Chapter Ten: Plan 45.923: Poke Him
A/N: Oh boy…this will be interesting…sometimes it's kinda fun bringing in random guests:-P
Disclaimer: Uh…………………no
"Where am I?"
"What's that bright light?"
-Groan- "Why does my head hurt?"
I opened my eyes sluggishly and groaned again. The sun was shining brightly, the birds were singing, and it was a perfectly beautifully, cheerful day.
And at the moment I was not happy and cheerful. I wanted everything dead and dark. The pounding in my head commanded it…and the singing of those damn happy birds was deafening
Back to the problem….why did my head hurt again
Let's see…there was that dumb meeting where Voldie nearly ranted to death…Ron got some 'important' paper….um…Voldie was mad…some other dumb stuff I didn't listen to…oh and Voldemander left on some big trip…
That still doesn't explain the headache….
Oh yeah….the party…some Death Eater decided to splurge and have a party….and I was invited on the grounds of also being a Death Eater…go figure
Don't these people realize that I'm underage? Or is the drinking limit different here in Britain? I should've researched this…
Not that I'm complaining…but in America serving alcohol to a 17 year old is kinda illegal…
Of course they got the crappy liquor…reminded me of that 'Victory Gin' they talk about in 1984. Gross…
Ok, back to the problem at hand…my head hurts, I feel completely murderous, I don't think there's any Aspirin, and Voldemort is returning tonight.
So doing the logical thing in this situation, I fell back asleep.
A few hours later I awakened to yet another 'thud'. This time, however, there were three of them.
"Can't anyone find a different window in this goddamn establishment to fall through?" I muttered, loudly. I'm seriously thinking of asking for a promotion to killing…I'm feeling pretty evil at the moment…
It's not just the fact that I've been awakened at 10 p.m. from a giant hangover…no it's also because of the fact that I just hear Voldemort's voice down the hall, laughing manically.
Oh yeah, he's going down.
"Are you sure this is the right room Ron?" a girl's voice asked, worriedly
"Yeah, I'm positive," Ron's voice assured her,
"But you said she was friendly…"
"You woke me up from a massive hangover…I'm not exactly at my friendliest," I spoke up
"That would explain it," a deeper voice said
"Ok, besides Ron, who are you people?" I asked, bluntly
"Well, I'm Hermione, and this is Remus Lupin," the girl's voice answered
"Wow, not Harry?"
"We didn't feel it was safe for him to show up," Ron shrugged.
"Make's sense" and the room lit up from a Lumos spell
"So what brings you to this hellish nightmare of a house?" I asked.
"The Order couldn't believe I actually made it back in one piece, so to prove that I did make it in, I brought a few friends," Ron said
"Gggggreeeeaaaatttt…." I sighed, "Do you realize that Volders just returned from a big trip? He's awake, and by the sounds of it, is in a particularly evil mood." I leaned up against the wall of my room.
"Oh…crap…" Ron groaned
"Do any of you know how to do a good Disillusion spell?" I asked. This was crucial in my plan to annoy Voldie.
"…why?" Lupin asked
Always with the details... "I want to make Voldemort's night a little more miserable, and to do it I need to be invisible…or at least see through."
"Ok…why can't you do it yourself?"
"……because my wand is still on my dresser and I'm too lazy to go get it,"
"…Ok then," Suddenly I felt a really cold sensation. I looked at my hand only not to actually see it.
"This is SO cool," I murmured
"We're going too," Hermione said. I looked at her and the others and they too were see-through.
"Whatever, just don't get killed…it wouldn't make my night any better," I crept out the door, and grinned. The target had been sighted and was only a few feet down the hall to the left of me.
I took off running, and as I passed, I launched a mighty poke into his side.
"WTF?!" Voldemort shrieked, jumping about two feet into the air. I almost started giggling as he started throwing curses in every direction.
I walked back to where Ron, Hermione, and Lupin stood, dumbfounded
"Wow, I feel a little better already," I smiled.
"So are you done torturing him?" Hermione asked
"Nope…I've got a few more pokes in me…" I laughed and took off after the grumbling wizard again.
This time I just tapped him on the shoulder. A bit startled he turned, but saw nothing…he turned around…and I tapped him on the other shoulder.
"…#$&#&" he shouted, throwing even more curses around. Ducking (and giggling like mad. I sprinted away.
"Doesn't he ever suspect you?" Lupin asked
"Um….sometimes….but he can never prove it" I shrugged. Why Voldemort never came after me was still a mystery.
I always assumed it was because I was the young, innocent, American, teenager, without a clue.
Though with the words, AMERICAN, and TEENAGER, you think he'd be a little wiser.
Knowing that he would be turning the corner to the next hallway (and he would be a little more than mad…) I quickly made my way down a few halls, so I would be waiting for him to turn that corner.
And when he did I jumped and hit him right in the head.
I didn't bother to stick around either.
"It was nice seeing you…sort of," I waved half-heartedly as the three spies made their way out the window. I still had a headache…but I felt a little better
They waved back and disappeared into the night.
And I sighed, lifted the Disillusionment and walked over to the conference room. It wouldn't be long before those dreaded words were yelled throughout headquarters. I might as well be ready -sigh-