Chapter 17
Damn it, but Kitt was tired!
He forced his exhausted, gritty eyes to
stay open. He sat on the sofa in his
cabin, dressed in his starched Wranglers
and freshly ironed button down. Austin's
last text message said they were headed
back hours ago. Kitt assumed Austin
intended to come by the cabin since his
agent came back home with him. Clearly
he got that assumption wrong. Maybe he
should have gone over to Austin's.
Maybe they wouldn't be spending time
together until the agent left. At this point,
who knew for sure, but as the hour grew
later, Kitt finally gave in to the lack of
sleep over the last few days and
undressed.
He worked his clothes off slowly,
walking through his small place blowing
out the candles he'd lit, and put the iced
bottle of Austin's favorite wine back in
the refrigerator. He turned off the burner
warming dinner. Whatever, he'd tried
for a little romance.
As he stretched out on his bed, Kitt
kept his phone close to him ignoring the
ache in his heart. Austin had texted him
every few hours for the last three days,
but he hadn't heard anything for hours
now. It was late, too late. Maybe Austin
got home and just went to bed like he
should have done. Damn, he wanted to
see Austin tonight. The late, late, late
show came to an end as Kitt's eyes
closed completely. Too many days of
burning it at both ends caught up with
him. He fell asleep with the lights and
TV on and his phone in his hand.
Seth didn't get much more than a 'the
door on the left is the spare bedroom'
before Austin hightailed it out of the
rental car and to the barn to jump on his
four-wheeler. An unexpected traffic jam
from an eight car pileup slowed them for
hours on a highway in the middle of
Nowhere, Texas. And Nowhere, Texas
had no cellphone signal at all. It was
after midnight before they were routed to
the back roads off the highway making
the already long trip much longer.
Security had stayed vigilant, watching
the property the entire time he was gone.
Nothing changed in their responsibility
to his sanctuary. He drove the fourwheeler
out of the barn, darting straight
to Kitt's cabin, a hundred percent certain
they were watching him right now. His
anxiety levels were off the charts and
under the exhausted state he currently
maintained, there was no choice but to
go see Kitt. As he got closer, it occurred
to him that Kitt might be in the barn. He
seemed to spend an extraordinary
amount of time there over the last few
days. Austin could see some back lights
on in the house, but no activity. Kitt's
truck sat outside. He slowed his ride,
pulling to the fence, not caring about the
noise he made.
Austin climbed the fence before
jogging the distance between the fence
and the house. He didn't knock. Kitt
always left the door unlocked. He
slowly opened the door and waited,
listening. He heard the faint sounds of a
soft snore coming from Kitt's bedroom.
The lights were off in the main part of
the house. Austin snuck in seeing two
wine glasses sitting out, a set table and a
plate of food on the stovetop. The other
plate was empty in the sink. Relief
flooded him, Kitt had been waiting for
him!
Austin walked silently through the
living room toward Kitt's bedroom. Just
the television and night stand lamp were
on. Austin toed off his shoes, then
carefully and quietly tiptoed his way to
the bed, shedding his clothing as he
went. As he passed the television, he
turned it off and watched Kitt who never
stirred. Odd for the usually light sleeper.
Austin decided to leave the lamp on.
Kitt stayed sleeping with small little
soft snores coming from him every
minute or two. Those were the times
Austin moved. He kept his eyes trained
on the handsome, beautiful man lying on
top of the covers, sleeping in his tighty
whities. A depth of emotion Austin had
never experienced before hit him hard. It
caused him to stop in his tracks as he
started to slide on to the bed. His heart
hammered and he stared hard at Kitt.
The emotion welling inside him was real
and complete. Austin knew immediately
what was going on, but he also knew
Kitt would want no part of it. Which
didn't seem to change anything inside his
heart.
Kitt finally stirred as Austin lay on
the bed, coming fully awake with a
startled jerk when he realized he wasn't
alone. "What the—"
"I tried not to wake you." Austin
paused as he lowered, but kept going,
wanting to hold and be held by Kitt.
"You scared the crap out of me," Kitt
said lying back on his pillow. He
absently ran a hand over his heart.
Austin scooted over, not quite touching
Kitt, but close enough to lean in and give
a slow chaste kiss.
"I missed you and I'm exhausted. It
took forever to get home. I wanted to
sleep in your arms for a few hours and
then maybe make love to you before you
made me go face the entire day without
you." Austin kept his tone light, hiding
his feelings while giving his most
sorrowful expression, and Kitt narrowed
his eyes.
