Disclaimer: I'm not Nomura.
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Not That I Care
9
Building a Bomb
I don't know what to say about it
When all you ears have turned away,
But now's the time to look and look again
At what you see—
Is that the way it ought to stay?
--Led Zeppelin
It's pretty cool, playing the traitor. It's surprisingly easy, too. Axel wonders what that says about his character. Not that he cares. Much.
Not that Marluxia or Larxene—the real traitors—know that Axel is in on it. Something has happened to the Castle Oblivion Team; no one talks anymore. Well, technically the Organization Nobodies were never a talkative bunch, but it was different back in the Castle That Never Was. There they had meetings; there, if something interesting was happening in Agrabah, everyone in the Organization knew about it, because Xemnas made sure everyone knew about it. But Marluxia doesn't hold meetings. Information stays with a select few. For instance, Zexion didn't know until very recently that Sora was even in the building. And Zexion has also chosen not to tell the people topside that he scented the witch, Maleficient, as well as Riku—a friend of Sora's, and someone who could potentially destroy the experiment—wandering around the basements. Even Axel wouldn't know about it if he wasn't also good at playing the spy.
In any case, he likes to stay on top of things.
The Superior's absence is only part of it—the main reason why no one is talking to each other is that the team has virtually split down the middle. Of course, Axel saw that coming. There's Marluxia and Larxene—who actually do talk to each other—trading info and secrets and scheming together to take over Sora. Then there's The Scientists, the guys who haven't left the basements in who knows how long, who hate Marluxia and are scheming together to take over Riku. What they intend to do with him, Axel's not sure. It's all very complex. Axel likes complex things. Not only are they interesting, but they tend to break in the most delightful ways.
The tension between the two groups is almost palpable, like the friction that precedes a fire. It's only a matter of time before something explodes.
It's awesome. Axel loves explosions.
Which is why he's kicking back to let things unfold. Let Marluxia think Axel is on his side. Let the scientists think he's on their side. Axel is on no one's side.
Well, that's not entirely true. Whoever wins—that's whose side he's on. He'll pick when it comes to it, he supposes. For now it's fun just to watch them, busy as termites, plotting and whispering and maneuvering.
"Vexen as a termite," Axel says aloud, snapping a book closed. "There's an image."
He looks down at the book on his lap. A history on Keyblades—some shit about some Keyblade War or something. So many thoughts are going through his head, it was hard to pay attention.
He's trying. Really, he is. Even with the tangled mess that the Oblivion Project has become, what Axel really wants to focus on is his own research. His own, individual goal. He can't tell Roxas anything about Sora, but there has to be something out there that will help. Something that will save Roxas.
Axel hasn't learned much; he hasn't had time. The only reason he's reading now is because Sora is in one of his illusionary worlds, and things are relatively quiet. But the things he has learned are all rather worrying. Nobodies have been around as long as there have been Heartless, even Nobodies with the power of the Organization, but never before has a Nobody been able to wield a Keyblade. Then again, the idea of a Keyblade Master becoming a Heartless, and thus creating a Nobody, is pretty much unprecedented.
And how about Naminè? There's something interesting, too. She's the Nobody of a princess. That also just doesn't happen.
"Well," Axel says to himself, scratching his head. "Technically, Nobodies in and of themselves aren't supposed to happen, either. Just a regular bucketful of paddoxes. Or wait, that's not the word. Pada…para, para-something."
Axel tosses the book on his bed and gets to his feet. He'll get no more research done, not now with his head buzzing. A walk, that's what he needs. And maybe to burn something. Axel snaps his fingers, calling up a brief spark, then puts it out. He pulls on his coat and leaves the room, heading down the white halls.
White halls. White floors. White ceilings. Axel is remembering why exactly it is that he doesn't take walks around this godforsaken castle when Larxene appears out of nowhere. Axel just manages to stop himself from jumping.
"You know, it's not the best idea to startle the guy who controls fire," Axel points out.
Larxene gives him a placid look. "Funny, I thought you of all people simply didn't startle," she says. "And I think it would be worse to startle the girl who can control lightning. Not that it's possible."
"The Lightning Bitch Queen."
"And don't forget it. Or—what is it you say, commit it to memory?"
Axel grins, and Larxene smiles back. She smiles more often, lately. Must be because of the damage she's causing. Or maybe she's just happy.
"So what's up?"
