar, oh yes, but when it came down to what happened last night, she took complete control. I wasn't used to it and at first fought her for dominance, but I have the scratches on my back to prove that was a no-go. Make no mistake: once I got used to it I had the time of my fucking life, but next time I was going to push a little harder to get my way. I was brought back out of my flashback as Bomba slid slowly off of me, being careful to drag her leg slowly across my crotch. I tensed up, waiting for the claws to come next. They didn't, but I didn't dare to even breathe. "I don't know Munkustrap. Might have to try him out yourself" she suggested with a smirk. Munkustrap raised an eyebrow. "I'll see you toms later. Tugger…" she started to say something, but stopped. "See you." She finally settled on. And she bounded away towards the meeting center of the junkyard.
"So…how'd THAT go?" Munkus asked. I nodded, still in complete sexual shock.
"It welt…and we…and I…so she…"
"She completely dominated you, didn't she?"
"Yeah." I was too hormoned-up to even deny it.
"That's got to be a first."
"Yeah…it was actually pretty hot." I finally stood up and we both leapt out of the car onto the ground.
"Mmm Tugger being submissive. I gotta tell you little brother, that kind of turns me on." he joked, trying to grab me from behind.
"Ugh, shut up faggot." I shoved him away.
"Faggot? Not I. The only thing I'll say is Mistoffelees." I shoved him again, and pointed a threatening finger at him.
"Stop it. Not funny."
"Alright alright chill out."
"Tell you what. You think it's so hot then fine. We can all have a wild-foursome tonight: you, me, Bomba, and your baby momma. I stopped in my tracks. "And…how did THAT go, now that we're on the subject?" A smile that combined mischief and pure joy found my brother's face. He took my arm and pulled.
"Come on, I'll show you." I let hi drag me to the center of the junkyard where the tribe was gathered. There were a bunch of queens and kittens sitting around Demeter as she sat on the tire. They all asked her questions, and each time she pantomimed zipping her lips. Munkustrap motioned for me to stay put, so I leaned against the tire and watched Bombalurina arrive and run straight for Demeter. They whispered conversation for a few minutes until Munkustrap stood on the tire, arms slightly raised. It took maybe three seconds for everyone to be quiet. Our protector so well respected. He cleared his throat and began to speak.
"Good morning everyone." He said. There was a small chorus of "good morning"s in return. "I've got an important and…exciting announcement to make." Not-so-interested heads plucked up to hear the excitement. "Last night…I went to Demeter and Bombalurina's den…" he extended a paw towards Demeter, which she took, and he helped her to his feet. He placed an arm around her waist and she looked at his shoulder. Demeter is a shy queen, I'm sure she wasn't exactly excited about having everyone staring at her. "And I asked Demeter to be my mate." There were many gasps and "aww"s from mostly queens. "And she's accepted my request. I'm pleased to present you with your Protector's queen Demeter." There were cheers and applause, and Munkustrap nuzzled Demeter's head gently before releasing her. Bomba grabbed her immediately and hugged her tight. Both Munkustrap and Demeter were being congratulated like crazy, but Munkustrap signaled for silence again. "Wait, wait, there's one more thing." It took slightly longer for everyone to quiet down, because everyone wanted to get in their congratulations, but silence fell eventually. "Demeter has also informed me…that she is pregnant." This time there were actual screams. I had to duck down and cover my ears it was so loud. The tribe divided, queens surrounded Demeter, and toms surrounded Munkustrap. I watched Bomba out of the corner of my eye, from my new position next to my brother. She had a sudden sick look on her face. She kept looking over her shoulder. There was a spot on her neck that she seemed to keep needing to scratch…a lot of the queens had begin to disperse, so Bomba pulled Demeter aside. I'm really not one for lip reading, so I couldn't tell what was being said, but Bomba wasn't looking at Demeter, and she was blinking excessively. Demeter wasn't yelling, but the look on her face told me that she wanted to. Demeter pointed at me for a hair of a second, and Bomba looked completely defeated, but she said nothing. Demeter threw her hands up in frustration and walked back into the group of queens. Bomba took a few deep breaths and then began to walk away. Demeter watched her go out of the corner of her eye, but no one else seemed to notice her go. Pollicles dream of days like these: when even the protectors are at the meeting grounds. It wasn't safe for Bombalurina to go off alone. I followed her from a distance. It was hard though, because she just could not stop looking over her shoulder, even though I wasn't making any noise. Her movement was twitchy and spastic, like she was scared. We walked for a while and I finally started to get worried when she walked right out the junkyard gate. She hung a left towards the house of the Junkyard Manager. I would not follow her any further. You'd have to be stupid to go into that backyard. She skirted around the shack towards the dog house in the backyard. But no dog lived there. That dog had been slaughtered years ago. Left on the doorstep of the manager. The killer was the new inhabitant of the doghouse, and only I, him, his friends, and apparently Bomba knew who lived there now.

Macavity.

