"Where have you been!?!" demanded Temari when they entered Gaara's office ten minutes later.
"What? It's not like we were standing around outside for hours just to piss you off," countered Naruto as he went to sit down next to Kiba.
"I sent Kankuro to get you half and hour ago!"
"It takes time to get back here from the far training grounds."
"Oh for the love a... You're freaking ninja's, aren't you? A walk like that shouldn't have taken more than five minutes, tops!"
"Temari, we aren't super hero's. And we've been out training your Gennin for the last ten hours. It's not like any of us had the energy to run that fast."
"Don't give me any of that crap..."
"Temari. Stop yelling." Gaara entered the room and sat down behind the desk.
"Yes Gaara."
"I see that you have all survived."
Nods all around.
"How was it?"
Naruto smiled, "Great. They loved it!"
"Did they?" He picked up a sticky note that someone had left on his desk. "I was informed of some property damage. And I was told that you were the cause of it, Naruto."
Naruto blinked, "What, you mean the training post?"
Gaara nodded.
"Oh, yeah. Well, that's a funny story actually."
"Is it? Tell me about it."
Naruto looked uncomfortable. "Okay..." He moved closer to Kiba, who was glaring at him with an 'I-told-you-not-to-piss-of-Gaara' look on his face. "One of those Gennin wannabes was giving me trouble about teaching them Taijutsu instead of Ninjutsu, and he was griping because he thought I was some weak lackey that was sent as a space filler or some crap like that. So I showed him my Rasengan."
"And that involved turning a stone training post into dust?"
"It's a powerful technique," he muttered weakly in his defense.
Gaara sighed. "I must ask you to refrain from completely destroying my training equipment."
"Yes Gaara," he said quietly.
"Moving on," continued Gaara. "I witnessed some of the training sessions and I must say that I am impressed with how well you are working with the Gennin. Tsunade was wise to send you to us." (Gaara speak: Thank God! This wasn't a complete waste of time!)
Temari looked like she was about to say something, but was silenced by a glare of Gaara. "I am afraid that you will be unable to continue the training sessions tomorrow. It seems that the academy teachers have decided to use the next three days for a suprise survival drill."
"Didn't they know we were going to be doing this?" asked Shikamaru, confused.
"Yes," nodded Gaara. "But they feel that taking them on the survival drill now will be more efficient. The students think that they will be spending the next few days working with you. Therefore, they are completely unprepared. For some reason, this fact makes them feel the drill will be more effective."
"Academy teachers are weird," said Kiba.
"Hey, Iruka wasn't that bad."
"Yeah, but your biased. Iruka-sensei is practically your dad."
"So? Doesn't mean I don't think some academy teachers are weird. Look at Ebisu-sensei. He's weirder than all of them put together."
"Got that right."
"Children, can we focus for once?"
"Sorry," they both said.
"As I was saying; The academy students will not be here for the next three days, and there are not enough Gennin to spread between the six of you. I've sent a letter to Tsunade informing her that you will be staying for three days longer than originally thought. Therefore you will be returning a full six days later than planned."
"What are we going to be doing for the next three days then?" asked Shikamaru.
"Nothing. Use the time to rest and plan."
"So its basically a paid vacation?" asked Naruto hopefully.
Gaara nodded, "Essentially."
"SWEET!!!" yelled Naruto enthusiastically. "I haven't had a paid vacation in over three years!"
Whimper and a dull thud.
Wiping the blood from his ears, Kankuro said, "Little louder next time. I'm pretty sure there's a few people in Konoha that didn't here you."
Naruto blushed slightly, "Sorry." He slid off the couch he had been sitting on and picked the unconscious Kiba off the floor. "Forgot about his hearing..." said Naruto as he stuffed some gauze into Kiba's bleeding ears.
"I'll call for a medic..." sighed Kankuro as he exited the room.
"I can take him. Just show me were to go," huffed Naruto as he lifted the unconscious boy onto his shoulder.
