Standard disclaimers applied. See Chapter 1 for further details.

Author's Note: Since I made you guys wait so long for the last chapter, I have decided to post this one sooner than expected. Enjoy it! This one is my longest chapter yet.

CHAPTER 7: Complexities of Love

She never truly allowed herself the luxury to cry after the loss of Ray. It wasn't a loss in the literal sense but figuratively, some part of Ray the roomie, died that day when he had his legs amputated. Here at Arlington National Cemetery, in front of a bunch of strangers, she found herself bawling. Grandma Saracen was a kindred spirit as the older woman wrapped her arms around Neela. "It's love, honey. It's ok to cry over love," she reiterated.

"When did love ever get so complicated?" Neela sobbed out.

"Because, it's love."

Her logic was almost childlike and just as quickly, her attention was diverted to her grandson. "Matt? When are we going home?"

"Soon Grandma. Uh, Landry's gonna bring you to the car, ok? I'll be there in a sec."

Neela's confusion was evident on her face and Matt felt that an explanation was needed. "It's Alzheimer's ... sometimes, she's just ... I'm sorry if ..."

"No, don't worry. I felt bad just crying all over her like that."

"Uh, no worries. No harm done," Matt replied and almost shyly, he added, "I don't know if this helps. We say this all the time in football... clear hearts, full mind, can't lose. That is - if you..."

"Matt!" Landry was calling to his best friend, "C'mon Saracen, your Grandma..."

"Sorry ... I gotta go. Good luck," said the young teen and Neela was left wondering if the whole encounter actually happened.

oOoOo

"So, who authorized this?"

"Does it really matter? We're here now."

"Just wondering if I should plead temporary insanity, when they ask me."

Ray laughed and shot back, "You could wait until Lyla comes and get authorization from her. Besides, I don't think they would believe you, considering this is practically your idea."

Jason only rolled his eyes.

After what seemed like weeks of rehab, he was ready to break out of the hospital. By now, his head was no longer restricted by the stiff neck collar, granting him greater freedom with the range of motion in his neck. He was working on pushing himself around in the wheelchair but flexibility in his upper limbs was still very weak. He could hardly grip the handle bars on his wheelchair without muscle spasms with the exertion. Lyla was still hovering; his parents were still worried and he was still stuck within the four walls of this institution.

He had ranted to his cousin that he just wanted to feel fresh air for once without ten pairs of eyes overlooking his shoulder.

"Where do you want to go?" Ray had asked.

"Well obviously, we can't exactly highjack a car and roadtrip outta here. Although that's a bad idea, I'll settle for going up to the roof or something." Jason would never imagine that Ray would take his words seriously.

"The roof of the hospital ... I'll see what I can do, QB."

That was a couple of days ago. Ray was still working on balancing on his new limbs, as he went for more fittings to get custom-made parts and joints. Somehow in between rehab, he had found an elevator that went all the way to go up to the roof of the hospital.

"You know, this is actually nostalgic," Ray commented.

Jason glanced over to his cousin who brought along his guitar and was fingering a nameless chord. "What is?"

Ray's daft fingers continued to manipulate the guitar strings and Jason thought that Ray was going to ignore him. Shivering slightly from a sudden draft, the former Dillon QB was startled when Ray found his voice, "This - playing my guitar on the rooftop of a hospital."

"You've done this before?"

"Yeah, I didn't have a solid place yet, so I live at the hospital for a bit. One of the docs caught me drinking booze and playing the guitar up on the County rooftops."

Jason didn't know whether Ray was joking or not and said so, "You know you're a horrible influence on me, Doc."

"Never said I was going to be the ideal role model, QB."

"Do you miss it?"

"What?"

"You know, being a doctor. County. Your friends ... take your pick."

Again, Ray chose to ignore the teen. Jason tried another tact, "I wish I brought mine," he said.

"What?"

"My guitar. We could start our own band and rock this joint."

"I was in a band, played in a couple gigs and recorded some stuff too."

"Wow, you're a regular jack of all trades. A doctor and a rocker."

Ray laughed at that, "Yeah, the chicks dig it. Had a groupie and everything."

"You know what I don't get about you, Ray? I've been here for almost six weeks and it totally pisses me off that my best friend hasn't been to see me at all. Now mind you, I'm suffocating with all this extra attention from Lyla but at least, I have people coming to see me. But you ... I know you have friends, doctors, nurses, people you work with but you don't want anybody to come. I can bet you a new pair of legs that you haven't told them about what happen."

Jason knew that he had essentially hit the nail on the head, as Ray plucked one of the strings a little bit too hard, "Sh-t."

Ray finally looked up and faced his cousin, "I don't need pity and I certainly don't want anybody coming here telling me that everything is going to fine when I wake up tomorrow."

"Did you tell her?"

"Why does it matter?"

"So you did! Interesting," Jason surmised.

"You don't know anything."

"You're right, I don't. My bad."

Ray returned to his guitar and Jason thought that he went too far and decided that he should at least extend a truce. "Ray..."

"I told her not to tell anybody. I was angry. I was hurt. Maybe, I want her to fight a little harder. I don't know, but I guess it doesn't really matter right now."

"Of course it does, if you still love her."

"It's slightly more complicated than that."

"Love always is."

This time, the two cousins descended into a comfortable silence that was only complemented by Ray playing the guitar.

"So, you really want to know who authorized all of this?"

"Yeah."

"Dr. Streetnett."

Jason stole a look at his cousin and said, "Just so you know, I will be pleading temporary insanity, when they ask me."

End of Chapter 7