With Rose gone Alec was left alone, still in his vest top and jogging trousers. He'd been happy that morning, Rose teasing him and making her breakfast even though she'd cheated. Who could blame her? They had all but had sex last night at her place and this morning right there in the kitchen they had just managed to stop themselves in time and she'd let him stay with her last night. Goodness knows what would have happened if they'd been on the sofa earlier. Then his world had come crashing down on him, old memories and dreams had come flooding back and Rose was to blame. He'd asked for the whole truth and that's exactly what he had got, whether he'd liked it or not. There was no going back now. He had to figure out exactly just how much he cared for Rose or if that was the end before it had really got started.
Just a few hours ago they had been so close; he could still taste her kisses as he remembered the touch of her bare skin, her touching his chest, wanting so badly to take her. It had been more than he could stand, he had so wanted her last night and this morning. The question was did he still want her? Did he still have the same feelings? What had changed, she was still Rose Tyler, the most beautiful woman he had ever met that had actually felt the same about him. He went to get changed properly and was still cross he didn't have internet access, he'd have to think about getting it somehow then he remembered that Rose had connected to her home network and checked it was still on. It was so he used the details she'd scribbled on a notepad and went through things again, at least the parts he was allowed, she'd wiped access to the main database.
He had to decide before it was too late if any of this really mattered to the fact he was smitten with one Rose Tyler, time traveller, woman from another universe who had travelled in the blue box from his childhood dreams. Was it a sign? A sign that they were meant to find each other despite being from two different universes? He would have to think long and hard before making any life changing decisions because if he was going to become romantically involved with Rose then his life was going to change more than he'd ever imagined.
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Rose was in tears when she got home. In the few yards it had taken her to reach her door she could feel the tears on her face and as she sat on the sofa, the very place where last night they had been so relaxed, so sensual, Alec's touch on her bare skin as he'd boldly lifted her top then them almost having sex on the sofa and the chair in Alec's kitchen and she burst out her tears at the thought of his kisses and letting him stay with her last night as they'd fallen asleep with each other. He'd not even tried to do any more and then just the same this morning. The first time she had ever really wanted someone since her thoughts about the Doctor and now she had made him turn against her.
She could finally have had the chance to move on with someone, someone who could grow old at the same rate as her, someone who could spend his life with her and she with him and for the first time she realized this man, Alec Hardy was not the Doctor and that she hadn't really noticed that she'd stopped regarding him as such. He was not a substitute, she was falling in love with him, a love she'd never felt before even for the Doctor. She wasn't being disloyal to him because she'd left it too late to disclose her feelings and although she knew the answer she'd not actually heard his words as he faded away back into his universe.
She had felt herself wanting Alec Hardy a lot sooner than she had ever done with anyone else, she had never really had a lover before, only boyfriends and she had been so young then, not really knowing the meaning of love until she'd met Alec because he was obtainable and she finally realised that was what she wanted, not the ghostly remembrance of those few minutes on a beach in Norway. Now she had lost both and a chance of being happy. Maybe she should just give in, move back to London and give Alec a chance to get on with his life without ever seeing her again but he'd asked her to be patient, to give him time and he was not saying it was over. She should be fair and give him some space, let him think things over.
She would stay and if she had not heard from him by the following Sunday she would ask Pete to get someone to take over and go back home. That was her final decision, no more dwelling on it. One week to make or break their new relationship and if it was break, if Alec came and told her it was over or completely ignored her then she'd go, have the decency to respect he couldn't accept her and what came with it. She had warned him and he'd wanted the truth, she had to live with it, with or without him and end up broken hearted again.
Rose went to work the following morning, being grateful she didn't leave and get home as the same time Alec did. It was an uneventful week for Rose, every time she heard the doorbell go she would look up expecting Alec to be standing there calling her Miss Tyler again but it wasn't to be. She spent every night watching from the window as she saw Alec come home and even at that distance she could see he was hurting, the way he avoided showing his face. She would think about giving him more access to the Torchwood database but thought it better not to, she'd done enough damage already, she couldn't do any more to make him hate her if she tried. She tried to sleep but drifted to feeling Alec on her, touching her in all the right places, kissing her gently and caressing her. She would fall asleep eventually and wake up, her eyes still sore from crying. It was like losing the Doctor all over again, why did she keep doing this to herself? Why was she falling for a man who was his double when she was surely due some happiness with someone else but not with someone who looked like him?
