Boone stopped the recording and rubbed his eyes. He knew about her getting shot, knew that some goon named Benny had done the execution-style attempted murder. Hell, the whole Mojave would have known. Mr. New Vegas blasted it across the airwaves for more than a week after her awakening. It had become the reoccurring advertisement for Mojave Express.
"I should have paid more attention . I'm usually more cautious about the 15 and I knew that the Legion was scouting the territory. Our run-ins weren't the first ones I'd had with them," Lucky explained. "It'd been going on, oh, four years – give or take. It's part of the reason I'd avoid the Nevada territories."
Boone stared at the Pip-Boy. Four years? After all this time, he'd figured that he was the catalyst for the hit squads that attacked him and Lucky at every turn. He shook his head, bewildered by the revelation.
"Why?" he uttered. "What did you do to them?"
"I don't know why. I never stopped to ask," she replied as if she intended for him to question her about it. He could tell she was holding something back. Her voice drifted back and forth as if caught up in reasons that she wouldn't share. "It's part of the reason I'd travel alone. I didn't want someone – an innocent – to get caught up in my disaster.
I just wanted to do my job, get paid, and get the hell back to NCR. They didn't do too much when I was within its borders, but every once in a great while, they'd come. By comparison, the Long 15 is treacherous on a good day and I would have gladly walked it unarmed during a nuclear winter than face that relentless bunch." She let out a sigh and softly chuckled. "Anyways, Goodsprings.
I hadn't even made it there when everything went south. I had no idea what happened. Blitz attacks tend to happen that way. The last thing I remember was a sharp pain to the back of my head. Hell, I couldn't even tell you exactly where the attack happened."
Boone heard her dismissive tone. He knew that what had happened caused more harm than she had let on. Part of him wanted her to open up, not seem like such an automaton about tragedy, but then again, that was the nature of the beast in the Wastes. You learned to deal with tragedy or you didn't and you let it consume you, like it had him. She lit another cigarette before continuing.
"The next thing I remember is waking up to digging and people around me. At first, I thought the Legionaries had finally caught up to me. But this wasn't exactly their style. They could have strung me up, made me an example for the NCR, or whatever their little sadistic minds could dream up.
To be honest, I was hoping it was them."
Boone was taken aback by her honesty. He couldn't understand why someone would want to be captured by them. It would have been worse being that she was a woman. He knew it; she knew it.
He pulled open the top desk drawer and grabbed a tumbler and bottle of whiskey. He poured the golden liquor into the glass and slammed it down without taking the time to savor it.
"I got tired of running. Running from them, the past, the unknown, the memories. I to this day still feel like I'm living a lie. Maybe it's not one I created, but one I perpetuated out of sheer survival. Denial. Whatever the fuck you want to call it.
I think after everything we've been through you have a pretty decent grasp of where I'm coming from and where I'm going."
Boone shook his head and poured another glass of whiskey, this time almost to the brim. She kept skirting the issue. The why, the need, just that it had to be that way. It was one of the most frustrating things about her. You almost needed to rip her apart to get her to spill even an iota of a detail even for context's sake.
"You can really be insufferable sometimes. You know that?" he muttered before taking a long swig of the booze.
He wiped his mouth with his sleeve and placed the glass next to the box. He looked around the desk and saw a framed picture on the desk. It was a picture from after Hoover Dam.
Lucky, Lily, and him stood on the Great Wall after the battle was over. The two of them were decked in ranger gear. His the familiar NCR standard, hers lighter, like a desert ranger's. She had her helmet off, a small look of satisfaction and juxtaposition on her face. He didn't take off his, he didn't want to show the level of apprehension and what he could only describe as satisfied blood lust. Lily sneered, like she always did, even if that wasn't her intention. She seemed proud of her adopted granddaughter.
But that was before he knew something had happened to Lucky. Something that he couldn't stop. He didn't know the damage the final battle had wrought on her body. She didn't show it, nor did she bring it up. It was their moment to savor. Their retribution spent with all the dead at their backs.
"I guess I'd harbored my own feelings on an impending demise as merely an option. There's nothing more than realizing the time, place,and cause of your death. Some people should be so lucky in some instances. For others, the not knowing is a blessing in disguise." she stopped, inhaling sharply. He knew she was talking about Carla and what he had done. "And for those who know the time, place and cause and beg for it from their loved ones..." She paused for a moment and cleared her throat. "I don't know who has it harder: the ones who are dead, knowing that their family is their executioner or the one who pulls the trigger to end their father's suffering."
Boone stopped the tape and stood up. The way she had said the last line shook him. He couldn't tell if she was questioning him or herself about such an action. She knew why he killed Carla; she agreed with the action, but this was about her. She'd stood in his shoes, too. Except they were eye to eye when she'd killed her father. They could speak to each other.
She never spoke about anything like that. It was the briefest of glimpses into her life. And in a flash he'd cut her off with his discomfort. He couldn't believe she'd close off something like that, whether to protect herself from reliving it or to seem more average to him. He was guilty of the same thing, too. He didn't want people close to him and yet, he found Lucky being the closest friend he'd had since Carla.
He'd come to rely on her. He cared for her as any friend would, but she still kept those types of feelings to herself and he would never admit how much he cared. It was a dangerous thing. He didn't want to be the cause of someone's death. He couldn't deal with that again. It'd happened too many times. Even after he'd try to warn her away, she stood by his side. Maybe that was why he liked her. She wasn't afraid of the possibility.
He started the recording again, giving her the proper respect she deserved, and closed his eyes. He could picture her smoking her cigarette, drinking a rum and Nuka and staring at the picture on her desk.
"I didn't have much time to respond. I can admit I was scared. Sure. I can also admit I wasn't ready. I just let that madman talk. The Khans had to be strung out; they were just too twitchy to do anything. I could only watch the end come like a freight train. And then the lights were out.
I have nothing profound to say about it. Just that there was nothing. I felt time stop. Nothing existed. Heat nor cold, light or dark. Everything just disappeared with a flash of light. It was a rather unspectacular demise, I might add. Though the view of Vegas was nice. I was kinda hoping I'd get to see it again."
Boone smirked and let out a wry chuckle. She was deflecting again. She laughed at inappropriate times when she was nervous, turned away when she was hurt. He saw her cry only once. And had him on the verge of breaking down a couple times. She'd figured him out better than he could ever do to her.
"I'm glad I did survive. It just seemed strange that I went from this complete isolationist loner, to someone who was willing to have someone tag along.
Speaking of tagging along, Novac is doing well, if you didn't know. You should stop by when you get the chance."
He frowned at that town. Too many ghosts lingered there for him. Lucky was his escape from that. But that was where he'd met her, even if the situation wasn't the best one. He kicked himself later about how he'd treated her and the flying tin can. Even Cass got the cold shoulder from him when they were introduced.
But Novac, yeah, that's where things changed.