AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Another really involved chapter and probably the goriest I've ever wrote in this series so you have been warned. :)

I've been wondering if everyone likes the lengths I make them or if too much seems to happen all at once. I tend to go about 4000 words a chapter. Let me know what you think :)

Chapter 9- A Mind is a Terrible Thing to Lose

"Insanity destroys reason, but not wit." — Nathaniel Emmons

Shawn watched as Adam stood and stared, frozen in shock. Probably thinking now that he should have let Shawn go when he had the chance. "Oh God, no…Sam."

Shawn's tongue tingled with the aftertaste of blood and more dripped slowly down from his face. He didn't actually get to feed much from Sam, having been too messy with the wound. The man had bled more on himself, Shawn, and the floor than the vampire had been able to consume. He'd only bitten someone once before, months ago, and it was only on the wrist so Shawn had no idea that neck wounds bled out so quickly and had been unprepared for sheer volume of it.

Shawn gaze bored into Adam, and he growled treacherously, but suddenly hissed in pain and clutched his chest with his free hand. He rode out the intense stabbing pain as blood replenished his dying system. Ben had practically drained Shawn dry and he was moments from death when the unsuspecting Sam had come within his grasp. By then, it had been about survival. No thinking, no remorse, just pure instinct.

The pain shooting through his body brought Shawn back to reality for a split second and he thought, What have I done? I just killed a man! His emotions skyrocketed and he roared loud in both pain and anguish.

Adam brought his hands over his ears as the loud screechy roar echoed in the building.

The spreading pain quickly subsided and Shawn's screams stopped. His vision cleared and soon he was able to breathe easier, but his breaths still came in short panicked gasps. He was losing himself, and he knew it. The trauma and the bloodlust was consuming him and already threatening to turn him into an emotionless, instinctual, killing machine. Like Ben. Think of Julies, the baby… anything! Focus!

He couldn't focus though, too much pain, too much hunger.

Movement caught his attention and his head snapped up. Adam had backed up farther from him and was eyeing him warily. He steadied himself and fingering his cross asked in a shaky voice. "Where are the others? What did you do to them?"

Now he grows a conscience. Shawn's lip curled. "Oh really? You stand there, clutching your little relic and act like you're some kind of good guy because you care about your friends? Huh Jack?" Shawn had cased out each and every one of these guys the minute he woke up from his head wound, he was done being nice. "The truth is, you are nothing but a scared little boy, who has to have other people around him to make him feel important!" Shawn grinned at Adam's crestfallen look. He'd hit the mark. Dead on.

"Lemme guess, big kid all through high school, always teased until you really filled out. Then like magic... everyone wants to be your friend. Then they started asking you to do their dirty work. Beat up this guy, intimidate that guy. They didn't like you, they used you, idiot. And these schmucks," Shawn nodded at the body. "You think these guys are any different? Tell me, how many times have you had to shelve your values when Zack tells you to jump?"

"How the hell do you know that?!" Adam snapped.

"Something wrong?" The venomous words kept coming out before Shawn could stop them. He'd always had a hard time controlling his mouth, especially when he was pissed off, let alone off his rocker. "You gonna cry big guy? Need a tissue perhaps? I suggest Puffs. They have ones with lotion now. No more chapped noses."

"Zack was right," Adam gaped. "You really are nothing but a monster."

Shawn blanched at Adam's words. They'd done this to him. They decided to hold him prisoner, threaten his family, and they were now reaping the consequences. They deserve what they get… "Look in the mirror, you'll see who the real monster is..." Shawn grinned madly and sniffed, taking in the musk of fear. "Speaking of monsters, it's not me you have to worry about anymore. You guys had your chance to stop this train…and ya missed it. Too late to get off now." His smile turned into to manic giggles.

Now that he wasn't in agonizing pain, Shawn clearly felt the second link in his mind that connected him to Ben. It felt like an intrusion, and that's exactly what it was. He'd been drained and forced to turn someone. Shawn felt violated and despised Ben even more now, if such a thing were even possible.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Adam was confused and freaked out by Shawn's laughter. "What train? Who do I need to worry about?"

The back door abruptly slammed open causing the tightly coiled Adam jump back and fall over some of the loot that had been knocked down earlier. He cursed and tried to stand up.

