Hey hey :) I finally got this chapter finished. While writing it, it got longer and longer and longer and ... well, you can imagine and I hope you can forgive me for taking so long. ;3

Anyway, there will be a longer AN at the end of this chapter because there is something very important for me about this chapter, but I don't want to spoil anything. :) so, I'm just saying there are some flashbacks in here. Wrongaboutme: and one with Camille, though she'll probably reappear in later flashbacks.

And of course big THANKS to my amazing beta alexa-hallywell :3 (You're awesome ;) and thank you for your hard work)

Disclaimer: The plot is mine, the characters not. And the lyrics are from the song 'Counting Stars' by OneRepublic. :)

Chapter 5

"Have I ever told you that you tend to get borderline close to becoming a stalker?"

Magnus looked up from the screen of his laptop where several windows were open showing different places all over the campus. Camille had crossed her arms on top of the back of his chair and watched the screen over his shoulder.

"You might have mentioned it once or twice over the past week", Magnus said with a halfhearted shrug of his shoulders and turned back to look at his screen.

"Well, who is your victim this time?", Camille asked with a sigh.

Obviously at the moment she had nothing else to do because it was a rare act that Magnus found her interested in how he spent his free time if it wasn't an activate with her. Her blond locks brushed his shoulder when she leaned closer to the screen trying to figure out who Magnus was looking for or who he had already found.

For a short moment Magnus debated with himself if he should tell her or not, but in the end the habit of not going through the trouble of trying to hide things from her, he clicked on one of the windows to move it to the front and enlarged it.

"Here, this one", he said moving the cursor next to a boy clad in black who was currently sitting at one of the tables at the cafeteria. He sat there alone and ever since Magnus had found him with the cameras he'd hacked he had felt the strange urge to take a seat next to him.

"Oh, interesting", Camille chuckled, her breath tickling Magnus' right ear. It was so very different from the laughter of the boy when they had been thrown out of the cafeteria the other day. "One of the emos. What'd he do?"

Magnus looked up at her green eyes once again, an expectant and curious shimmer meeting him there. "Why would he have to do something for me to ... look for him." He had never been particularly fond of the word 'stalking'.

Camille sent him a lopsided grin.

"Come on", she said, "why else would you go through the trouble of hacking the cameras. You only do that when there's someone you want revenge on for mocking your way of dressing or dumping coffee on a new shirt." At his bewildered expression she slowly raised an eyebrow and turned her face to look at the screen once again. Magnus did the same though with her next words he wasn't quite sure if they both were looking at the same person.

"You can't actually want to screw this guy, he's not even easy on the eyes. I mean look at his clothes, he probably has found them in the dumpster and I'm pretty sure that he used duck tape to keep those shoes from falling off." She continued to rant on, but Magnus zoned out and looked at the boy himself.

Yes, his clothes had definitely passed their prime, but that wasn't everything there was about him to look at, right? The curve of his neck that lay bare as he tilted his head to the right to lean on his right hand. The pale skin that stretched across high cheekbones. The unruly hair, of such an ink-black that it seemed almost unreal and which was practically begging to be ruffled. His eyes that peeked through his bangs following the strings of words on the paper in front of him. The way his lips moved while reading, silently verbalizing whatever was written there. Magnus was sure that he was the kind of person that could get startled by running a single finger down the back of his neck in such a situation. The kind of person that would glare at whoever had done that. The kind of person who could probably be coaxed into smiling an honest smile afterwards with the right words, with the right gesture.

Magnus wanted to be the kind of person who could make this happen and the moment this realization hit him, it scared the hell out of him.

Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep
Dreaming about the things that we could be
But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard
said no more counting dollars

We'll be counting stars

"Is there a specific reason to why you are lying on the floor?"

Alec heard the door close behind Magnus with a soft 'click'. He grinned without tearing his eyes from the ceiling of the living room. "I was thinking about getting 'glow in the dark'-stars."

An amused chuckle escaped Magnus' lips. The sound of his footsteps followed him as he walked across the living room. Alec closed his eyes and listened to the footsteps of his new and sort of old roommate. An honest smile tugged on his lips.

"Stars?" Another chuckle. Judging from the volume Magnus stood by the kitchen counter. Alec could hear the rustling of the paper bag, the dull thud of the milk carton, other softer thuds, apples rolling around. Rolling over the edge? Alec lifted an index finger, expecting the sound of an apple meeting the parquet, maybe two, but it didn't come.

