Accidentally

Chapter 11: ...Karma's a Bitch

Sakura thought.

And thought.

She thought some more.

She should stop thinking so we can read.

"Okay," She stood, heading for her bedroom door. "I can do this. I can totally forget what he did and just apologize already. Totally."

She grabbed the handle, but it wouldn't turn. "OH, COME ON!"

She pulled and turned violently, but the little shit just wouldn't budge. Calming herself, she shrugged.

"Ah, well. This must be karma's way of telling me that I should still hate him."

But as soon as she released the knob, the door flung open. 'Are you serious?'

There stood an exhausted Sasori. "Sa...Sakura..." He gasped.

"Well, that sure explains why the damn thing wouldn't open. Thanks a lot, karma." She mumbled angrily.

Sasori straightened himself, putting on the brightest smile he could muster-which was very dim. Sakura returned to her bed, sitting and crossing her arms.

'I definitely don't want to apologize now. He came into my room!'

"Uh. Sakura...listen, I-"

"You don't have to say it."

"...?"

Sakura closed her eyes, which, seconds later, she realized that that was not the best thing to do around Sasori of all people. When her lids shot open, Sasori was sitting beside her on her bed. Goddamn Ninjas.

"You don't have to apologize, or anything."

Sasori pouted slightly, turning away. "Apologize? Why would I apologize to you? You killed me!"

Sakura blinked. He sure was a lot better at showing emotions now. Then again, she guessed that came with the whole, You're-A-Zombie-Human-Now package.

She smiled. "I know you hate me."

It was Sasori's turn to blink.

"Haruno Sakura, I do not-"

At that very moment in time, Kisame busted through the doorway, grinning widely. "You guys! Kakuzu is chasing Hidan, who's chasing Deidara, who's chasing Tobi, who's chasing a butterfly! You have to see this!"

Sakura smiled brightly, inwardly thanking Kisame for ruining that sweet, painfully awkward moment. She got up to approach the scene, going after Kisame.

Sasori frowned. "I do not hate you." Before following the pinkette.

OoOoOo

Stepping outside, Sakura analyzed the event before her, walking up to the remaining Akatsuki.

Sudden realization hit her as she noticed the third person back. "...OH MY GOD! WHY ISN'T HIDAN WEARING ANY PANTS?"

Itachi covered his ears at the outburst, and in an instant, Pein was beside Sakura, covering her eyes.

"Someone, PLEASE explain to me what the HELL is going on!" Sakura shouted, and she could swear she felt Pein's shoulders shake from laughter.

Konan smiled sheepishly. "Well, Tobi decided that he wanted to be an artist like his 'Senpai', and stole a bit of Deidara's detonating clay. So that little deformed butterfly you see, is Tobi's creation."

Zetsu came up, right out of the ground, continuing for Konan. "But, alas, Tobi was unaware that it was detonating clay. So now, Asshole one and Asshole two are trying to prevent the base's destruction.Silence yourself. Do not be so harsh."

Kisame put a friendly hand on Sakura's shoulder, finishing the brief. "Hidan is chasing Deidara naked because he's drunk, as you can probably imagine, based on what Itachi told me."

Sakura's cheeks turned a bright red as she glared at the Uchiha through Pein's hand. The corner of Itachi's lip twitched, but it only lasted a second. Good thing Sakura missed that. She would have gone crazy.

Sakura sighed agitatedly. "Okay. That helps, but I sill don't get why Kakuzu is in the mix."

Pein removed his hand, but turned her away from the scene. "Hidan has been walking around the base like that all day; even before he inhebriated himself. So, naturally, Kakuzu was angered by this and, due to his protective feelings over you, wishes to kill Hidan."

Sakura shrugged. "Oh, well then I guess-WAIT, WHAT? Protective? As if! You all are anything but! Sasori, Itachi, and Kakuzu hate me! Hidan creeps the shit out of me! And Tobi is annoying as hell!"

Pein winced at her voice. How could one human being be so loud? "Then what about me? Or Konan, Deidara, Zetsu, and Kisame? What about us?"