Shawn, however, didn't react at all. He already knew who it was, and who was with him.

Juliet hated to wait around. She was never the "Woman in Distress" type. She was always the kind of person who felt completely useless if she wasn't out there trying to get results. Maddie was being as supportive as she could, considering the circumstances of the last couple days, but it gave Juliet no comfort to know that she couldn't help.

It wasn't the fact that she wanted to rush into danger. She'd had enough of that for a lifetime crammed into the three months since Shawn and Carlton had been turned. She'd been held hostage by crazed vampires twice, and had almost lost Shawn forever. She just wanted to be there for him, as he had been there for her.

Henry and Gus had called a few minutes earlier to let them know that they had called in Mick. She'd asked if they were calling in Team Bartowski which consisted of Shawn's blood brother Morgan and his friends in their company Carmichael Industries, but they'd said they would wait until Mick checked it out before they called in the big guns. She'd gone along with their decision but part of her wanted to pull out all the stops to get her man back.

"Juliet, sweetie are you okay?" Maddie saw how quiet her son's fiancé had gone.

Looking up, Juliet managed a sad smile. "Just tired." She laid her hand on her stomach and waited for a kick, trying not to think of how she'd raise the baby alone.

Maddie rose from the chair and sat down beside Juliet on the couch, grabbing her hand. "I'm sorry."

Juliet looked at her confused, "What?"

Taking a deep breath, Maddie explained, "I'm sorry for the way I treated Shawn. I'd take it all back if I could." She dropped Juliet's hand and wiped away tears. "I was just afraid. Afraid of what it meant for Shawn to be… what he is."

Any lingering anger she had towards Maddie melted away at those words. She understood completely. She was afraid as well when she found out, but Shawn was around to win her back. Hopefully soon, he'll be around to win his mom back. "I'm sure he knows. You were both just upset."

They passed the next half hour talking of better times and waiting for Henry and Gus to arrive. What they hadn't expected was Carlton to come stumbling into the house.

The detective didn't even bother knocking, not after what he'd just been through. He almost made it to the house when the electric sensation struck again, not once, but twice in rapid succession. He'd barely made it to the side of the road without crashing his car. Many deep breaths later he managed to make it to Henry's house and made it in the door before falling down.

Juliet and Maddie were instantly at his side. "Carlton! What happened?" Juliet looked over her partner for any obvious wounds before turning to Maddie. "In the fridge, in the bottom drawer, grab some blood quick."

Maddie's eyes widened. She looked closer at Carlton and realized he had the same pallor as her son. She started to head to the kitchen when Carlton stopped her.

"Wait, I'm alright. I-I just need to sit down for a second." Juliet helped Carlton to his feet and led him to the couch. Maddie, however, was still keeping her distance.

"What happened? Did it have something to do with Shawn?" Juliet asked, not sure if she wanted to know the answer.

Carlton shook his head. "Damn it, I don't know O'Hara. I called Mick the same time Guster called him and he'll be here in about an hour." Juliet nodded, she already knew the other vampire was on the way to help. "I got this, feeling. Imagine an electrode hooked up to your brain and someone zaps you. It's happened three times so far and I have no clue what it means."

He hated to tell Juliet this, but it was something she had to know. If it did have to do with Shawn, she would shoot him if he didn't say anything. Sniffing, he turned towards Maddie who was radiating the sweet smell of fear. He cringed a bit as the emotional wave hit him as well. Fear of him and fear for her son. "Dr. Spencer." Carlton nodded, trying to put the woman at ease but failing miserably.

Henry and Gus came in at that moment and saved Carlton from any more social awkwardness.

Henry's brow furrowed at the sight of a disheveled Carlton sitting on his couch. "Lassiter, what are you doing here?"

"He may have picked up on something from Shawn." Juliet cut in.

Carlton glared at his partner. Henry was a man of specifics, and he would want to know exactly what was going on with Carlton, but the detective couldn't give him answers he himself didn't know. "It might be related to Shawn." Carlton explained the weird feelings he'd experienced but stressed the fact that he had no idea what they were.

"Oh, it might be related to Shawn. That's really informative Lassiter." Henry grumbled before going over to Maddie.

