Chapter 16: Bromance Rising

This isn't the first time it's taken me forever to update. I tried to make it as long and action-y as possible. I hope you enjoy.

The goat boys hand smelled like rock and spices. A burning sensation rose to Zims face, he could already feel his PAK injecting adrenaline into his veins, coursing through his mighty Irken blood. The tyrants in his head started whispering violent orders. His heart beat faster as Pepito grabbed his shoulders pulling him closer towards his chest. Irked and piqued, he pushed the filthy goat boy away only to find both arms enveloping him from behind. Zim thrust himself backwards into the cabinet making a muted bang as the goat boy's back made contact with metal.

Zim opened his mouth to give a fearsome threat but the pathetic leech whispered a harsh, "Shush."

How dare he tell the great Zim to shush! I am shushed you pathetic troll baby.

Oh yeah cause you won't give us away at ALL, His voice sneered back in Zims head. Fury flowed fiercely into his entire being. He hated this boy, he hated this stupid place and he hated those stupid earthinoid scientists outside the cabinet keeping him from simply killing this nuisance holding him back. Zim reached the end of his metaphorical string. That's it!He licked the inside of the goat boys' filthy hand. He recoiled as the taste of peppers, hand sanitizer, and a smoky burnt taste hit his segmented tongue. The taste didn't matter to Zim though, his results had been more profitable than he expected. The Pepito drew back his hand and released his bear hug. Pepito took one step, two steps back and fell down against the cabinet door, swinging open to reveal the male scientist Tempest and the female guard peering inquisitively over their shoulder. For a moment three of them stood in silence while the goat boy rolled over on the ground cursing unaware of the two extra members.

"Oooh, ew. You vile wretched-OMG it's burning! Oh sweet Satan why is it? Ew. EEEWW!" Pepito pulled himself into a sitting position, quickly rubbing his slobbery hand along the dirty floor viciously. His face blanched as he lifted his pale hand up off the floor. His ash white palm was caked in a grey debris. "Oh, that's just perfect."

Zim smirked triumphantly as the goat boy hauled himself to his feet. He pointed his finger at Zim, his accent adding malevolence to his voice, "You know, I don't have to wait to kill you. If I wanted to, I could…"

Pepito looked out of the corner of his eye and froze. Zim fully turned his head. Both scientists were staring at them with fear and anger. There was a tense silence in the air, as though, at any moment, a bomb would go off. Why were they looking at Zim like…? His contacts. His wig. He took them off at the base. Zim looked over at Pepito, still frozen and pointing and looking at him the same look.

Crap.

The black and yellow haired Tempest was the first to move, reaching for something on his belt. The female-Hannah?-followed suit and charged them, her lab coat flowing behind her like a cape. Big mistake. The adrenaline fully took effect and Zims brilliantIrken mind went onto auto pilot. Zim used his SPYDR legs to propel him forward, delivering a perfect kick to her chest. The female coughed and fell backwards. Zim raised his SPYDR leg to impale the pathetic pig smelly only to dodge a brilliant light whizzing past his head. He turned in time to see another ball of flame fly past and splatter against the wall. Tempest dove to the ground and Zim was falling sideways. The woman must have kicked out one of his legs. Hannah kicked out at him again and scuttled backwards getting to her feet. Zim cursed himself. You were never supposed to take your eyes off your opponent. Earthlings were smelly and irritating. She was considerably taller but he knew he was stronger. Hannah pathetically attempted to kick him again but he easily side stepped. He grabbed the leg and pulled sideways. The foolish girl fell like a lone domino. Zim took advantage of the opportunity and lunged at her. He grabbed ahold of Hannah's head and began fiercely attacking her with his claws. He raked across her neck and tore those stupid goggles from her eyes. The girl began screeching and struggled to get to her feet. For a guard, she wasn't very good at fighting at all. He tried desperately to claw out her eyes but she began running, bumping into random things, and scratching at him with those blue gloves. He held on to Hannah's brown locks for dear life and kept grabbing, tearing, scraping, and even biting. He finally managed to get a hold of her neck and began wrapping his arm around it. The girl's screams became gasps and splutters. Still, she kept struggling.