Larxene's smile changes to her more familiar evil grin. "Little Sora's on his way here. Dear sweet Naminè has been working her magic. Looks like Sora's 'memories' are starting to take hold. Bit by bit he's forgetting Kairi and remembering Naminè."
"Well, then, I wonder how far the kid's gonna get."
"He's on his way here," Larxene adds, in the tone of someone who has found a sleek new toy to play with.
"Uh-huh. And you think it's time for another test."
A test. That's all that fight between Axel and Sora was, a test. A test for Marluxia to find out just what they were dealing with; a test for Axel to find out just how much Sora is like Roxas. Axel got his answer—and, like he had thought, the answer scared him.
Axel doesn't admit to fear, not even to himself, usually. He's a Nobody; he's not supposed to feel fear. But that's what it was when Sora shoved him back and Axel raised his arms to stop the fight and say that Sora had passed. The fight was scary.
Personality-wise, Sora couldn't be more different from Roxas. Sora's an optimist, Roxas is a pessimist. Sora is cheerful, Roxas is—let's face it—angsty. But in terms of how they fight, they're incredibly similar. Ruthless. Determined. Neither of them ever give up. If Roxas and Sora fought, Axel isn't sure who would win. And that scares him.
The others—Marluxia, Vexen, the rest of them—have no idea what they're dealing with.
"Of course," Larxene answers, voice like a razor in a sugar bowl. "You had all the fun back on the first floor. It's my turn to play."
"Your turn, huh? Fine. Just remember, we have to deliver him in one piece," Axel says. Yeah, Sora is an incredible fighter, but he's also sweet, and he's also a kid. Between Naminè's memory implants and Larxene's mind games, Sora is in a fragile state. A damaged weapon tends not to work as well.
Axel wonders, briefly, whether the experiment on Sora is affecting Roxas.
"My, my, Axel," Larxene says, putting her hands on her hips. "You're worried about Sora now?"
"Well, he is partly one of us. Half. Maybe a third."
"But Sora isn't a Nobody, Axel. Roxas is. He's who you're worried about, aren't you? Nice as it is that you, someone incapable of friendship, has found a 'friend,' you needn't worry. I won't break the toy. Toys are for playing with. You only break them when you're done with them."
Axel has a flash of a three-year-old Larxene taking hammer to a pile of dolls and toy cars and cackling like the Wicked Witch.
"You know, I think you were traumatized as a child," Axel muses. Larxene just smiles, turning away.
Axel watches her walking away down the halls, chewing the inside of his lip, deciding.
Oh, what the hell. He's always been reckless.
"Just remember," he says when she's several feet away. "Sora's the key. We need him…if we're going to take the Organization."
There it is, out in the open. Larxene comes to a halt. She turns back and looks back at him, eyes wide, genuinely startled. Axel smirks to himself. So much for Larxene never being surprised.
But then she smiles, wide and real. There's evil there, because Larxene is never without it, but she's also…happy, Axel realizes. She wants Axel on her side.
Damn…
"So you're in on it too, huh? How interesting. Well. Nice to have more than one ally. I probably don't need to tell you, but keep it under your hood until the opportune time."
With that, she smiles again—that same, painfully genuine smile—and disappears into a dark portal.
Axel stares at where she was standing for awhile. He sighs. He folds his arms. He tells himself that it doesn't matter; he doesn't care, after all.
"You should have just done the same, Larxene," he says to the empty hall.
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The fight, decidedly, does not go well.
Not that Axel is that sadistic, but there's something rather funny about watching Larxene get her ass handed to her by a kid. For someone so adamant about never losing, for someone so gung-ho, for someone who can control lightning for God's sake, simply the idea of Larxene getting pummeled is humorous.
Sora delivers the final blow—a Keyblade straight to Larxene's shoulder—and she jumps away. "Throwing the battle," she'll say later. She then, true to form, takes about five minutes to mock and insult Sora.
Oh well. They've accomplished what was intended. Sora has passed the test with flying colors—he now "remembers" Kairi's name as Naminè. There's something kind of horrifying about it, even to Axel. Only a few days and Sora has all but forgotten the person he went to the ends of the universe for. Poor Kairi. Poor Sora. Axel wonders what Naminè thinks of the whole thing.
Can't blame her, I suppose. She just wants what everyone wants.
Axel grows bored of Larxene torturing Sora and takes a dark portal to the seventh floor to wait for her. She isn't long in coming. When she steps out of the darkness her hair is disheveled, her face is red and dust is leaking from her, piling on the floor. She spots Axel, grins and smoothes out her hair.