---------------------------------------------
"Geeze Naruto," joked Tenten an hour later when he and Kiba returned from seeing Gaara's personal medic. "It only took you one day to do something stupid and get your boyfriend injured. That's gotta be a new record or something."
"Aww lay off. It's not like I meant to do it."
"Yeah, but you of all people should have remembered his hyper-active senses."
"I know...I just wasn't thinking."
"Baka."
"It's not like I can't hear you two," said Kiba, a bit louder than he normally would have and fighting the urge to scratch at the gauze that had been packed in his ears. "My ears might be ringing, but I'm not deaf yet."
"I know that."
"Didn't sound like it."
"Sorry."
"Anyway," said Shikamaru before they fell into their stride. "What are we gunna do for the next few days?"
"I say we go out and get tanked," offered Kiba. "Kankuro was saying something about it this morning."
"Isn't he a little young to be out getting tanked?"
"With Temari acting like that all day everyday?"
"Good point."
"All in favor?"
Five hands went up.
"Well then, it's unanimous"
"Unanimous? Excuse me, but you are forgetting someone. I did not raise my hand."
"I know that. But you don't drink, therefore you weren't included in the tally process."
"That is a bit harsh."
"It's the truth isn't it?"
"Yes, but..."
"Lee, quit complaining. If Kankuro buys, then that gets you off the hook."
Lee blinked, "I had not considered that."
"Off The hook? For what?" asked Tenten, confused.
"I lost a bet."
"Ah," she said, nodding. "Haven't I told you not to bet? You have no luck with gambling."
Lee shrugged, "I cannot be faulted for the weather patterns."
"What?"
"The bet was," answered Naruto, "that if the sun came out before we finished training for the day that Lee had to buy a round for everyone tonight. If the sun didn't come out, I would take the two of you out for barbecue."
"Oh." She shrugged and patted Lee's shoulder. "Well then, I guess you're buying tomorrow night."
"Awwww but Tenten!"
"You lost the bet."
"But!"
"I've told you not to gamble. You lost, so you have to pay up."
"Awwwwwwwwww..."
"So we're definately gunna go get tanked?"
"Yes Kiba."
He started tugging out the gauze in his ears, "Okay, then I'm gunna need a little while to change into something less annoying and hide all the weapons and junk in our room."
"Okay... Do I even want to know why?"
Devilish smile from both Naruto and Kiba.
"That's a no."
---------------------------------------------
Two hours later...
"We ready?" asked Shikamaru as Kiba and Naruto finally entered the room.
"If you are," came Kiba's reply.
"Then let's go," said Kankuro.
"Nice jeans..." whispered Tenten as she tried not to stare.
"Thanks...I don't ware them too much, for obvious reasons." He pointed to Naruto with a flick of his head.
Tenten glanced over and saw the blonde staring with the biggest grin she'd ever seen. There was a trail of drool down his shirt and on the ground behind him. "He really seems to like them," she chuckled.
"Oh yeah," he nodded. "Beg's me to wear them all the time."
"I'll bet. Aren't they a bit...tight...?"
"Yeah, but anything that makes your butt look good has to be at least a little tight."
"True," she conceded. "Ya know, I've never seen actual jeans like that before. I thought you were wearing leather at first."
"I have leather pants like these actually, but I didn't bring them."
"Probably a good idea."
"Trust me, it was a very good idea. You think he's bad now..."
"I can imagine."
"What are you two whispering about?" asked Lee.
"Nothing Lee."
"What is wrong with Naruto?"
"Nothing," grinned Kiba. "He just really likes these pants."
Lee dropped back a step to get a better look at Kiba's pants. It took everything Tenten had not to laugh as Lee examined Kiba's pants from behind. "Hmmm... I do not get it."
"Don't worry about it Lee. I would have been surprised if you had."
Tenten bit down on her lip to keep from laughing. She grabbed Lee's shoulder and dragged him forward so that he was walking even with her. "It's a Naruto thing," was all she got out before exploding with laughter.