Carlton stood up quickly and glared at Henry, "When you get the manual on "How to be a Vampire" Spencer, you let me know!"

Gus stepped between the glowering men, "This isn't helping anyone, especially Shawn." He looked back and forth between the two of them until both had relaxed and Carlton went back to sitting on the couch. "Alright, I say we get our facts straight now and try to figure out what we know so we can tell Mick as soon as he gets here."

Nods came from around the room and everyone discussed the details as they waited for the cavalry to show up.

Mick showed up a little before 9pm. Darkness was just falling. He'd driven as fast as he could to get there, hoping it wasn't already too late. Everyone seemed convinced that Shawn had been kidnapped as opposed to running off so Mick went with their assumptions.

Carlton, having heard him pull up, met him at the door. "St. John." He nodded.

"Lassiter."

The detective led the way to the house and Mick spied the living room was full of worried friends and family. "Mick." Juliet greeted and gave him a small hug. His eyes lingered on her stomach and he gave her a small smile.

After greetings and introductions were exchanged it was all down to business. They'd done what Gus had suggested and compiled all the evidence of Shawn's whereabouts.

They knew he had parked his car near the college and headed out on foot. Carlton said the area around the safe in the second hand store smelled like the ocean, and Gus said that somehow between leaving the store and chasing down a car, Shawn figured out where the thieves where hiding.

Mick nodded once he had all the information. "Okay, let's head to where Shawn's car was. I'll see if I can track him."

"Yeah, I tried that, too many people have already trampled through the place. Damn college students." Carlton huffed.

"No offense detective, but I have a bit more experience than you at tracking by scent." Carlton made a face but he knew Mick was right. "Let's head out." He got up and everyone in the room started to follow. "Woah, all of you are coming?"

Everyone looked around the room and started to argue about who was and wasn't coming.

Henry didn't want Maddie to go. No one wanted Juliet to go, and Carlton thought everyone should stay back because they were liabilities. Mick shouted above the throng of upset voices. "HEY! Everyone calm down." He pointed at Juliet and Maddie, "If you guys come, you stay back and stay in the car. We can't stand here and argue." With that, he ran to his car.

Everyone else followed closely behind him, Juliet still grumbling about having to stay in the car. Mick didn't blame her. He practically had to tie his girlfriend Beth to a chair to get her to stay.

Carlton and Juliet took one vehicle and the rest of them, Gus, Maddie and Henry climbed in his Mercedes.

When Mick pulled into the college parking lot, Gus' phone rang. He excitedly picked it up without looking, hoping it was somehow Shawn. "Hello?!"

Coraline's voice came over the receiver. "Gus? I was wondering if you had time to meet tonight."

Gus' eyes widened. He'd completely forgotten about Coraline. She could have helped look for Shawn. Feeling like an idiot he was about to ask, then remembered Mick. Gus hadn't yet had the opportunity, or the guts, to let Mick know that he was hanging out with his ex-wife trying to develop a new cure. He had to get her off the phone quick. "Uh, I can't talk right now. I'm going to have to call you back."

"Is there something wrong?" The concern in her voice was touching, but Mick was starting to stare at Gus in the rear view mirror with a suspicious gaze. Vampires had good hearing and it looked like he started to recognize her voice.

"I'll tell you later I'm sorry but-"

Henry gave Gus a puzzled look. "Is that Coraline?" Gus widened his eyes and shook his head in a warning gesture. "Get her to the college! She can help find Shawn."

"Shawn's missing?" Coraline asked while at the same time Mick's hand darted to the back seat snatching the phone. The icy look he gave Gus was so cold it could have frozen time. "Gus? Gus are you there?"

"Hello Coraline." Mick said evenly as Gus sank farther into the back seat.

"Mick? Is that you?" Mick hadn't talked to or seen Coraline since her brother Lance had kidnapped her years ago. He'd thought she was dead or at least in Europe.

"You have a lot of explaining to do Coraline! What the hell is going on? How do you know Gus?"

"Well, it's complicated. He's helping me with something." Mick could hear the uncertainty in her voice.

Mick shook his head and tossed the phone over his shoulder back to Gus. "We need to talk later."

