– 2 –
Shepard had come down again. "Just checking on you," she'd said. "Everything alright in here?"
Stop, just stop, make this stop.
"I can't let go," Jack had told her, words slipping out before she snapped her mouth shut. That was one wall down, and Shepard knew it, only they both pretended she didn't. Jack didn't want to deal with it, Shepard didn't want to push – something like that.
Jack had told the other woman how Pragia still haunted her. That'd been when she'd learned something about the Commander as well: that despite her big appearance, this first human Spectre, Alliance hero and Savior of the Citadel was afraid. That even though she acted tough, she'd still barely kept cool when they'd faced that Tresher Maw on Tuchanka. That even after everything she'd accomplished, she was still the person who'd had to fight for survival in the slums of Earth; that she was vulnerable.
Jack found out she cared about that.
"I was lucky, because I found people I could trust. Alliance is all about rules, but it provides people to watch your back too. It's sort of like a family I never had. Personally, I think it's worth it."
Shepard had talked about herself, but doing that, she'd given Jack something as well. It's a family you could have too.
The thought had never occurred to her, because team work wasn't a word in her vocabulary, but right now, on this ship, with this crew – the idea didn't sound so bad. She never relaxed. On the Normandy, she had been able to, at least a little.
"I need people. And so do you."