A\N: Thanks for the reviews! I didn´t expect that many on the first chapter! :)

1) Randomly walk up to him and scream "THE FRENCH MEN! THEY´RE COMING TO TAKE OUR CROISSONTS!" and see what he does:

Private ran up to Skipper, eyes wild. "Skippah!" He shouted. The leader turned around. "What is it, soldier?"

The other grabbed him. "THE FRENCH MEN! THEY´RE COMING TO TAKE OUR CROSISONTS!"

Skipper calmly pried the flippers off his shoulders. "Relax, Private. We don´t even eat croissants. Besides, there are plenty of those in the bakery. If you´re hungry, eat fish."

With that, he walked away.

2) Go around telling everyone how he is BFFs with Julien.

"SKIPPER AND KING JULIAN ARE BFFS!" Mort´s shout interrupted Skipper´s concentration on his card house.

His team suppressed some chuckles. Skipper wasn´t amused, but horrified as he scrambled out of their HQ. "NOT TRUE!"

3) Follow him around and mimic everything – and I mean everything – he does. Claim you're his mini-me.

"Men?" The team looked up from their card game. Skipper was rubbing his beak and behind him, Maurice was doing the same. "What Skippah?" Private asked, trying not to laugh.

"That´s the thing, I don´t know what…I feel like something´s different today…but I can´t seem to put my flipper on it." He scratched his beak. Maurice scratched his chin and mimicked the way he paced around, whilst talking.

Private snickered behind his flipper. Skipper immediately looked at him. "What´s the matter soldier?" He asked crossing his flippers. "N-nothing." The Brit said. "That´s not the answer what I´m looking for!"

His leader snapped, then pointed an accusing flipper at him. "Do you know what´s wrong with m-" He stopped when he felt something at his back. Apparently, Maurice had pointed a little too far and right into his back. The penguin jumped around and glared at the lemur.

"Mammal! Explain yourself!" Skipper demanded, crossing his flippers. Maurice crossed his arms and looked at him expectantly. "What?"

"What?"
"I´m asking you!"
"I´m asking you!"
"Answer me first!"

"Answer me first!"

"I command you to tell me what you´re doing here!"

"And I´m commanding you to tell me what you´re doing here!"

"I live here."

"I live here."

"No, you don't! You be-" Skipper began, near the end of his patience, when it slowly dawned on him. "Why are you imitating me?"

Maurice shrugged. "I´m your ´mini me´!"

4) Have Julian fluff his pillow:

"Goodnight everyone!" Private chirped happily. Skipper and Kowalski returned the greeting, Rico just snored in response.

Then silence filled the HQ. Until- "RINGTAIL!" Kowalski, Rico and Private jumped up, only to see Skipper on the floor, while Julian was bouncing his pillow on his booty. "What the deuce are you DOING?" Skipper growled angrily. "Duh! I´m fluffing up your pillow! The booty makes it very soft for sleeping on." Julian said, now rubbing his royal ´pillow-fluffer´ against the said object. Skipper made a face. "I am not sleeping on that!" "Yes you are!" The Katta told him, throwing the pillow back into the bunk and Skipper after it. "I was wasting prec-ious minutes from my royal beauty sleep to be helping you!" The king huffed, then jumped out. Skipper hesitated, then slowly crept into his bed and dusted his pillow off. "Don´t blame me if I have nightmares."

5) When he finishes speeching about something – the unfairness of bullies or Julien's annoyingness, maybe – clap loudly, shout: "Bravo!" wipe away a fake tear and mumble: "Beautiful speech…"

"Remember people! Anyone who enters a three miles radius in the secured area will be immediately blasted away by either Rico or the mines. Whichever comes first. We don´t take responsibility for any broken, de-attached limbs or dead bodies." Skipper finished. The rest of the zoo stared in horror. Before anyone could ask why they have deadly zones like that in training games, loud clapping filled the air. "BRAVO!" Marlene cried, jumping to her feet. "Well spoken, Skipper!" She pretended to wipe away some tears. "Really, your speech tonight has touched me in so many ways. Thank you!" Skipper looked bewildered at Kowalski. The optionist just shrugged.

6) Hold your finger one inch away from him. Say: "I'm not touching you!" Repeat saying that until he snaps and tells you to stop not touching him. Poke him and run for your life.

Skipper was just calmly flipping through weapon magazines, when suddenly a voice floated through the air, talking in an annoying pattern. "I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you!" He looked over to his side and almost had a heart-attack. Barry was sitting next to him, pretending to poke him, ´the finger´ only a few inches away from him. "B-Barry? What are you doing?" "I´m not touching you!" Skipper nodded, not wanting to tell Barry to hit the road, afraid that the poison dart frog will get mad and poke him.

"I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you…" The penguin twitched irritated. Barry was really grinding on his nerves but he kept quiet. For now. "I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touching you! I´m not touch-" "FOR HEAVEN´S SAKE! STOP NOT TOUCHING ME!" Barry poked him then hopped off, hearing a small thump when the stiff leader fell out of his chair.

A\N: That is all for now. xD I still need to get a few lyrics to continue. Anyway, review!