"I saw that exact same look in your
last movie when your pup died… It was
so sad." Kitt rolled his eyes before he
scooted over, kicking at the covers with
his feet as he held his arms open to
Austin.
Austin reached down to bring the
bedspread up, covering them as he went
to lie on Kitt's chest. He angled himself
where he laid with his head in the crook
of Kitt's neck. "You snore," Austin
whispered simply.
The comfort of being in Kitt's arms
erased every bit of anxiety, leaving just
the exhaustion behind. It occurred to
Austin, this was another new thing for
them. They never lay in bed unless they
were fucking. Before tonight, it hadn't
been allowed.
"I've heard that before," Kitt said
dryly, running his fingertips up and down
Austin's back. Their legs tangled
together. Austin could feel Kitt was half
aroused, but the need to hold the other
seemed viably more important.
"Did Fisker complain about it?"
Austin let his obvious jealousy out in the
words and Kitt chuckled.
"No, Mr. Looking for Pool Boys to
Fuck. My sisters tell me. It's one of the
reasons I'm down here. I can get loud
during sinus season apparently," Kitt
said and kissed the top of Austin's head.
He wrapped Austin tighter in his arms,
turning partly to face Austin. They
shared a pillow and he yawned.
"You'll enjoy that immensely, I'm
sure." Kitt reached over and pushed the
button on the lamp to turn the light off.
"Mmm… Is this the first fault I've
found in Kitt Kelly?" Austin moved with
Kitt's body as the light turned off.
"I don't think it's the first," Kitt said
quietly into the dark.
"I do." Austin lifted his head. He rose
fully to place a light kiss on Kitt's lips.
"You need to sleep."
"I think it's you that needs to sleep. I
can't see where you've had much in the
last few days. You messaged me like
every two hours."
"How can I sleep when your lips are
so close?" Again, Austin leaned in and
kissed Kitt softly, this time adding a
small amount of tongue. The kiss
lingered until he rested his head on
Kitt's shoulder and sleep took them both.
It took a second for Kitt to realize the
vibration that woke him came from his
phone lying under his pillow. He
automatically turned to check the time on
his alarm clock. Four minutes before the
alarm was scheduled to go off.
Austin slept with his head on Kitt's
chest and his breath warmed his skin
with every exhale. Kitt dug underneath
the pillow until he found the phone as it
vibrated again sending another message.
He'd missed four incoming calls. His
phone must have silenced at some point
during the night but the vibration
worked. It took time for his eyes to
adjust to the bright light of the lit screen
as he read the message. He reached over
with the other arm to turn the alarm off
so it didn't wake Austin.
Jose thought Lady was showing signs
of birthing. Well, of course she was!
Today was one of the busiest days of
Kitt's year. They'd start cutting hay and
it required every one of his hands to help
in the fields. Of course she would pick
today. Kitt carefully pulled out from
underneath Austin who only stirred
awake long enough to hear Kitt say he
was going to the restroom. Kitt stuffed a
pillow back in his place watching as
Austin took the bait and pulled the
pillow against his chest, instantly falling
back asleep. Kitt grabbed his clothes
and boots and left the bedroom, shutting
the door behind him. He dressed
quickly, not bothering brushing his hair
or teeth. He penned a quick note to
Austin and grabbed a ball cap.
The ride to the barn was a quick one
and several of his regular ranch hands
were already there. He pulled to the
front, barely getting the truck in park
before jumping out. Kitt all but jogged
inside the barn doing the math again in
his mind on her delivery date. She was
too early. Even with the signs of her
tightening and her udder dropping, Kitt
still thought they had a week, and even
that would have been a couple of weeks
early.
It being her first birth, they had no
history with this mare. Horses foaled
early all the time, but three weeks – it
concerned him.
"Shit," he muttered opening the barn
door. He mentally checked off his men
trying to decide which one would be
best to leave behind for the day and keep
an eye on Lady. Nothing changed as he
went through the list, Jose was the only
one he trusted enough to stay behind, but
he was also the only one who could put
in a double day's work in eight hours.
"How she doing?" He asked as he met
Jose halfway to her stall.
"It's just startin'. She should have a
while," he said, pivoting on his feet.
Jose wasn't a tall man, but kept Kitt's
pace, double stepping each of his steps.
"Did you call Doc? Have him on
standby?" Kitt asked opening the gate.
"Yes, sir." Jose stayed back with
all the other men staring over the stall
gate watching Kitt adjust his ball cap for
her.
"Good. Thanks for callin' me," Kitt
said absently, his tone getting softer as
he entered. He walked the few steps to
Lady. He held her attention since she
heard him in the barn, nodding her
palomino head at him as he entered, as if
she'd been expecting him, waiting for
him to get there.