Lee stared at her, confused. "What is so amusing?"
"Don't worry about it Lee. I'll tell you later."
Lee blinked, still completely confused and blissfully unaware of what was so funny.
---------------------------------------------
Kankuro lead them to his favorite bar. It was off a back alley and clear across Suna. Which is why Kankuro liked it. "It takes longer for the trackers to find me all the way over here if I stay out too late," was his reply when Shikamaru asked him why he liked such a seedy place. "And the bar-tender is cool with me getting tanked here. Most of the other bars won't let me go over five rounds before they start harping on me about how the son of the old Kazekage and the brother of the current one shouldn't be out getting drunk as a skunk." He sighed, "Of course, if they had a sister like Temari, they'd be getting tanked every chance they got."
Shikamaru nodded and ordered the first round. He took the bottles and cups back to the tables that they'd settled on. "Here we go."
Kankuro helped him pass around the liquor and raised his cup in a toast, "Here's to escaping the ranting of an overly-hormonal sister and herds of whiny Gennin."
Everyone raised their cups with cheers of 'here here!'
"So anyway," said Tenten from across their table. "Where'd you get those jeans at? I'm thinkin' of buying Lee a pair."
Kiba chuckled, "Good luck. I've been trying for the better part of a year to get a pair in Naruto's size, but no one has them any more. I'm tempted to find a tailor and get a pair custom made."
"That sucks..."
"Tell me about it."
"Will one of you please tell me what is so fascinating about those jeans?"
"Later Lee."
Lee sighed and took a sip of his soda. "I am not looking forward to the end of this night."
"Why?"
Lee glared at him.
"Good point."
"You and Naruto alone are difficult to handle. Add in Kankuro and it's going to be an... interesting... last call."
"Yeah, but Neji doesn't drink much, and I doubt Shikamaru will get very drunk, so it shouldn't be too bad."
"And you know I can't handle the same amount of alcohol as these two," said Tenten as she sipped at her sake.
"We shall see."
---------------------------------------------
Ten rounds later...
"Ya know what the problem with sake is..." sighed Kiba as he downed another cup.
"What?" asked Naruto.
"It takes to damn long and too damn much before you feel it," replied Kankuro with a deep sigh. "Looks like it's time for the big guns..." He got up and walked to the bar.
"How the hell can he still be walking straight?" said Tenten, blinking and swaying slightly.
"Some of us have a much higher tolerance for alcohol," smiled Kiba.
Kankuro walked back with a bottle filled with a deep amber liquid and several shot glasses.
"Whatcha got there Kankuro?"
"My favorite fall back," he said as he plopped down next to Kiba and passed around the glasses
"Which is?"
"Tequila," he replied, grinning. He poured a shot for Kiba and Naruto. "Wanna try some Tenten?"
"No thanks," she said, shoving her cup away. "I think I'm done."
"Suit yourself," he said as he poured himself a rather larger shot. He raised the glass, "To the genius that is Jose Quervo."
They downed the shots.
Kiba and Naruto both coughed and slammed down the glasses. They weren't used to anything that strong and the alcohol seared their throats. Kankuro however, smacked his lips appreciatively, "That's the stuff."
"Damn," coughed Kiba. "That stuffs strong."
"Yeah...and it's the best damn drink you'll ever have."
"If you say so," coughed Naruto.
"Up for some more?" He lifted the bottle. Kiba and Naruto looked at each other. Shrugging, they pushed their glasses toward him.
"It's gunna be an interesting night."
---------------------------------------------
Ten round of Jose Quervo later...
The three of them had jumped up on top of one of the tables and were singing the lyrics to "Ten Rounds with Jose Quervo." Lee was siting three tables away, shaking his head as he watched them make fools of themselves in public. Tenten sat next to him, laughing at the scene. Neji had dissapeared somewhere around the thirteenth round of the night. Shikamaru, who had probably twice the tolerance of all them put together thanks to his father, was watching the show and smiling. It was all very funny. Best part was, he'd brought a camera.