"Nice reflexes", Alec said a grin forming on his lips once again.

Silence. Another chuckle, almost a laughter.

"Did you turn into some kind of mind reader while I was gone?" The playful teasing lacing Magnus' words question made a gentle warmth spread near Alec's heart. His index finger dropped back to the floor, the tip touching cool, but not really cold wood.

"No, don't worry, I just like to simply listen to ... things once in a while - it helps relaxing the brain."

"Oh yeah?" the smirk was clearly audible.

Alec allowed his thoughts to wander once again as he had done before Magnus had returned, before a second voice had scared off the emptiness that invaded the apartment whenever Magnus wasn't around. It felt weird for Alec to have somebody to wait for, to look forward to seeing again. But it was the good kind of weird.

Alec felt a sudden sharp pain in his right ear though it disappeared as fast as it had come. The same happened with the music he had just been listening to. With a mixture of confusion and irritation he blinked at the guy who had ripped out one of his earphones.

"What the-?", Alec started, but he was interrupted by the cheerful voice of another student which seemed absolutely not fitting for the current situation - or so he thought.

"That's why you didn't react, you simply didn't hear me - and I was already anxious you might be ignoring me."

Alec narrowed his eyes at the young man standing in front of him. Sparkling colors greeted his eyes on a closer inspection of the others attire. Artfully smudged eyeliner created wafting shadows around fascinating eyes.

"You're that idiot from the cafeteria", Alec growled, his own eyes flossing with recognition. "What do you want?"

"Magnus." The idiot's smile seemed immovable, though there could be seen a gentle light flickering in those green eyes - if you'd squint hard enough. Alec had never been very fond of squinting, It was way too easy for him to get a headache from doing it for too long.

"What?"

"Magnus, that's my name and to be honest I prefer it over 'idiot'."

Alec raised one eyebrow. "And I should care about that because ...?"

The smile on Magnus' lips slipped a bit, but only to turn into a lopsided one which ended up as a smirk. "Well, I assumed that you wouldn't want me to continue running after you while yelling 'grumpy kid'?"

It felt like the heat of the sudden blush would sear the skin on Alec's face. So that was what he hadn't heard before. "You did not", he hissed, but Magnus only chuckled and with that he crushed every last hope it might have been a joke. Alec groaned and buried his face in both hands. Eventually he sighed and looked back up at Magnus again.

"What do you want from me? Just spit it out!"

But Magnus didn't answer. He only raised one eyebrow. A silent challenge hidden within his unspoken words. Alec knit his eyebrows wondering if he might have gone mute over the past couple seconds. He was about to ask just that when Magnus opened his mouth again. Though this time his voice was considerably louder.

"Oh, if you must know, grumpy kid, there are indeed several things that I-" In an act of sheer panic Alec clapped his hands over Magnus' mouth making him effectively shut up. His blue eyes were wide, his heart was almost ripping through his ribcage. The other student raised his other eyebrow as well, patiently looking down on Alec who was slightly shorter than him. But only by a few inches.

"Okay, okay", he took a deep breath, "what do you want ... Magnus?"

The other's green eyes brightened visibly and Alec would spent the rest of the week trying to forget about the sensation of Magnus' lips brushing against the palms of his hands as they slowly curved into a smile. Alec took his hands away again. Maybe a bit too hastily.

"Your name."

"My name? What? All this because of that?" The words awkwardly stumbled over Alec's lips while his eyes stayed locked with Magnus' green orbs. The other student only nodded. For a short moment Alec closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He took a deep breath. He brushed one hand through his always messy black hair. "And I guess simply asking 'Hey, what's your name again?' has become uncool somewhere between breakfast and lunch?"

Magnus only shrugged. "Maybe. So, do I get an answer or do I have to proof to you that I am a man of my word?" That damn smirk, Alec hissed inwardly. He gritted his teeth and felt his cheeks burning up again. Why did this guy, Magnus, have to make such a big deal out of it? And why did he care anyway? It was just a name, his name, nothing special.

"It's Alec, Alec Lightwood", he muttered and he could see how the expression on Magnus' face softened, that gentle light flickering in his eyes once again. This time he saw it, he really saw it. He didn't have to squint to catch a faint trace of it and it didn't disappear when a new string of words escaped Magnus' lips.

"Nice to meet you, Alec Lightwood, my name is Magnus Bane."