Sakura slumped over, feeling tired and in aching need of a nap. "Well, I-I know that...that you're like a father figure. I also know that Konan-chan has the Mother slash Sister slash Best Friend title. Kisame is the friend that always keeps you laughing. Zetsu is teaching me a bunch about Botany, and Deidara...Well, Deidara is grumpy sometimes...but he's always the one to try to lighten the mood. He smiles or laughs, and you can't help but do the same."

Kisame ruffled her hair playfully. Deidara threw an arm around her shoulders, grinning wildly at her.(when did he come back? O.o) Zetsu spared a smile. Itachi chuckled? Pein snickered. Wait...PEIN SNICKERED?

"Wh-What's so funny?" Sakura asked uneasily.

Pein smirked, chuckling. "Sakura...you think we hate you? Ha-ha. Your judgements could not be farther from the truth."

Sakura cocked an eyebrow. "Uh. What do you mean?"

Just then, everybody-that wasn't chasing, being chased, etc.-broke out into laughter. Save Zetsu and Itachi, whose smiles grew even wider. Okay, she was officially scared out of her wits.

"To compensate for you willingly joining our organization, we made a vow to keep you safe, and happy." Zetsu explained softly.

"Of course, this is not why we insult your judgement skills," Itachi went on, "Naturally, you were just too hard to hate. We have all grown a bond with you. Whether that bond great or small," This is where Sasori arrived on the scene, albeit a little belatedly,"We are, nonetheless, quite fond of you. All of us."

At that moment, Sakura passed out. Whether because she couldn't handle that load of bullshit, or because she had just heard Uchiha Itachi speak more in two minutes, than she had since she'd known him, she just didn't give a damn.

Falling backwards, Sasori was first to step in and catch the kunoichi. Sighing, he began carrying her back to her room. For some reason, Deidara was following after.

"Danna! Wait up, yeah!" The blond yelled after his former partner.

Sasori paused, turning and keeping a good hold on the pink-haired kunoichi. "What do you want, Brat?"

Deidara's face began to glow, nearly matching the unconscious pinkette's hair. "Um-I-...uh. I was wondering...If-"

Sasori gave him the dryest look. "Get on with it. Are you making a statement or asking me out on a date? I don't like to be kept waiting, Deidara."

Said Iwa-nin glared at Sasori, before his cheeks turned an even deeper shade of red. "I was wondering if...well, is Sakura-chan-"

OoO(Ha! I cut you off! Deidara-chan, you dirty bird!)oOo

_Somewhere in Rain That Isn't the Akatsuki Base_

"Did you hear that, Sasuke?"

Kabuto turned to glance at his traveling companion.

...he wasn't there.

"I guess he heard it." Kabuto sighed before jumping into a nearby tree, masking his chakra.

Sasuke's eyes narrowed with farmiliarity at the chakra signatures. Four ninja.

'Naruto, still the most recognizable. Kakashi. He's got his Ninja Dogs out. Hn, Sai. It will be interesting to see him again. The last one is...Hmm...Nara Shikamaru. Ah, that explains it. They're searching for Sakura.'

Sasuke assessed the situation, deciding whether to let them pass, or tell them that, no, Sakura was his to save, and that he had a brother to visit.

OoOoOo

_Hokage's Office_

'I'm counting on you four to bring my daughter back. Especially you, Shikamaru.' The Fifth Hokage laced her fingers together, resting her elbows on her desk.

While Naruto had been away at training, Sakura and Shikamaru had bonded. Greatly. In fact, their bond had grown even stronger-though no one seemed to notice-since Naruto had come back, those three years ago.

Tsunade remembered those days so vividly...

Flashback

Tsunade was the one panting as another day of full-on training came to an end.

Sakura smiled. "Um, Milady, y-you didn't have to hold back, you know."

"I wasn't." The blond breathed honestly.

Sakura laughed. When Tsunade stood, cracking her back, she turned to her young apprentice.

"Well. That was...interesting. Do you have any plans today, Sakura?"