"Hoo-boy," she says. "That was tiring. Much as I hate throwing the battle…"
Called it, Axel thinks. And because he can't resist, he says,
"Threw the battle, huh? Naaahh, I think the noun here is straight-up fucking lost the battle, hon."
The red in her face deepens. Her gloves squeak as her hands ball into fists.
"You shit," she says. "You know, there's more to battle than just winning and losing. You just don't—"
"Axel, amazingly enough, is right. Your performance was embarrassing, Larxene," someone interrupts, and out of a dark portal steps Vexen.
Larxene does a double-take. "Vexen!"
Even Axel is surprised. He hasn't even seen Vexen in about four days now.
"Beaten by a child. An insect. It's pathetic."
Larxene does a rather impressive imitation of an incensed panther. Vexen ignores her.
"What's up, Vexen? You're doing way too important things to leave the basements, aren't you?" Axel puts in. He almost wants to ask Vexen about Riku—the real Riku, the one creeping undetected through the basements. Along with the strange one with him, the one even Zexion, with his bloodhound nose, couldn't identify. Of course, mentioning it would give Axel away.
"Well, of course I'm worried about how laymen like yourselves are doing up here. I have every belief that your handling of little Sora is at best unprofessional and at worst, simply pitiful. I'm thinking an experiment would help."
"Oh, God," Larxene says, rubbing a spot on her side surreptitiously. "And inevitably it comes back to experiments with you, it's always experiments. And you say I'm pathetic."
"I'm a scientist, Larxene, it's what I do," Vexen says, glaring at her.
Larxene is fingering her kunai daggers by now. Much as Axel would love to let things blow up, explosions withheld till the last second always make for prettier fireworks. He steps between them.
"Now, now, children, play nice," he says. "Vexen, if you're so desperate to test your new toy, go ahead."
Vexen flushes red. "Toy! Toy?! Do you have no understanding of the research, the data, the long hours that go into creating something like—?"
"Oh, please," Larxene says, folding her arms and grinning wickedly. "He's a toy and nothing else."
Vexen looks ready to prove the existence of human combustion, but then he just throws up his hands.
"Why did I expect such complicated things like science and research to be understood by the likes of you two animals?"
He turns away gestures to a spot in the corner. "Come out, Riku. Let's show these idiots just what science can accomplish."
Darkness flickers. Out of it steps a boy, a little older than Sora and about a head taller. His hair is pale gray and his eyes are turquoise. He's wearing dark clothes that look like something the former leader of the Heartless would wear. In fact, he reminds Axel in a bad way of Ansem—or Xehanort, rather. And of Xemnas, who, after all, is a part of Xehanort.
But this isn't the real Riku. He's just a replica; a copy, another factor in the struggle to take over Sora's mind. Even Axel has to admit—Vexen has outdone himself this time. A fully-formed clone, whose mind is far more malleable than Sora's.
Axel wonders what the real Riku is like. Not that he particularly cares.
"Idiots, huh?" the Replica says. "They look it."
"Don't they?" Vexen says, patting the Replica's shoulder.
Larxene is all but ignoring him. She snorts and looks at Vexen. "I suppose you want him to face Sora to mess with his head."
The Riku Replica glares at her. "I want to fight Sora. Beating him is just one step closer to—"
But Vexen has moved away from him and cuts him off.
"Of course I do. If Sora sees his old friend turning against him once again, he'll be disheartened. His mind will be even easier for Naminè to control."
The Replica is looking between them, angry at being ignored. "Vexen, you said that fighting Sora will help me become real."
It's then that Axel realizes just what Vexen has brought into this world. He has created a Nobody. Axel stares at the Replica—no wonder he has the same feeling about him as both the Xehanort Heartless and Xemnas himself. This Riku Replica is less than nothing; a Nobody in the purest of senses, without even a Heartless running around, or a former true self. To willingly create such a thing…
A flame appears in Axel's hand and he makes a fist to snuff it before the others see. It's lucky that Vexen isn't looking at him; Axel is good at a poker face, but he doesn't think even he could conceal his hatred right now. Axel remembers well what it was like to become a Nobody. For a Nobody to create another Nobody is beyond abominable. Even by Axel's standards. Using people, manipulating people, killing them, that's all good and fine, but no one in the Organization—no one but Vexen—would even consider creating another Nobody.
Axel looks at the Riku Replica and for the first time in a long time, he feels the shadow of what he once knew as sympathy.
