Enjoy! ^_^
Chapter 9
Later, in the car ride back...
"WHY WOULD YOU PUT HIS WHOLE BATHROOM UP YOUR DICK?!" Seth screamed, irate.
"I didn't know I had DNA up my dick!" Reigns cried back.
"You LIE! You KNOW there's DNA up your dick!" he snapped back.
"I didn't!"
"You just like shoving shit up your dick! YOU FUCKING PERVERT!" Rollins cried.
Dean defeatedly tossed his arms in the air. "We're lawyering up, man! That's fucking it."
Seth was still extremely pissed off. "I don't have money for a lawyer, okay? I bought a very expensive ring for my fiancee, that I can't afford! And then I gave the rest of my motherfucking money to Motherfucker Jones!"
"That's who we should talk to." Roman said quickly.
"Sure, why not? He's covered us this far, right? Five grand?" Dean asked flatly.
"No, no, no! Five thousand forty with the briefcase!" Seth chimed in.
"WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THAT CASE?!" Dean and Roman snapped in unison, while Rollins coiled back into the seat.
...
Moments later, they reached the bar that MF Jones was hanging out in once more. With the loud rap music blasting in the background, they greeted him.
"Hey, Motherfucker!" Roman exclaimed as they took their seats next to him.
"Hey!" he greeted coolly. "Look who's back, look who's back. What happened to that 'Strangers On A Train' shit?"
"Oh, it worked out, man-it worked out." they muttered at once.
"One of our intended victims killed one of the other intended victims." Dean revealed.
"Mmhmm." Roman nodded.
MF looked at them, surprised. "Shut up!"
Ambrose agreed, "Yeah. It's gone fucking bad."
"You guys are some fuckin' evil geniuses."
Reigns chuckled. "No. No."
Seth chuckled along. "Well, thank you. Yeah, but actually we had nothing to do with it. See, you don't know how it happened, right? The cops, they bring US in as suspects, and now the DA's on our asses because Roman shoved a toothbrush up his dick."
"Huh?" MF questioned while Reigns cautiously glanced around.
"That's-that's not the point." he replied.
"I'm trying to give him the whole story!" Rollins exclaimed.
"I gotcha, first things first, you gotta handle your business." MF continued.
"Mmhmm."
He looked between them all. "...Give me five thousand dollars."
"NO!-No more money." they cried.
"Two thousand."
"Nope-absolutely not-no way, Motherfucker-just no."
"I-alright. Pay for my drinks."
"Pay for...all right, fine-I'll do that." they agreed.
"We're good negotiators." Seth announced.
"Look, the guy that killed the other guy you were planning on killing, are the cops after him?" he asked.
"No-They don't suspect him."
"Then this is what you need to do. Get him to confess to the murder while you're wearing a wire." he announced.
Roman thought it over and nodded. "A wire? We can do that. That's easy. Yeah."
"Is that how they got you? When you murdered somebody?" asked Dean.
Jones gave them a look whilst taking a sip of his drink through his straw.
"I never murdered nobody." he muttered.
"Sorry?"
"I never murdered anybody."
"Wait! No! You said you did a dime for some pretty nasty shit?" Roman reminded him.
"There was some nasty shit. But does that mean I murdered somebody? Where did you hear murder?"
"Well, you certainly implied it!" he cried.
"If you didn't murder someone, what did you do?" Seth wondered.
MF began, "Alright. Listen, come here."
They moved their heads closer to him.
"You guys ever see the movie 'Snow Falling on Cedars'?"
Roman shook his head. "No."
Dean looked quizzingly towards him. "I've never seen it."
Seth grinned. "I love that movie."
Motherfucker continued, "What happened was that I took a video camera into the movie and I bootlegged it. They was waitin' for me right outside the exit."
A pause.
"You did ten years for video piracy?" Ambrose asked, confused.
"They take that shit so serious."
"We've been taking murder advice from some guy, whose biggest crime is taping an Ethan Hawke movie!" Reigns cried.
He turned to him. "So, you DO know the movie."
He nodded quickly. "I know who's in it. I know who's in it. Yeah."
