The Morning After
It was early in the morning, and the male members of team BRNZ were already in the dining hall enjoying the fresh breakfast provided by the school they were visiting. The hall buzzed with energy, of teams ready to fight and students ready to watch them. Of course, they had been eliminated, but they still planned on watching the rest of the tournament.
The only one who took their loss very hard was May, who had vanished the night before. None of them worried about her. May vanished most nights, tournament or no, good mood or bad, and usually came back with an embarrassed blush and stories that promised to astonish, when they could manage to drag them out of her. They agreed that they needed to something to lighten their spirits, and spent their meal trying to make guesses at what hijinks May may have gotten herself into.
They smiled and bristled with excitement when May finally arrived, still dressed in the clothes she was wearing the day before.
"So, what sort of trouble did you make for yourself?" Brawnz asked as she sat beside them.
May cheeks turned a whole new color of red, and the shade of her blush was usually a good indicator of how wild her night was. She didn't seem to have an appetite. The buffet style eggs, already an unappetizing yellow chunky substance, looked far less appetizing when they were pushed around absentmindedly into the shape of a frowning face. "I don't want to talk about it."
The boys knew the story must be fantastic. They weren't a rowdy bunch– if they were, it would have been a nightmare for the lone, innocent (so she claimed, but they knew better), girl to live with them. Two had committed girlfriends back in their hometowns, and the last was sweet on a girl who went to school with them back in Vacuo. They were polite gentlemen who wouldn't step an inch out of line on their own, which made them all the more eager to live vicariously through the wild stories of their single friend, who had better luck and talent with ladies then any of them.
"Okay, first of all, I am totally, one hundred percent straight," she said.
They all leaned forward, because that was the signal she was about to start. All her stories started with 'I am totally, one hundred percent straight,' without fail. The boys were certain that if a child asked her to tell them a story, she'd mix up 'once upon a time,' with 'I am totally, one hundred percent straight,' which even the kids wouldn't believe. Her stories were, without fail, zero percent straight.
There were two reasonable explanations they came up with. Either May was a lesbian and awful at staying in the closet, or she was straight and hilariously terrible at actually being straight. They couldn't decide which would be funnier.
May clamped her mouth shut and froze, which only told them it was more epic than any of the stories they had heard before, which were already very epic. The only predictable pattern in her stories was she somehow ended up drunk, despite very, very rarely making the conscious decision to drink. Though in truth, their two favorite stories didn't involve alcohol.
In one, May had gone to use the lavatory on an airplane. When the woman before her was stepping out and she was about to step in, the plane hit turbulence. They both tumbled in, and after a few minutes of the plane bobbing wildly in the air, May returned to her seat beside Roy, out of breath and red faced, gripping a slip of paper on which the woman had scribbled her phone number and the name of the hotel where she was staying.
The other involved helping one their professors, known by her nickname 'Professor Short Skirt,' carry a stack of graded tests. They got tangled and tripped down a long, winding set of stairs, and by the time May landed flat on her back on the ground, and the professor on top of her, she had earned an A in a course she wasn't signed up for.
Though they hoped the current tale didn't start with May getting drunk on accident, they knew that they had to ease her into telling what happened. So, Roy asked, "at the least, tell us how you ended up doing whatever it is you did."
May finally nodded. "Okay, and again, I'm straight, but I was in this bar called Jane's Clam Shack–,"
"Going to venture a guess that there weren't a lot of straight girls, or guys, at a bar called Jane's Clam shack," Nolan said, "so why the hell would you go in there?"
"Yeah. The big ol' neon clam on the roof was kind of a dead giveaway. But I thought I saw one of the girls we fought heading in. Turned out it wasn't her. You see, the girl I thought was one of those girls was like– thirty– and taller– and blonder. But, I had only caught a glimpse, and thought it would be nice to have a chance talk to them. You know, just about the fight and stuff. I just had to follow her.
"Anyways, so I followed her into Jane's Clam Shack, and figured out that it wasn't her. It was when I was looking around that bar, that I realized I had this scratchy feeling in my throat, because I had walked pretty far trying to catch up to the girl I thought was one of the girls we fought. It was going to be a long walk back to Beacon, especially since I still don't really know the town all that well, so I went up to the bar just to get a glass of water. I swear, I just wanted some water.