Alec felt a light chuckle bubble up in his throat, despite himself. His lips weren't able to hold it back and so the chuckle rolled over his tongue, fleeing the cage of his usually tightly shut lips and it carried the first thought along with it that jumped into Alec's mind.

"That rhymes", he chuckled feeling how a tiny bit of the usual tension gripping his shoulders faded away. "It's not the best one, but still ..."

At first Magnus tilted his head a bit a puzzled expression resting on his face, but then it slowly dissolved like fog losing its battle against the rays of sunlight. Eventually he grinned at Alec with a fond look in his eyes which the younger one didn't quite get. Though before he could ask Magnus why he was looking at him like that, the young man in question raised one hand and ruffled Alec's hair in a loving gesture. It was the first time ever that Alec didn't mind.

"You're weird", Magnus whispered letting his hand rest on top of Alec's head just a little while longer. "But in a good way."

Magnus felt like he could stay like this forever. His fingers entangled in those soft raven locks, with those curious blue eyes staring up at him.

Alec didn't know that he had spent most of his free time since their fateful encounter at the cafeteria trying to find out as much as possible about this 'weird, but in a good way'-emo kid. The first thing he'd found out had been his name. Alexander Gideon Lightwood.

He knew what classes he had this semester, how old he was, where he was born, which school he'd attended, how often he had to change schools, that he had a few sessions with a therapist because of his bad temper and antisocial behavior. Magnus knew a lot about this guy standing in front of him and he knew that knowledge was power. A power he loved to hold, to wield, to use against the rest of the world. He knew how to slowly invade other people's mind how to make them do what he wanted.

So, why had he spent the whole night trying to think of an excuse to talk to Alec? Why did he even need one? Why didn't he just talk to him, confront him with the things he knew about him? Why didn't he use the power he already had? Why didn't he make him ... well, what? What did he want Alec to do?

Alec eyed him suspiciously and Magnus couldn't blame him, but before he could pull his hand back, disentangling his fingers from these black strands which felt cool and warm at the same time Alec simply shook him off and turned around, walking away. Once again he left Magnus behind without another word and with the prodding thought that maybe this time he was powerless after all.

A soft voice broke through the fog of the blurred memory.

"I feel something so right
Doing the wrong thing
I feel something so wrong
Doing the right thing
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie
Everything that kills me makes me feel alive."

Alec cracked one eye open. The next second both eyes flew open wide with shocked upraise because he found Magnus' face only inches from his own. Magnus cocked one eyebrow, teasingly grinning down at him.

"So much for the hearing, hm?" He chuckled at Alec's following glare. Magnus' face was upside down because he was sitting or kneeling on the floor behind Alec's head leaning on both hands which were placed on the left and right side of the dark halo Alec's hair formed on the living room floor.

"My hearing is still good enough to be able to say that you missed a couple of notes", Alec muttered sullenly. Magnus sent him a dazzling grin and bent down to swiftly press his lips against the writer's forehead.

"Good to know, sweetheart. I was starting to get worried." Magnus was about to get back up again, but Alec held him back grabbing his wrist on a sudden impulse. 'Don't leave', the little voice in his head whispered.

"What do you think about the stars?", he asked, blue eyes averting green ones, pale fingers firmly grasping tan wrists.

"The stars?"

"Yeah, 'glow in the dark'-stars."

Thoughtfully Magnus raised his gaze towards the ceiling. Alec watched him, letting his own gaze trailing over the curve of his neck, the line of his jaw, subconsciously rubbing his thumbs across the skin of Magnus' wrists in small, barely-there circles.

Since he'd been a little child Alec had loved to decorate the walls of his room with those little plastic stars. He had even arranged them in zodiac signs though not the ones everybody knew. He had created his own signs because he hadn't wanted to replicate the night-sky on the ceiling and the walls of his room, he had wanted to create his own, his own sky to look at, to dream beneath. So, every night before going to sleep, before closing his eyes, he would look up at the 'little duckling', the 'seahorse', the 'smileyface' and many others. He kept enlarging his collection and changing their places until the day he moved out of his parent's house.

"Let me do something before I give you an answer to that question." Magnus gently pried his wrists from Alec's surprisingly firm grip. Eventually Alec let him go. He turned his head to watch Magnus get up and walk over to the wall next to the doorway that led to Alec's bedroom. A soft 'click' sounded and the light of the lamp on the ceiling died. It took Alec a few seconds to adjust to the missing light and by the time he had managed to Magnus had already sat down next to him.