"That's not the point!" Seth exclaimed. "You tricked us, Motherfu...you know what, wait a second. Something doesn't stack up quite right with this. So you just call yourself a video pirate, right? Pirating the high seas of vidiocy? Why do you carry a gun on you, mister video pirate?"
"A gun?" he paused, slipping out an iPhone. "It's my cell phone."
"An iPhone. I'm gonna be in the car." Dean announced, turning around to leave.
"Shit." Roman muttered.
"Well, you grabbed at it like a gun and confused people. Goddamn it, I feel like a moron." Rollins pouted.
"Come on, let's go." he replied.
"You ARE a moron." MF called.
They turned back to him.
"Look, you don't go into a bar and hand a guy $5,000 just cause he's black."
"No, it's never a black/white thing, I-" Seth began, but it was no use.
"Come on, let's go. Let's go." Reigns patted him on the back as he led them away. "Seth."
"Y'all mothafuckers crazy." he chuckled.
Later that same evening...
The boys had pulled up to Laurinaitis's house once again, ready for the next phase of their plan.
"Wow, it's pretty quiet up here." Roman observed, driving.
"All right, all right, so I got the tape ready to roll, I got some fresh batteries in here," Seth began, holding up the tape recorder.
"All right."
"So this is a pretty big investment on my part, and I feel that I should be the one who does the tape recording."
"No way. No. I'll do it." Roman replied, grabbing it.
"You'll do it?"
"Yeah."
"Well, you'll have to duct tape that thing to your chest, bud."
He glanced back at him. "I can't tape this to my chest, it'll leave tape marks."
"Well then put it in your pants! Don't tape it to your chest." Dean replied, before the three stepped out.
"So what do we do? Wait for him to come home, and like, grab an office chair or something? One of us gets in the chair, spins around, like dramatically confronts him?" Rollins asked.
"Great. I'm in the chair." Dean announced.
"Dean's in the chair."
"Why does Dean get to be in the chair?" Roman asked.
"Cause he's MY boss."
"Wait, Rome's making a great point. Why don't we get three chairs and spin around at the same time?" Rollins continued.
"What the fuck's that?" Ambrose demanded.
"That's not intimidating, that's a musical number." Reigns replied.
Soon enough, Dean quietly opened the front door, while Roman whispered, "Watch out for the cat."
Once the light turned on though, they nearly jumped once party music came on and a ton of people popped from out of nowhere yelling, "SURPRISE!"
Candice, Johnny's wife stood first. "Oh, it's a false alarm. Ok, mingle, mingle, mingle." she told everyone else, before approaching the three. "Hi. Who are you? Come on in, come on in."
"Yeah! Yeah." Dean quickly shut the door.
"Ok, now wait, you're the young man who helped Johnny out on the street the other night, right?" she asked Seth.
"That's him." Dean nodded.
"Yeah! That's...that's who I am. How is he?" he asked.
"He is great, thanks to you. Thank you!" she smiled while he nodded. "...Did I invite you here?"
"Uh, you didn't, you didn't, see..."
"I uh, work for your husband. I'm Dean, these are my plus twos." Ambrose replied with a light chuckle.
Before she could reply, a man called, "He's in the garage!"
"Oh! We should hide, we should hide. Everybody in!" she exclaimed, leading them into the den.
"Somebody get the lights!" a woman called.
"Get down, get down..."
As everyone hid, Roman hid behind Candice and whispered, "Uh hi, I'm Roman. I didn't get to introduce myself earlier at the door."
She quickly turned around and shook his hand. "Hi, I'm Candice."
"Hi, Candice, nice knowing you." he grinned. "Y'know, Dean didn't tell me that his boss was married to a model."
"Heh, yeah. NOT a model."
"When did you quit?" he asked, while she grew speechless this time and giggled.
Moments later, Laurinaitis stepped in the room while the lights came on and everyone cried, "SURPRISE!"
Instead of being surprised though, Johnny seemed irate, evident by his angry stamping around. "Agh! GOD, I hate that!" he cried.
The partygoers' smiles faded, while Candice approached him. "Hey, what's got you, honey? So were you surprised?"
"Uh...yeah."
