Warnings: mentions of attempted suicide, mentions of drug abuse
"How can we be clones?"
Sarah sits on the couch in the basement room facing two women who wear faces identical to her own. There's a steaming cup of tea in her hands, courtesy of Alison. The mug rests against her jean clad legs and the warmth seeps through the fabric until it almost burns, but Sarah doesn't move. She finds that she needs something, anything, to ground her, and the slight pain that is radiating through the thin fabric of her pants will have to do for now.
"We're not sure," Cosima says, nursing her own mug of tea and sitting across from Sarah. She stares down into the drink as though all of her answers lay at the bottom. "A few months ago Beth was contacted by a German woman named Katja Obinger. She told some story about how her 'genetic identicals' were being hunted across Europe—"
"Wait. Did you say hunted?" Sarah asks, looking between Cosima and Alison, who is determinedly avoiding her gaze from the other end of the sofa. "What do you mean hunted?"
Cosima sighs, staring down into her tea again. "There were three other clones in Europe that we know of. And according to Katja they were all assassinated. Danielle Fournier, Janika Zingler, and Aryanna Giordano. Katja was able to give their names, but that was about it. We don't know anything else about them and Katja was afraid to give too much information over the phone."
"And where is Katja now?" Sarah asks, dreading the answer.
"She's alive. Or at least, last we heard she was alive," Cosima replies, giving Alison a sideways glance. Alison's body language is screaming that she isn't comfortable with this conversation but Sarah can't find it within herself to care. "She said she wanted to come here to get away from the danger over in Europe, but we haven't heard from her since. She was going to bring us—" She stops abruptly at a sharp look from Alison. Sarah rolls her eyes.
"Look, I know I have an accent and everything, but I'm not your assassin, yeah?" She says impatiently. "Why the bloody hell would one of us want to kill us? If there even is an us." She looks back to Cosima. "What is she bringing?"
"Blood samples," she replies, not missing a beat but also not catching Alison's eye. "She's sick, or at least, that's what she told Beth. She was looking for help and when Beth found me we made a deal that if she brought me blood samples I would try to find her a cure, or at least some answers, while researching who we are."
"So you're some kind of scientist then? How did Beth find you?" Sarah finds that the questions just keep coming and she almost can't decide what to ask first. She doesn't want to believe a word that is coming out of this woman's mouth, but it's hard not to when speaking with two people who look exactly the same as her.
"PHD student. Experimental Evolutionary Developmental Biology," Cosima rattles off and Sarah nods, pretending to know what that is. "When Katja contacted Beth she ran facial recognition software on drivers' licenses here in the U.S. and found us." She gestures between herself and Alison. Cocking her head she says, "We didn't know about you though."
"Yeah, I've been a bit out of the loop," Sarah says evasively, waving her hand in a dismissive way. She notes the look on Cosima's face and hurries on. "Why would Beth want to kill herself? Isn't she a cop?" She tries to remember all that Cosima has told her.
Cosima opens her mouth to reply but Alison cuts her off.
"That is none of your business," she hisses. Her grip on her own mug of tea is intense, knuckles turning white. "We shouldn't be giving her any information," she says, rounding on Cosima. "We don't even know her. Beth wouldn't want—"
"Alison."
The three of them whip around at the sound of a tired voice coming from the doorway. Beth is leaning heavily against the doorframe, looking at Alison with red-rimmed eyes. Alison jumps up and quickly moves towards Beth, who waves her off.
"Monitors," she says quietly as Alison hovers nearby looking as though she desperately wants to do something but doesn't know what. Beth takes a few shaky steps into the room and Cosima gets up from her chair so Beth can sit down. She sinks into the chair, looking exhausted and weary of life. Sarah eyes her, thinking that these other two are going to have to keep a close eye on her because she still looks as though she would try to pull something.
Alison sits down cautiously on the arm of her chair, looking a little nervous that she would be pushed away again. Beth reaches out and takes her hand in her own, letting Alison pull it into her lap and cradle it there. Sarah can see the woman relax just a tiny bit with the contact, but in a moment her eyes find Sarah's and the look in them is intense, even though she looks beaten down. Sarah holds her gaze until she speaks again.
"What are monitors?" she asks, feeling Alison's stare but ignoring it. This overprotective woman can kiss her ass for all she cares. Beth also seems to ignore the tension that is coming off of Alison in waves.
"Exactly what the name suggests," Beth replies. "They monitor us. They watch to make sure we don't run away or do something stupid. They keep us grounded. And they run tests on us."
"Yours sure did do a shit job then," Sarah says. She knows that she is being too blunt, but she has never been one to utilize a brain to mouth filter. Alison lets out an angry sound and even Cosima tenses, but Beth just looks at her as though she is reading her like a book. After a long moment she allows a small, amused smile to slip through and gives Sarah a tiny nod. Sarah smiles back and decides that if Beth doesn't manage to off herself after all the two of them are going to get along just fine.