"Well, I get there, and then the bartender slides this drink to me. This cold, delicious looking milkshake, topped with whipped cream and drizzled with chocolate syrup. I remember watching the condensation drip down the frosty cup and thinking, boy, that would hit the spot. She tells me it's from the girl at the end of the bar. It looked so cool and refreshing and it was such a nice gesture that I thought it would be rude to refuse it. You know how I hate being rude."
The boys knew that she hated being rude, which usually translated into her accepting drinks or invitations into beds. It was one of those little things that made May such an accidental ladykiller.
"Turns out it was a mudslide. Which, while mostly a chocolate milkshake, is actually like half Kahlua and Irish cream. You know how it goes from there."
They all nodded, because once May got a little drunk, she'd always get a lot drunk. Which meant she most likely hooked up with someone at the Clam Shack. Though, none of them knew why May was so much more embarrassed than normal.
The morning had dragged on, and May always spoke sort of slowly, taking long gaps to catch her breath and tamp her embarrassment. The dining hall had grown more full, and noisy. The doors constantly swung opened and closed, letting in a sea of mostly unfamiliar faces. Until the doors opened and revealed four familiar faces. The team of famously lovely and attractive girls from Shade Academy, NDGO. The quartet of beauties rarely failed to draw the eyes of everyone in every room they entered.
May, whose eye was sharper than the rest, spotted them first, and shrank down into herself in an earnest attempt to go unnoticed. The boys saw it, and recognized it, but the sad fact was May very rarely went unnoticed by girls.
They passed by team BRNZ's table in a quick and eager fashion. They tried to mask it beneath a breezy facade, swinging their hips and moving as smoothly as possible, but it was clearly a lie. There was no hesitation and zero nonchalance in their intent.
"Which one do you think she did," Roy asked.
They crowded around her, each sweeping a hand somewhere on her body in an easy and intimate manner as they passed.
"Oh no. She didn't. Tell me she didn't."
"She did."
"Good morning, sweetie," Nebula said. She was the leader, and clearly spoke for her entire team. "We were so surprised to find you gone this morning."
May shrugged, and flipped her head, making the little locks of hair she let dangle from her hat flick across her uncovered eye in an alluring little sweep. When she spoke, her voice was deeper and huskier than normal. "Had plans with the boys," she said.
Nebula was disappointed, as was her team, and she shrugged, but clearly thought a little more touch and a little persistence may earn her more favor. Her hand began to slip down from May's shoulder until it seemed like she was draped over her back. "That's okay, we knew what we were getting into, didn't we, ladies? But, it was a really great– team bonding exercise. I'd imagine our team coordination would only get better with more practice. You're welcome to stop by our room whenever you feel up to it."
"Yeah, maybe. I'm sure it'd be fun, but I keep pretty busy," May said with another flick of her hair. The boys could tell the little motion stoked a raging fire in the girls that they wished they knew how to even kindle.
"Don't be a stranger," Nebula said as she left, "and don't think that invitation ends when we go back to Shade. Anytime, sweetie, anytime."
They each said a farewell and batted their eyelashes at May, who gave them a courteous smile while staying mostly uninterested, and her attitude continued to pour on some oddly seductive charm that made them giggle at her.
Nolan was the first to speak when the girls were out of earshot. "What. Was. That."
They all stared at May expectantly, while she glanced around confused. "I was trying to seem cold and disinterested. I read that girls hate that."
"That wasn't cold and disinterested. That was cool and aloof and mysterious. Is that how you always act? Because I'm starting to see why you end up with so many girls."
"Do you really think that's what it is? How do I stop doing it?"
They shared a look. The boys of team BRNZ did enjoy hearing about May's exploits, and none of them were sure whether or not May actually enjoyed them. They figured if a person kept stepping on rocks and didn't like it, they might put on a pair of boots instead of getting drunk and running down cobblestone streets. May didn't seem to put any effort into not sleeping with girls. But, they were still her friends, and if she wanted to try on some boots, the least they could do was give her some socks, and maybe help lace them up.
"Okay, okay," Brawnz said first. He was the leader, and took the lead. "Let's try this. You're going to go over to them again, but this time I want you to be the exact opposite of what you just were."
It took some cajoling and support from her team to finally get her to make an attempt, along with a physical nudge in NDGO's direction.
A few moments after she set out, Roy turned to Brawnz with a concerned expression. "Hey, wouldn't the opposite of cold and aloof be warm and interested?"
They all shared a horrified look.