"See, everybody's here!"
"Yeah, huh huh...let me put my stuff down." he muttered, walking away. "She knows I HATE that shit!"
"Oh, I think we got him. We got him good." she smiled.
Seeing Laurinaitis storm into his personal office, the boys huddled together again.
"All right, he's alone now." Ambrose began.
"You guys ready?" Seth asked.
Roman paid no mind though, as the only thing he was currently lusting over was Candice. "Yeah. Very ready." he said blankly.
The others didn't notice this. "Ok, let's do it." Dean announced, while he and Seth headed into Johnny's room. Reigns, in the meantime, headed the other way.
"Let's do it." he echoed, ready to have himself some fun.
Ambrose and Rollins quietly stepped into Laurinaitis's office. "Laurinaitis?" Dean called first.
Annoyed, he dropped his papers and eyed them down. "Oh. I can't believe my wife invited you. What the HELL are you doing here?" he turned to Seth. "Came to stab me a few more times?"
"We know what you did." Dean continued.
"What does that mean?"
"We were there. We saw you kill him."
He smirked. "Really? So what is this? A shakedown? You think you can blackmail me because you saw me kill my wife's lover?"
Dean winced, waiting for the big reveal to come. So close!
"Say his name!" Seth cried loudly, startling them both.
"What?" Laurinaitis questioned.
"That man you killed, you say his name!"
"Bischoff! Trust me, Bischoff's name means nothing anymore." he revealed.
Dean grinned evilly. "There it is! Thank you. Let's do it guys?"
"Yeah, that's right." Johnny nodded.
Dean looked around for Roman, but he wasn't in the room.
"Where the fuck is Reigns?" he muttered.
"I killed Bischoff!" he exclaimed again.
"Wait, wait, hold that thought. I'm missing one guy, my friend Roman." Ambrose cried, getting more and more agitated.
Laurinaitis ignored him and continued, "I walked right up to his door, I put a gun in his chest and I shot him! And then you know what? You know what I did after that? I shot him again! Now let me tell you something. I liked it. So if you think that I'm some sort of pussy, who wouldn't do exactly the same thing to a couple of lame-assed blackmailers? Think again."
Dean quickly looked back towards the living room and said, "You know, who really thinks you're a pussy is my friend Roman. Let me go grab him and you can tell him exactly what you just -"
"You know, you are pathetic, Ambrose. You walk into my house, on my goddamn birthday and pull this shit? Well, let me tell you something. You're dead. You," he turned to Seth. "And YOU, and..."
"Roman." Dean said quietly.
"Roman. Dead men." he finished with that evil gleam of his.
"Hey, I didn't know it was your birthday, so..." Seth stopped in mid sentence once they observed Johnny reaching into a drawer. "Wait. Whatcha got there? What is that?"
"What are you doing?" Ambrose asked.
"Just gettin' my gun, it'll only take a second."
The two paled.
"Ok, we better get in the car, then." he said quickly, rushing out of the room alongside Rollins.
"Let's amscray." he agreed. Looking thoroughly freaked out, Dean and Seth pushed their way through the partygoers.
"We had him! We had the whole goddamn thing. What the fuck happened to Roman?" Dean demanded, pissed.
Just then, Roman emerged from a hallway, buckling his belt and looking strangely red in the face.
"Hey, YOU!" Seth cried.
"Oh, hey." he smiled.
"And where the fuck were you?!" Dean demanded.
"Oh uh, I was in there, had to take a piss." he replied, while Candice sneakily slid out of the same room in the background.
"He confessed everything! Now he's grabbing a gun, you fucking idiot!" Seth snapped.
"Damn it, Rome, you didn't-?" Ambrose asked while Candice approached him.
"Oh, uh, she was giving me a tour of the mound-uh, house." he said quickly.
Seth slapped him across the face.
"OW!"
Dean slapped him across the face, too.
"OW! What are you-"
"NOW! Let's get in the car, right now!" the two exclaimed, dragging the Samoan outside with them. All while Laurinaitis refused to take his eyes off of the fleeing trio. He knew just what he had to do next. With a grim look, he calmly headed to the garage.