"Hey sweet girl, you gettin' ready for
your big day, or is this one of those false
starts that gets us all worked up?" Kitt
asked as he began to rub her gently. He
petted her down to her swollen belly,
gently touching her udder before moving
toward her front. He could feel her
tighter, but there was no sign of her milk.
The foal moved a little under his touch.
"Yeah, you're close. You know you
could've waited until your due date. It
would've helped me out a lot," Kitt said,
still in the calm sweet tone he used with
her. He was right in her face now,
looking into her eyes, rubbing her head,
and she bent into him knocking his ball
cap off his head.
"She's close. So here's the change for
the day. Jose, I'm gonna need you to stay
with her. Get Doc out here to do an
exam. Call me when's he's done or if
anythin' changes. I'll stay with her
tonight. Maybe by tomorrow we'll have
a newborn. Her momma's records show
she was in labor for a full forty eight
hours before she was born. Let's see if
that holds, but I don't want her left
alone." Kitt said it all carefully, keeping
his tone calm. He rubbed her down as he
spoke, picking up his ball cap. He
angled it on his head as he rose and let
her knock it off again before he rubbed
down her nose one last time.
"Lady, you still got jokes even now,
huh? You wait until I'm here to have this
little guy, you hear me?" Kitt asked. He
patted her belly one last time before he
left the stall.
"Boss, are you sure? I can help you
today," Jose asked. Kitt lifted his ball
cap and scrubbed his head thinking over
the possibilities.
"No, I can't take the chance. She
needs someone who knows her. You
stay." Kitt looked around at all his men
waiting for him to begin. "Let's get
goin'. It's gonna be a day. I need
coffee."
"Yes, sir!" His newest, least
experienced, field hand said.
Everyone scattered as he started
toward the small break room in the back
of the barn. He moved through the men
lifting an arm to his nose. Kitt could
smell Austin on him, his cologne
lingered, and it wasn't a bad thing.
He poured his coffee, bent his head
down to smell his chest, smiling when he
thought of Austin sneaking in to sleep in
his arms. No matter how he fought it, it
wasn't just about sex with them
anymore. Austin was comfortable
enough in his home to sleep. Actually,
Austin left his own home to come sleep
in Kitt's home. Austin still slept in his
bed and for whatever odd reason it felt
deeply gratifying.
He took a long drink of the coffee and
left the break room. For the first time
since leaving his house, he felt the chill
in the air. They kept this barn reasonably
climate controlled, but the doors were
open, and everyone was preparing to
leave. Jose stood at the front, giving out
directions, speaking Spanish to most of
the men. It was times like these Kitt
wanted to hug Jose. His foreman was
worth every dime of his salary. Kitt had
taken Spanish in school for years, and
although he understood most of what
was being said, he still sounded like a
complete dumbass trying to talk to the
guys himself.
"Okay Boss, Jesus is bilingual. He's
staying close by you. You tell him when
you need something done and he'll get it
done for you. Jorge's and his crew are
taking the other cutters out. Half the
crew's going with him over to Smith's
place."
"Thanks, man. Call me if anythin'
changes," Kitt said walking out the door
Jose held open.
"Boss, you should let me do this and
you stay with her." Jose followed him
out the door closing it behind them. Kitt
never slowed until he put his Styrofoam
cup on the hood of his truck and climbed
inside the driver's seat, digging around
the truck for his jacket.
"Keep a close eye on her and take
care of things around here. You can go
tomorrow. I'll stay. I'm thinkin' we have
time, but call me when Doc gets here.
Tell Lily we'll be back at lunch."
They had ten fields scheduled for
today and hundreds and hundreds of
acres to cover in the next twelve hours.
The sun was just starting to rise and they
needed to be in the first field by the time
daylight hit full on. Kitt shrugged on his
jacket and grabbed his coffee. He took
another big gulp, letting the scalding
brew burn its way down and warm him
up. He headed for the tractor with the
cutter ready to go.
It was a slow drive. The tractor
topped out at thirty miles an hour. The
men followed behind him. It couldn't
have been much past six in the morning,
and as Kitt pulled off the road making a
wide turn into the driveway, his phone
rang.
"This is an awfully long bathroom
break. You left me sleeping and I was so
hopin' for a little good morning sex this
morning," Austin said with a distinct
whine in his tired voice. "Where are
you? I can come to you, do you, and then
leave before anyone sees me." The last
part was said on a deep yawn. The
engine to the tractor churned so loud Kitt
turned the speaker on and the volume up
as loud as it would go, and he still
needed to shove the phone inside his ear
to hear.