"What kind of tests do you mean?" Cosima asks, breaking the silence. Beth shakes her head.
"I don't know," she says. She rolls up her sleeve and shows Cosima her arm. All three of them lean closer to look at the needle marks on the inside of her elbow.
"Blood tests," Cosima says, running a finger over the marks. "They could have done a transfusion or injected you with something. Do you feel any different after they run one of these tests?"
"Cos, I've been feeling like shit for weeks," Beth replies quietly, not meeting Cosima's eye. "I wouldn't know the difference." She shakes the quiet moment off and turns to address Sarah.
"You probably don't have a monitor at this point," she says, rolling the sleeve of her dress back down. "You might," she says to Cosima. "But since you just got to a new school you might be safe." She sighs, looking up at Alison who is still perched on the arm of her chair. "Ali, I'm going to be honest with you. If I had to bet on your monitor I'd bet on Donnie."
"Donnie," Alison says, alarm creeping into her voice. "But I've known Donnie since high school. How can he be my monitor?"
Beth shakes her head. "They go for whoever is closest to the test subject." Her eyes grow soft as she looks at Alison. "Can you think of anyone closer to you?" Alison looks like she doesn't want to answer the question and Beth squeezes her hand. "There are plenty of ways they could have gotten to him, especially with the business trips he takes. I'm sorry."
"Who is they?" Sarah asks, cutting into their moment. All the information is circling through her head as she tries to grasp at it and make some sort of sense out of anything.
"I don't know," Beth says. "That would be the next step, finding out who they're working for and subsequently who it is that is interested in us."
"And who created us and why," Cosima breaks in, latching onto the scientific side of things. Sarah is about to ask another question when a phone rings and they all jump. It's Beth's phone and Sarah notices for the first time that she has two. Beth picks it up off the table and looks at it, giving a watery sigh.
"It's my partner," she says, dropping her head into her hands and letting the phone drop back onto the table where it stops ringing. "I have a hearing tomorrow and he thinks I'm bailing."
"Which you tried to do," Sarah points out, earning herself another Alison glare. She's becoming immune by this point. "It's the truth," she says, getting irritated. She stands up from her seat, Cosima's eyes following her nervously. She moves to stand in front of the arm chair that Beth is sitting in, leaning over and bracing a hand on either arm, getting in the other woman's space.
"Look," she says, leaning in close. "I know that this is shit. I've just gotten thrown into it headfirst and it's shit. But you're not the only one dealing with it. You have three clones in Europe already dead. You have one who risked her ass to get you lot blood samples and she's dying. Cosima over here is trying to become a bloody doctor while dealing with this mess, and this one just found out that her husband is probably running tests on her." Beth looks up, standing her ground and not backing away despite the tears that are gathering in her eyes. "It's shit, but you're not alone. They need you," she glances up at Alison, who is looking at the scene with a mix of horror and awe on her face. "And I'm pretty sure they love you. Now are you gonna buck up and get your shit together and help, or are we gonna have to watch you to stop you from offing yourself. Cause I did it once and we can do it again, but it would be a hell of a lot easier if we didn't have to."
The phone begins ringing again and Sarah glances over at it quickly before looking back at Beth. "What's it gonna be? Are you in?" Beth hesitates a moment before nodding and Sarah snatches the phone up off the table. "What do you do anyway?" she asks, Cosima never having given her a straight answer earlier.
"I'm a cop," Beth says, eyeing the phone in her hands.
"Shite," Sarah breathes, thinking of all the things she's done in the past that could have (and have) gotten her arrested. She glances at the screen and mouths 'Art' before pressing the answer button. Beth makes a halfhearted move in her direction before letting her head fall into her hands again.
"Hello?" she says, taking on Beth's accent. "Hey Art. No. Christ, no, I'm not running." There's silence on Sarah's end for a few moments and she begins moving around the room, opening doors as she goes. Alison moves to get up and stop her but Beth pulls her back down, watching Sarah like a hawk. Sarah looks into the craft room and a broom closet before finding the bathroom and stepping inside. "Look, I've got the stomach flu. It's not an excuse! Yeah, I'll come in and vomit on them, sound good to you?" She reaches over and flushes the toilet for good measure, making sure that the phone is close enough that Art can hear. "We have to reschedule. I'm out of commission, man! We have no choice. I'm gonna go spend the rest of the night in the bathroom now. Yeah, thanks. Bye Art."
Sarah hangs up and drops the phone into the surprised cop's lap. "Problem solved," she says, slipping back into her own accent. "You're good, yeah? Back in, staying in the land of the living, all that?" She looks at Beth with an expectant expression. "Cause you're gonna have to deal with Art eventually, and he didn't sound too pleased."