"And after six rounds with Jose Quervo... Or was it seven?" they sang, arms on each other's shoulders and swaying wildly.
Shikamaru swore loudly as his camera ran out of film for the third time. He dove into his bag for more film before he missed anything too funny or stupid.
"And after ten round with Jose Queeearvooooo..."
Just as Shikamaru got the new roll of film in his camera and picked it up, Naruto tripped over his feet and flipped off the table. He landed face first in the next table and the whole thing was crushed to pieces. Shikamaru snapped about half a dozen pictures of the fall and resulting damage. "Priceless..." he whispered, a drunken smile plastered on his face.
"Hahahahaha! Naru fall down!" called Kiba, completely tanked.
Naruto sat up and grinned stupidly, "Let's go again! Let's go again!"
Kankuro laughed so hard that he fell backward off the table and landed on his ass. He was so wasted that he didn't even realize he was on the ground untill he looked up and noticed that the ceiling was farther away than it had been a second beforehand. "Hahahahahahaha! I fall down too!"
"Damn..." blinked Tenten. "They are totally gone."
"Do not remind me. I seem to be the only on here that is not intoxicated to the point of not being able to walk straight."
"Excuse me???"
"Tenten, you cannot stand up straight right now."
"I can too!"
"Prove it."
Tenten glared at him and pushed her chair back. She stood up, "See!"
"Take a few steps."
She grinned thinking, "This'll be easy." Two steps and she was face down on the floor. "Alright, I get it..." she giggled as she sat up and dragged herself back onto her chair.
"Okay kids," said the bartender as he stepped over to the scene of the destruction. "I think you've had enough for tonight."
"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww," whined Naruto and Kiba.
"Come on Bar-keep. Jus' one more round!" pleaded Kankuro.
"Now, now. You've had enough. I draw the line at demolishing furniture."
"Awwww man..."
"Okay," sighed Kankuro as he stood up shakily. He pulled out his wallet, "Here." He handed the bartender some cash. "For the table and chairs." He blinked and hiccuped. "Oh, and the tab too."
The bartender nodded and helped pick Naruto up off the floor. "You kids go home before you get in trouble. It's gunna hard enough getting those three back across town without the cops noticing," he said to Lee, Tenten, and Shikamaru.
"Come on boys," said Tenten as she helped support a wobbly Naruto.
Lee tried to help Kankuro, but he waved him off with an, "I'm okay. I don' need any help." Lee only smiled and waited for the tanked boy to take a few steps. Kankuro got not five steps away before passing out cold. Lee knelt and picked up the heavy boy like he was a feather. "Can you handle Kiba, Shikamaru?"
"I think so," came the slightly giddy reply. (Who woulda thought that Shikamaru was such a happy drunk?) He slipped Kiba's arm over his shoulder and supported him as he tried to walk.
"Come on, the faster we get out of here, the faster we get back."
The bartender held open the door for them and waved goodbye as they exited. "You kid's be careful."
---------------------------------------------
It took awhile, but they managed to get back to the tower without being stopped by the local police. Lee, the only one not exhausted and panting, dropped Kankuro on the couch in Naruto's room. "There is no way that I can sneak him past his sister's room with him snoring like that." Tenten nodded and dropped Naruto on the bed. "Where'd Shikamaru get too?"
"No idea."
"I'm here," he yawned as he entered the room. "Kiba tripped and it took me a minute to get him back on his feet."
"Shay...I di'n t'ip..i'sh was tha' damn pink donkey... or wha'sh it an elephant..." he slurred after Shikamaru dropped him on the other side of the bed.
"What the hell is he talking about?"
"I think he had a little too much to drink."
"I'd have to agree with you on that."
"Let 'um sleep it off. Best thing for it."
"You'd know all about that..."
"I'd better after all the time's my dad's stumbled home saying junk like that."
"Whatever..." yawned Tenten. "All I know is that I need sleep."
"Me too," nodded Shikamaru.
"Should we really leave them alone when they are like this?"
