December 27th, 1979
The holidays were over, and the house was once again quiet. It always made Ed a little sad when a large chunk of the family went back to Central. He was grateful for the faster trains, and roadways, that made the trip shorter than it used to be. He and Winry were already plotting a visit to Central in the couple of months.
The only mild damper on the holidays, and really one was a blessing, were the people who couldn't make it, or hadn't shown up. Even Ed had silently hoped that, against all odds, Urey would show up on the doorstep with the rest of the family. When he hadn't, very few people had wanted to bring him up, though they exclaimed over Yurian and played with him for hours. At eight-and-a-half months, he was crawling everywhere now, and pulling himself up, though not yet standing.
The others who hadn't made it were Trisha and Roy and little Rosa, but that was because Trisha had gone into labor four days before they were supposed to come, and given birth to their son, whom they had named Gabriel. They had stayed behind and celebrated the winter holiday with Roy's family instead.
It was early evening, and Ed was content to be cuddled up on the couch with Winry, watching an old movie that was finally being broadcast in a television format. "This is just as good as I remember," he commented as it came to an end.
"And as romantic," Winry smiled. "I remember when we saw it. We had to get Al to watch Sara."
"I remember that," Ed chuckled. "I almost felt bad for him, getting to change that diaper."
"Only almost?"
"Well it wasn't like we didn't have to face the bad ones on a regular basis," Ed pointed out. "Though they don't seem nearly so bad in retrospect."
"We've seen more than our share." Winry smiled, though to Ed it looked a little sad, and he didn't have to ask why. They had taken on a good amount of the Yurian watching, since Ted and Callie had school and Aldon and Cassie both had jobs that needed their attention, though the boy still lived with his grandparents.
"We sure have," Ed agreed. "Though I can't say that I mind."
The phone began to ring.
"We could ignore it," Winry suggested wistfully, her head still on his shoulder.
"Or it could be Art telling us Deanna's in labor," Ed pointed out. Just because she wasn't due until January didn't mean the baby might not come in his or her own time.
"I hate it when you're right," Winry grumbled as Ed stood up and went for the phone.
"Then you must get irritated often," Ed teased as he picked up the receiver. "Elrics, Ed speaking."
"Edward, this is Silvia."
"Well, this is a pleasant surprise," Ed said honestly. It wasn't like Lia's mother to give them a call, though she had called just a couple of days before to wish everyone a good holiday and speak with Ethan, Lia, and anyone else who wanted to talk to her. "Can I help you?"
"Actually, I thought I might be able to help you," Silvia replied, though she sounded uncertain. "I think I saw Urey."
"What?" Ed almost dropped the phone in surprise. "In South City?"
"Yes. This afternoon. I was doing my shopping downtown and I could have sworn I saw him getting into a city electrical truck."
"And you're sure it was him?" Ed wanted to believe it. After so long with no leads, not even from the government investigative end…
"Not entirely," Silvia admitted hesitantly. "But it looked so much like him, I thought it was worth mentioning. I also looked up the phone number for the company. I thought it might be helpful."
Ed scrambled for paper and a pen and copied down the number as she read it off for him. "Yes! Thank you, Silvia. Thank you!"
"What is it, Ed?" Winry asked, peering over the couch with a confused expression.
"A lead." Ed almost laughed when he hung up. A grin seemed plastered on his face. It was a very small lead, but it was something. It was too late to call the company tonight, but tomorrow… tomorrow might just be the break they needed. It was the same heady rush of elation he had felt as a young man, whenever he and Al thought they had a new lead on the Philosopher's stone. Only this… this was much more important.
December 28th, 1979
"I wish I was going with you," Aldon said as Ed stood on the train platform waiting for the first train towards South City.
"Resembool needs its Mayor," Ed replied, though he understood his son's impatience with the situation. All this time, worrying, taking care of Yurian. He had called the company first thing that morning, and while they didn't have a Urey Elric, they had a man going by Urey Silverman who matched the description fairly closely. Given that was Cassie's maiden name, Ed was willing to make the trip. He had a hunch that Silvia's observance was going to pay off, and he had a lot of things he wanted to say to his grandson and alchemy student. "Besides, if this turns out well, you'll have plenty of time to talk to Urey when I drag his ass home."
