I really miss this fandom, guys. I love you all! 3 I'm excited for where this story is going and I hope you all like it. Reviews with feedback are always really encouraging, by the way ;)
I stayed at Chloe and Aubrey's that night, not willing to ever leave. Chloe cried for what felt like forever but I didn't lose patience as I comforted her. If it made her feel better, I would take all the time in the world. After what Aubrey had told me I never wanted to let this sad redhead out of my sight. At one point during the night, there was a knock on the door, and Aubrey poked her head inside the room.
"Hey..." Her voice was listless and quiet. Her eyes were mainly focussed on Chloe but would occasionally flit to our interlocked hands, "...Chlo, can I talk to you for a sec?"
Chloe looked at me for a moment as if asking approval, which confused me. Aubrey was her best friend, why wouldn't she be allowed to talk to her? Did she think I would get mad or something? Not letting these thoughts get the best of me I just nodded at her with a smile, watching as she released her soft hold on my hand rather reluctantly before following her friend out of the bedroom. Aubrey closed it behind them.
I was sitting cross-legged on Chloe's bed, I had spent some time in it before. My fingers twiddled with each other as I examined the contents of the room. I had never actually looked around, being too enthralled by Chloe's sexual advances or just being too Beca-like to care about stuff so seemingly insignificant. But as my eyes moved around the walls and scanned the surface of her dresser, I so wished I had examined this stuff sooner.
Chloe had always been absolutely adorable. If I thought she was cute now, the sight of her as a little girl with her fiery red pigtails and her big wide smile almost made me have a stroke of cuteness. There was a picture of her throwing a graduation cap into the air, most likely after high school. The photos of she and Aubrey were the most abundant, and if you looked at all of them it was like you had just lived their lives alongside them. I hadn't even noticed, but I was standing up now, walking around the perimeter of the room, looking at every picture I saw. Chloe's parents looked like her, they both had red hair and amazingly blue eyes. They also had the biggest smiles on their faces. In every picture I had with my family, we weren't that close or happy looking. Not at all.
It was only when I got to her dresser and noticed a small bottle, slightly concealed behind one of the propped up picture frames. My curiosity overpowered my hesitance to snooping and I cautiously picked it up, examining the labels. My heart shattered at the mere sight of the word "anti-depressants" and I frantically placed it back in its spot as if it was toxic. Chloe, my Chloe, had to take these to maintain her peppy mood. I bit my lower lip, worry consuming me. I wanted to hug her again, just to know she was still here and that she wasn't going anywhere while she was in my arms.
Time had gotten away from me while I looked around, but those two must have been out there for a while. I tapped my foot, slightly impatient, before finally creeping to the door and opening it up a very very small crack. Eavesdropping was one of my many skills.
Aubrey and Chlo were standing as far away from her bedroom as they could get, in the kitchen. Chloe had her arms crossed and both of them looked way more serious than they usually did when they were together. I thought Aubrey was going to cheer her up or something, maybe even diss me, but the poor blonde looked like she was on the verge of tears. And Chlo was avoiding eye contact. I had never seen those two look so tense around one another. I strained to hear what they were saying, abruptly feeling as if I needed to know.
"I just don't know if this is the best idea..." Aubrey said cautiously, I had a feeling she was afraid of Chloe's reaction although I still hadn't heard the rest of this conversation.
"You should really stop worrying so much, Aub," Although her expression showed confidence her voice didn't match it, "She's already helped a lot just by being here." I smiled.
"You've spent the last week and a half crying over her, and now you just let her back in without a second thought?" Aubrey was keeping her voice a bit more quiet than Chloe was. Maybe she was afraid of being overheard. Well, that fear was justified, "It seems a bit... shaky."
Chloe pinched at the bridge of her nose as if in thought. What did she have to think about? Wasn't she confident of our relationship? I bit my lip instinctively, clenching my fists in preparation for her answer, "You let me worry about my girlfriend." Wow. That sounded cold. I hadn't expected that, and apparently neither had Aubrey.
"I-I wasn't..." She shook her head back and forth. I was too far away to tell for sure, but I had a feeling she was really close to crying, "...Chloe I want what's best for you. And I'm just not sure if Beca is..." She trailed off, her voice breaking on the last word.
"Don't even say it, Aubrey. You're making this really hard..." I could sense her discomfort but I didn't understand it. In my eyes Aubrey was just expressing her concern, though I personally believed that concern was misplaced I doubted I would be able to change her opinion on me.
Aubrey placed a hand over her mouth lightly, turning away from her friend and taking a few deep breaths. She was definitely coming apart at the seams, "I was so scared, Chloe..." I watched as my girlfriend's expression changed at those words, "...I thought..." The distraught blonde turned around and walked a bit closer, "...Chlo I thought I had lost you." I wasn't too surprised when she started crying. Honestly I had expected her to break down sooner.
