Reader: Switch from being Dave Strider. Become the short, grumpy boy.

Oh, fuck you! You're not that short. Okay, you're relatively short, but 5'6" isn't a terrible height! Wait a minute, who are you kidding? You hate your height. But then again, you hate a lot of things and your height just happens to be one of them. Your name is Karkat Vantas and you are currently leaving a train station to go on holiday. You are currently attending Oxford University as a First Year, and are planning to become a surgeon. You have made it a life goal to find a cure for lung cancer and you are currently studying medicine. You have always been a difficult person with a bit of a temper. This made you an excellent student. Well, not the fact that you have a bad temper, but the fact that not many people wanted to socialize with you because of that bad temper. You are also quite intelligent and are more than willing to admit that you are smarter than the majority of human beings around you. The plain fact is, people have always bothered you. This fact, along with your temper, has gotten you into trouble over the years.

You were born in London, but you didn't always live there. When you were 14, your parents moved to San Francisco (the place where you learned to really hate people). Many things happened there, and many of those things you would rather not think about. Can you please move on for the love of God?! Yes, of course you can. These are your thoughts after all.

"Where do you thuppothe Moor 36 ith?" Sollux asked you, turning on his heel.

"How would I fucking know?" You glared at him. "I've never been to this bloody shithole of a place in my entire miserable excuse for a life!"

"Oh, do settle down, KK." He smiled.

"And try to tone down the vulgar language," Eridan said, his Italian accent slurring his words in that obnoxious way.

"Fuck you. I'll do what I want." You mumbled, dragging your suitcase behind you.

Reader: Please explain who these other people are.

You actually don't know either of these men very well, considering you only just met them. You all happened to be on the same train and in the same car, and you all happened to be going to the same location. You were really looking forward to having a slightly silent holiday, but from the looks of it, you wouldn't be.

Sollux was a bit taller than you, with blond hair and multi-colored eyes. He also wore lamely ironic 3D specs, the kind they used to have at the cinema but don't anymore. He was originally from Liverpool himself, but now lived in the countryside and raised bees. He was thin and had an obnoxious lisp. He also seemed to have every technological gadget ever invented. Along the ride to Liverpool, he pulled tons of the gadgets out, making you roll your eyes. He seemed relatively poor though, and it was almost as if the tools were all homemade. You hated to admit it, but they bloke was intelligent. Perhaps even more intelligent than you. However, you are naturally superior than everyone else, and so it really bothered you to know that someone might be at your level and perhaps even more so. He also liked to give people nicknames, calling you "KK" and Eridan "ED". It was obvious he loved to push the buttons of other people, and was constantly trying to get you to yell. You could only describe him as a prick, really.

Eridan was extremely tall and wore stupid "hipster" specs, as he called them, and had hair that could only scream Adam Lambert. It also had a purple stripe in the middle of it, and wore a leather jacked and skinny jeans which could have split anorexics in half. He had dark amethyst eyes, which are really a rarity (You would know. You study these things) and his hair was black. He also had olive skin and thick eyebrows which were plucked to perfection. He was astonishingly wealthy and owned probably about half of Italy. He came from Verona, and owned a mansion there. You wouldn't be surprised if he were directly related to the character of Paris from William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, whereas Sollux was more of Benadick from Much Ado About Nothing. One obnoxiously unaware of the feelings of others and self-obsessed, the other too focused on showing himself off. You smiled, knowing Shakespeare could relate to anyone. You were secretly an enormous fan of his works, the romances were just too perfect.

Anyway, both were incredibly annoying, and they seemed to bother one another as well. However, you know you're all about to spend a week with one another, so you've been trying to be civil. Sollux and Eridan seem to hate each other a lot more than they hate you, however. You hate them both equally, because you hate them to the point where you hate that they breathe. Annoying people deserve to die. You've explained them. Can you please get back to reality yet?

Yes, of course! Reader: Get back to reality.

"I'm abtholutely thtarved!" Sollux said, turning to you, "Would you like to go to that pub, KK?" He asked, pointing in the direction of a probably sweaty, smelly, disgusting pub.

"That place looks so blindingly revolting, that I think I would rather drink horse piss mixed with a combination of lead filled paint and cat semen." You growled, looking up at him with tired eyes.

"I'm sorry, Sol. I'm gonna agree with Kar on this one," Eridan slurred with his heavy accent. "I love England but the food is just terrible. You'll both come to Italy, yes? Then maybe we can make your stomachs worthy of existing!"

"Maybe you should go to Oxford sometime. We'll attempt experiments on your brain until it's worthy of existing." You sighed, "But some things just aren't possible."

Eridan, being the annoying prat he is, huffed and crossed his arms in a pout. Your frown gets deeper and you look over at Sollux who is smirking at the pouting royalty. How fucking typical of both of them. They seemed to have practically jumped out of a horribly written television show, almost, with their stupid personalities. Ugh, you hate people.

You end up getting food at a small seafood stand. You hate seafood, especially crab. Your father was a seaman once, and he caught a lot of crab. That's all you ever ate. Crab for breakfast, lunch and dinner...But Sollux and Eridan did not know that about you and they had no way of guessing that about you, so you had to give them the benefit of the doubt for wanting to eat it. You ended up stomaching some shrimp, but you refused to eat anything more than that. You were sure you would be able to make it to the island.

Evidently Eridan knew a lot about fish. You almost felt like you were watching Forrest Gump, having to hear about every single bloody type of shrimp there was in the world. He was fascinated with it though, and you found that he also had an insane love for swimming and anything water-related. How exciting. He evidently wanted to sail the Pacific Ocean, which you think is a pathetic dream to have. Why would you want to do something so simple as sailing when you have the type of money to do anything? Here you were, dirt poor, and trying to get by at the best University you could find. He could get anything he wanted at the snap of his fingers. He even was pretty attractive, you had to admit. You've never even had sex before. What made him so much better than you?

That's right. Everyone is better than you, you sighed. But that train of thought is going to get you nowhere. Especially when you've already arrived at the Moor.

A few other people were standing there by the time you got there. You looked them up and down. There was a prim looking woman with a black pencil skirt and a mauve blouse, who looked very proper. She was standing with a young, peppy girl who looked like she was just fucking high and about to shit herself. She had stupid hippie clothing and dumb specs. Then there was a douchebag, to put it plainly, with white hair and dumb sunglasses. Then there was a strange blind girl with red specs. But what really caught your eye was a small boy who was conversing with another very tall girl.

Your eyes widened as he caught your breath. He was the same height as you were, with messy black hair. And his eyes were bluer than the sky on a sunny day.

You know this boy has changed your life somehow in the past, but you have no idea who he is or why you recognize him.

I'm so sorry! We're about done with introducing the characters! Only about four more chapters of that, because I'm planning on introducing Nepeta and Equius a bit differently! I should be done with all these boring intros by the end of this weekend though!

Please review and read!

Hemlockforensics