"Okay... sure." Gus stuttered then went back on the phone. Coraline was yelling on the receiver for someone to answer her about Shawn. "Coraline, I have to go. Mick is helping search for Shawn, something happened to him."

"Can I help?"

Gus would have appreciated the offer earlier, but they were already there and had to go now. "Thanks but I'll keep you updated. Mick is going to sniff him out."

"Let me know if you need me." The words sent a little flutter through his heart he hoped Mick missed hearing.

"Sure. I'll let you know. Bye." Gus hung up and saw that Maddie and Henry both were giving him wide eyed looks.

"I'll explain later." Gus hopped out of the car to join the others. No need for an already complicated situation to get even more complicated. What mattered now was finding Shawn.

Carlton pulled in right after Mick. He could instantly tell there was some tension between him and Gus. "What's going on?"

Mick's head swiveled in his direction. "Did you know my ex-wife was going out with Gus?"

"We're not going out!" Gus protested, coming towards them from around the other side of the car.

"Coraline...You mean Lance's sister? No... I thought you said she was missing, presumed dead?" He turned to Gus. "Guster what the hell are you getting into?" From what he'd heard from Mick, she was a very manipulative person.

"I am a grown ass man Lassie." Gus put his nose in the air defiantly. "If I want to have a business proposition with a woman, I can." Carlton's nose wrinkled in disgust as Gus realized the implicated meaning of what he had said. "You know what I mean!"

Henry stormed up, "Would you guys focus! Guster's love life can wait." He looked over to Maddie who had gone to stand by Juliet, she didn't quite know what to think of the situation but seemed to be trying hard not to freak out.

Mick was already at the spot where Shawn's car used to be, before Buzz had driven it home, and sniffed deeply, his eyes closed. Sorting through the scents of all the college students that had trampled through the area was hard, and finding one scent from over a day before was even harder. He walked in a larger circle and stopped once he caught something. "Was Shawn wearing something in his hair?"

"Whatever." Juliet stated. The group gave her puzzled and concerned looks before she blushed and explained. "Axe's 'Whatever' hair clay. Swears by it and wears it every day."

"Oh." Mick stated and sniffed a bit more. "I got something."

Carlton threw Juliet the keys to his Ford Fusion. "I'll go with Mick. The rest of you follow us in the car."

"Let's go!" Jules spun around excitedly and raced to the car.

Mick sped with Carlton on his heels to the East. Once they started getting to some taller buildings he lost the scent. "Damn it!" Mick cursed and looked around.

Carlton frowned. He knew Shawn wouldn't have been purposefully putting anyone off his trail, there would be no need. "Spencer what did you do?" He mumbled to himself. Suddenly it came to him. "He went on the roof!" Carlton looked up and jumped. Once on the roof he saw footprints in the dirt. "He was here!"

Mick jumped up right after him. Crouching and checking the prints. "Great! Let's go!"

A few building hops later the trail disappeared again. They had gotten to a storage yard and apparently Shawn had jumped down to enter it. Carlton pulled his side arm and proceeded with caution. This place screamed bad news.

Following the scent again Mick came up to one of the smaller buildings, stopping abruptly. "Crap." He looked over and saw Juliet pulling slowly on the dirt road leading up to where they were. He made a few hand signals for her to stop.

"What?" Carlton asked.

"I smell blood."

Carlton growled and sniffed. Sure enough it was blood. Both human and vampire. He didn't know if he was more relieved that they'd found him, or angry that he'd been hurt. Cocking his gun he nodded at Mick. "Let's do this."

Sliding next to the side doors, Carlton opened it quietly and slipped in.

As soon as they opened the door the scent of blood was overwhelming. There was a trail of it leading from the door down a hallway into the main storage area. Valuable clothing and other merchandise lined the walls in mostly organized piles, but it looked like some had been knocked down, and others had been hastily grabbed.

The walls confirmed that this was the Las Arañas hide out. The same spider motif was painted multiple times, as if someone were practicing. They quickly came to the end of the hallway and got a better look at the main room.

In the center of the room was a dead man. A smallish man with brown hair, lay sprawled on his back, covered in blood. The entire area around him was also completely covered in blood, so much that it resembled a cheap slasher film where they slather on so much blood you don't notice the bad effects. This was no effect though, some violent and horrible things had happened here, very recently.

