It was a gorgeous day.
The sun hung lazily in the pale, early morning sky. It seemed not white-hot as it often was, but a pale, inviting golden color. Clouds edged the blue, almost threateningly, but they were white and fluffy- nothing like the ominous gray storm clouds that would soon be followed by rain. The temperature was remarkably placid for a day in the midst of August; it seemed odd, wedged in between stiflingly scorching bouts of weather. Even if one were to feel uncomfortably hot, they would have the cool breeze that batted at the city to lean back upon. Many people appeared to be taking advantage of this fine day; the usually quiet, secluded forests nearby were abuzz with hikers, play-parks bustled with excited children and their ever-chasing parents… even the paved streets of Toronto seemed busier, as if numerous citizens had decided to walk to their destinations in place of driving or using other methods of transportation. The hazy dreariness that accompanied heat had temporarily vanished, though doubtless it would soon return.
William had decided to take the climate as a good omen, having woken up in high spirits. The previous day had been spent with Susannah, and as he had not seen his younger sister in person for several weeks, and he had enjoyed their time together thoroughly. He was sure that she had as well, but… underneath her liveliness, there had been a trace of worry. There had certainly been something off about her, and though William knew his sister well, he had been unable to ascertain what. Near the end of his visit, he had dared to ask her about it- and she had more or less bitten his head off. It was clear that she wasn't yet ready to share whatever it was that was bothering her, and though he concerned, William was prepared to be patient. She would confide in him eventually, and he would help in any way possible. It had always been that way between them.
As William walked, he found himself becoming almost metaphorical. If the beauty of the day symbolized the outcome of his upcoming coffee with Julia, then surely the looming clouds represented the nerves that chipped away at him. His anxiety had much waned since his encounter with her at the film premiere, but it was still present, spread thinly across the corners of his mind. With some assistance from Susannah and George, who was incredibly excited for his roommate, William had been able to put Julia's movie-star status out of his mind. She was an ordinary person, after all. Acting was simply her job. There was no need to be uneasy about that aspect of their date, no need to feel as if he wasn't suited to her. Just a job, he had reminded himself, frequently, whenever his thoughts turned to what was to come-, which, quite frankly, was often.
His nervous tension wasn't entirely depleted, in spite of this. William was a worrier at heart, and Susannah never missed an opportunity to gripe at him for this, in a playful manner. He supposed this was because of all the time spent worrying as a child- worrying about his father returning home each night, worrying about his sister's wellbeing, worrying about both of their misty, open-ended futures… the habit, he thought wryly, had stuck. William had been on dates before, but, peculiarly, this one seemed different; more important. He'd never quite felt the way he did around Julia prior to meeting her. Never before had his heart so wildly hammered in his chest; never before had he so desperately wanted to know more about another person. He couldn't afford to mess this up.
William crossed the road amid a thick group of people, his eyes fixed ahead as the coffee shop in which he had first encountered Julia came slowly into view. The place was small and worn, with washed-out beige bricks pattering its surface and bits of paper- now unreadable posters- clinging to its wall. He could see exactly why Julia had chosen this place. As an A-list celebrity, paparazzi and reporters would expect her to dine at Toronto's finest and most expensive restaurants. This diminutive Tim Hortons was tucked out of the way discreetly; it was unlikely that anybody would look for Julia here. William felt gratitude flicker through him at this. He'd seen his share of vicious, celebrity-slamming articles, and had no wish to end up in one of them due to his time spent with Julia Ogden. A poisonous seed of notion, crammed into the very edge of his mind, began to extend its draping tendrils across his thoughts, souring them. If something were to happen between Julia and him… improbable as this was, he reminded himself yet again… everything he knew would change, be flipped around. Privacy shattered. Secrets divulged in newspapers and magazines. Ceaseless queries and intrusions, needling their way into his life. Normalcy would be thrown out of the window as soon as his ties to Julia were discovered. William was unsure if he could live the way she did, and he frowned deeply as he swung open the door of the shop and entered. The small, rectangular room was fairly busy, compared to the usual standard of the store, but for once, William appreciated the buzz and the bustle. The last thing they needed was their conversation to be overheard.
Julia was seated at a small table for two, just beside the tinted windowpane. Her arms were folded tightly over her chest, and her head was ducked, her hair falling forward and shielding her face. Spread out across the exterior of the table was a newspaper; freshly printed, William guessed. As he moved closer, he was able to read snatches of bold print. The words Premiere, stars, discussion, and resentful jumped out at him, and he sighed as he sat down across from Julia. "Has there been some sort of controversy about Blood and Circuses' premiere?"