"I'll give you points", Zim stated to the girl. She began to truly fight back now like all wounded animals did, scratching and attacking randomly. She leaned back and repeatedly slammed into the metal cabinet. "For persistence. Just-ow-GIVE-OW-UP!" Zim thought he heard her cough some sort of retort but he simply tightened his hold around her throat, cutting her off. Zims world was suddenly obscured by white smoke. His respiratory system flip flopped in his chest and PAK. He hacked out a dry cough. Zim-in a moment of very, very, very rare weakness-loosened his grip on her slightly. The female must have somehow sensed this and managed to pry off Zims arm. She coughed and stumbled out of his sight. Zim panicked and sent a SPYDR leg blindly out into the dissipating fog. He felt the vibration of metal on skin and charged forward to run smack into something hard. Zim fell backward landing hard on his elbows. He rubbed his head groaning. He squinted through his ruby eyes and saw that Mohawk wearing brat scowling back at him.

"You idiot!" The brat lashed out angrily, his young voice squeaking with rage. Both males rose immediately to their feet. Zim indignantly retorted, "You ran into me worm baby. If anyone's the idiot here, it's you!"

"Tempest. Tempest! Open the door." Zim glanced over to the left. Hannah was jiggling on the doorknob furiously. She darted a quick look behind her and turned, pressing her back against the blue door. Her hazel eyes danced between the two of them then at the floor then back at them. There was a sharp click from beyond the door. The woman made a strange choking noise from the depths of her throat. Zim realized with a start that Tempest wasn't in the room anymore. Tempest had left her behind? Zim recalled the scene in the hallway with confused disgust. Humans. Fickle. He looked at the earthinoid before him deciding that she wasn't a guard but, after looking at her lab coat, teal gloves and name tag, a scientist. Definitely an important cog in this place. Someone worth interrogating. Didn't he also want... Zim stole a quick glance at Pepito cautiously eyeing him back. An unspoken proposition. Pepito nodded slowly. A mutual agreement. Zim crossed his arms and opened his mouth only to be beaten by Pepito.

"Aw, what's wrong? Your little Romeo run off without you?" Pepito crooned. "Un rostro tan hermoso. Me encantaria que arruinarlo. So easy, so easy to break. We can do this two ways. Easy or hard. You're a smart lady. I can see this so, why don't you relieve your burden? Tell us what you know." He took a few confident steps forward, hands behind his back. Outrage swelled from the geyser of pride within him. Zim wanted to be the one leading!

Zim does not follow the lead of some 8 year old troll baby.

Zim took a few steps forward till he was side by side with the insolent fool. Pepito shot him a questioning look. Zim tried another approach. Bluffing. "We know what you're doing here is illegal and it has something to do with this stupid Skool. And why students keep vanishing!"

"Yes," Pepito piped in, "so confess woman." Pepito stretched his hand out in front of him. There was the brief smell of gas then at the center of Pepitos palm, a single purple flame as small an delicate as a candle sprung forth. The flame swiftly flowed outward until his entire right hand was engulfed. Unfazed by the fire, Pepito shrugged, "And maybe you might leave here with your eyebrows attached." Not to be outdone by an 8 year old, Zim took a step forward shaking his fist, "Or with a face to have those eyebrows on!"

Pepito gave an exasperated sigh for some reason and took a step forward. Hannah took a few steps to the right. She stuttered, "I-I-I won't tell you...anything!"

"He doesn't love you." Pepito snapped. The woman froze, hurt. Her features twisted and she flung herself down at the ground. She scooped up a large red tank discarded on the floor and pointed the nozzle out before Zim or Pepito could move. Zim registered the words fire extinguisher before she pulled down the nozzle. White foam and smoke spewed forth. Pepito tried throwing his fire ball hand thingy but it was quickly extinguished. Pepito shielded his eyes, sputtering. Hannah rose the fire extinguisher back to swing it. Zim threw a mechanical leg out and watched it impale the young woman to the stone wall. Crimson blossomed from her rib cage. Pepito took a few steps back. The fire extinguisher fell to floor with a clang. The woman feebly clawed at the metal skewering her to the wall. Zim watched, frowning, as his latest opponents light died. He retracted the leg, watching the shell crumble to the floor in a limp pile. Zim shrugged nonchalantly. Eh. Zim looked up from the corpse to the brat. His black hair was even more messy than usual. There were tears in his black pants. Zim stared at him for a while before shouting, "HEY!"

