A/N: I OWN NOTHING OF DREAMFALL/DREAMFALL CHAPTERS OR STAR WARS REBELS! ALL RIGHTS GO TO THEIR CREATORS!
Chapter 6: Roper Klacks the Wizard
Ezra found Crow sitting on a couple crates just outside the doorways to Abnaxus' Abode. "Hey, Crow. Didn't you say something about a wizard and a puppet show?" the Padawan asked the bird.
"Nope," Crow answered.
"You did. You said something about a show in the square-" Ezra was cut off.
"I did not," Crow denied.
"Crow…" Ezra muttered.
"Oh! Right, right! Roper Klacks' Fingerlings!" the bird exclaimed. "Man, that show's great. A modern classic."
"Klacks… He's the wizard April Ryan fought?" Ezra asked.
"That's right. He was behaving badly, so she fought him and trapped him in some sort of calculating machine. Pretty clever stuff," Crow replied.
"Where is the puppet show?" Ezra asked.
"I'll show you," Crow answered and flew off with Ezra following.
They soon arrived at the puppet show where Ezra walked behind the board wall separating him from the audience and stepped up to Roper who said, not looking at him, "If you seek an autograph, you must purchase my book first. It's on sale today, only-" Ezra cut him off.
"No, sorry. I need to talk to you," the Padawan stated.
"Talk, hmm?" Roper responded and finally looked at Ezra. "Well, I only have a few minutes before my show begins, but I am sure I can spare a couple of them for a smart, young man like you."
"So, you're show is called 'The Fingerlings'?" Ezra asked.
"Ah, my beloved finger puppets! Beloved by all! Children and critics alike!" Roper replied. "Gilbert Grutton of the Daily Marcurian called my show 'simply astonishing', and wrote that it was 'quite impossible to look away', 'I couldn't believe my eyes', and 'like a slow-motion cart wreck'. You see, the Fingerlings represent a revolution in finger-puppeteering. Or, as I call it, fingering. Trademark and patent pending. The women in particular are quite ecstatic about it. Stay for the show! I guarentee a good time!"
"Do you remember April Ryan?" Ezra asked.
"April Rye- Oh, yes, of course, absolutely, certainly, naturally. That bitch-" he stopped himself before correcting, "The brave young woman who came to my castle and stole-And helped me put my sorcerous past behind me. How could I possibly forget?"
"About April-" Klacks cut the young boy off.
"Why? Why does everyone talk about April Ryan? She was just a weak little human who stumbled into things she didn't-" he stopped himself again and corrected himself, "No, no, no, no, I must apologize. You see, April and I had some disagreements in the past. I'm past that now. I'm a different person. As for April Ryan… I hear she suffered an ignoble death at the hands of our Azadi benefactors. What a shame. What a terrible, terrible shame."
"Okay…" Ezra muttered. "You are Roper Klacks, the wizard, right?"
"Who told you that?" Roper asked.
"Well, that sign for one," Ezra answered.
"No! The… The wizard part! Who told you?" Roper retorted. "I mean, I am merely a humble finger-puppeteer trying to make an honest living in a cold and heartless world."
"But you were a wizard," the Padawan pressed.
"Fully rehabilitated! I don't go anywhere near… sorcery. Not anymore," the wizard retorted. "You should really read my highly acclaimed and bestselling memoir, 'Farewell to my Wizardin' Ways'!It's a thrilling story of redemption and romance, of dashing heroes and wicked villainesses, of flying castles and curious calculating devices! Every word of it is true as the night is dark and the day is bright, of course."
"Do you recall owning a soul-stone?" Ezra asked.
"A… soul-stone? I-I don't know what you're talking about," Roper replied.
"I was just wondering since there are so many impressive tales about your power where I come from," Ezra lied.
"And where would that be?" Roper asked.
"Uh-" Ezra was about to lie again but the wizard cut him off.