She chatted with them for a few minutes. May was more visibly nervous, her cheeks red and her exposed eye more shaded than usually. She seemed to stumble over words. The boys immediately saw the problem. May was acting too damn adorable for her own good. They at least hoped that since NDGO were attracted by May acting like a mysterious beauty, they would be turned away by the shy act. May shook her head. Then nodded. Then she came back to their table despondent.
"They're now my girlfriends."
"What? Girlfriends?" Brawnz asked.
"Yeah. They collectively decided that it was sweet that I was trying to act cool, and that I must like them a lot to come clean, and then they collectively decided they wanted to date me, collectively."
"But why would you agree?"
"I got mixed up and answered wrong. They got me with one of those would-you-mind traps. And they got so excited and happy, I couldn't just take it back. It would have been rude. "
"Okay. That didn't work."
May looked displeased with herself, and the boys figured that even if she really was gay, having four girlfriends would be a headache, no matter how attractive and accepting of the situation they were. Just one was enough trouble for them, and having four, while it may sound like some teenage dream, would likely be a nightmare in reality.
Roy chimed in this time. "I got it. They're your girlfriends, right? So they'll be really mad if they see you hit on another girl. So what you gotta do is hit on the next girl who comes in the door."
May seemed interested in the idea, for a moment, then shook her head. "But what about the girl I hit on? I think the odds favor her liking me."
They nodded, surprised at the moment of self awareness from the normally oblivious girl. Roy snapped his fingers. "You gotta be real nerdy. Like, go way overboard talking about one really weird interest."
That idea seemed reasonable, and May finally agreed to the plan. But they had trouble deciding what she was going to talk about. Her interests simply weren't nerdy enough. May was a talented athlete (softball and field hockey, of course), played acoustic guitar with a lovely and raspy voice to back it up, and loved to cook and bake. Her macaron was praised by the finest confectioners in Vacuo as the best in the kingdom. They were a pair of sisters who ran an award winning bakery, whom she slept with after sampling what turned out to be a rum filled chocolate ball. It never occurred to the boys that the sisters might not be talking about a literal cookie.
Roy snapped his fingers. "Guns. You're obsessed with guns. My girlfriend hates when I talk about weapons. If you go up to a girl and can't shut up about guns, they'll think you're a giant nerd and you'll get shot down."
"You're sure?"
"Definitely."
May nodded, and watched the door. The morning had dragged on, and there was no longer a crowd. NDGO seemed to still be eating, though they were likely slowed by the constant glances towards May, who hadn't noticed. The only people who would be coming to the dining hall would be the late risers. The next girl who came into the hall usually woke early, but had allowed herself to sleep as a reward for a good performance in the first round of the tournament. She looked young, even for a first year student, but May still steeled herself and decided to go through with the plan.
May stood from her seat and approached Ruby Rose, who was checking her scroll to see when her own team would be arriving.
"Ah shit," Nolan said. "This is a combat academy. The girls here are huntresses in training. I'd bet twenty bucks you couldn't find a girl here that wasn't interested in guns. Hell, there's probably a few who are just as obsessed over guns as her."
In the distance, May pointed at the girl's weapon, and the girl proudly unsheathed it and let it transform into a large rifle. Playing her part well, May fawned over it, showing Ruby her own weapon. They spoke, and their hands waved wildly, and their high pitched excited squeaks echoed through the large hall. The plan was a complete failure; not only was the girl very much interested, but the moment May made her move Octavia had received a message on her scroll, with an attached picture of her little brothers new puppy, and team NDGO completely missed the whole event.
May returned with a dejected look. "I'm going to an underground weapon shop with and getting dinner afterward. Don't give me that look, they carry a brand of parts I've been looking for forever! She knew how excited I was to find it, it would have been very rude to say no."
There was a collective groan, and May banged her head against the table. Her team felt especially bad, because their intervention seemed to only be making things worse, which led them questioning why they themselves had such difficulty with girls, their own courtships having been awkward and long but much more romantic tales. Though they knew what worked for May would never work for themselves.
Nolan came up with an idea he thought might be extreme enough to help May actually repel a girl. "Next girl who walks in, just walk up and slap her ass. Get a big handful of that booty."
May looked horrified, as did Brawnz and Roy. But soon enough the other boys nodded. "No girl could enjoy that," they confirmed.
"I don't know, I don't mind when girls do that to me," May answered without thinking, "When I'm drunk. Only when I'm drunk. Because I'm straight," she added with a quick and squeaky voice.