Larxene finally seems to notice the Replica and she turns to him, smiling sweetly. "Of course that's what'll happen. You play by our rules, and we can make you real. Or we could just have Naminè make you forget the minor detail that you're a fake. Better yet, we could rebuild your heart so that you're just—like—Riku."
Riku Replica seems to finally realize that neither Vexen nor Larxene exactly have his interests at heart. So to speak. He steps backward, narrowing his eyes.
"I don't want Riku's heart, he's a loser and a coward. He rejects the darkness, I embrace it! I want my own heart, a heart that can handle that darkness!"
But they're ignoring him again.
"I'm sure you don't have any objections, Vexie," Larxene says in a sugary tone.
Vexen just shrugs. "Naturally."
"What?" the Replica cries. "No! You're not going to use me!"
He dives for Larxene with a roar, but even injured she's lithe as ever. She knocks him back as if he's nothing. Which he is. Vexen pulls his arms behind his back.
"Pathetic little toy," Larxene spits. "But don't worry. In a few minutes, you'll be living a sweet little lie. You won't remember ever being fake. Now isn't that nice of us?"
"No!" the Replica howls as Larxene and Vexen proceed to drag him away, to Naminè. "No!"
Axel watches them go without a word, his face expressionless. He stands there for a long time after the Riku Replica's yells have faded. Fire tickles his palms and knuckles.
Axel doesn't care about the Replica. The Replica shouldn't have existed in the first place. It's Vexen he's thinking of. The bastard has gone too far. Is this what the Organization has come to?
Damn scientists.
Axel has always hated Vexen, but now he has a good excuse to do the thing he's been wanting to do for a long time. He's sick of this place, sick of the experiment. It would be best to just blow everything up. And Axel thinks he has an idea of how to do it.
It's complex, but Axel likes complex things. Bombs are complex, after all.
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When Axel enters the white room, Naminè has her face buried in her hands.
"Well, well," Axel says. "I guess some Nobodies can cry."
Naminè looks up at his approach, startled. She wipes her face and brushes her blonde hair out of her eyes.
"I wasn't crying," she says, calm as can be.
"Uh-huh," Axel says, leaning against the far wall. "You're having second thoughts?"
Naminè says nothing.
"Poor you. Must suck, having a bunch of assholes like me telling you what to do, making you do such mean things to poor Sora. But it also means you'll get a real life as well, right? You'll get to take the place of Kairi."
Naminè gives the slightest shake of her head. "He'll never be able to fully forget Kairi. I may be the other side of her, but I can't take her place. No matter…what I do."
Axel gives her a long look.
"I know how you feel," he says at length. "But I guess that's what it comes to in the end, innit? Nobodies can't be Somebodies."
He says it because it's the truth. He thinks he knew it all along, though he couldn't admit it until now. Axel has always been the disillusioned sort, even back when he had a real name and a real life. The Organization doesn't matter anymore. From the start their goals were unreachable. They can collect all the hearts they want, complete Kingdom Hearts, and it won't change anything. Nobodies can't be Somebodies. That's all there is to it.
Naminè hangs her head, her fingers curling in her lap.
"So we just gotta make the best of what we've got, I suppose," Axel says, standing up straight. "It may be a half-life, but we can still have some fun with it."
He crosses the room to the table and leans across it, palms down. He realizes he's shaking a little, though whether it's from fear or excitement he can't tell. He has never before committed an act of treason as great as what he's about to do. Axel is sure he'll die for it, one way or another.
The resulting explosion better be worth it.
"But you know, if you don't like it—screwing with Sora's head, I mean," Axel says, and pauses for effect, "I'm sure there's…something you could do."
Naminè stares at him and slowly, as the truth dawns on her, her eyes widen.
"You…mean…?"
"Think about it," Axel says, grinning and pulling away. He opens a dark portal. "I'm the only one here on your side, Naminè. Commit that to memory."
And he disappears before Naminè can respond. The fuse has been lit.
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Well, finally Chapter Nine is here. Sorry it took so long! Midterms, other projects, and life in general, they all tend to pile up. In any case, I hope this chapter is satisfactory. This took me longer to write than any of the others, mostly because I kept having to go back and change things so that it's in accordance with canon—so I'm not sure of its quality. But now I have a sound plan for how to carry out the rest of the CoM arc, so, woot!
Fall break is coming up, so hopefully the next chapter won't be too long in coming. Thanks for everyone who's been putting up with the long gaps between chapters. It means a lot to me that you've kept with it!
Feedback is candy for my soul.