"We missed them by a half an hour at most." Mick mirrored Carlton's thoughts.

Moving closer but keeping his weapon ready, Carlton went to check out the man's wounds. He feared the worst. Sure enough, the whole right side of the man's neck was a mess of vicious bite marks. They had gotten there too late.

Mick took one look and knew what happened. "It's from Shawn."

Carlton stood angrily. "You don't know that! Spencer couldn't do this."

"Yeah, I do. Look." He pointed to another, large pool of blood a few feet away. "All that is vampire blood. So are all the droplets around the floor."

Looking around, Carlton noticed all the other pools of blood. Carlton had heard the story from Juliet about Shawn being stuck in a freezer, starving and newly turned. He'd refused to drink from a girl his sire Aaron had procured for him and ended up saving both himself and the woman. If Shawn had ended up feeding, it must have been really really bad. "My God, what did they do to him?"

"I don't know-"

Quiet voices coming from the hallway signaled that Gus, Juliet and Henry had made it into the building. They peeked around the corner making sure it was safe to enter. "O'Hara, you might not want to see this. You too Guster."

Gus was already putting his hand to his nose, having smelled the blood from almost outside. "I'll stay back here."

Henry walked up and took in the scene. Carlton could see where his and Shawn's investigative practices were similar, both took in the entire room before focusing on the smaller details one by one. "He was tortured." Henry said quietly.

Juliet put her hand to her mouth in shock. She didn't doubt for a second that Henry was right. "Oh no. No... Shawn."

"GUS! Get her out of here!" Mick hollered and Gus started to tentatively head towards Juliet.

"NO! I'm staying." She steeled herself and nodded at Gus, who seemed relieved he didn't have to go anywhere near the dead body.

"Guster, come with me then, we'll check the rest of the place out." Carlton walked more towards the front of the building. Gus stayed close to the walls, away from any and all things blood covered.

Once they were to the front they noticed that the loading gate where Semi trucks pulled up was wide open, and next to the open door was another body. This one seemed to be an older man with a paunch belly. His trucker's hat was askew and his eyes bulged in frozen horror. Probably because his entire throat was missing. Well, not missing exactly. It was laying ten feet away in a red clump of sinew and skin.

Gus couldn't take it anymore. He ran out the front door and Carlton heard him vomit violently.

Holding back the bile in his own throat he reached into the man's pocket and found a commercial class license. So this is the truck driver. He hurried back to Mick, who was still standing in the middle of the main room. He had a phone in his hand and was just hanging up.

"There's another body, the truck driver. His throat was torn out. Whatever happened, it looks like they took the truck, and Shawn."

Juliet paled further. "If his throat got torn out... you think Shawn-"

"We don't know what to think yet sweetie." Henry stopped her. He didn't want to believe Shawn could do this any more than she did. "What do we do now?"

The options were grim. They had no idea who the other people in the gang were, or if they were still alive. If they weren't it meant Shawn was running around out there somewhere, crazed and alone. Carlton didn't want to think of that scenario.

"We can ID the bodies and find some connections. Put out an APB on the driver's semi and we can get a lead that way. And O'Hara..." Carlton swallowed. "Call the Chief."

Juliet nodded sadly and walked out the back door. The vampires politely ignored the sobs they heard from her once she was outside, away from prying eyes.

Mick took another look at the body and shook his head. "I called the cleaners. They should be here in an hour or so to take care of the vampiric evidence. Anything else, I'm sure your Coroner will help out with it."

"Yeah, but if Spencer did this, what will the cleaners do to him?"

Mick stayed silent. It usually depended on the situation and the magnitude. Killings were looked down upon, not because the cleaners really valued human life, but because it was really hard to cover up murders nowadays. If Shawn had done anything to endanger their secrecy, there wasn't anything Mick or anyone else could do for him.

END NOTES:

I really love the quote at the beginning of the chapter. It really says how I am having Shawn lose it and stays true with what I've said in earlier stories about crazed vampires still having their personalities, which makes Mick's job really hard sometimes.

Hope you guys liked the reintroduction of Mick! Late in the story I know but still. He's fun to have around.