Friday afternoon soon arrived and there was only one more work day remaining, Saturday. If she hadn't heard from him by then she was going to pack her things and go home on Sunday and have someone pick up the rest her things. It wasn't fair she'd asked him to accept everything at once, she should just leave and let him get on with his life. She didn't want to worry her mother, have her coming down and smothering her or urging her to leave right away, saying "I thought you were over that alien?" after she'd admitted to her he looked like the Doctor, which she'd begged Jake and Pete not to tell her Alec looked like him.
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The same could be said for Alec except for one thing and it was called Ellie. He'd told her he was going on a date with Rose and he'd not gone round to her house for two Sunday afternoons, first saying he had 'plans' and making up some lame excuse which she saw through as she'd seen the two of them going out in Rose's car. She had seen them last Sunday morning meet outside Rose's house, seen them running back to the gate across the field and Rose's sudden spurt to what apparently seemed like a race between them and she'd even smiled, thinking Alec and Rose looked happy together as Rose jumped up and down, obviously being the winner. She had even seen Rose follow Alec to his house and not re-appear for a few hours. She'd thought things must be going well for the two of them and she was pleased Alec had found someone, even if she was blonde and looked ten years his junior. She had asked him how his dates had gone and mentioned she had seen them together on Sunday. Alec got cross with her, told her to leave it and that he didn't want to talk about it. Ellie was persistent if nothing else, not one to let things just go easily. She prodded Alec every opportunity she got and he would snap back at her, telling her she was like a dog who wouldn't let go of a bone, she would called him a miserable git and that he'd been better since he met Rose.
The office was back to calling him DI Grumpy again because he snapped at everyone, he was making everyone suffer because he was suffering inside, his mind in turmoil. They were all taking bets his girlfriend had kicked him out. He had sneaked home every night, hoping he wouldn't see her, sat in the darkness pouring again and again over the limited access he had to the Torchwood database, seeing if he could get anything new out of it, if Rose had allowed more information than before in an effort by her to help him understand more. She hadn't of course, he'd asked her to wait and it seemed she was respecting that. He lay awake at night, remembering those very close times they'd had together, still seeing her lying there on her sofa and in her bed, never touching her as they fell asleep, how beautiful she was, wanting to take her there and then but taking all his self-will to stop himself. Going back to being a misery and making everyone suffer especially Ellie who'd tried to take his mind off the subject after he'd insisted that she leave it alone, not entirely successfully.
By Friday afternoon, Ellie had had enough and decided to grab the bull by its horns, the bull being Alec Hardy and it wasn't going to be easy. She might even get suspended for insubordination but she didn't care, she couldn't stand it any more, seeing him like that. She could tell he was in turmoil but she knew he was in love with Rose by the way she had seen them together and the way he responded when she'd tried to talk to him about it. If he didn't care then he wouldn't be so grumpy, he would have gone to see Rose and told her it was over because that was the way Alec Hardy operated straight to the point and no messing. This was totally out of character for him and she was having no more of his moodiness.
Ellie broke the silence which you could have cut with a knife. "Go see her."
"What?"
"Go see her you idiot."
"I could you suspended for that," came the reply.
"If it means you go see her, I don't care, I'm not putting up with your moods any more Sir, you're being a grump."
"Mind your own business Miller."
"Misery guts."
"Leave now or I'll have you removed from the Station."
Ellie stood her ground. "Not until you go see her."
"It's nothing to do with you, it's complicated."
"What's so complicated if you love her?"
"What?"
"Are you blind Sir?" Ellie only used the "Sir" bit when she was cross, in company or being sarcastic and they weren't in company. "Even my two year old could see you're in love with her so go tell her."
"It's not that easy. I told you, it's complicated, now drop it."
"No, not until you tell me what's stopping you."
"I can't, it's " his voice trailed off.
Ellie crossed her arms and said "I'm waiting. Spill the beans."
Alec looked up from a speck of dust he'd see on his desk, well it looked like a speck of dust or was it something in his eye? "What if you were told something about someone and you were sworn to secrecy about it because it was so far fetched that you'd get locked up in a padded cell if you told another living soul?"
Ellie looked at him, waiting for him to continue.
"But then, the person that something was about had positive proof that it was all true but you still didn't want to believe it."
"Are you being serious Alec? What the hell are you talking about? Do you realise how ridiculous it sounds?"
"Always asking questions, Miller and I'm deadly serious. I was told something about Rose from her and she had concrete evidence it was all true but to anyone else, it would be so far fetched, you would sending for the men in white coats."