"What are you planning?", Alec asked with only a little bit of wavering in his voice. Magnus grinned at him, white teeth almost shining in the dim light which got slowly broken by the sunlight sneaking in from outside.

"Don't worry, sweetheart, I won't do anything" He looked down at Alec for a while and then lowered his head a bit more, bringing their faces closer to each other. "Not unless you want me to."

Alec turned his face away, but the fading darkness of the room was hardly enough to hide the blush creeping on his face. "So, what was your plan then?", he muttered still focusing on a spot on the wall next to the couch. He heard Magnus' low laughter behind him, then the rustling of clothes.

"I just wanted to get another angle of view."

Magnus lay down next to Alec, their arms slightly touching as he positioned himself to look up at the darkened ceiling as well.

"Hmmmm ...", Magnus tilted his head first to the right then to the left. "Yeah, I think some 'glow in the dark'-stars would be nice." Satisfied with his decision and final answer he nodded to himself. A snorted laughter sounded next to him and when he turned his head to look at the writer he was met with a disbelieving but gentle smile.

"What?", Magnus asked.

"You had to turn off the light for that?"

"Well, not everybody can have your magnificent imagination."

Alec went quiet for a few heartbeats and Magnus was afraid he'd taken it too far with the teasing, with the sarcasm lacing his words. Maybe it had been too strong? But instead of being offended, Alec rolled on his stomach, edging closer to his roommate like this and propping himself up on his elbows his face was hovering over Magnus' this time. A lazy smile danced on his lips.

"Why do people keep saying that?"

Magnus' eyebrows shot up, closing the distance to his hairline. "You're kidding, right? I've told you, I've read every one of your books and let me tell you that you have a way to describe things alarmingly vivid. I mean that cellar-scene from the first book ... I still get goose bumps only thinking of the word 'screwdriver'. Look." He raised his left arm as a proof to his words. Alec raised one eyebrow looking at the arm, back at Magnus and then at the arm again. With a disbelieving snort he raised one of his own hands tracing the other's arm with his fingertips.

"Oh, you'e right", he whispered, but the look of surprise got quickly replaced by one of lazy amusement. "But it still stands, my vivid imagination only works when it's about killing and torturing other people. The way blood drips to the floor, how a saw cuts off-"

"Aaaaaand stop right there", Magnus interrupted him taking back his arm and crossed his arms in front of his chest, then started rubbing his upper arms. "I get it without you going into the creepy details."

Now it was Alec's turn to teasingly grin down at him. "It's one of the reasons I decided to write Thriller and not Romance", he said and Magnus had to fight down the urge to pinch his cheek again. But then a sudden idea popped up in his head. He pursed his lips thoughtfully.

"So, does this mean that I could out you as a kind of psychopath if I wanted to?", he teased though he'd never even dream of doing that. Magnus wasn't a writer himself, but if he had learned something from reading several thrillers it was that you had to have sort of a dark side if you wanted to be successful. It was one thing to get the right ideas and a completely different challenge to write it down.

"Yeah, you could do that." The smirk vanished from Alec's lips and something in the mood between them shifted though Magnus couldn't quite put his finger on it. Alec tilted his head to the right and his lips were set in a calm, but strict line. "You know a lot about me", he whispered.

Magnus felt a lump grow in his throat. He had always paid attention to what he said to Alec, so that he wouldn't give away how much he actually knew and after a bit of a rocky start in college he had actually become quite good at it- or so he thought. On the morning after their 'reunion' he had had the plan of telling Alec about the hacking some day, but as the days passed he wasn't sure about that anymore. Alec knew he was good with computers, but that was as far as it went. Had he possibly slipped too often? Had he been found out? Oh, God ... would Alec actually kick him out? A tiny panic rose inside of Magnus and he was sure it was visible on his face, clearly visible.

Alec narrowed his eyes and brought his face even closer to the one of his roommate.

"Why is it so easy for me to talk to you about these things?" He bit his bottom lip and frowned at Magnus. "I'm not someone who easily talks to other people about private things."

He was still looking at his roommate, but said roommate had the strong feeling that he was actually kind of talking to himself, muttering under his breath. Magnus felt the lump in his throat and the freezing cold in his guts disappear. The tension left his shoulders and he had to bite the inside of his cheek to prevent himself from laughing out loud in relief.