"I got a call. Lady's just beginnin' to
foal and I'm already pullin' into the
Henderson's to start cuttin'. Hold on,"
Kitt yelled into the phone over the sound
of the engine. He pulled to the far right
of the Henderson's property line and
came to stop, letting the tractor idle. He
watched in his rear view mirror as the
men lined up beside him positioning
themselves to work behind him as he cut.
One ran forward to get the gate opened
for his entry. Every so often a movement
would cause Austin's scent to drift up
and an involuntary smile would form
without him even realizing it was there.
"I'm back," Kitt said, again shoving
the phone in his ear to hear.
"Is she okay? Does it mess up your
day?" Austin asked
"I think I have to watch her tonight.
Jose stayed behind with her. Today's
gonna be longer without him out here,
but I need to keep an eye on her," Kitt
said. He could see everyone was behind
him waiting for him to start, but he
missed Austin and loved knowing he
was talking to him right now while still
lying in his bed.
"Anything I can do to help? Mike can
come over so Jose can help you today,"
Austin offered.
"Nah, Jose knows her as well as I do.
She needs someone she knows and who
knows her. Jose's just a worker. He can
outwork anybody, but I'm staffed up.
Actually, overly staffed. It should be
fine," he said. "I'll call if I can't get it
done. I gotta go."
"I'll be thinking about my missed
opportunity. I should have jumped you
last night when I had the chance," Austin
said.
"Stay longer and get some rest. You
need it." Kitt was just as unwilling to
end the call as Austin seemed to be.
They sat there a minute quietly, not
saying goodbye.
"I might do that. I can smell your
cologne all over these pillows. I might
have to take one of these home with me,"
Austin finally said.
Kitt didn't respond. He'd been
smelling Austin all morning on him, and
mentally weighed whether to say it out
loud or not, but he decided to keep quiet,
not able to find the very simple words to
say.
"I love it when you get quiet, Kitt. I'm
beginning to understand it happens when
I unnerve you… And that feels really
good."
"I'll talk to you later," Kitt said
simply.
"Goodbye, be careful today. Let me
know if you us."
"Bye." Kitt forced himself to drop the
phone in the cup holder next to the
coffee. His eyes darted up to the
rearview mirror and he rolled his eyes
at the blush on his cheeks and the smile
on his face. His cock was rigidly hard.
Dear God, did he have it bad. Kitt
picked up the coffee cup and carefully
took a drink, then smelled the cologne
lingering on his shirt.
"Damn, it's gonna be a long day!" Kitt
positioned the tractor and adjusted
himself in the seat as he pulled forward
starting to cut the miles of overgrown
hay in front of him.
"You're in love," Seth declared as
Austin came through the back door.
"You've been making fun of me for the
last forty eight hours and here you're
grinning, whistling, acting like life
couldn't get any better in this
aloneness… In the desert. Texas is a
dust bowl, so not the heaven you've
made it out to be." Seth was kicked back
on the sofa, with the television on and
laptop in his lap. It was noonish and
Seth already looked bored as hell.
"As normal, you have no idea what
you're talkin' about." Austin quipped
walking through the house deciding Kitt
should be the first one to hear he carried
that emotion, not anyone else.
He'd stayed at Kitt's most of the
morning. Made himself breakfast and
just stayed in Kitt's stuff until he forced
himself out. He only did a little bit of
pillaging through Kitt's belongings. And
only because he found an interesting
stash of his photos and movies hidden in
the bottom drawer of Kitt's night stand.
At some point, Austin would definitely
be getting some kind of explanation
about those. Of course it would have to
come after he figured out how to say
he'd seen them under the stacks of
hunting and fishing magazines and still
buried further under the accounting
folders of the farm.
"It's either love or a long night of
great sex confusing itself as love," Seth
said, watching Austin closely. After a
second his eyes narrowed and he bent
his head to the side to watch Austin
closer as he made his way to the coffee
pot.
"I didn't have sex at all last night. I
slept until about ten this morning and just
hung out alone until a little while ago.
Ever think I need a break from your love
sick ass? I haven't spent this much time
with you in years. And now I remember
why…" Austin waggled his brows at
Seth and poured himself a cup of coffee.
"Huh. You're already starting to get
your accent back." That caused Seth to
put the laptop down and turn completely
around, eyes fully trained on Austin.
"How'd I miss this?"
"What?" Austin asked, cocking a
brow. He leaned back against the sink
and concentrated. He was an
accomplished, award winning actor, he
needed to find his 'you're wrong face',
but he really didn't want to hide it.
