Galaxy 1001D presents:
Washustein; or the Modern Mad Scientist
Starring Washu Hakubi as Doctor Washu Fitzgerald von Washustein
Tenchi Masaki as Tenchi Mancini
Mihoshi Kuramitsu as Mihoshi Gerstell
Aeka Masaki Jurai as Ayeka Jurai
Sasami Masaki Jurai as Sasami Jurai
And Ryoko as the Monster-woman
Tenchi Muyo and all related characters are © AIC/Pioneer/Genon/Funimation. This story is written solely for entertainment and is not intended to make a profit in any way.
Based on "Frankenstein; or, the Modern Prometheus" created by Mary Shelly
And "Tenchi Muyo" created by Masaki Kajishima
Chapter Eleven: They Grow Up So Fast
"Oh my gosh!" Mihoshi coughed on the smoke filling the lab. "I'm so… sorry master!" she apologized as she lifted the reeling Washu to her feet. "I-I don't know what I did wrong! I followed all of your instructions to the letter…"
"It's okay…" Washu said weakly. "This is what always happens when I do this…"
"What?" Mihoshi stared at her employer. Sections of Washu's clothes were singed and bits of ash dirtied her face. The little scientist reeked of smoke and ozone. Mihoshi could barely believe it. "But you said that you've done this dozens of times!"
"If you first don't succeed…" Washu teetered on her feet as her eyes tried to focus.
"Oh…" came a groan from Washu's creation.
"Ryoko!" Mihoshi cried.
That gave Washu the rush of adrenaline she needed to regain her senses. "Let's go see if it worked!"
The two women rushed over to the horizontal figure of Ryoko who was face forward on the floor. Smoke was trailing out of her wild cyan-white hair. They turned her over and fanned their hands at her face. "Ryoko, are you all right?" Mihoshi asked.
Ryoko's topaz yellow eyes bulged open. "Every object in a state of uniform motion tends to remain in that state of motion unless an external force is applied to it!" she exclaimed. "Whoa," she shook her head as she sat up. "What the heck happened to me?"
"Yes!" Washu shouted as she raised a clenched fist to the heavens. "I've done it! My creation has the maturity of an adult! I've finally done it! I am such a genius!"
"You are the greatest Washu!" A little plush Washu appeared on the redhead's right shoulder with the letter 'A' on its blouse cheered.
"You are the greatest genius who ever lived!" A second plush Washu appeared on her right shoulder with the letter 'B' on its blouse agreed.
"Ooh just look at those little guys!" Ryoko smiled as she reached out for the little Washu dolls. "Can I hold them?"
"I know, they're so adorable," Mihoshi nodded as she reached out to pick up one herself.
"Hey! Hands off you two!" Washu snarled as she backed away. Her two homunculi vanished once more. "I can't believe you guys. Eve, how do you feel?"
Ryoko looked around and finally pointed to herself. "Are you talking to me?"
"Of course I'm talking to you," Washu retorted. "Who else would I be talking to?"
"Whom," Ryoko corrected.
"What?" Washu raised an eyebrow.
"Whom is the object," Ryoko explained. "Who is the subject. The proper sentence would be 'Whom else would I be talking to?'"
"Nobody likes a know-it-all, Eve," Washu warned her. "I should know."
"Why are you calling me 'Eve'?" the cyan-haired young woman asked her creator. "My name is Ryoko."
"No it is not!" Washu shook her fist. "I named you 'Eve'!"
"Everybody else calls me 'Ryoko'," her creation shrugged.
"But your name is not 'Ryoko'!" Washu snarled. "It's 'Eve'!"
"But my mother named me 'Ryoko'," the golden-eyed girl insisted.
"I am your mother!" Washu insisted.
"I thought my mother was shorter, with blue hair," Ryoko scratched her head. "She fed me and tucked me in and played with me. She was so kind…"
"I created you!" the redhead growled. "Therefore, I am your mother!"
"You can't possibly be my mother," Ryoko said. "You are grouchy and mean all the time. My mother loves me and you only love yourself."
"She's got you there, master," Mihoshi giggled.
"Will you shut up?!" Washu screeched.
"Sorry," Mihoshi clasped her hands and bowed her head.
"Well, I'm hungry," Ryoko decided. She balled her fists and started howling in anguish. "WAAAAH!"
"Knock it off!" Washu ordered. "What's wrong with you now?"
"Oh nothing," Ryoko shrugged. "I always do this when I'm hungry. Or lonely. Or need a nap. Or scared of something. Or need a change of clothes. It's a real attention getter. Watch." She scrunched her eyes shut and resumed her mournful wailing. "WAAAAH!"
"Cut it out!" Washu commanded. "You don't have to do that anymore. You can talk. You can communicate just fine. Spare our eardrums please."