Alec was awesome at creating criminal master plans for the killers in his book, dropping little hints between the lines and writing dialogues with double meanings which created a tension between characters like only a few others could. In real life though was this writer not really one for figuring out subtle things. It had been one hell of a Mission Impossible to get him to understand that Magnus was 'interested' in him during college. It worked just fine after he had finally gotten the message, but to get there Magnus head had collided with solid walls on more than one occasion. But he had learned to deal with that and had even learned to like this about Alec.

This time was different. Back in college they had mostly interacted on a physical level, now it was an emotional level. He could deal with low self-esteem, suicidal thoughts or identity crisis, hell, he had even had a course on how to help people figuring out their sexuality - which was far from necessary in this case - but this ... what was he supposed to say? Interacting with other people was easy for Magnus and he also had a few tricks up his sleeve to make others feel more comfortable in his company. He had never used any of them with Alec ... okay, he had tried, but there simply were things that the writer seemed to be immune against, the same went for flirting.

"Because you like me?"

There was no way to answer that question without sounding like an arrogant ass or a creep. Magnus tried the arrogance. That had always worked better for him then the creep. He sucked at being creepy. Also, outing himself as a possible creep could be leading to himself sleeping not only on the couch, but on the floor of the staircase.

Alec didn't look very convinced. "You think I like you?"

"If not, I'd like you to leave me my illusions." That made Alec smile and Magnus wanted to hug him.

"I think I do."

His eyes darted to the side and with a blush stating to heat up his cheeks he scrambled to his feet, stepping over Magnus and practically running over to the light switch. The ceiling lamp came back to life and Magnus squeezed his eyes shut at the sudden light. Though in his head he kept repeating Alec's last words. He liked him? Well, he had always hoped that one day - He fucking liked him! Magnus' eyes shot open and he sat up, but still remaining on the parquet of the living room. He watched Alec as the writer sat down at the kitchen table staring at the screen of his laptop, his cheeks flaring red.

"Wait, does that mean-"

"The 'no sex'-rule still stands."

Damn it!

With a heavy sigh Magnus let his head fall back. I think I do. He felt a stupid giddy grin forming on his lips. Granted, it was still a long way from like to love and from thinking to knowing, but it was a step into the right direction, it was a little evidence that leaving France like that had been a good decision, the right decision. He let his gaze wander across the empty ceiling. When he was out shopping the next time, he'd look for some 'glow in the dark'-stars. On a second thought, he should probably rather be looking for a job for being able to pay for those stars himself. At the moment Alec was paying for both of them. Another, more frustrated sigh left Magnus' lips. But then he suddenly remembered something he was meaning to ask Alec for a few days now. He snapped his gaze back at the writer who was still sitting in the exact same position in front of his laptop.

"Hey, Alec, I've been meaning to ask you something", he said and his eyebrows rose with surprise as he saw the others shoulders tense up. What did he expect him to ask that made him so uneasy? "Do you know who is living at the ... wait, one, two - third floor?"

The tension left Alec's shoulders as soon as it had come. He turned his head and looked at Magnus with confusion written over his face. "Third floor?" Magnus nodded. "Uh, a married couple if I recall correctly, but they had a kind of on-off-relationship if the arguments you could listen to when passing their door stated anything. They moved out about two weeks ago, I think. Why?"

Magnus' eyes went wide with pure shock. "TWO WEEKS?! WHAT THE HELL?", he yelled and jumped to his feet and was halfway out of the apartment when Alec caught him by his wrist.

"What's wrong, Magnus?", he asked and the other man whirled around, meeting the writer's questioning gaze with one of pure fury. Magnus took a deep, shuddering breath while he tried not to scream at the person who didn't deserve it.

"Did you ever hear anything when you went past that door on the third floor?"

"No, not that I can remember, the staircase has been surprisingly quiet since they have left."

Another deep breath. Magnus clenched his fists on his sides and was ready to punch something.

"Did you ever notice something on the wall outside of this building?" Alec looked at him like he had lost his mind. Maybe he was better at the creep-thing than he'd thought, but that was the least important thing at the moment. "On the right side, where that narrow alleyway passes by."

For a few seconds Alec thought about it till his eyes suddenly lit up remembrance. "You mean the stairs?", he asked. "They are for a cat in one of the apartments - there had been an ugly fight with the landlord about it, they lead to the apartment at the-" He became quiet and pressed his lips into a thin line. Magnus nodded.