Julia jumped, and then fixed him with a half-hearted glare. "Hello to you, too," she mumbled, and then she shook her head. Her stiff posture and hard eyes betrayed her irritation, but as she looked at him, she relaxed visibly. "There's no controversy. The premiere went very well- the reviews are phenomenal, just as expected. There was a little spat between Terrance Meyers and Allen Clegg after I left… but that's nothing new." Amusement tugged at Julia's lips and her eyes sparkled as she spoke of the two men. William was very distracted by this, but he managed to form a sentence with effort.
"Terrance Meyers and Allan Clegg?" he asked, curiously, his eyebrows arched.
"Meyers is the head of Shaftesbury Films. Clegg is the head of another film company, an American one. Both are very successful, very rich, and very disagreeable- they often try to nab projects from each other and can often be caught badmouthing the other to press. Naturally, when they come face-to-face, they rile each other up. Both were at the event two nights ago." Julia shrugged, grimacing. "I made sure to avoid them. I didn't want to be caught in the inevitable blow up. I may have had to declare my loyalties, and I have acted in films for both companies. The situation is extremely awkward."
"I can imagine," William replied, smiling a little despite himself.
"What's so funny?" Julia asked, her tone perplexed, shooting him a look that was both mystified and searching.
William paused for a moment, struggling to find words to convey his sudden flash of merriment. "It's just… the people you talk about… they seem almost like characters in a novel. They sound almost unreal to me. And, of course, hearing about them reminds me of the contrast between my life and yours."
Julia nodded, rather seriously. "You have no idea how often I wish for a life similar to the one you lead. But then I remember why I put up with all of the crap. Acting is my passion. There's nothing that I would rather be doing."
"You've always aspired to be an actress, then?" William glanced down as she moved the paper aside and folded her hands together.
"Well…" Julia's voice wavered slightly. "I did consider pursuing a medical career. Gore and blood has never bothered me as it does my sister, and I found that science fascinated me. Ruby cut herself on a jagged piece of glass when I was twelve years old. My nanny knew exactly what to do, of course. I watched as she assessed, cleaned, and covered the wound, and I decided that I wanted to be able to do that. I biked over to the library and rented out a pile of books to do with the human body, diseases, and conditions. I became quite the medical know-it-all, actually. I believe I moderately annoyed my family."
William smirked at this. "What changed your mind, then?"
"By twelfth grade, I had it all planned out. I would attend medical school. I was completely certain about that; nothing could deter me from the path I had chosen. And then, I auditioned for the school play. It was a silly little thing, I told my parents, a part-time hobby. Despite these claims, I found myself beginning to adore acting. Instead of pouring through science textbooks, I would pour over plays and practice my lines. I began reading drama textbooks, and I often nagged my father to buy me tickets for whatever play was on in Toronto at the time. Finally, at my request, my father connected me to an acting agency. By the summer after high school, I had landed myself the lead role in a proper Hollywood film. I could scarcely believe it. I knew I would be unable to attend university as well as complete my requirements for the film… and so I was forced to make a choice. With encouragement from Ruby, I chose acting. The film I had chosen to participate in was globally massive. Thanks to its success, jobs began to roll in at a pace I could only just keep up with. Suddenly, I had a career." Julia looked down at her intertwined hands then, not meeting William's intense gaze. "I was just lucky. My father was a wealthy man. He bribed the acting agency into accepting me as a client, without my knowledge. When I discovered this, I was horrified." Her voice trailed off.
"But," William said, vehemently, "Even if your father hadn't bribed the agency, you would have been accepted. Julia, you're one of the best actresses in Hollywood. It was your talent that ensured the success of your first film, and your dedication that brought on further jobs. You may have had some help at the beginning, some nudges, but you built your own career."
"Thank you, William. That's very kind." Finally, Julia lifted her head. She gazed about for a moment in confusion, and then her expression cleared. "I believe we should order. We may be asked to leave if we don't."
At her words, William shot out of his chair, having completely forgotten where they were. "Of-of course," he stammered, caught off guard. "What would you like?"
"Just a coffee, please." Julia replied, half-rising out of her chair. "William, I was simply joking when I claimed that you owed me a coffee. You don't have to-"
"I'd like to," William said, immediately cutting her off. "After all, I do technically owe you a coffee. I don't want to leave my debts unpaid," he added with a cheeky smile.
Her answering smile was dazzling, and he suddenly found it rather hard to breathe. "Um, I'll be right back."
When he returned with the coffees, Julia was perched on her elbows, regarding him with interest as he slid back into his seat. "So, enough about me. What about you? What's your profession?"
