A/N: MAJOR SPOILERS 2x20.

Had a lot of feels with that one. Just a look at something I don't expect to see on the show next week, but still needed to work out.

Enjoy!

When the call came it was the last thing she expected. She was getting ready to leave the lair, Digg intending to take the night shift and watch over Roy when her phone rang.

"Oliver?" Digg asked, and she shook her head in confusion,

"No, it's Detective Lance,"

"Detective? What can I do for you?" she asked, assuming he was calling about the manhunt for Roy, even though the kid lay only a few feet away from where she stood.

She heard him sigh and something made the hairs on her arms stand up.

"Ms. Smoak...Felicity it's...it's your...it's Oliver," she'd never heard him so affected before and all the air left her lungs as she gripped the table for support,

Before she could ask a question he continued, "Moira Queen has been murdered,"

She didn't know what noise escaped her throat but it was loud and agonized enough to send Digg running, he stood with a hand on her arm, keeping her upright as tears filled her eyes,

"Where's Oliver?" she managed to get out through a rapidly narrowing throat,

"He and Thea are at the hospital. There was a car accident first but…she was run through with a double edged blade."

"Slade-"

Digg tensed, almost gripping her elbow to the point of pain but she didn't feel it. She didn't feel anything just then beyond pain for what Oliver must be going through.

"I just...I thought he'd want you to know,"

Lance hung up before she could reply and it took Digg slipping the phone from her toneless fingers for her to blink, spilling tears down her cheeks,

"Felicity-"

"Moira's dead. Slade killed her. There was a car accident and Thea and Oliver are at the hospital. I don't…" she said it as quick as she could because she knew as soon as she was finished she wouldn't be able to speak

"Oh god," Digg stepped away, both hands coming up to cover his face and then his head,

There was a long beat of silence and then she was moving, grabbing her bag and her phone and all while on unsteady legs.

"You okay?"

"No," she answered honestly, raising her eyes to find his as they shared a common fear. "Oliver-"

"I know," he replied.

Slade had already done too much damage to Oliver's psyche. But to have killed his mother…

"We have to go," she was already heading for the stairs, barely noticing as Digg put an arm around her back and turned her towards him,

"Hey, we're not going to let him run this time, okay?"

She bit her lip and gave him a tight nod, because after last year and Tommy that's exactly what she expected,

The drive to the hospital was much too long even though she knew Digg drove as fast as he could. When they burst through the doors she was the one who marched to the front desk and demanded to know where Oliver and Thea were.

She was starting to use her loud voice with the uncooperative attendant when Lance pushed open a door and gave a low whistle. Felicity threw the woman a slightly superior look and didn't look back as she and Digg hurried towards the detective.

"Where are they? Are they okay? What happened? How did Slade get them?" she rattled off question after question as they walked quickly down the hallway,

"I don't have many answers, but they're right inside here and I think they could use a friendly fa-"

He pushed open a door but the only one inside was a glassy eyed Thea who sat perched on the edge of a chair, white bandage on her forehead, with her arms wrapped tightly around her middle. She didn't even seem to notice they'd entered.

"Where's Oliver?" Lance asked, looking up and down the hallway,

Felicity and Digg exchanged a worried look and she had already taken a few steps down a side hallway but cut her eyes back to see Thea so broken and alone,

"I'll stay with her, go find him." Digg said sharply and she didn't hesitate.

She ran, knowing he'd have a head start, her head filled with nothing but worry for what he would do. She rounded another corner and saw a door at the end that led to the outside just shutting. Putting on a burst of speed she slammed through and took in a gulping breath of night air, head swiveling both directions until she spotted him to her left.

He was only ten feet away, one hand braced on the brick wall as he leaned over and retched.

Heart breaking, she didn't think as she ran towards him, slipping under his arm as she wrapped an arm around his back the best she could like she had done earlier in the lair.

He didn't even acknowledge she was there, just wiped his mouth with his sleeve and staggered back until he hit the wall. She tried to brace him, stepping between his feet and moving until she could clutch handfuls of his jacket in an effort to keep him upright but he sank like an anchor and she went with him until he was sitting sprawled on the cold sidewalk with her kneeling between his legs.

She hadn't seen him after Tommy but she imagined this is what he had looked like. There was a bloody gash on his head that wasn't covered, tear tracks streaking his dirty face, but it was his eyes that made her weep. He looked right through her, lost and adrift in a nightmare she couldn't pull him from because it wasn't a nightmare at all.

Her hands traveled up until she could take his face in her hands, feeling the weight of his head as he didn't try to hold it up.

"She's gone...I did it," he mumbled, so quiet she almost didn't hear him,

"No, Oliver, it wasn't you. It was Slade, he did this. Not you." she whispered fiercely but he just shook his head and shut his eyes,

"I did it,"

"What happened, tell me what happened,"

He shook his head again and grimaced, "Tell me, Oliver, please,"

"It was like before. Just like Shado. He had Thea and Mom and...he wanted me to choose,"

Felicity gasped in horror, a fresh wave of tears making her vision blurry, and she shifted closer.

"I tried to tell him to take me, to kill me, but he wouldn't,"

A pain ripped through her chest at the thought of what he had offered, and she knew he had. She knew he would have gladly given up his life for his mother or his sister.

"Oliver, it wasn't your fault. He's crazed! There was nothing you could have done,"

He looked at her then, and she didn't see the strong, amazing man she worked with everyday. Instead she saw a heartbroken little boy, "She's dead...mom's dead,"

He crumpled forward, his head landing on her neck and she wrapped her arms around him, feeling his tears drip underneath her collar as his sobs shook both of them.

She didn't know how long they sat there. She sensed Digg close by at some point, but he didn't move to interrupt, his presence was enough for her to feel his support and she knew they'd all have to rely on each other more than they ever had before to get through this.

Her fingers combed through Oliver's hair, as she softly shushed him, and held him as tight as she could. When he calmed some he didn't make any move to pull back.

"She knew," he whispered,

"Knew what?"

"She knew," the emphasis on the second word made her freeze as she realized what he meant,

"She'd known for a year. She said…" his voice cracked, "She said she was proud of me,"

Felicity felt her heart seize at his words, unable to comprehend the pain he must be in just then, "Of course she was," she soothed, lips brushing his temple as his arms finally came up to wrap around her waist.

She did the only thing she could which was to hold him and not let go. He wasn't going to run this time. They wouldn't let him. Slade had to be stopped, and they didn't have five months, much less five days to lose Oliver again. But she had to believe as broken as he was just then, he was stronger than before.

He'd come back to her, to them. He'd rally like he always did because he knew no other way. In the end they would win. And if she had to be the one to believe that for him, she'd do that too.