"Exactly, they lead to the third floor."

Together they pretty much sprinted down the stairs to the third floor. Well, it was more like Magnus was sprinting and Alec trying not to lose him while he also tried not to kiss the stairs because of course he hadn't taken any shoes with him. Now he was running down the staircase of the building with nothing but socks; socks that probably were two sizes too big. When Magnus stopped in front of the questioned door Alec would have almost run into him, but managed to stop shortly before that could happen.

"Listen", Magnus hissed and motioned Alec to put his ear against the door which he did after glancing up and down the staircase. He didn't really have the desire to be seen as some kind of stalking creep by his neighbors, it was bad enough that the old lady one floor above his apartment had found out that he had written the books that had given her niece nightmares. And there was only so much of frantic knocking and 'I know you're there and I want you to apologize'-calls one could take at a time. After a few moments Alec could make out a soft meowing from inside. He looked at Magnus to confirm if he had heard it too or if Alec himself started to imagine things.

"Did you hear?"

Alec nodded and stepped away from the door. Magnus did the same. Then he knocked on the door. "Anybody home?" No answer, just a louder wailing of a cat. Alec flinched at the sound, while Magnus crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"So, you think they left their cat when they moved?"

"It has happened before", Magnus growled and stared at the door with narrowed eyes. "And I highly doubt it's forgotten recording that just keeps playing."

It became very clear that this was something very personal to Magnus. Leaving a pet behind like this was nothing any owner should ever even think about, but the way Magnus reacted - that was different level of anger.

"We should get the landlord and the keys to the apartment-" The words died on Alec's tongue when Magnus sent him a glare that he wasn't used to. Well, he had seen it before, but never directed at himself. It scared him. Alec had always known Magnus had a strength to him that was fascinating, but that also meant that when he took something personal he didn't care about his behavior towards others - like a ticking bomb, only waiting to blow up. Alec swallowed. "-or we could just pick the lock and break in."

Magnus didn't smile and at this moment Alec realized something. As intrusive as the taller man could seem sometimes, his sympathy was still something that had to be earned and that could be lost anytime. Suddenly Alec felt bad for trying to kick Magnus out in the beginning. In a way he had always taken his attention for granted. He had always been there, intruding his world with winks, kisses and stolen touches. Before Alec could think about making a move towards him, Magnus had always been already there. There had never been the need to ... to work for his attention. And even when he had stood in front of Alec's door that first night. He had been there before Alec could have decided to look after him, find out where he lived now and - a bitter taste lay on his tongue - he had been the one to let Magnus go when he had left for France. He had always seen it as a decision Magnus had made, something he couldn't change and they hadn't been officially dating anyway. But that didn't mean anything. He still could have fought for him, asked him to stay, to break up with Camille. He hadn't done it. He had been sure that only Magnus needed him as a distraction. Never had he thought of himself needing Magnus.

"I'll be right back", Magnus muttered and ran the stairs back up and Alec looked after him, whispering a silent 'I need you'.

His roommate returned about three minutes later again with a little leather bag which contained lock picks in different sizes. Magnus kneeled down in front of the door knob, going to work. In the meantime Alec glanced up and down the stairs, but luck seemed to be on their side, nobody decided to take a walk or get home. The third 'click' of the day sounded through the empty staircase when the lock gave in and the door swung ajar. Now the meow was louder and it got closer to the door as Magnus tentatively nudged the door to open wider. A pitiable wailing followed the meow and both men looked down to the floor where a little ball of fur stood in the doorway looking up at them with big blue-green eyes.

The cat looked miserable. The grey-striped fur was tangled in knots and the rips could be seen due to the thinness of its body. The wailing continued and it broke Alec's heart because unspoken words were carried with the sound. 'I'm hungry.' 'I'm lonely.' 'When will the people that looked after me come back?'

"We could be thieves", Magnus whispered next to Alec and when he looked up at the other man, his gaze was fixed on the little pet, his face a grimace of pain. Alec wasn't even sure if he was aware of the words he uttered. "We could kill him and till the last minute he would think that maybe someone finally came back to feed him, to care for him."

There were tears that had never been cried, almost drowning the whispered words.

"You're right", Alec heard himself say and Magnus looked up at him as if he'd forgotten that the writer was there. "But we're not." This seemed to snap Magnus out of his trance and the determined look showed on his face which Alec had been met with on the morning after their 'reunion'.