Sakura frowned. "Actually, I do. I hope you don't mind, Milady, but I asked Ino-pig to cover my shift at the Hospital."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Oh? For what reason?"

The corners of Sakura's lips tilted upwards. "Shikamaru said he would pick me up and we would go to Tokka, that new benihana sit-down restaurant."

Tsunade grinned. "Oh, well then I don't mind at all! Go on out and have fun with your little boyfriend!"

"LADY TSUNADE!" Sakura kicked the ground.

Tsunade barely dodged the chunk of earth that came flying up at her. It came from right under her nose. Huh. She hadn't taught Sakura THAT.

And so her apprentice stomped home to clean up, blushing madly.

End Flashback

For Sakura to leave the village...

Tsunade knew that the feelings between the two were strong. Even more so the day after that.

Shikamaru had escorted her to the training grounds. They arrived with their arms hooked, both laughing and smiling.

'Sakura...I don't think you realize just how much you're hurting everyone in this village. This village that you loved, and would have died for. Though, now...'

In that second, Shizune busted through the door. "Lady Tsunade! Anbu Black-ops have finished searching Sakura-san's apartment!"

Tsunade's head snapped up. "And?"

Shizune hesitated. Sighing, she stepped forward, handing the Fifth Hokage a crumpled piece of paper. "They...they found...this. We found it laying by the trash can under her desk in her bedroom."

Tsunade frowned deeply, unfolding the sheet.

"...WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" She yelled, outraged.

'It is absolute. You don't realize it, but...but now, I don't think you really care.'

OoOoOo

"Let noodles boil until firm yet soft. Well, that's...oxymoronic. I'm just gonna go with the Sakura-style directions: 'Let noodles boil until they stick to the tricked out Akatsuki-Fridge'." Sakura mused, stirring with her magical spoon.

She had learned from Kisame, that none of the Akatsuki can cook worth a crap-save himself, of course. But, Sakura figured, after being Uchiha Itachi's partner, there was only so much stress that one...almost human being, could handle.

That is precisely why Sakura was currently making her Sakura-Super-Ramen-Special. She had made it for Naruto on special occasions. Some including:

-His birthday

-Graduation

-Sasuke's leaving

...speaking of Sasuke, she had made it her first time during her Genin days. Team 7 had been spent after a long, agonizing mission...

Flashback(Gah! Another one?)

"Ah...man, I'm exhausted!...Kakashi-sensei! Hey! Can we go to Ichiraku? Please?" A thirteen year old Naruto begged.

Kakashi sighed. "Well, I guess-"

Sakura was quick to cut him off. "Wait, no! Naruto, Kakashi-sensei, Sasuke-kun, I've been...working on something! A ramen recipe! I noticed how it's basically Team 7's trademark dish, and I think I've finally perfected it! Mind being my taste-testers?" She pleaded excitedly.

Naruto gave her a creepy look. "Sure! I'll eat anything you cook, Sakura-chan~"

Sakura smiled nervously. "Heh, right...well? Kakashi-sensei?"

The silver-haired Jounin shrugged. "Fine by me. Anything but having to pay for the 20,000 bowls that Naruto would gulf down at Ichiraku's.

Sakura smiled brightly, before turning bashfully to her last opinion-settler. "Sasuke-kun? How about it?"

Sasuke turned away, and began walking slowly. "I'm getting tired of ramen. I'll just go home."

Sakura smiled sadly at his back. "Oh. Okay."

He stopped. The corner of his mouth twitched up into a smirk.

He turned halfway to face them, eyes trained on Sakura's. "Just kidding."

Her entire face lit up, and she began showing them the direction to her house. Kakashi thought for a moment.

"Oi, Sakura-chan, will your parents mind us appearing on such short notice?"

"Huh? Oh, no. Don't worry. My mother is away right now. Business and such."

Naruto frowned. "And your dad?"

Sakura stopped dead. The others followed suit, worry washing over them.

She turned to them, smiling. A fake smile, but a smile, nonetheless. "I don't have one."