"Yeah," Beth says in a slightly shaky voice. The surprise on her face at someone she only just met caring so much is evident and Sarah gives her a small smile. "Thank you."
Sarah sits down, feeling Cosima's impressed gaze but ignoring it for the time being. "No problem. Is there anything else? Not that this hasn't been plenty."
"I need to meet Katja," Beth sighs, picking up the pink phone and scrolling through the texts that have been coming in from the German clone. "She arrives tomorrow afternoon and she brought the samples."
"Good, because I leave to go back tomorrow night," Cosima says, relief evident in her voice.
"Go back where?" Sarah asks.
"University of Minnesota. It's where I'm studying. And I need those samples to take back with me to the lab. Do you want me to go get them?" She asks Beth, who shakes her head.
"No, I can go. I arranged it and she's expecting me. She's already wary of tricks."
"By tomorrow afternoon I'm betting that you'll be going through some bloody heavy withdrawals. Am I wrong?" Sarah says, and Beth drops her head again. "Not to be pushy or anything, but you did say you're back with us now. Which means that by this time tomorrow you should be going through some withdrawals, if you get what I mean?" Sarah finishes pointedly and Beth nods at her lap. "In that case, I'll go."
"She's expecting me," Beth says, beginning to sound exhausted. "She's more frightened and confused than any of us, and with good reason. Unless..."
"What?" Sarah asks, not liking the look on Beth's face.
"Be me," she says, eyes wide. "Be me and meet Katja. You already fooled Art."
"Over the phone!" Sarah says, not liking this idea at all. "We have the same face, yeah. But that's it Beth. I don't know how to be a cop."
"You don't have to be," Beth replies. She digs around in her purse until she finds a set of keys. "Just put on some of my clothes. Paul's not home this weekend, so you don't even have to deal with him. And take my car."
"Beth," Sarah says, her heart dropping. "Beth, you shouldn't—you shouldn't trust me." She finds herself regretting her past and her fight or flight instincts, which usually mean stealing from people to get by. This woman seems to think that she can let her into her life without even knowing her. It seems naive for a cop to trust so readily, especially when Sarah doesn't even trust herself.
"Sarah, you saved my life," Beth says, standing up from the chair and pressing the keys into her hands. "I don't know you, but you didn't let me make a stupid and permanent mistake. I do trust you."
Sarah takes the keys, swallowing down the lump in her throat. "Who is Paul?" She asks in lieu of saying anything else.
"He's—he's my monitor," she says. There's a small intake of breath from Alison, who has been uncharacteristically quiet all this time. Cosima makes a sympathetic sound and Sarah senses that there is more to Paul than they are letting on. But she doesn't ask questions. Instead she nods.
"I'll meet Katja. As you," she says.
"And I'll owe you," Beth replies. "In fact, I owe you a lot." She looks to Cosima. "My car is parked at—at Huxley station," she says, tripping over the name of the place where she tried to end her life only hours before. "Can you take her?"
"Yeah man," Cosima says, getting up and finding her bag. As she rummages around for her keys Beth addresses Sarah one more time.
"Be careful," she says. "Don't get caught. If they catch you they're going to assign you a monitor and then you're in the same deep shit as the rest of us. Stay under the radar."
"That's what I'm good at," Sarah says. Beth hands her the obnoxious pink phone.
"For now, you're me. If anything comes through that's not Katja, call Alison. If anything else happens, call Alison. We'll be waiting by her phone. And we'll get you your own if you decide to stick with us after this. I hope you will," she hesitates for a moment and extends her hand for Sarah to shake. Sarah pulls her in for a hug instead.
"Take care," she says. She's not normally a hugging person, but after everything that has happened tonight she feels like the cop is a special exception.
"I'll be fine," Beth replies. "It's you that I'm worried about."
"Don't be." She follows Cosima out the door. As she turns to push it shut she sees Beth cross back over to the arm chair. Alison hands Beth her own pink phone and Beth takes it and puts it down on the table in front of them. She sits down and pulls Alison off the arm of the chair and into her lap, holding her tightly and burying her face in her hair.
"Who's Paul?" Sarah asks Cosima as she slides into the passenger seat of the car. The scientist is writing something out on a card.
"Her boyfriend," she says, handing the card to Sarah. It has an address on it. "Or, not anymore I guess. That's Beth's address. I know she says he's out of town, but watch out for him when you get there, ok? He probably doesn't know that she knows and it needs to stay that way, at least for now." She gives Sarah a sympathetic smile. "You ready for this?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm good," she replies. "I can do this."
Cosima doesn't look so sure, and the feeling is not reassuring to Sarah. When Sarah remains quiet Cosima starts the car and pulls away from Alison's house, the gravel crunching under her tires.
I hope you all enjoyed! I actually sat down the other day and wrote out how I want this to end, so now I've got a little direction. But it's a long road till we get there, so make yourselves comfortable. ;) And reviews make my day!