"That was a long time ago, in another life. I've moved on. I'm a different person now… in every way," Roper told him.
"I'm just wondering what happened to the stone," Ezra responded.
"She took it, that… bitch," Roper answered. "Balance! Pardon me! I don't know where that came from."
"Who took it?" Ezra pressed.
"The Yaga. 'The Wicked Witch of the North', as the simpletons call Her. As if they have any idea who and what She truly is…" Roper explained. "She lurks in Riverwood, in the dark places. She feeds on that stone like a-" He cleared his throat for a moment. "Like I said, that's in the past and I've left it behind, long ago. Now I make an honest living bringing joy to children through my most excellent and revolutionary finger-puppet-theatre. And on that note, I must beg your pardon, young man. The show is about to begin!"
"Can we talk again after? I have some more question-" Ezra was cut off.
"Sure, sure, sure. Absolutely. After the show. After the show. Yes, yes, yes," Roper agreed. "Toodeloo!" Ezra smirked as Roper went to begin his show. He walked to the audience rows in front of the "stage" and watched as the rehabilitated wizard began the show, "Ladies and gentlemen! Boys and girls! Humans and- well, humans! And you Azadi soldiers standing over there. You're welcome to watch. Just don't rattle your sabers or rustle your suits. Welcome to this morning's performance of… The Fingerlings!" The curtain opened to show hands with small people puppets on his fingers making Ezra hold down a laugh. "I am your host and puppeteer, Roper Klacks, esteemed thespian and raconteur, author and entrepreneur, my book is available to purchase with free, personalized dedication, speak to me after the show. A donation is both appreciated and expected, drop your coins into the box after the show, remember that every iron piece goes to a good purpose."
'I wonder to what "good purpose",' Ezra thought.
"My beloved Fingerlings! Handcrafted reproductions of renowned actors from across Arcadia, immortalized in finger-puppet-form by skilled artisans," Roper continued, "using only the finest fabrics and natural materials, these lovely creatures are as dear to me as children, and as talented and protean as the finest human players! You're all welcome to approach the stage after the show, of course, to admire my finely crafted miniatures up close and intimately, no food, no touching, no children." The curtain closed again. "And now, beloved audience, prepare yourselves for a journey into mystery! For a true story of wizardry and magic! I present to you… the Tale of the Good-Hearted Wizard and the Villainous Wench!" The curtains opened again to show a different scenery. "Once upon a time, in the distant north, there lived a kindly old wizard in a wonderful flying castle." He brought up a finger puppet of himself. "This very friendly wizard liked to tease and toy with the people of the land, and… sometimes he would do silly things like turn them into stone or furry animals, or bottle up the wind. Naturally, he meant no harm and the people of the land loved the wizard like they would a grandfather. A very young and very, very handsome grandfather. But one day, an evil sorceress from a distant land came to visit the kindly wizard. This ugly, selfish witch didn't understand that the wizard was only trying to make people happy. She used her dark sorcery to steal all of his possessions and trap him inside a tiny little box where the gentle wizard was barely able to breathe. The poor old man was trapped for many moons inside this box, before a benevolent wandering god arrived to free him from his prison. The wizard pledged total allegiance to the wandering god in return for vengeance against the cruel witch who trapped him. Together, they-"
He was cut off by Onor calling with a obviously commanding Azadi, "There he is, commander. The dangerous loon who's corrupting our youth with his occult fingerings!" The soldiers went and grabbed Roper who tried to refuse arrest.
The commander stated, "You're teaching children of magic, old man. You ought to know better." Roper was taken away.
"Wait," Ezra called. "He wasn't teaching kids about magic. He was just telling a tale, a story. Is there really something wrong with telling a story to kids?"
"What would you know, boy? You're just a child," the commander retorted. "You don't know anything about the world, yet."
"Believe me, I know more than you think," Ezra retorted. The commander glared warningly before walking off with Roper being taken away. The group of people that were watching also seemed upset that Roper was arrested.