"GAH! GOD don't do that!" Pepito jumped and for the first time Zim saw fear flicker in his yellow pupils. His pale head was flushed from all that action, his shirt and jeans had numerous scraps and dust over them. He was panting quite heavily. Zim looked back from the empty shell to Pepito, his green face lighting up with understanding. Zim asked, "First kill, huh?"

The Antichrist shook his head slowly, turning back to the corpse, his face stoic. Zim brushed dirt off of his long pink tunic, disappointed albeit surprised that the eight year old had killed before. "No?," he asked, "You've killed before?" Zim looked over to the left at the smoldering desk. The back wall was blasted with burn marks and the computer was on fire. Zim felt the cold sting bitter disappointment. So there was no chance of reading whatever those two fools were looking at earlier. Flarsh mcnuggles. Still, that burn mark was pretty sweet. Deep grey, reeking of sulfur and smoke, it's ferocious pattern giving the white wall a giant eye. Just staring at it made Zims blood tingle. Zim whistled in appreciation, "Wow.

How do you do that?"

Pepito, still dazed and exhausted from the lack of energy available, looked up from the pool of blood leaking out of Hannahs chest. His ruby eyes-a perfect mimic of ZIMs own, flashed with annoyance, "Do… what?"

Zim pointed to the giant burn mark on the wall, exuberated, "THAT! How did you do the fire thing?" Pepito rubbed the back of his neck, the surprise evaporating. He raised his hands in a strange earth gesture, exposing his palms, "Even I do not fully understand my own abilities. I just… do it. Father says it is all in my head but eh." Pepito grabbed the coat collar of the corpse and sat down on it's back. He reached into his pants pocket, pulled out a bag of chips, and opened them with a creak. He popped a few in his mouth, the chips making a loud crunching noises. Pepito looked around the room for a while before resting on Zim. He stared at Zim for a while, the only sound in the room the crunching of chips, before holding the bag out to him. He mumbled out, "Vant crumb?"

"Eh?" Zim asked, perplexed. Pepito swallowed and repeated, "Want some. Do you want some chips?" He shook the bag, the sound of chips echoing in Zims brain like a sirens call. Zims stomach growled. How long have I been down here? he wondered. Zim suspiciously eyed the outstretched bag. Why would his enemy offer him food? His stomach rumbled again. Uhhh so huuuuuunnnnngggggrrrrrryyyyy. Zim strolled over and nonchalantly plopped beside Pepito on the dead womans back, grabbing for a couple of chips. He bit into one, surprised that the taste didn't make him want to vomit profusely, then tossed the rest into his mouth greedily. Pepito reached in and admired it,"Nice job by the way with that lady."

"Zim thought so too." said Zim, reaching into the bag for a few more chips. "What're these things called again?" Pepito tapped his feet in the blood a little bit before answering, "Doritos."

"They're not… horrible." Zim admitted, pulling out another in triumph. "You weren't completely useless yourself with the flaming hands." Pepito looked at Zim in surprise. "Did you just compliment me?"

"Well I didn't insult you, I suppose." Zim reached into the bag and found only flavor dust. He licked the flavoring off his black gloves ravenously.

"You got anything else?" Pepito shook his head, "Only if you like Poop bars."

"Ehmm, yeah sawdust." Zim looked at the corners of the room, "There aren't any security cameras. And the ceilings all stone. I say we stuff the body in the closet."

"We?"

"Yes 'We?' " Zim mimicked crudely. Who did this brat think he was that he could just arrogantly shrug off body ditching? He rose up and pointed to the door."Though it should be just you since you let the guy get away!" Pepito stood up letting the bag of Doritos fall to the floor. "Me? HA! You are the one knocking me over! I could have caught that bastard if you hadn't tripped me with your metal leg thing!"

"Don't get high and mighty with me, branch boy! Nail head! Goat boy! If it wasn't for ZIM you would be bleeding out your brain meat on the floor!" Zim pointed to the abandoned fire extinguisher in the corner of the room. Pepito scowled, his pride obviously keeping him from bowing down and thanking the almighty Zim for saving his life. "Fine. Let us make a compromise then. Where is your robot? He can do it."