"At first I was giving you shit, but
now… It is more than a regular fuck,
isn't it?"
"Yes, it's more than a regular fuck. I
told you that when we were sitting with
Cara," Austin said, nodding his head and
pronouncing each word correctly. He
took a drink of his coffee, his eyes
stayed on Seth trying to gauge his
reaction. For everything Austin had said
about someday coming out, talking about
it made him nervous, and Seth was one
of the only people on the planet he'd
actually told he liked doing guys.
"I didn't really pay attention. Is it
love?" Seth wasn't going to let it go.
"We haven't gone there, and I've
known him a long time, but not really. I
just re-met him when I moved back."
Austin moved into the living room.
"And this is the cowboy all over the
security reports? He lives close?" Seth
tracked Austin with his eyes as he came
to sit down in a chair near the sofa. The
TV was muted, and all of Seth's
attention focused on Austin.
"Yes." Austin couldn't get a read on
Seth and he felt like Kitt with these one
word answers.
"Did you know he was gay before you
moved here or is that why you chose
here?" Seth looked like he was piecing
together a puzzle that Austin didn't even
know existed.
"No, not at all, it was just a happy
coincidence." Austin waggled his brows
again and took another drink of his
coffee.
"Convenient," Seth finally saover the
other, and perched the mug on the side of
the chair waiting for Seth's next
comment. "I didn't think rednecks were
so open-minded about these sorts of
things," Seth said after a minute's
silence.
"They aren't. You can trust me on that
one." Austin shook his head chuckling a
little.
"So he's in the closet?" Seth asked.
"He's buried."
"Huh… Then how did you figure it
out so fast?" Seth pulled his laptop back
in his lap. He looked a little relieved as
he turned away from Austin.
"His underwear." Austin gave his
truthful response and hid his smile with
another drink.
"Huh?" Seth cocked his head back to
Austin.
"It took me a couple more days, but he
wore a pair of Andrew Christian
underwear. I watched him work. They
showed through," Austin said with a
chuckle. Seth just stared at him, the
puzzle look back on his face. "You
asked…"
"First, I have Andrew Christian
underwear, and second, it's really
getting serious? Like this guys will be
around us for awhile?"
"I think we've been over this part,"
Austin said.
"Humor me." Seth's attention was
fully back on Austin, his laptop
forgotten.
"I see the manager slash agent hat
coming out. I see it in your eyes, Seth. I
told you I'm done. I'm retired."
"I didn't believe you," Seth replied
instantly. "I thought you'd get tired of
all this nothingness. Seriously, how have
you not?"
"You should've believed me. I'm not
going back into that crazy ass mess.
These last few days confirmed it for me.
So done with all that."
"So you're thinking about really
settling down here. Making this your
life." Seth waved his hand around the
living room.
"You need to believe me when I tell
you I'm not thinking about it. I've done
it, and I don't want a bunch of bullshit
from you right now. I'm happy. You're
going be happy with Cara, and I've
made you a fortune over the last ten
years. You're so tight I know it's all
saved up so you have nothing to worry
about," Austin said.
"It's not that. You're a great actor. It's
a shame to think you'll never act again."
Seth's words sounded sincere, and even
though Austin had always considered
him a good friend and not just his agent,
hearing those words eased something
inside him.
"I appreciate that, but if I do act again,
it's years down the line, and it'll be a
pick and choose kind of deal. I don't
want that life anymore. I couldn't wipe
my ass without someone taking my
picture and all those rumors… No, I'm
out, done! I can't even imagine what's
being said about me being seen out in
public," Austin said.
"It's your own damn fault. It's
because you're so good looking. Gain
weight or grow out your nose hair." Seth
focused back on his laptop. "So where
do you see this going?"
"With Kitt?" Austin asked. Not only
had he missed Kitt while he was gone,
he found he missed this farm. He rose,
taking his empty coffee mug in the sink.
He needed to get out to the barn to see
what was going on.
"Yeah." Seth stayed glued to the sofa.
"I don't really know. He won't come
out, so I guess I'll keep hiding until he's
ready. However long that might be. You
coming to the barn with me?"
"So you're really thinking long term
about this guy." Seth didn't move but did
cock his head back to watch Austin head
to the back door.
"Yes! I think I've said that over and
over." Austin headed to the back door.
He brought his Southern accent out in
full force. "You comin'?"
"Huh." Seth turned back to the laptop.
"Huh back and what the fuck ever. I'm
done with this conversation. You'll be
meetin' him soon. He has a horse about
to give birth. We're going over there
later. Get changed, I'll be takin' you on a
tour after I go check on things at the
barn."