I wandered back to the junkyard, almost more hurt than confused. Was she with Macavity? Was that where she always disappeared to? It made sense. She was always so intrigued by the Hidden Paw. Liked his mystery. Has I really been stupid enough to move too fast and be completely used…again? I walked around the edges of the junkyard for the rest of the day, half waiting for Bomba's return. As it got dark, the air became thick with humidity, and I could sense rain coming. I should've just gone home.
"Hi Tugger." A voice laced with sugar came from behind me. It was older, more mature than the last time I'd spoken to it.
"Hi Etcetera." She took my response as an excuse to walk next to me. I smiled at her, but tried not to be too sweet.
"What are you doing out here by yourself?" she asked. Her arm kept brushing mine, too often for it to be an accident.
"I should ask you the same question. It's not safe for a kitten to be this far…I'm sorry." She'd stopped walking when I called her a kitten. "Etci, I slipped. I'm sorry." She shook her head.
"It's okay. It's fine…it happens."
"Etci, you're not a kitten, I know you're not a kitten."
"I know you do. I would hope that if anyone would know, it would be you." She took a few steps closer to me and placed her paws on my chest. I froze. "If I was a kitten, then you wouldn't want me."
"Etci…" I groaned. I didn't want her starting with this. Not now.
"And you do, don't you? I can feel it…" I had a lot of Etci pressed against me all of a sudden.
"Etci, now really isn't the…" But I was silenced by her mouth on mine. Not. Fucking. Fair. For a moment I let her, but this could not go on. I cared about her, please don't question that, but with Bomba in my head this was like kissing my sister. I pushed her lightly off. "Etci no." I kept my eyes shut, not wanting to see the look I knew was on her face.
"Is it another queen?" she asked. I shook my head.
"That's honestly not the point. I just...it's not you Etci, I promise, it's me. I...you don't love me, do you?" I waited while she got up the guts to look at me. "Yeah, I thought not."
"But I could, Tugger! I just know I could..."
"You don't have to. Etci, go find a tom who makes you happy. You'll know him when you find him, trust me. You're beautiful, you're sweet, you'll have no problem finding someone to love you, once you're ready to love them."
"If I'm so wonderful...why can't my tom be you?" I took her paws in mine and held them to my chest.
"There's someone else, if that simplifies things at all." She nodded.
"Should've guessed." she said with a smile.
"But Etci, I care about you, and I hope you'll take my friendship. I love you, but in the way I'd love a sister. Is that enough?" she smiled.
"It's enough." she wasn't lying, but she wasn't happy. She'd get over it soon enough, I knew that.
"Come here you." I ruffled the fur on the top of her hair, and gave her a light kiss on her forehead. Suddenly I heard a gasp, and for a second I thought it was Etcetera, but when I looked to my left, I realized we were standing right next to the front junkyard gate...through which Bombalurina had just entered. I saw a scarlet blur dart away, back towards the safe center of the junkyard, in the direction of her and Demeter's den. "Shit." I muttered. I looked back at Etcetera, and realized that it didn't matter how much Bomba had seen; she'd still think it was something it wasn't.
"What is it?" asked Etci, on her toes now.
"Ohhh shit." was all I replied. I tapped her shoulder in goodbye before taking off as fast as I could, trying to follow Bomba. Of course as soon as I did so the skies opened up and water and lightning filled the air. "Fucking PERFECT." I yelled over the roar of thunder. I could've gone left back to mine and Munkustrap's den, but instead I turned right, towards Bomba and Demeter. I banged on the makeshift front door. I wasn't unfamiliar with the den. I'd been in it...twice, maybe three times with Munkustrap for gatherings with Demeter and others. The den was often used as a private meeting house, when we needed to house more than could fit comfortably in the car. Bombalurina and Demeter lived in a cave of sorts, created by accident when a dumped pile of junk landed just the right way to leave a surprisingly large circular room. It stayed very warm in the winter, and in the summer, pieces could be moved to keep it quite comfortably cool. I had to bang on the door for quite a few minutes before I got any type of response. Demeter came to the door and poked her head outside, glaring at me like death.
"Dem, hi. Is Bombalurina home?" I asked, out of breath and shivering from the rain.
"Yes."
"...can I talk to her?"
"No." and she shut the door in my face. I knocked again.
"Dem? Come on! Come on Demeter, open the door." Nothing. "Bomba? Demeter? Hello? Open up, come on!" Still nothing. "I'll STAND HERE ALL NIGHT IF I HAVE TO!" Oh throw me a fucking bone here! "I'll curl up right outside this door and go to sleep." I called with my head against the door. And when again no response came, I did just that. I fluffed up my fur and curled up on the ground, getting wetter and colder by the second, and closed my eyes.

long author's note

yayyy for me finally updating!
cheers? anyone? no? no applause? fine.
sorry this one took me a little longer. i swear to god, this story has gotten the better of me. the plot of the sequel has been 90 planned. not entirely sure of a title, or an ending yet, but it's coming.
this is like..the longest section ever. i write such short chapters and this one came out to about 6 microsoft word pages.
i've been writing the whole thing on paper during school due to lack of free time at home, and an excess of it at school. i'm up to 34 sides of paper (yay for me being a complete and total fag).
i've got the most insane weekend coming up, but the dullest week. so i really don't know when i'll have five up.
but get excited to find out where Bomba's been going!
i tell you, you will not see it coming.
okay...maybe you will. if you're a Bomba hater. i'm not. i happen to be quite fond of her. this just made for one hell of a plot twist.
i've got like fifty planned out.
i love reviews more than oxygen.
so gogogo.

/long author's note