"I hope so. He may not agree to come home, if it's him."
Ed gave his son a hug, and Cassie, and Winry, and then little Yurian. "Well I'll do my best," he said, then snorted. "Listen to us. That's enough with the defeatist attitudes. I'm going to find Urey and give him a piece of my mind. Now you all enjoy the New Year, and let's all hope the coming one is better than a lot of this one."
January 3rd, 1980
South City wasn't much warmer than Resembool in January, though it seemed far more prone to winter rains than the occasional snow to which Ed had become accustomed. He got off the train and went straight to the electric company, only to find out that Urey hadn't come in to work that day as it was his scheduled day off. Regretfully, their main office explained, they couldn't violate employee privacy by giving out addresses or phone numbers.
Frustrated, Ed stepped back outside.
"Excuse me, Mr. Elric?" An employee with short, dark hair, still in his electrician's uniform, followed him down the stairs.
"Yes?" Ed turned to him, not sure he dared hope for help. He was ready to scour South City if need be, but it would take forever.
"I'm Dan," he held out his hand, and on it was a small slip of paper. "Urey's my partner on the job. I don't know what's up with him. He does his work no problems, but there's something he won't tell me. Well, a lot of things. He doesn't socialize with anyone. Here's his address and phone number, though he never answers the phone so I wouldn't bother."
Not willing to disbelieve his own luck, Ed took the slip of paper and opened it. The address wasn't too far away, if he remembered the layout of the city correctly. Walking distance for sure. "I can imagine he wouldn't say much," he said softly. "Thank you, Dan. But why help me against company policy?"
"Because I'm worried about him," Dan admitted. "There's just something… off about him. Something dead in his eyes."
Yeah, I know. Ed nodded and shook the younger man's hand. "Well, thanks. I doubt he'll thank you, but as family, you can't know how much this means."
It didn't take long to walk the few short blocks to a ramshackle apartment complex in a neighborhood Ed wasn't sure he'd have wanted to walk through except in broad daylight. Urey's apartment was up two flights of questionable stairs, and at the end of a long hallway. Ed ignored the cockroach in the hallway.
The apartment labeled G4 had a door with peeling green paint, and sat slightly askew on its hinges. Ed knocked, but after a few minutes of no response, clapped his hands together and used alchemy to jimmy the lock. Once the door was open, he fixed it and went inside.
There was no one home, unless Ed wanted to count more roaches. It was tiny apartment; only two rooms, with a kitchenette on one wall of the first, the bed on the other, and a tiny bathroom off to one side. The bed had a blanket, and a lumpy mattress, but no sheets, and the dingy laminate table held stacks of papers, books, empty cartons, and the overflowing trash can sat underneath it, holding old take-out containers and the occasional brown bottle.
Even in utter squalor, there were books. Ed shook his head, and went over to the table, where he started sifting through the books and scribbled notes.
Almost immediately his blood ran cold. Some of these notes were in his own hand. Half of the other sheets were circles of varying types and degrees, but all of them were variants on a very specific set of circles. Damn it, Urey. Ed felt a mix of shock and fury flood his system. I thought you weren't stupid enough to try human transmutation!
The door creaked, and Ed turned.
The young man in the doorway stared at him, bleary eyed and disbelieving, over an armload of paper sacks, which seemed to hold a meager mix of groceries, take-out food, and a couple of books in a sack.
It was Urey, but Ed was surprised Silvia had recognized him, worn thin to little but bone, hallow-cheeked and ill looking, bloodshot eyes and dark circles. "What…" Urey asked then cleared his throat. "What are you doing here?"
In a moment, Ed had let his fury take him, and he strode across the room, shoving a handful of papers in Urey's face. "Human Transmutation! Are you insane?" he went off on his grandson with months of pent up fury. "You can't bring her back, Urey! I thought you understood this. No one can come back. It's taboo for a reason. You want to create a homunculus? You want to ruin any chance you have at having a normal life? It's not too late! Cayla wouldn't want it to be like this. I have half a mind to-"
"Grandpa," Urey spoke the word softly, but his expression showed no anger, merely frustration.