"What?" Zim asked confused. Robot. Oh, robot. He must mean Gir. Zim wrinkled his brow confused, "EH?" Pepito face palmed, groaning like his own ambiguousness was Zims fault. Pepito took a deep breath and said very loudly, "WHERE. IS. YOUR. WALKING. TIN. CAN?"

Zim scoffed, "Duh… he's…" Zim froze. He slowly reached up and felt the top of his head for his slave. He felt only his own scalp. Zim whipped around. His incredible eyes didn't see it anywhere. "GIR! OH THAT HORRIBLE ROBOT-"

"You mean, you don't know where your own slave is?!" Pepito asked incredulously. Zim turned on him, poking him in the chest, "You try keeping a slave with the IQ of a toaster on track? No! Didn't think so!" Zims mind raced with horrible possibilities. Gir being captured and his secret getting out. Gir running into a lab and setting it on fire with his secret getting out. Oh Kri he was screwed! Zim rushed to the door, grabbed the golden door handle and found it wouldn't turn. He took a step back and fired his SPYDR lasers tearing the door off its hinges. He kicked through the remaining door fragments staring at the tunnel. "Er left? Right? Gah, why can't put signs in this place?"

"What about the body?" Pepito walked out into the hallway. Zim SO did not have time for this. He snapped at the brat, "Hide it yourself! Zim has more important things to do as of now." Zim decided right looked best and headed down the green lit corridor. He must have been a few yards down when he heard footsteps behind him. Zim looked over his shoulder and saw Pepito behind him and gaining at an alarming rate. "What are you doing?" He shouted over his shoulder. Pepito caught up to Zim, sprinting with the alien side by side, his pale face a ghastly green from the crystal lights, his eyes a fierce red. He said, "What does it look like I'm doing you fool? I'm coming with you!"

"What? No." Zim stopped at an intersection. Pepito skidded to a stop, his boots lifting a cloud of dust. He looked at Zim in amusement, "You really think you can find your way out on your own again? Ha! Don't make me laugh! I have been investigating this longer, and have nearly all the tunnels memorized-including the exits. You need me."

"You know what we really need?" Zim asked, his frustration barely contained. "That scientist man, Tempest dead. He saw us-both of us! He left that girl behind to distract us so he could raise the alarm. If he reaches anyone and tells him about us, we'll lose the only thing we have going for us right now. Anonymity."

"You just said 'we' again." Pepito said. Zim scowled, shaking his head. This brat seriously had a one track mind. "Yeah, so what?"

"Does that mean you've accepted my offer of alliance?" Pepito asked casually. Zim froze and looked-really looked at the being standing before him. Biologically the age of an eight year old earthinoid but mentally this creature was way more advanced than a normal child. Already he has killed and taken his first life and Zim assumed, with the way he comfortable sat on that dead woman, many more. Maybe not as many as Zim had but still many. His pyro hands, disappearing abilities, and unnerving mind reading powers would make him a dangerous opponent. And he already knew Zims secret and was quite comfortable with it. Kri, Zim swore. He glared at Pepito, "Fine. On one condition. You keep out of my head."

"...Fine." Pepito snapped his fingers and Zim felt a burning sensation crawl along the inside of his head. He opened his mouth to scream but before he could take a breath it was already over. His PAK produced his mirror and in the dim green light he say the fading mark of a goat skull dissipating into his green skin. He rubbed his forehead, the mirror retracting into it's containment unit. He opened his mouth to lash out at the deplorable little jerk but Pepito held up his hand for silence, "Yeah. It hurt. But now I can't read your mind or sense you or whatever so shut up and…" Pepito faltered. He looked down the hall to his right. He cocked his head, an inhuman growl rumbled in his throat. He looked back at Zim, his eyes glowing balls of rage. He beckoned behind him. "Go, Invasor Zim. Use your antennae to find your way out. I think our friend Tempest is up to something. I can feel the toxic sludge falling off of him."

"You sure?" Zim raised an eye in surprise. "Cause it's probabllly a trap." Pepito looked over his shoulder at Zim with a twisted grin. He spoke, in Zims native tongue, "Do not doubt my strength. Have you forgotten I am not human?"