Chloe, being the sincere person she was, immediately wrapped Aubrey in her arms. The two friends held onto each other like lifelines, Chloe's eyes were tightly shut but I didn't think she was crying. I abruptly felt like I was intruding for the first time since I had started observing this conversation. My eyes moved away from them for a moment, but they returned when I heard Aubrey say something I couldn't quite understand.
Chloe abruptly stepped away from her friend, a strange expression on her face that I couldn't decipher. The two weren't that far apart and they just stared at one another. With each creeping second I felt more and more intrusive and, well, creepy. Right when I was about to back up into Chloe's room and shut the door, something happened that kept me rooted to the spot.
Aubrey closed the small space between them and kissed her. She was kissing my girlfriend. And Chloe wasn't doing anything in protest, or at least it didn't seem like it. An involuntary gasp left me as my eyes began to pool with tears, unable to comprehend what I was witnessing. Aubrey and Chloe?! Since when?! Why did it seem so normal to them, why hadn't Chloe told me about it, why hadn't I assumed something was up?!
Because you trust her with your life. You didn't think she would hide anything from you for a million years. I took a few steps back instinctively, but I could still see them. I could still see them kissing. Jealousy, betrayal, distrust, and so many other awful emotions that were bad enough on their own all hit me like a freight train at the same time. I felt weak, like I was about to fall over.
But then Chloe emphatically pushed Aubrey away, the blonde's cheeks flushing with embarrassment as she tried to catch her breath. I took a step closer to the door, absolutely engrossed in this conversation, argument, thing.
"Aub..." The nickname sounded different all of the sudden, "...Aubrey..." The way she said that was so icy I felt a chill go up my spine. I had never seen Aubrey look so helpless before, and I honestly wasn't sure how to respond to that, "...what are you doing? I'm with Beca." I smiled again. It was almost like I smiled everytime she mentioned our relationship or even said my name.
Aubrey was clearly very flustered and jarred by Chloe's rejection, "That didn't stop you before."
Okay, that was enough to bring me so dangerously close to tears I had to place a hand over my mouth just to keep any sounds back as I shook where I stood, knees unstable, not trusting myself to stand. I sunk to the floor quietly, making contact with the carpet with a soft thud that wasn't heard by the two outside.
If anything Chloe seemed indifferent to what Aubrey had just said. It was only when I saw her cheeks light up with a blush and watched her cross her arms - something she always did when she wasn't sure of what to say - that I knew whatever had happened must have been some kind of mistake misinterpreted by Aubrey .Or at least that was what I kept telling myself. I wasn't sure if I could cope with any alternative.
"It's different now." Was all that the redhead said. Clearly she wanted this argument to be over with. I found myself eying her lips, suddenly feeling very protective and wanting to go out there and kiss her, but I remained where I was despite everything that told me to either stop eavesdropping or to go out there and confront them.
"Really? How?" Aubrey sounded anything but convinced.
"I..." Chloe fiddled with one of her curls, not looking at her best friend in any way, "...I love her." Again, a wide grin spread across my face despite all of the emotional turmoil my heart was enduring at that moment. Hearing her say that was just the most uplifting thing I had ever experienced.
Aubrey seemed unfazed, "But you've said you loved me a million times!"
"Yeah, in a friend way." Okay, I admit, Chloe could have said that in a nicer way. The conversation was already unpleasant enough, but her tone was just acidic. I watched Aubrey's reaction very closely.
The blonde stood, swaying a bit. I wondered if she was going to faint, or vomit maybe, but when she started to blink quickly again I knew she was just going to start crying. Now the two had locked eyes. Again, I felt very intrusive, but I also felt that I had already heard too much and if I listened in a little longer no harm would be done.
"Fine. Go back to her, then." Aubrey turned away and walked quickly to her room, Chloe following her at a distance, looking distraught and regretful at the way she had handled that.
"Aubrey wait-"
"-why?" They had left my sight, and if I tried to look at them they might see me. So I could only listen. The signature clacking of Aubrey's heels made me aware that she was still proceeding to either her bedroom door, or the front door. I wasn't sure if I prefered the former or the latter.
"I don't want to leave this on such a bad note-"
"Well too fucking late." The sound of a door slamming was so loud it made me jump out of my skin. Chloe would be returning in a few seconds. I quickly closed the door, careful that it didn't make much noise, and jumped back into bed.
I buried myself beneath the covers, my back turned to the door, waiting patiently for Chloe to walk in. It took a while. For a few minutes I wondered if she had gone after Aubrey or something, or if their argument continued in another area I couldn't eavesdrop, but the sound of the door opening shattered those possibilities.
Light, dainty footsteps made their way the bed and I felt her lay down on the other side, crawling beneath the covers. When I felt her arms snake around my waist and pull me flush against her, I smiled at the feeling of her chest against my back, feeling safe and reassured that no matter what had happened before, our relationship was intact. I could talk about the Aubrey thing another time. But right then, I just let myself pretend to be oblivious. As Chloe gently kissed my cheek, I knew that there was no way I was ever going to break up with this girl.
So I just had to pray she didn't break up with me.