"-drag you home where I-"
"Grandpa!"
Ed stopped. "Well? Explain this in a way that doesn't make me want to kick your ass!"
Urey set down the bags on the table. "I'm not trying to bring her back, Grandpa."
Unsure what to make of that, Ed gestured around the room. "Then what's all this for?"
"I… I just want to go to her."
Dismay and horror filled him in equal measure as Ed took in what Urey meant. Urey wanted to throw himself through the portal… "You can't do that!"
"Why not?" Urey asked quietly. "It's my life."
"It doesn't work that way," Ed objected.
"How do you know?"
Ed sighed, the impetus to yell gone in the face of a heartbroken man. "Because I've been through the portal. On the other side, if you make it, is the other world. I've told you that. Going there would do nothing for you. If you stayed inside, you'd be trapped. Souls don't get to move on from the gate."
Urey shook his head and reached for his stack of notes. "I may have figured out how to do it differently."
Edward reached out and stayed his hand. "Urey, Cayla's gone. And I'm not going to let you commit suicide with alchemy. Only you probably wouldn't die. You'd be trapped, or sent through. Either way you won't find what you're looking for, and you have far more chance of finding something worse."
Urey stared at him and the seconds dragged into minutes. Through his eyes, Ed could see the war going on in his grandson; despair, denial, self-hatred. He knew it too well, but he let Urey battle it. He had to. He couldn't keep going like this, and Ed wasn't about to let him just throw everything away. Finally, Urey began to quiver, and he collapsed, dropping into a rickety chair that creaked dangerously. His shoulders shook. "I can't do this, Grandpa." The words came out in a hoarse whisper.
"What, live?" Edward asked. "I know it feels hopeless, Urey. Losing someone you love is painful. It's always painful. But you can't give up."
"Too late."
Irritation flashed. "Then why are you still here?" Ed asked harshly.
"What?" Urey looked up at him, startled.
"If you've given up, then why do you still work every day? Why do you bother renting an apartment? Why eat? Why sleep? If you really wanted to die than you'd have done it already." Ed picked up one of the empty liquor bottles on the table. "You're hurting, and you're depressed. That means you're still alive. It's only when you hurt so much you go numb that you need to worry."
"Grandpa I…"
"Why don't you come home, Urey? We miss you, and everyone's worried." He took the chance the boy might be listening. He seemed to be. Ed could hope. "Your parents are going crazy without you, not knowing where you are, and raising Yurian."
Urey hesitated, then shook his head. "I'm not ready."
Ed snorted. "If you wait until you're ready your son will be in college."
That seemed to strike a nerve. For several seconds, Urey stared down at his hands. "How… how is he?"
"Nine months of giggling joy," Ed replied, his expression softening. "He's a great kid. I bet he misses you too."
"How can you miss someone you barely know?" Urey jerked to his feet and stumbled towards the ancient little refrigerator. He opened the door and reached for the nearest bottle.
Ed followed and reached out, his hand resting on top of the bottle. "Because you love him and because until he was born, you were the one who took care of his mother, who loved her, and who loved him most. That means something, even if a baby can't understand it. He's your son, Urey. You'll regret it if you miss out on his life."
"How do you know?"
Ed locked eyes with his grandson. "Because my father regretted it. Because I regret every pain I've ever caused my children; my whole family. No one wants to force you into anything too soon, but you're missing out on what could be wonderful times for you both. Running away does nothing but cause pain for him and for you."
Urey tugged the bottle away from Ed. "I'm no kind of a father. He'd be better off with Art, or Mom and Dad, or even you and Granny."
"You're already a father; How good you are at it remains to be seen." Ed stepped back. "I've said a lot. Think about it. Can I visit tomorrow?"
Urey didn't look at him for a long time. "Yeah, I guess so. Where are you staying?"
"A hotel downtown." Ed snatched up the pile of alchemy notes on the table, books and sketches and all and dumped them in a couple of empty sacks as he headed for the door. "I'll be keeping these. Oh, and Urey, eat something real. You look malnourished."
That elicited a short, dry laugh. "I never thought I'd hear that."