They insisted it would work. The other girls would all think her a pig. Her date would be canceled. Her girlfriends would break up with her. It was foolproof, they claimed, and shoved her up and towards the door when it swung open and a blonde with long messy hair strolled in, looking around for her team.
May took a deep gulp and walked across the room. Her hand was in the air when Ruby received a message from Blake that she'd be coming to breakfast soon and Octavia received a video of the puppy sleeping curled into the family cat. The hand hit. May had given Yang a big open hand pat on the rear, her hand having slipped beneath the hanging layers of cloth right into Yang's tight stretchy shorts, and she let it linger solely to make the act seem more genuine and certainly not because of how the soft but firm flesh felt.
The girl grabbed May by the ear and dragged her over to a table, flinging her down angrily. May, and her whole team, watched with fear as the girl silently huffed over may, the air whistling through her nose like a bull seeing red. But Yang looked her up and down, and let her anger out in the form of a sigh. The boys hearts began to feel icy, and they had a feeling that this was about to go as wrong as the other plans.
"You're lucky," Yang said, "that I'm not pounding you into the ground."
May blinked. "It worked? It worked! Finally, a girl who doesn't find me ridiculously attractive."
Yang snorted. "Well it sounds like you think pretty highly of yourself. I'll admit, you're kinda cute, almost cute enough that I wouldn't mind you harassing me a bit, but you remind me too much of my sister." Yang pointed a thumb over at Ruby, who was busy responding to the message from Blake.
"Huh? I don't really think I look anything like her."
Yang looked May up and down again, and suddenly May didn't like the glint in her eye.
"Wait, I didn't say that. I look just like her. The two of us could be twins."
Yang had already sat beside May, and was leaning into her, her own little move that showcased her best assets. "I don't normally like such forward girls. By the way, what did you think of my shorts? Know what they're made of?"
May shook her head, confused more than anything. Yang grabbed her hand and brought it down onto the black fabric.
"Girlfriend material."
The message to Blake had been sent, and the girls of team NDGO had seen enough cute puppy, and suddenly the whole dining hall descended into chaos. Ruby jumped first, shouting at her sister, and soon the two began to argue with May in the middle. Then, the four girls of team NDGO piled in and threatened both of them to stay away from their girlfriend, shocking and confusing the two other girls, but not enough for them to relent.
May slipped away from the mob of girls fighting over her and back to her table. "I hate you guys. No more help. I mean it, your advice is terrible."
"I think it would have worked for anyone but you," Brawnz said, a sentiment his teammates echoed. "You're not just a girl magnet. You're like some sort of nuclear powered lesbian electromagnet. If we throw a girl anywhere in your general direction she sticks right to you."
May's fingertips went wormed their way into the rim of her beanie, but she didn't pull it down yet. Behind her, the door busted open and two more girls marched in. One was Blake, whom May had met in Beacon's library on her first night in Vale. She had accidentally eaten vodka infused gummy bears at a welcome party without realizing, and thought she may not end up in a strange girl's bed if she went somewhere boring. It hadn't worked. Blake saw her but didn't wave out of embarrassment. The other May hadn't met yet.
Weiss set out to scold her teammates, and even spat a few choice comments towards NDGO about poorly representing their academy. She dragged Yang and Ruby apart, and manage to cool the situation.
The boys of BRNZ saw Weiss, and felt no stirrings of attraction. They knew she was a beauty, even if she was lacking in certain places, but there was simply no reaction in them. It was the same void of attraction they felt towards May, who barely seemed like a girl to them. It was one of the great mysteries of her popularity.
The truth was May had a face perfectly between 'handsome' and 'cute,' cut in such a way that the angle you saw her from and her attitude and mood at the time could completely change the quality of her looks to whatever type a girl might like. It made May like a magical mirror that always showed girls only what they desired, completely by accident if one was inclined to believe her. Around her team, she was so nonchalant that she came across as very plain and shy. Still, their lack of attraction to the beautiful white haired girl seemed very odd.
May hadn't noticed that the fight had ended. She told her teammates "I should say something," and turned to intervene. Then she caught sight of Weiss.
Her team, who could only see May's back, could see her take one, long, huge breath, so large her shoulders rose and didn't come back down and so deep it almost felt as though there was a little less air in the room. May scurried back to the table and properly pulled her hat down over her eyes. Her face turned a deep crimson. She released her breath in one long and slow and smooth puff. Brawnz, who sat closest to May, swore he could see her rapid pulse in her neck.
"Guys, I think I might be gay."