Ellie stared at him, then she laughed. "Oh, is that all, thought it was more serious, I'll send for the padded wagon then."
"Ellie, I'm being deadly serious and I don't know what to do about it. Whether to walk away or not."
"Then go tell her you love her and accept it, at least you'd get carted off together," she replied.
"Yes, that's a big help. I'm so glad I asked your opinion, that's a load off my mind."
"Sarcasm isn't your best trait Alec."
He looked up from where he had been staring at some papers on his desk. " I've not even started yet."
He got up, started pacing the room and kicked the chair.
"Better?" Ellie asked.
He sat down again. No he wasn't feeling better, not by a long way. She wasn't going to let this rest until he did something about it and he knew it. He sat down again and pretended to look at the computer screen, hoping Ellie would go away. She didn't, she just glared at him. She took a piece of paper and scribbled a note on it, 'Go see her you idiot' folded it, wrote 'DI Grumpy' on the top part and put it on his desk then left his office.
He didn't know that Ellie had been to introduce herself to Rose the previous night and telling her that Alec was behaving like a love sick puppy. There had been a knock at Rose's door and a woman was standing there who introduced herself saying she was Alec's DS and so Rose had invited her in. They talked for a while, Rose offering her tea and Ellie told her how much better the Inspector had been the last few weeks, even coming out of his shell he'd been hibernating in for so long and that he'd talked about her all the time. Ellie said she knew he still cared about her, she knew something was wrong but couldn't get any sense out of him. Rose thanked her for letting her know but there was very little she could do about it. She had promised to give him time. Ellie left after saying if they didn't smarten up she was going to have to poke her nose in where it wasn't wanted.
Alec suddenly noticed it was almost home time then saw the note folded up just out of his reach and saw the large writing on it - DI Grumpy, he didn't need to open it, he knew what it said. Ellie had already left to pick up the kids, what was the point in going home? Living next door to Rose was just a reminder. Maybe she wouldn't give him time and just go back to London, thinking he'd abandoned her. She would be home by now, she would see him come home, watching from the window again as he'd seen her every night that week, pretending he'd not noticed. Her heart must be breaking by now, his was. She had trusted him enough to tell him everything and probably got into trouble with Torchwood for doing so. Would she still be there when he got home or decided he wasn't worth the heartbreak? She had obviously had her heart broken before, when she'd lost the man he resembled and she'd trusted him, grumpy Alec Hardy with her already broken heart and he'd shunned her, shut her out, putting his feelings before hers.
He silently hoped she would still be there when he got home, he should go say something, maybe the wrong thing but anything to break the unbearable silence of the past week. Maybe he should just let her go, let her get back to some sort of life she'd had, he still didn't know how he felt and it wasn't fair on either of them. What could he say to her that would make either of them feel any better? He still didn't know what he felt, how was he supposed to assure her that it was better they parted? He put on his jacket and left for the weekend. He got a lift home and when the car turned into his street, Rose's car wasn't there. His heart sank, she had gone. Surely not. How could he have been so stupid? Rose had real evidence she had been telling the truth and he'd ignored it. Ignored what his heart was telling him, the detective side of him winning, suspicion, doubt, fear of the unknown all taking over and he'd lost her for good.
She must have been so upset she had gone to seek comfort with her parents. There was no "To Let" sign outside her house but maybe they'd not had time or maybe Rose had to send for her stuff. He went inside his house, devastated. He should have told her, at the very least sent her a text asking if she was OK. Ellie had been right, he did love her and he was being pig-headed as usual. He had stuffed it up again, his one chance to have something good in his life after all he had been through and he'd blown it. He'd not been in love for such a long time and it showed. Hardy, you're a complete ass, he chastised himself, you can't get anything right. He half-heartedly started to make himself something to eat, he had to eat, he realised starving himself wouldn't do any good. He wandered into his living room and sat down at the table, he usually ate in the kitchen but it had reminded him too much of breakfast with Rose, them clearing up together and being intimate again to the point of almost losing it right there on the kitchen chair.
Sat at the table in the window, he was wallowing in his sorrow when suddenly, Rose's car pulled up into her driveway, he dropped his knife and fork and before she could even get out of the car, Alec was on his feet and out the front door, his dinner forgotten on the table and grabbing his phone and keys on the way out and walked up behind Rose's car as she switched the engine off. Ellie's little intervention had done some good after all.