"But you shout and scream all the time," Ryoko said innocently. "I just thought that was the way it was done."
"'Scuse me?" Washu raised a suspicious eyebrow.
"Yeah you're always whining and hollering to get your way, and the blonde always jumps and gets right on it," Ryoko explained. "I thought that was just the way you get things done around here."
"It may be rude, but you have to admit it's very effective," Mihoshi added.
Washu frowned and closed her eyes. She placed her hand on her head as if she was getting a terrible migraine. "Okay let's start over. Eve, how do you feel?"
"My name's not Eve; it's Ryoko," her creation insisted stubbornly.
The redhead took a deep breath and tried to smile. "Eve. How. Do. You. Feel?" she grimaced dangerously.
"I don't know who you're talking to, 'cause that's not my name," Ryoko sang condescendingly. "My name is Ryoko… if you were my mother you'd know my name… but you don't… 'cause you're not my real mother…"
"I am your real mother!" Washu screeched.
"No you're not, you're just a meanie," Ryoko shrugged. "My real mother couldn't be so mean. No, my real mother was taken way. Someday I'm going to find her, but in the meantime it's time to eat. WAAAAAH!"
"Knock off that shouting!" Washu screamed.
"You first," Ryoko snorted. "I don't like it down here." She extended her hands to the dizzy blonde. "Mihoshi, pick me up."
"Okay," Mihoshi knelt down and put her arms around her.
"Just what do you think you are doing?" Washu sneered as Mihoshi hoisted Ryoko into her arms. "You can walk."
"I can?"
"She can?" Mihoshi repeated.
"Yes," Washu crossed her arms and smiled. "The experiment that transferred my mind data to you also transferred my reflexes and motor control. You should be able to walk as well as I do."
"Well, I don't know," Ryoko glanced up at the ceiling in thought, and then focused on Washu. "Do you walk very well?"
"What kind of question is that?" Washu clenched her fists and stamped her foot. "Of course I do!"
"Just asking," Ryoko shrugged. "Okay, Mihoshi put me down. I'll give this walking thing a try."
"All right," the blonde knelt down and released the week-year-old.
"Okay, let's try this," Ryoko clapped her hands, blew into them and rubbed them together. "Walking... Walking… Okay, getting to my feet… now!" Ryoko lunged to her feet but fell forward and had to use her hands to catch herself.
"You're trying too hard," Washu instructed. "Just don't think about it and it will happen. You know how to do this."
"Mihoshi, could you squat back down for me?" Ryoko asked. "I'd like to see how you do it."
"Right," Mihoshi nodded as she knelt down to get on Ryoko's level. "On the count of three, we'll stand up together. Ready. One… two… three!" Grasping each other's arms, the two women rose to their feet. "You doing all right?"
"Yeah, let's try to get up the stairs," Ryoko suggested. "I think I'm going to have trouble with that."
In the dining room, Mihoshi served a delicious meal of unicorn and Pegasus sausages. Washu had converted the south tower of Castle Washustein into a huge refrigerator and it was perfect for preserving meat.
"Okay, gimmie the sausages," Ryoko gestured to Mihoshi from her side of the table. "I'm gonna dig in!"
"Eve!" Washu gasped from her seat at the other side. "Where are your manners?"
"Oops?" shrugged an embarrassed Ryoko. "Sorry. That isn't the way I'm supposed to say it? Okay, I'll try again." The cyan-haired woman gave an ugly scowl and snarled arrogantly. "Mihoshi, you idiot! Give me the sausages right now!"
"I don't believe this!" Washu gasped. "That's not how you act at the table! You're supposed to say 'please pass me the sausages'. Where were you raised, young lady? In a barn?"
Her creation squinted in concentration. "No, I was raised right here. Unless this is some new kind of barn. Is this a barn? I don't think it's a barn. And what is this word, 'please'? I never hear you using it, but I think I heard Mihoshi use it a couple of times."
"Okay then, you're familiar with the word," Washu snorted. "Go ahead and say 'please' next time."
"Got it," Ryoko nodded. She clasped her hands in a pleading gesture and begged, "Please…! Please…! Please Mihoshi! Give me a sausage! I promise I'll be good! Don't fire me! Give me a sausage please!"
"Knock it off!" Washu ordered. "What the hell was that?"
"I'm saying 'please'," Ryoko explained in a reasonable voice. "That's the way you do it, right? That's the way Mihoshi does it. Or am I supposed to be on my knees when you say 'please'? Sorry, I'm new at this."
"Just say it normally like a normal human being," Washu sighed wearily.
"Uh, well then could you give me an example?" Ryoko asked. "I don't think anyone here qualifies."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Washu bristled.