William cleared his throat and looked away, awkwardly. "I don't work in the profession I'd like to," he admitted after a lengthy pause. "I'd always had my heart set on becoming an architect or some variation of inventor, thanks to my childhood idol. My father… my father wasn't very supportive, and I thus knew he wouldn't have any money for our education. So for years, I saved and collected. When I graduated high school, I realized I still didn't have enough for tuition. I found myself a job and began to work hard. I figured I would be able to at least pay half upfront, and then work for the rest. But then Susannah graduated."
Julia's eyes were clouded with sympathy. "Susannah is your younger sister?" she asked quietly, leaning forward as if to reach for his hand, and then deciding against it.
William nodded once. "She wished to become a teacher. I knew she would make a wonderful one. I wanted to go to university myself- badly. But I was her older brother. I had always looked out for her, and I wasn't about to stop then. I gave her the money, though she didn't like it. I continued working at my job, regardless of my distaste for it. She's almost finished school now." William couldn't suppress a sigh of frustration as he looked at Julia. Surely by now, she'd be finding him dull and uninteresting, and would be making some excuse as to leave. Her expression surprised him; she seemed in equal measures considerate and engrossed.
"What of your family?" she wondered aloud.
"My mother died when I was young. My father wasn't there for Susannah and I." William's voice was unintentionally curt. He didn't much like talking about his family and his desolate childhood, and Julia seemed to pick up on this- she didn't press him further. He quickly found that she wasn't overly eager to share about her family life, either; all he discovered was that her mother had died long ago, and that she had a strained relationship with her father that was somewhat on the mend.
From there, the conversation swelled and flowed effortlessly. William didn't seem to notice the passing of time as they spoke, sharing information and ideas and memories. Julia had a quirky aura about her, and never failed to make William smile or even laugh, both of which he didn't often do. Her humor came in the form of endearingly terrible jokes and puns, and it surfaced several times as they talked. Julia had far more in common with William than he had ever dared to hope. They exchanged literary preferences and William much impressed Julia when he was able to finish a Shakespeare sonnet she had recited. They discussed science and inventions, all of which Julia was surprisingly knowledgeable about ("I have a lot of time to read on set," she said, with a shrug). They even touched upon the bizarre phone call that William had received from Julia (upon hearing that it had been him who had been at the end of her verbal abuse, Julia had gone a vivid shade of red). William appreciated her intelligence, her obvious compassion, her boldness, the air of independence she carried with her. He thoroughly enjoyed speaking to her, and never once felt bored or restless. The conversation only became uncomfortable when William resolved to ask Julia about religion. He was Catholic, after all, and his faith was a large part of who he was. He had hoped, of course, that she would share his religion, but this seemed to be increasingly unlikely the more he got to know her. Still, he decided, he had to find out. "Julia," William began, diffidently. "May I ask… do you have a particular faith?"
Julia shook her head. "No. Theoretically, I'm Christian, as my family is… but I do not attend church or practice the religion."
William assessed this statement, still cautious. "Are you an Atheist, then?"
"In a way, I suppose," Julia spoke thoughtfully, frowning, "But not completely. I'm more of an Agnostic. Do you have a particular faith?"
"I am Catholic," William responded without delay. "My beliefs and ideals mean a lot to me. I do try to accept things like homosexuality, though I readily admit it is hard for me."
At this point, Julia's ever-present smile became rather strained. She assured William that she had no problem with Catholics and that she respected his beliefs. He believed this, though it was obvious that something was disconcerting her. Her beam became more natural as they moved on to another topic.
William would have happily stayed with Julia for at least several more hours, but Julia groaned and checked the watch upon her wrist. "Again," she said, pulling a regretful face, "I must run. My infuriating agent set up a meeting with a possible employer, and it begins in roughly thirty minutes. I'd better get home and change. My life, as you can see, is very busy." She stood, and William followed suit.
"Don't worry. I have to go now, anyways. I have a… work thing," he lied, as to put her at ease.
Julia gave him a look as to show that she wasn't fooled, and then pulled a ballpoint pen from her handbag. She scribbled a number onto a napkin and then pressed it into William's hands. "Call me," she said with a sly grin. "I promise, I won't shout abuse into the phone."
"I'll hold you to that," William told her. He didn't quite know what to do afterward, and Julia rolled her eyes. "Honestly," she muttered to herself, and she took a step forward.
When she kissed him, he felt as if his brain was melting right through his body. She pulled back, a mischievous look dancing in her eyes, and Julia Ogden dashed away.
William sat down heavily, still clutching the napkin, his heart attempting to burst its way through his ribcage. Sinister thoughts still threaded their way through his brain, mumbling: Worth it? over and over again. Now, still reeling from her kiss, William was able to forestall these thoughts. Worth it.