England had been too late. Just a few seconds too late. If only he had remembered his mistake earlier. Unfortunately, that hadn't been the case. He had gotten to the bathroom just as America had lifted the toilet seat up.

There it was. Just sitting in the toilet. There wasn't a lot in there, so it wasn't very gross-looking. But it was still there. It was there, showing itself to America. Of course something like this would happen to England. Of course bad luck would keep falling upon him. It's always been like that.

A pang of guilt struck England when he saw the look on America's face. No, no, no, he didn't want to see that expression. That's what he tried to prevent. But, of course, nothing ever goes as planned when it comes to him.

England stood there, outside the bathroom doorway, frozen, unable to say a thing. Unable to explain himself and his actions. All he can do is stand there, and brace himself for whatever will happen next. Maybe America's going to throw him out. Maybe he won't want to have England staying with him after finding out England threw up in his house. These kinds of thoughts actually worried England.

"A-America..."

That was all England could utter. He didn't have the strength to say anything else. He felt weak, like he could faint any moment now.

"England... why? Just why?"

Why what? Why was he throwing up? Why was he depressed? Those were questions that England didn't want to answer. Those were questions that England wanted to avoid.

England barges through the doorway to the bathroom. He flushes the toilet and slams the lid down. He didn't want America to see it.

Just as he's about to leave, a hand grabs onto his shirt and pulls him close. He's spun around and comes face to face with America, America gripping his shoulders to keep him there.

Surprisingly, there's no anger in America's eyes. England had been expecting America to be pissed off at him for throwing up again. Instead, America's eyes are filled with sadness.

"I know that... these kinds of things take a while to fix. I know that, trust me. But... I want to understand... why you're doing this..."

They stand there like that for a few moments, neither of them saying anything. All you could hear in the bathroom was their breathing. England was forced to look into America's eyes, even though he desperately wanted to look away.

This could be England's chance. He could tell America everything. Get everything off his chest.

But England didn't say anything. Not one word. He still couldn't find it in him to do so. After a couple minutes of silence, America sighs and lets go of England's shoulders.

"You should just go take your nap," America says. He walks past England out of the bathroom. England stands there by himself for a few moments before he finds the strength to walk back to the guest bedroom.

Once he got back to the room and shut the door, he fell to the ground and broke down crying. He didn't want this. He didn't want America to be disappointed in him. He knew he should've just argued more about staying with America. If only he had been stronger enough to fight back at the time...

That's right. He still needs to get stronger. Sitting here crying will do nothing for him. It won't help him.

England stands back up, wiping his tears. He heads over to the bed and lies down, not even bothering to get inside the covers or sheets. He started thinking about the good times in his life, like when he had an empire. When he was actually categorized as strong. He missed those times.

XxXxX

America wasn't mad at England. How could he be? Although, even though he wasn't angry, he WAS upset. Not just at England, but at himself, too. He was supposed to be keeping an eye on England, yet he had left England out of his sight for only a few minutes, and England had thrown up again. So from now on, he'll try his best to be better at keeping a watch on England.

One of the biggest questions that's been wracking his brain was "Why?". Why was England doing this? America has been wondering this ever since he first found out about England's problem, and he still has no answers. He's trying, though. He's truly trying to figure all of this out. He wants to help England as much as he can. It's just that England won't tell him what's wrong. He wind tell America why he's acting the way he is. How's America supposed to help him if he doesn't know what's going through his head?

Everything had seemed fine about a month before the last meeting. England had been arguing with him and France, as usual. There didn't seem to be anything off about him at the time. Then again... after that meeting, no one had seen or heard from him until the meeting they had a couple days ago.

I wonder what had happened...

America knew it'd probably be a while before England will feel comfortable enough to open up to him. England had a hard time opening up to people. England was a distant kind of guy, after all. America always wondered why England liked to be alone a lot. Isn't it lonely?

What if he actually doesn't like to be alone, though?

That thought has occurred to America before, but he didn't think about it that much before. Although, right now, he just keeps wondering to himself how England is when no one around. What he thinks about. What he worries about. He wants to know everything.

Maybe living in the same house with England again could help the both of them. He could help England with his problem, all the while learning even more about the feelings England has now.

I want to help him…