Note: This is the last chapter before the final group is revealed. If you have any favorite characters you want included leave a review and tell me as soon as possible.
Chapter 5 – Mmmgood
It was mid-afternoon when the first heat was completed and the rest of the contestants were starving.
"Are they gonna give us a break for lunch?" Mallow asked Geno.
"I sure as hell hope so." He replied.
As if an answer to his question, the cheery announcer toad stepped up to the microphone. "Attention. I'm sure you are all very hungry…"
There were nods of agreement from everyone in the crowd.
"…Too bad, suck it up. But I do have some good news about the next portion of the elimination. It's a taste contest. We put a blindfold on you and you tell us what the substance is."
Mario laughed. "I have a bad feeling about this… she said substance not food."
The announcer toad pointed to a medium-sized pavilion close by. "Once your name is called, please enter the tent over there. You will promptly be blindfolded and given further instructions. Thank you."
Peach was one of the first names to be called and she made her way to the testing area. She was given a blindfold, which she put on, and was seated. A judge stepped forward.
"You will be given twenty substances and you must try to correctly identify as many as you can. If you will recall you signed a release form at the registration tables, in the contract you agreed that we will not be liable for any and every injuries or death that may occur due to the contest."
She suddenly got very scared; she didn't even read the fine print on that thing, who does?
"Peach, here is your first substance." The judge handed her a small bowl. She hesitantly stuck her tongue out and tasted it. It was salty and warm, it had a sticky texture to it as well. Peach quickly spit it out.
"You damn sickos! Was that… oh God, I can't even say it."
The judge smiled as he tauntingly continued. "What was the substance, Peach?"
She let out a long sigh before she whispered the answer. "Sperm."
"What? I can't hear you, could you speak up?"
"Sperm."
"One more time."
She shouted this time. "It's SSSSPPPPEEEERRRRMMMM! You know, the stuff that comes out of your dick!"
Her voice was heard throughout the palace grounds. "I think I'm going to be sick…" Mario exclaimed.
"What are they doing to my daughter? This is an outrage!" Toadstool started to totally freak out and some of the game show regulators tried to calm him down.
"Don't tell me to be quiet! This show is cancelled immediately! Where is my daughter? Bring me my daughter! Get your damn hands off me." Eventually they shot him with a tranquilizer.
Back in the tent the judge was laughing. "I'm surprised a princess like you would know that. That must mean you've tasted it before."
Peach could feel her cheeks flush with embarrassment. "Get on to the next item before I kill you."
"Well, that was correct none-the-less." He handed her the next vial.
She tasted it and her noise quickly wrinkled in disgust. "Ew… is that bleach! What are you trying to do? Kill everyone."
"Correct." The judge replied. Peach wasn't sure if he meant correct for the answer or correct on wanting to kill everyone.
Meanwhile in an opposite room…
"Here is your first substance, Amazee Dayzee." He handed the retarded flower the small plastic dish.
She brought it to her mouth and consumed the whole thing, which happened to be deer urine. "…TUKI-TUKI-TUKI-TUKI!"
The judge looked around. "What the hell is she saying?"
"TUKI-TUKI-TUKI-TUKI!"
The judge decided he didn't feel like putting up with her shit. "Why, look! That was the right answer, you move on. Just get the hell out of here."
"TUKI-TUKI-TUKI-TUKI!"
In yet another room…
"Hello Luigi, here is your first substance."
He tasted it and quickly vomited. "What the f–"
"Now, now. This is only rated T."
"I'm allowed one f-bomb then. That was the FUCKING most disgusting thing I've ever tasted in my whole damn life. Was that skunk secretions?"
The judge grinned. "That is correct."
In Mario's area…
"Was that gun powder?" He asked in disbelief.
"Yes, that's correct." She handed him the next container.
Mario smelt if before he tried to taste it, gagging from the odor. "Oh lord, do I have to taste this?"
"I'm sorry… no, I'm really not. You do have to taste it."
He finally got the courage to taste the gross liquid. "…Sewage?"
"You have to be more specific."
"Retirement home sewage?"
The judge chuckled. "Yes, that's correct."