"Fine, but if you end up captured I'm not responsible." Zim shrugged, nodding. Zims antennae twitched. He looked down the hall opposite of Pepito. He felt heat and a ferocious one at that coming from down the hall. A heavy weight seemed to have dropped into the center of his chest. He looked back up at Pepito. The antichrist nodded and both went their own ways. Zim raced down the passages, using his SPYDR legs to pick up the pace when he felt things were going too slowly. He kept following the heat source, the more intense the heat the lighter his instinct felt. Choking on smoke he rounded a corner and skid to a halt. He saw black smoke pouring through the tunnels from under a closed door. Zim ran in front of it and covered his mouth with the front of his shirt. He drew back his foot and kicked the door inwards, jumping back as the flames flew outward in search of that oh-so precious oxygen. Zim waited then lunged forward through the tendrils of fire. Ignoring the stinging flames he stooped as low as he could and called out for his stupid slave, hoping with all his might he wouldn't get a response so he could leave these stinking tunnels. "GIR! GIR,WHERE ARE YOU? ANSWER ME YOU WORTHLESS TIN CAN!"

"IMA REAL VOLCANO!"

Zim barely made out a robot doing pirouettes on a autopsy tray, spewing burning paper airplanes out of his mouth. His silver bodice glowed yellow from heat, and his blue joints, eyes, and chest hatch had been burned black. Zim shouted, "GIR! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WE NEED TO GO!"

Gir stopped and pointed at the table nearby, "What bout Freddy Cruger?" Zim scowled stomping his way over to the insolent fool. He climbed over the autopsy and stumbled over something. Zim looked up and saw he had fallen over the corpse of that tortured fellow. Zim scowled at the stupid corspe and jumped back in fear when its chest moved.

"ZOMBIE!" Zim screamed. The zombie moved it's head slightly and began wheezing as though trying to say something. Zim looked at the man. The blonde tuffets of hair were gone and the heat was making his pink and red patchwork face drop. The table beneath them was turning red along the edges and Zim could distinctly make out the taste of burnt flesh. The mouth of this creature moved up and down and Zim caught him making the same movements as he had the last time this creature had seen the almighty Zim. Frustrated, Zim kicked the ribs of the pathetic corpse, "I can't hear you."

"Ka..il..il… ma...e.." The corpse wheezed. Zim froze and looked at the earthinoid, curious. Instead of asking to save it, it was asking to kill it. Odd reaction. Usually earthinoids avoided pain and did anything to stay alive. Mayhaps this one knew it was too far gone? Possibly. Zim looked at the mans hand which was currently on fire. Zim kicked the hand onto the autopsy table and patted it out with his glove. The hand had been charred black and in the sick smoke, seemed to disappear. Zim stood up and looked hard at the thing for a long time. How long had it been teetering in pain on death's doorstep? he wondered. Zim stared at the disfigured creature for a long time. A very long time. And the living corpse stared back, his eyes, begging, pleading for his own end. Pathetic. Zim turned to Gir and asked him, "Hand me that uh… sharp toothpick?" Gir giggled and complied, handing Zim a glowing hot scalpel. Zims gloves protected his hands so well he only felt the slightest discomfort. He poised the scalpel above the creatures throat and looked up at Gir who gave him a thumbs up. The corpse started sputtering wheezing as he tried to make words rise out of his mouth. Zim looked at him. He thought he heard… no. No, he wouldn't have said that. Not to Zim. Zim put the scalpel to the boys throat and swiftly lacerated his neck. Blood spouted out from the wound like a bloody water fountain, hissing as it made contact with the hot metal table. Some of the blood dried quickly while other trails snaked away from the mainstream falling off the table onto the floor. Zim watched as the boy coughed up blood before furiously stabbing the scalpel through the earthinoids heart with the precision that could only come from decades of training. He felt the scalpel pierce through muscle and tissue until finally after initial resistance impaling the heart. The human earth shuddered and beat… slower and slower until it bled itself out. Zim lifted his hand of the scalpel, and hopped of the table. "Come on, Gir. We've wasted enough time in this cesspool."

"Good bye!" Gir cheerfully said to the corpse. The hopped of the stand onto the floor by his master's side, his yellow bodice shimmering with heat. "He said thank-"

"I know what he said." Zim snapped. He lead the way out pushing everything aside. He didn't have time to wonder or worry. He never worried. He was ZIM! That event meant nothing. He was a soldier. A member of the Irken Elite. He was an Invader. Death means nothing to me, he told himself. "Come on Gir. Let us leave this hell hole!"

"Okay dokey!"