Her phone was ringing for the tenth time that morning. It was surprisingly easy to ignore. Amy knew it was Karma. She also knew she had no idea what to say. Instead of facing her best friend (ex-best friend?), she pulled a pillow over her head and attempted to sleep. Sleeping was basically all she had done for the past few weeks. That and avoiding Karma at all costs, which was in itself an exhausting task. But it was worth it. Honestly, she didn't know how many more times they both were going to fuck up before everything was ruined. It probably already was.

Amy finally moved from the comfort of her bed when the rumbling of her stomach became too loud to ignore. Finishing an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's sounded pretty damn good right now. All she had to do was make it downstairs without being seen by anyone and she could continue to wallow in her odd mixture of self-pity and self-loathing. It was a good plan. But of course, in Amy's life nothing ever went according to plan. She opened her bedroom door to see Karma standing there, hand extended out to knock. Karma looked as bad as Amy felt.

"Karma…" Amy didn't have the time or patience for this shit.

"I love you Amy Raudenfeld. I am in love with you."

"Karma seriously you need to lea-" It took a minute for Karma's words to sink in "wait what?"

"I'm in love with you. And I was just so scared. I've always been so fucking scared of everything. Since the threesome, I think the only thing I've felt is fear. I didn't want to lose you. But I knew I would never be good enough to keep you. So I pushed you away. And I pushed myself toward Liam. Even when every fiber of my being was calling out for you. For us"

Karma pushed past me to sit down on my bed. Am y stood still, frozen in the doorframe.

"And then everything just got so out of hand. I fucked him. You told me you loved me and blindsided me. I was trying to ignore my feelings. And I had finally made things right with Liam, even though in the process I knew I had hurt you. So I pushed you away again. Then you fucked him and my world came crashing down. I had never felt more betrayed in my life and I had no right to feel that way. But I still knew I couldn't lose you. So I tried to preserve our friendship."

It was everything that Amy had been hoping to hear and had never expected to. It was the first time they had been open with each other in months and it was unbelievable therapeutic. Amy was tempted to go and wipe Karma's tears off of her cheeks, but she was afraid to interrupt her monologue.

"And that I had that damn sex dream. It was nowhere near the first of mine that you starred in, and it wasn't even the last. Damn it Amy, I wanted to run. I wanted to escape from the situation because I knew that whatever I did, it would be fucking awful. But you didn't let me. You have always loved me and always seen the best in me. You've always thought of me as a much better person than I actually am. I have no idea what I did to deserve you Amy. To deserve your unconditional love despite treating you so poorly. Hell, I even did it on purpose. I am the worst friend ever…"

Finally joining her on the bed, Amy put her around Karma. She could never stand to let Karma think those things about herself. She was amazing and beautiful and perfect even with her flaws and fuck ups. Amy couldn't stand idly as Karma put herself down. Karma never deserved to feel bad. She never would again if Amy could help it.

"No Karma, you aren't. You're human. You make mistakes. You've made a lot of them. But you always fix them. You're always there. You make everything so much better. You've made me so much better. I have no idea what I'd be without you. You deserve so much more. You deserve everything."

Amy took Karma's hand in her own, rubbing her thumb against the back of it.

"Amy, no. Just no. Let me finish. I need to just get this all out there. Please take everything in before you let me in to hurt you again." Amy opened her mouth to protest, but Karma continued on quickly. "And so I used you. At first, I wanted to reciprocate. You made me feel so good. So loved. I waited my whole life for a fairy tale experience, and in that moment I got it. It didn't matter that it wasn't typical lovey-dovey love making. It was passionate and it was dirty and it was us. It was just two people in love. Two people sharing love. And for some reason, I couldn't handle that."

Karma dropped Amy's hand and fell back on the bed.

"So I made up some bullshit to hurt you. If I hurt you, I wouldn't have to deal with you again, I thought. I could just run away. You would finally see me for what I was, a complete fucking bitch. A bitch who used you for sex. I tried to detach any meaning from what happened that morning. I tried to make it out in my head as pure animal urges. And I almost convinced myself. I really did. That's why I allowed myself to come back the next day and apologize. I actually felt bad. Not even about lying to you, but about using you. I had done some weird doublethink to convince myself of my own fucking lies. It felt like I was faking it all over again."

At this point, Karma was full on crying. Amy's chest felt tight. There was a lump in her throat that she couldn't quite swallow. This was far worse than anything Karma had put her through. Watching Karma hurt was the worst torture imaginable. Amy laid back, taking Karma into her arms. She maneuvered the brunette so that her head was resting on Amy's chest. Gently, Amy started stroking Karma's back. Pressing a light kiss to the top of Karma's head, Amy began to whisper into her hair.

"Sshhh. Baby it's ok. We're ok. We don't have to do this right now. I forgive you. I love you."

"No, Amy. I need to say this. I'll never forgive myself if I don't get all of this out. I need to be open with you. I owe you that at least."

Karma turned so that she was the little spoon before continuing.

"And then you asked to talk about what happened. About how I hurt you. And my web of lies and self-deception started to unravel. I realized how badly I fucked up, and yet I continued to dig the hole deeper. I lied more and more and more. I tried to take away the meaning of what should've been the most beautiful thing we've ever done. I even tried to completely disregard lesbianism. I let myself become a fucking bigot in an attempt to not deal with my own problems. And finally, my plan worked. I broke you. I broke the best thing in my world."

Karma sobbed inconsolably for a few minutes while Amy tried to do anything to fix her. And Amy herself wanted to break down. She couldn't handle Karma hurting. She felt as though she was dying a slow and painful death.

"When you told me you hated me, I finally realized how stupid I was. How stupid I had always been. It was so clear to me in that moment how badly I had fucked up. And I knew that I deserved your hatred. I still do Amy. You should hate me. Please hate me. I love you enough to know that you deserve better than I could ever be. And that's why I am leaving you to find someone better."

Karma stood and brushed the wrinkles from her dress. Amy watched her move in slow-motion. It was only when she reached the door that Amy had realized what Karma had said. What she meant to do.

"Karma, no! What the fuck? No, no , no, no. You can't leave me. Not after all of this. Not after everything" Amy forcefully grabbed her wrist and tugged her back into the room.

"I hurt you. I'm never going to let myself hurt you again." Amy wasn't sure if Karma was trying to convince Amy or herself.

"This would hurt me more than anything in the world. I would hate myself forever for letting you leave this room. For letting you leave me. But I could never hate you. I love you so much. More than I ever thought possible. And now I know you love me too. That is enough for me. That's all I need. We can work out the rest later."

"But…"

"No. We are in love. And we have both been hurt. We have both been shitty people. But now we have each other. And we are so fucking perfect for each other. Everyone else can see that. And I ready to embrace it, to embrace us. Now that I know I have you, I'm never letting you go."

And with that, Amy swept Karma into her arms and kissed her. Really kissed her. She even dipped Karma back, just like in all of Karma's favorite rom-coms that forced Amy to watch over the years. They weren't perfect. They were nowhere close. And they had so much more to figure out and so much more work to do before everything would be fixed. But in that moment, they both knew it would be worth it. Everything had been worth it. They had each other.

AN: BAM done. It's over y'all. It was super smutty and then super angsty and then super dramatic fluff. And this chapter is my shortest yet. But it's over. I really hope you guys liked it. And I hope you felt I stayed true to the show and the characters. It was a lot of fun to write. I'm glad you guys supported it. If you all want a sequel, I'm game. I'd love to explore how they actually recover from all the shit that I needlessly put them through. And I'd love to give actually fluff. Just let me know on my tumblr spoonster-hastings. Thanks again, so much!