Out of all the rooms only three of them had items that were not the vilest things the producers could come up. Toadette was one of the lucky ones.
"Peanut butter… mouthwash… Oreos… chicken with Alfredo sauce and a dash of ptarmigan cheese… mmm, steak medium rare with a hint of pepper…"
"Wow, your dashing through these with ease."
As a result, Toadette guessed correctly on all twenty dishes. Bowser, conveniently… more like due to bribery, and Bowser Jr. were the other two lucky competitors that got easy things to taste.
The other poor contestants got things like liver and other body parts, feces from various animals, cleaning chemicals, maybe one or two actual food items if they were fortunate, and whatever the hell the evil judges felt like making them eat.
"I have the results… the top three finishers are… Toadette…"
She smiled happily. "Well… it was easy."
All of the other contestants looked her way and various cries of anger were expressed. "Easy? What the hell are you talking about!" "Yea! I had to eat grass…" "Grass? That's nothing compared to elephant shit!" "What do you mean easy!"
Toadette looked around confused. "I had things like candy, Oreos, French fries, and steak."
"WHAT?" They all huddled around her, a look of insanity on their faces. They were ready to attack when the announcer spoke up.
"If you lay a finger on the poor girl all of you are disqualified."
A crazed goomba made his way over to the cowering Toadette. "Oh yea? How will you know which of us hit her or not?"
The announcer giggled. "We have video cameras everywhere… even up in the sky so we have a perfect view from above, we will know who touches her or not."
The contestants looked up and saw a blimp circling the castle. They all backed away from the frightened Toadette and decided it wasn't worth it… it wasn't her fault anyway.
"That's the right move. Now… the other top three finishers… Bowser…"
The participants shook their heads; they all knew he cheated somehow.
"…And Amazee Dayzee?" The announcer was bewildered by this as well as all the other challengers.
"How did that moron get any right?" They looked over at her and she was chasing a butterfly while yelling, "TUKI-TUKI-TUKI-TUKI!"
"I guess we'll never know." The announcer toad mumbled as the judge who passed her through secretly made his way out.
After the taste challenge, only five-hundred contestants remained. The next test to get the number down to the final fifty was a 10-Person Melee, only one person moved on out of each group.
One of the unfortunate groups had to put up with Amazee Dayzee. All the other nine contestants in her group tried to kill her but she just kept on running around in circles.
"That's it! I can't take it anymore!" One koopa yelled and jumped off the stage.
"TUKI-TUKI-TUKI-TUKI!"
One goomba started shaking violently. "My head, my head! Why won't she stop saying tuki-tuki?" His skull burst from her annoying voice.
The announcer toad hung her head in disappointment. "I can't believe it… Amazee Dayzee is one of the fifty finalists."
A correspondent for the TV show quickly went over to her. "How does it feel to be a part of the final group, Amazee Dayzee."
"TUKI-TUKI… TUKI?" She started eyeing his microphone.
"Why are you staring at me like that?"
"TUKI YUM YUM!" She jumped on top of the reporter and started chewing on his mic.
"Get this little bitch off of me!" He started running around yelling, flailing his arms up and down. It was no use though; she ate the whole microphone before she finally got off and let out a loud burp.
Meanwhile…
Yoshi found himself in a group with no one major except one of the Axem Rangers. The other eight competitors were quickly eliminated. It was just one on one, mono y mono, a duel, heads up… I think you get the picture.
"You're going down you dumb dino." The yellow ranger shouted as he charged him.
Yoshi noticed a black Mushroom nearby. 'I wonder what this does.' He quickly ate it. It appeared to have no affect. That was until the Axem ranger tried to kick him and went through Yoshi and off the edge of the level.
"NOOOOOO! That was such a cheap thing to do!" The defeated ranger yelled as he fell into the oblivion.
Yoshi smiled. "That was easy."
The red Axem ranger glared at Yoshi. "I will avenge you, my friend. I will not let that animal make a fool of the Axem Rangers!
"The winner of this match is Yoshi!"
Yoshi and surprisingly Amazee Dayzee made it through and both secured spots as one of the fifty finalists. But who will be the forty-eight other contenders?