"Exactly, and we will take care of him." There was a hint of the usual stubbornness that Alec had already grown attached to during college. He lightly shook his head with the faint trace of a smile on his lips. Magnus bent down to the cat, slowly stretching out his hand and the cat rose its head, bumping the nose against his fingertips. Another heart-wrenching wail was carried through the staircase. "It's okay", Magnus whispered. "We're here, we'll take care of you."

Alec who could hear hesitant footsteps from one of the other floors kneeled down next to Magnus. "Maybe we should get inside before somebody accuses us of stealing the cat." At that Magnus sent him a hard glare, but he didn't back down. Caring for an abandoned cat was great and honorable, but that didn't mean they had to risk any possible complication. "You know what I mean", Alec hissed and motioned Magnus to get inside the empty apartment. The taller man nodded and gently nudged the cat back to get inside.

When the door swung close behind them they were greeted with an apartment that didn't carry any trace of somebody living there and surprisingly there also was no trace of a cat apart from the actual cat which started rubbing his head against Magnus' ankles. Without much thinking he picked it up and after some struggling he managed to position it in a somehow sitting posture, so it could overlook the empty rooms. Magnus sighed as he looked down at the cat and gently brushed his fingertips over its head and the knotted fur. "They just left you, little one. How could somebody just leave you behind?"

Alec looked at him from the doorway of the room that could have been the living room once. In one of the two windows there was a hole through which the cat could reach the little staircase outside. But seeing the hole another question came to mind.

"Why didn't he just leave?" He heard footsteps and when he turned his head, he noticed that Magnus had stepped next to him, looking at the window with the hole too.

"Cats are more attached to the places where they live in, more than to the people they live with", he said his voice low and gentle as if not to startle the little cat nestled in his arms. "That's why you have to keep a cat inside for about one or two weeks before letting it out because otherwise it might not come back due to the simple fact that the new place isn't yet 'home'. Huh?" Magnus' fingers that had been scratching the cat's neck suddenly stopped and his eyes fixed on something black appearing among the knots and grey stripes. "A collar." He let his fingers follow the black strap of leather till he found little plastic sign. Something was written on it, but for Magnus it was upside down.

"Uh, can you read that?", he asked turning to face Alec who stepped closer and squinted at the sign.

"Hmmm, I think it's a name ... Cas-no-Chantair ... Chahair ... Chairman? And the second word is Miefo...no-Meooo? Ah, Meow."

"Chairman Meow? That's a weird name for a cat." Magnus raised an eyebrow. Alec just shrugged and looked back up at him again.

"That's what is written there." He took a second look at the sign. "And there is something written on the back - oh, it's a phone number."

Magnus only snorted in disbelief. "As if I'm going to call those assholes."

Alec sighed and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "You know that we have to. To tell them that we found their cat and-"

"They left him!", Magnus exclaimed and didn't only startle Alec, but the cat to who tried to get out of the embrace of his arms. Regret flashed across his face the next instant and he carefuly scratched the little head of the frightened pet, whispering encouraging words. Alec remembered the gesture and he bit his bottom lip at the memory and the sudden rush of emotion that always came with it.

"You can call them and then maybe they will just say that they don't have room for him anymore or something like that - then you can keep him ... we can keep him."

"So? What if they want him back?"

Magnus turned on his heels and left the apartment leaving Alec behind like he himself had done it so many times with the other one. He sighed heavily. "Then you can yell at them and tell them to go to hell ... like you always do, when you've made up your mind about something", he whispered and followed Magnus back upstairs.

They decided that first of all they had to get something to eat for the cat and clean his fur. Getting the first thing done wasn't that difficult because Magnus proofed that he could reach the next supermarket and be back within seconds though Alec didn't really want to know how many angry customers he had left behind. They had also gotten some water in a little bowl and Alec had opted to pay attention that the cat wouldn't eat too much at once. In the meantime he had practically pushed the phone into Magnus' face along with a note with the number from the sign on the collar written on it. Magnus had glared at him and angrily grabbed the phone muttering words under his breath which Alec simply ignored. Now he was in Alec's bedroom yelling and cussing and ranting. From time to time the cat would look up towards the doorway of the bedroom.

"Don't worry", Alec said and reached out to scratch the little pet behind the ears. "Your new guardian would never yell at you like this." The cat blinked a few times and then lowered its head above the bowl with the water.