"Oh nothing! Nothing!" Ryoko smiled and waved at her creator. "Just go ahead and show me how to do it."
"Okay, repeat after me: 'please pass me the sausages'," Washu said testily.
"Please pass me the sausages," Ryoko repeated through clenched teeth, just as her creator did.
"There that wasn't so hard was it?" Washu leaned back in her chair smugly.
"Actually it was," Ryoko replied as Mihoshi served her. "No offense, but you aren't a very good teacher."
"Wha-wha-what?" her creator sputtered. "What do you mean by that? I'll have you know that I became a tenured professor after only five years!"
"You're a professor?" Ryoko asked skeptically.
"Of course I am!"
"You teach people?"
"Yes!" Washu grunted. "That's what professors do!"
"Have any of your students graduated?" Ryoko scratched her head in disbelief.
"Have any of my…!" Washu closed her eyes and growled. "Listen young lady, I am a terrific teacher! Look how fast I managed to teach you."
"Yeah, but you don't do any of the stuff you tell me to do," Ryoko pointed out. "How do I know what you told me is accurate?" She glanced over at Mihoshi as Washu closed her eyes and growled. "Oh Mihoshi, you forgot to cut my sausages up."
"Oops," the blonde shrugged. "Sorry about that, I'll get right on it!" Soon the dizzy domestic was cutting Ryoko's sausages into tiny bite-sized chunks.
"Hey, isn't she old enough to do that herself?" Washu asked testily.
"What?" Mihoshi started in surprise. "A week?"
"She isn't just a week old mentally anymore," Washu explained. "Mentally she's as old as I am."
"But Mihoshi has always cut my sausages up for me," Ryoko protested.
"Yeah, she might choke on them," Mihoshi nodded. "I've got to cut them up, for safety's sake."
Washu clutched her head as another migraine came on. Finally she said. "Can't Eve cut up her sausages herself?"
"Nope," Ryoko answered impudently, "'cause there's nobody here called 'Eve'. I guess Mihoshi or I will have to do it…"
"Eve!" Washu snapped.
"That's not my name…" Ryoko sang mockingly. "If you were my mother you'd know that… but you're not…"
"Stop that!" Washu snapped as she hurled a rubber mallet at Ryoko. It bounced off her creation's head and stopped her annoying chant instantly. As a tear dripped out of Ryoko's angry yellow eye, the cyan-haired woman rubbed her head. "Now behave and eat," Washu ordered. The scientist was nauseated as her creation started shoving her food into her mouth. "Hey! Stop that!"
"Whu?" Ryoko's response was muffled, since her mouth was full.
"For crying out loud, if you're too lazy to cut up your sausages, you could at least chew your food," the short scientist sighed snippily.
"Geeze, what bug crawled up your butt and died?" Ryoko muttered as she cut her sausages into bite size chunks. She paused and picked up a long fat sausage and examined it. "I miss Tenchi. Why did he go away, anyhow?"
"Excuse me?" her creator asked, looking up from her own food.
"I said I miss Tenchi," Ryoko said while staring at her sausage. "For some reason I just started thinking of him."
"I know what you mean," Washu mused as she also picked up a long fat sausage. I can't put my finger on it, but for some reason I was reminded of him."
"But he's nowhere in sight," Ryoko shrugged, her eyes never leaving the erect sausage. "What could have made us think about him?"
"I don't know," Washu frowned as stared at the ceiling as she tapped the tip of her sausage against her chin. "Weird."
"So where is he?" Ryoko asked. "Let's go see him."
"Don't be silly, Eve, I can't possibly show you off while you're a still a barbarian," Washu shook her head.
"WAAAAH!" Ryoko howled. "I wanna see Tenchi! Ow!" she stopped as another rubber mallet bounced off her head.
"You gonna do that every time you don't get your way?" Washu asked her.
"Why sure," Ryoko shrugged. "It almost always worked for me before."
"Mihoshi, get me some more rubber mallets," Washu sighed. "I have a feeling this is going to take awhile."
"You are so mean!" Ryoko frowned. "With you it's just rules-rules-rules isn't it? You just can't stop telling me what to do can you?"
"I'm your creator," Washu snorted arrogantly. "That's what I do."
"Well I don't like it!" Ryoko pouted.
"Cry me a river," the little genius snorted.
"WAAAAH!"
"I was being sarcastic!" Washu shouted. "Listen, you are capable of understanding things now. If you want to live in this house, you are going to have to follow the rules and do what I say! Do you understand?"
"Maybe I don't want to live in this house," Ryoko grumbled. "Maybe I want to go off on my own!"
"Ha!" Washu sneered. "Fat chance, young lady. I created you and I own you! You can't do anything without me and you know it!"
"We'll see about that," Ryoko muttered darkly.
Next: Ayeka's House