Dan VS The Scientist Chapter 3
I do not own Dan VS, They belong to the Hub.
I do own the villain Dan is facing.
Chapter 3: A conference of deviant minds.
Dan dragged Tyra up the stairs, after he went back to Chris' house to get Mr. Mumbles. He walked over the pieces of his shattered door. He placed Mr. Mumbles and Brad's robotic remains on the counter, and walked into his bedroom. He returned with a straight jacket and put it on Tyra who struggled in it. Dan saw this was very tiring and decided to go a different approach in getting the straight jacket on. Dan looked around and found an old sandwich on the floor. He picked it up and waved it in front of Tyra's face. She sniffed at the sandwich and held her nose from the stink. Dan sniffed the sandwich and groaned from the smell as well. Dan threw the sandwich in the trash. Dan looked around for something to distract her. He stepped forward and a small squeak was heard. He looked down to see he stepped on a squeaky toy mouse. Tyra bent down looking at the squeaky toy Dan stepped on. Dan grinned and used this small opportunity to put the straight jacket on her. Tyra fell face first on the squeaky toy, which made her bite down on it. Dan placed Tyra in front of his small TV and turned it on.
"Watch every second of it, including the commercials." Dan commanded as he walked over to the door hole. "Ok, one problem down, one to go." Dan pushed the bookshelf which was next to the door over into the doorway's path. "There we go, one makeshift doorway blocker. Now, time for bed." Dan picked up Mr. Mumbles on the way to the bedroom. He put it on the bed as he started to open his nightstand drawer. Upon opening the drawer, he saw a box of earplugs. He reached into the drawer and grabbed the box. He pulled out two pairs of ear plugs, and put one of the pairs in his feline pet's ears. Dan put the other pair in his own ears and started to take off his pants to show striped boxers. He laid down on his bed as Mr. Mumbles moved over and jumped onto his chest softly. He pulled up the covers over both of them and smiled. "Goodnight Mr. Mumbles." Dan smiled as Mr. Mumbles mewed gently.
Chris and Elise's home...
Chris was holding Brad's head underneath his arm, letting out a small yawn. He fumbled with his keys opening the door. He saw Elise was watching TV on the couch. When she looked up, she saw Chris holding a disembodied head underneath his arm. She panicked and ran over to him quickly.
"Oh my god, what happened," Elise asked seeing the disembodied head.
"Calm down. Dan and I apparently ran into Chad's brother, Brad, who wanted revenge on Dan and me." Chris explained.
"What is this, a soap opera?" Elise joked.
"Dan wants you to decode the robot's memories, to find out who programmed it." Chris handed her the head of Brad-bot.
"It looks like an android C2X9 version 10 of its series," Elise explained, "Meaning there should be a USB port right here." She opened Brad's nose, which revealed a USB.
"Ok, you got that covered. I'm going to bed. By the way, remind to get the car fixed; we just had our windshields broken."
Chris walked into the bed room and plopped down on the bed, making a loud thud. Elise walked out of their house and into their shed, placing the head on the workbench. She opened the drawer of the work bench and pulled out a laptop. She placed the laptop on top of the workbench and opened it up. She placed one end of a cord into her laptop's USB port and the other into the head's USB port. She began to decode the robot's eternal memory, which took about 30 minutes. She found certain files on Tyra, and a place to a warehouse in the middle of the desert in New Mexico. She also found the android's mission file which was: Apprehend Test Subject #2025181, and eliminate Dan Mandel. She was not surprised when she saw the eliminate Dan, though she started to wonder about Tyra's files. She was about to view them when her laptop started to shoot sparks out of it, causing it to short out.
"There goes another 500 dollars of software down the drain." Elise sighed looking at the burned laptop. She decided to worry about the Eliminate Dan thing in the morning.
Dan's apartment...
Dan woke up with a yawn, which made Mr. Mumbles look up smiling. She let out a small meow as her master picked her up in his arms.
"Let's go see what Tyra's learned." Dan started to walk out of his bedroom, bringing a baseball bat with him. When he walked in he saw Tyra with her legs cross and hunched over enticed by the TV, her straight jacket in tatters. "So, Tyr-"
"Shh." Tyra shushed Dan as she continued to watch the TV.
"Did you just shush me?" Dan asked getting a shush in response.
"Shush! This is the final season episode of Population Control Johnny, where we find out who took his extra bullets." Tyra explained, putting her hand on his mouth.
"What?! With no preempting?" Dan asked seeing the episode. He sat down near Tyra and watched the episode with her. After 30 minutes of bullets and mayhem, Tyra nudged Dan a little.
"Ok so what do you want Dan?" Tyra asked.
"I want to know why you broke my door down and tried to choke me." Dan asked.
"Reasons why I did that: 1. You're the only person I know who treated me like a person, plus I didn't know if the door was locked or unlocked. 2. You hit me in the head with a bat!" Tyra shouted in Dan's face.