A few moments later the apartment turned quiet again and Magnus out of the bedroom. He walked over to where Alec was sitting next to the cat and sat down next to him on the floor. Then he took a deep breath and placed the phone on the parquet. Alec looked at him expectantly.

"So? How did it go?"

"They don't remember a cat", Magnus simply stated, Alec raised an eyebrow at that.

"Oh, really?"

Magnus nodded while inspecting his nails that were missing the usual colorful polish since he'd been forbidden any kind of makeup. "Friendly people."

Alec's lips broke into a grin accompanied by a snorted laughter. He reached up and ruffled Magnus hair that was just as black as his own, but when he wanted to pull his hand away again, Magnus slapped his own hand on top of Alec's securing it in place. He didn't look up at the writer. He moved his thumb in slow, little circles across the back of Alec's hand like the other one had done it earlier this day on the skin of Magnus' wrists. Silence grew between them and a shiver run up Alec's arm caused by the sudden gentle gesture.

"My mother was a maid at some influential politician's house", he whispered his eyes focused on the cat in front of them. "They had an affair or maybe he raped her or forced her to have sex with him, I don't know - but she got pregnant." He bit his bottom lip harsh and Alec was scared the skin could break beneath his teeth. "Her religion forbid abortion, so she carried me out in secret, maybe she had hopes to blackmail the politician or that he would leave his wife for her or whatever else you could use a child for." A cold shiver ran down Alec's spine. He noticed that Magnus' grip on his own hand tightened slightly as if he was scared that Alec would pull away any second. "Well, whatever she wanted to do, it didn't work - obviously - because she gave me up for adoption. But you can't do that, right?" And now he looked up at Alec, his eyes almost pleading. "If you decide to have a child or get a pet, you can't just leave it, right? You have a responsibility, right?"

Alec looked at him, drowned in those sad green eyes and things started to make sense.

"Yeah, you're right."

He didn't ask how old Magnus had been when he'd been given up for adoption, who had adopted him or how he'd found out about his parents. He just sat there moving his thumb in slow little circles across the others scalp. Eventually Magnus took his hand away again and Alec ruffled his hair playfully trying to break through the fog of dark memories that seemed to thicken around him.

"It's not okay." Magnus crossed his arms in front of his chest again and squared his shoulders. "And we will take the Chairman to the vet tomorrow ... if he's still talking to us after the bath."

Alec threw his head back and laughed. It felt good and it earned him a smile from his new and kind of old roommate.

"How about we get those 'glow in the dark'-stars tomorrow? Together."

"Sounds great."

This time, Alec decided, he would fight.

I feel something so right
Doing the wrong thing
I feel something so wrong
Doing the right thing
I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie

Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.

Okay, before you hopefully click the button to leave a review (no pressure though) I would like to share something personal with you that has inspired the story about the Chairman here.

First of all, I've never taken care of a homeless cat (I own three and I love them to pieces), so please don't take the way Magnus and Alec act in this chapter as the one and only way to do. Do some research on the internet or ask a vet or ask friends who have experience with treating neglected cats. :) And if you find a cat that seems to be homeless check the ears for a number or go to a vet to let the cat get checked for a chip.

This chapter is very important to me because a friend of mine found a cat (about four years old) in her neighborhood which had been left behind by her former owners who have moved to wherever you can't take a cat. (insert sarcasm here) She was pregnant at the time and my friend took her in, looked after the babies and took her to a vet for sterilization. But due to her job my friend had to travel a lot around the world and in the end my parents I took the cat in. She got along with our other two, her name's Iffi, she is the cutest little thing ever, sleeps every night on a little pillow next to mine in my bed and I promised to never ever leave her alone again.
she still gets anxious whenever we pack our bags for vacation because she is sacred we won't return and leaver her.

And yeah, I just wanted to say that I think that in a world like ours pets (not only cats) deserve to be loved. Of course I knew that before and I love my other two cats with all my heart, it's just that Iffi's story made me realize that there are people who don't think like that. Maybe writing this not going to change something, but I wanted to let you in on this little story that inspired the one of the Chairman. :)

If you reached this point, thank you very very very much :) Please leave a review and let me know what you think, what you liked and what not. As for the flashbacks, I'm trying to get every of your suggestions integrated in the story and if you have other ideas or wishes for possible flashbacks, please let me know. :D

Bye Pumpkin