"They'll be fine Lee, don't worry so much," said Shikamaru as he walked out of the room.
"I am not so sure."
"You can stay here if you want, but I'm about to pass out."
"Alright..." he said, defeated. "I shall go with you." With one last concerned look at the boys, Lee closed the door and left with Tenten.
---------------------------------------------
Several hours later...
Naruto sat up and looked around, "Where the hell am I???" It took him a second to register that he was back in his room in the Kazekage's tower. "How the hell did I get back here?" He looked around and thanks to the pre-dawn light was able to see Kiba laying next to him, fully clothed and snoring loudly. He didn't even notice Kankuro on the couch untill the boy grunted and turned over. "What is he doing here?" He yawned sleepily. He was half way to remembering what had happened last night when the after affects of all that alcohol hit. The room spun violently for a moment and he fell back onto his pillows. He slammed his eyes shut to block out the nauseating sight. He lay there for a full five minutes before the feeling of nausea subsided. He opened his eyes slowly. The room had at least stopped spinning. He sat up slowly. As the nausea faded, his head began aching. He knew it was only the beginning. He was no novice when it came to drinking, not after spending two and a half years with a guy like Jiraiya. He glanced over at the clock on the table beside his bed. 6:30 am. "Great..." he sighed as he lay back down and tried to fall back asleep with Kiba snoring next to him.
---------------------------------------------
It was past noon before any of them really got up and out of bed. Lee was the only one without any kind of a hangover, owing to the fact that he doesn't drink. Neji was best off of the drinkers, have consumed the least off all of them. Shikamaru was cheerful enough, relatively speaking. He was the one with the highest alcohol tolerance, so he wasn't as affected as the rest. Tenten was tired, and her head hurt a little, but other than that she was fine. Naruto, Kiba, and Kankuro however, where a completely different story.
"Ohhhhhhhh... my head..." groaned Kiba from the couch he was laying on. He, Naruto, and Kankuro were pretty much dead to the world. "Anyone get the number of that bus..." he joked, laughing weakly.
"That's what you get," scolded Tenten. "You know that drinking like that has consequences."
"Not today Tenten..." groaned Naruto. "You can be mother-henish when my headache goes away tomorrow."
"Serves you right for acting like a bunch of idiots."
More groans from the hungover boys.
"Anyone know a good hangover cure?" muttered Kiba weakly.
"No," groaned Naruto. "Jiraiya might, but he never told me."
"Weaklings..." sighed Shikamaru. "I drank twice what you did and I don't feel a thing."
"You aren't human when it comes to booze."
"You're one to talk, Naruto. Kyuubi can't fix hangovers or what?"
"Ugh... he's as hungover as I am... And he won't stop whining about it..."
The sober-ish ones laugh and the hungover ones groan.
"Not so loud," whimpered Kiba.
"Next time you won't drink so much, will you?"
"Never again..." he groaned.
"Good."
"Anyone got some aspirin?"
"Never take aspirin for a hangover," said Shikamaru seriously. "The combination of alcohol and aspirin can cause massive liver damage."
"Oh..." blinked Naruto. "What can I take?"
"Not much of anything..." He paused to think. "I'd suggest drinking lots of water. It helps to flush the junk out of your system."
"Ugh...water tastes horrible right now."
"Well then, you'll just have to suffer."
"Ugh..." groaned all three suffering boys.
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AN: I know, I know. That was a bit harsh. But you cannot honestly think I'd let them get away with drinking like that without some kind of consequences? Ahhhhh Looney Tunes...gotta love that pink elephant. This is what happens when I spend all day watching Looney Tunes and babysitting my god-kid. And I couldn't help the Kiba in tight pants thing. It just popped into my head while I was writing this. Seriously thought, binge drinking is bad people. And now that my conscious is clear, I leave you with this thought: If Naruto was drooling while Kiba was wearing tight jeans, would he look like a mini Niagara when he's wearing real leather? Stupid question, I know. But I just can't help asking.