"Don't play the blame game with me. I'm the victim, from not only you trying to choke me, but from your huge dino-butt squashing my car!" Dan shouted back at Tyra.
"So are you calling me fat? By the way I got your invoice, jerk." Tyra replied, making Dan more angry.
"You were fat in your dino-form!" Dan shouted, which made Tyra angrier.
"At least I'm not a plus size midget." Tyra growled at Dan. As Dan was about to throw the first punch, the bookshelf that was blocking the door was kicked to the other side of the room. Standing in the doorway was Dr. Samuel, standing next to him was a small cybernetic dog. Tyra whimpered and hid behind Dan.
"Ah, Dan we meet at last." Dr. Samuel stated sounding dramatic.
"Do I know you?" Dan asked as he glared at the person wearing the lab coat.
"Oh, right we never met. I'm Dr. James Birch Samuel." Dr. Samuel greeted the little man. "I was the one who sent the android or 'Brad-bot' as you called it after you, and I also created Tyra right here." Dr. Samuel gestured toward the hiding dino-girl.
When Dr. Samuel said that sentence Dan's face turned crimson red with anger. He was basically boiling at his tipping point. Not only did he send a killer robot after him, he also had the nerve to turn an innocent out-of-place dinosaur into a human.
"You wrecked my car, and turned a once beautiful creature of nature into an equally beautiful woman." Dan exclaimed, making Tyra smile a bit.
"You think I'm beautiful?" Tyra asked.
"Shut up!" Dan shouted at the dino-girl.
"Look, I just want to have a little chat. I can tell you're a busy man with your own goals." Dr. Samuel replied to Dan, which made Dan's anger subside for a few seconds.
"True, I do have a lot on my plate today." Dan pulled out a small day planner and flipped through the pages. Each page had the words 'Get Revenge,' and a person or places' name. On Friday, Dan had written 'Get Revenge on Bob's Burgers for feeding me a burger with cheese'. "You got four minutes to explain why I shouldn't call the police." Dan asked.
"Ok. Do you have anywhere to sit?" Dr. Samuel asked. Dan pointed to the couch as he sat down in his own big chair. Dr. Samuel sat down on the couch as his cyber dog sat down on his lap. Tyra hid behind the big chair Dan was sitting in.
"Now, explain yourself."
"First, Dan, I never meant for my experiment to get out of the lab. You know how sometimes your plans go awry." Dr. Samuel stated.
"I do." Dan nodded, as he remembered some of his revenge schemes always go awry.
"Second, I didn't know you knew Tyra, which would explain why she's here." Dr. Samuel assessed the situation. "And as for my android crushing your car I do apologize for it doing so."
"Apologies won't fix my car!" Dan shouted.
"I know." Dr. Samuel pulled out a big wad of cash. "How much do you want for Tyra and for your car fixed?"
"The car fixing is 20,000 dollars. Tyra however, you'll have to make it worth my while." Dan suggested, smiling deviously. Dr. Samuel first handed Dan the money for his car to be fixed.
"What would it take for you to give me back Tyra?" Dr. Samuel asked.
"Nothing, because you can't have her."
"WHAT?!" Dr. Samuel stood up right, which made the cyber dog fall on the floor.
"Because, obviously she escaped from your horror movie experiments, and I'm still not happy about your robot destroying my car." Dan replied.
"You are making a powerful enemy. Reconsider the deal." Dr. Samuel shouted.
"The only thing I should reconsider, is letting you live." Dan stated as he grabbed a golf club and bashed it over Dr. Samuel's skull. Dr. Samuel didn't flinch from the attack; in fact he started to laugh.
"Did you honestly think I was here?" Dr. Samuel asked as he broke the golf club in two. "This is an android I'm controlling remotely from my lair."
The cyber dog stood up on its hind legs, and made its paws turn into buzz-saw blades. Its legs and arms extended making it taller and longer.
"And my assistant is controlling the cyber dog." Dr. Samuel said monotonously.
"This is ridiculous. How come you get the android that actually looks like you and I get an R.L. Stine sci-fi reject?" the cyber dog asked in a female's voice.
"Because there wasn't enough fake skin for another android." Dr. Samuel argued. "Now destroy Dan Mandel. I'll apprehend Tyra."
The cyber dog thrust its buzz-saw blade at the short man, only he was quick enough to dodge it. Dan put his hands through the garbage on his floor and pulled out a hatchet. He hacked off the cyber dog's legs, which made the cyber dog's blade arms flail about. The blades hit her master's chest, which opened to show a bunch of broken wires and circuit boards from the buzz saw attack.
"You incompetent buffoon!" Dr. Samuel shouted in rage.
"Hey, Sammy-boy," Dan grinned and smashed his hatchet into Dr. Samuel's chest. "Don't mess with a being of nemesis!"
"Looks like he shouldn't have axed for me." Tyra stated making Dan groan. The Cyber Dog was still moving it arms which still had buzz-blades. Dan ended the cyber dog's life by cutting it's head off. "Looks like your a hea-" Dan put a hand on Tyra's mouth.
"If you say another awful pun, I'll bury the hatchet in your skull." Dan threatened, making Tyra silent. Dan pulled out his phone, and called the only person who he knew could help him now.
"Hello?" Chris' voice rang over the other lane.
"I was attacked by two robots!" Dan shouted into the phone.
"Who is this?" Chris asked, which made Dan even more angry.
"Get over here, and take me to your house. I need to see if Elise decoded that robot." Dan commanded, which made Chris sigh over the other end.
"I'll be there in a few minutes." Chris replied hanging up the other end. Dan put his phone back in his pocket and looked at Tyra.
"Now, since you're my ticket to revenge for getting back at the scientist, you're going to need some clothes." Dan stated as he looked through his closet for something for her to wear.
Back at the underground laboratory...
Dr. Samuel growled as his screen said 'Not responding to android up-link'. He had not only lost the chance to get rid of a nuisance in his plans, but he had lost 20,000 dollars. Dr. Samuel pinched the bridge of his nose trying to regain his composure. He looked to the side to see Alisa who was chuckling nervously.
"This Dan guy is a pain in my backside!" Dr. Samuel groaned as he stood up.
"Sir, as far as I can tell this Dan Mandel person doesn't seem to have high tech weaponry or any supercomputer's." Alisa stated.
"That's what he wants you to think! That he's an average Joe, but it's all a ploy!" Dr. Samuel exclaimed. "I need a way to find out his weaknesses. Maybe if I look under the name of his assistant I'll find something."
Dr. Samuel typed in Chris' name and came up with five mugshots and a wedding registry. He saw Elise's picture next to his and clicked on it. He soon came up with an agency file with Elise's code name under it, which was Dancing Shadow. Dr. Samuel growled as he brought his hands down hard on the keyboard. Not only was this Dan fellow a possible scientist, but now he knew someone in the international spy business.
"I swear if it takes me an eternity I'll make sure this Dan fellow and his friends never see the light of day!" Dr. Samuel growled.
Back at Dan's place...
Chris drove up to see Dan standing next to Tyra. She was in a white T-shirt which was covered by the same blue vest Dan had gotten from a previous revenge scheme. She was also in blue jeans and in a pair of Chris' sandals. Dan immediately shoved Tyra in the back seat of the car before getting into the passenger seat.
"Drive, I need to see if that Brad head revealed its contents." Dan commanded, which made Chris drive back to his house. As Chris drove, Tyra watched the world pass by through the window. They soon reached their destination after a few minutes. Dan, Chris sand Tyra got out of the car and walked to the doorstep. Chris pulled out his keys and opened the door, to reveal Elise, who was trying to fix her laptop.
"Hey honey." Chris greeted his wife, much to Dan's dismay.
"Oh come on, stop sweet talking your wife. We need to know what was on the dismembered head of Brad." Dan stated, which made Chris sigh.
"Well Dan, I have good news and bad news." Elise stated. "Do you want the bad news first or the good news?"
"Hmm, bad first then good." Dan replied.
"The bad news is that android was sent after Tyra and if you stood in its way it would kill you." Elise bluntly replied.
"Wait what?!" Dan shouted, "Then what the hell is the good news?"
"The good news is, I was able to get a bit of information out of the head." Elise finished.
"Then let me have it." Dan asked annoyed.
"Unfortunately, the info fried my computer. It's going to take me a while to fix it so we can look at the information." Elise explained.
"Great, so we have to wait for your computer to spring to life from the dead?" Dan asked.
"That's one way of putting it." Elise replied, as she was unfazed by his choice of words.
"Fine! Watch Tyra. We're going to get revenge on that awful restaurant that tried to kill me." Dan started to walk out the door followed by Chris.
"Don't do anything illegal!" Elise shouted to the two leaving men.
"No promises!" Dan shouted back, which made Elise sigh as they left. Elise grabbed the remote next to her and turn on the TV to Channel Five News.
"Why are you watching this?" Tyra asked.
"When Dan and Chris leave the house I watch the news to see if their 'mission of vengeance' goes awry." Elise explained.
"Does that happen a lot?" Tyra asked.
"You have no idea." Elise replied dryly. It was going to be a long day.
If you guys are wondering, I'm basically putting some revenge schemes in the background so it can be livened up a little. Also if I made Dan too out of character, please tell me. Anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and if you stuck around for the author's notes at the end you are a Trooper. Also if your a fan of Bob's Burgers, then I apologize for making Dan get revenge on him.
~Ghostdog 2.5