Sasuke blinked. Kakashi's eye narrowed. Naruto was just confused. Though, she continued home, in her usual spunky, upbeat attitude.

They each shared frowns, and looked on at the Haruno before following after her. No questions asked.

She turned back to them, smiling and waving. "Come on, slow pokes! I've still got to MAKE the ramen! We don't want Naru-chan starving to death, do we?"

Naruto was about to cry. That was his Sakura-chan.

Sasuke's gaze to Sakura hardened. 'Sakura...'

So they followed.

...

"Alright! All done! Just enough for everyone!" Sakura chirped, walking into the dining room with a tray that held four bowls.

Naruto inhaled deeply, before his cheeks turned red. "Woohoo! Smells awesome, Sakura-chan!"

"Good," She went around the table, handing off each bowl. "Naruto. Sasuke-kun. Kakashi-sensei. Myself. Great. Eat up!"

Each shinobi broke apart their chopsticks, and began.

...

Naruto didn't think that his grin could get any wider. Or his belly any bigger. "Wow...that was amazing, Sakura-chan...I give it a ten...hundred..."

She smiled. "Thank you, Naru-chan. Sasuke-kun? Kakashi-sensei? How'd you like it?"

Kakashi put his hands together, bowing his head. "Delicious. Arigatou, Sakura-chan."

Sakura turned to Sasuke hopefully. Naruto glared at him. If that bastard said ANYTHING to hurt Sakura's feelings, he'd kill him!

Sasuke crossed his arms, turning his head away and pouting in a childish manner. "It was okay, I guess...thank you, Sakura-chan."

If Sakura's face got any brighter, she swore that everyone in Konoha would go blind. He called her Sakura-CHAN, and THANKED her! She felt like squealing. She also noticed the light flush in his cheeks.

She sent him a sweet, alluring smile, and he tried even herder to look away.

"Oh, come on, Sasuke-kun! You know you loved it!" She cheered, throwing an arm around her shoulders and poking his cheek playfully.

Naruto soon joined her.

End Flashback

Sakura missed those days greatly.

'These days aren't so bad either, though...' She mused as she flung a noodle at the fridge. Perfect.

So she set up ten bowls. Added any necessary meats, vegetables, spices, etc.

With chopsticks at the side of each bowl, she placed them along the enormous table.

Sakura sighed proudly. With a loud pop of smoke, she was on top of the Akatsuki base. She spotted each desired character. Wonderful. Now, to get them all together.

She took in the deepest breath she possibly could, and...

"DINNEEERRRR!" She even winced at how loud she was.

"Woops..." And back to the kitchen.

OoOoOo

"DINNEEERRRR!" Rang through Sasuke's ears.

'What the hell?'

He looked over. Kabuto had nearly fallen out of his tree.

OoOoOo

"DINNEEERRRR!"

Naruto fell over in shock. "What the HELL was that?"

Shikamaru scratched the back of his head. Kakashi raised a brow. Sai shrugged.

OoOoOo

"DINNEEERRRR!"

"SHIZUNE! WHAT IN THE HELLS WAS THAT?" The Hokage shrieked, clinging to her assistant.

Shizune shrugged.

OoOoOo

Within seconds, the gang of S-class criminals were seated.

Tobi clapped. "OOH! What is this, Miss Sakura?"

Sakura smiled. "My Sakura-Super-Ramen-Special! I used to make it as a congratulations dish, when I was in Konoha. Dig in and tell me what you think! I haven't made it in a while..."

Itachi glanced at her. "No good news in the Leaf?"

Sakura blinked, before replying, eyes cast down, "No, not really. Wars don't bring anyone happiness..."

'I see...' Itachi mused, breaking his chopsticks apart.

The rest did the same.

...

It was pretty heart-warming, watching the Akatsuki eat. Being a band of circus freaks, they each had some sort of new quality when they ate. Sakura noticed every single one of them.

Kisame and Hidan scarfed it down, making a huge mess. As compared to Zetsu, Itachi, and Pein. The men ate like birds. They took forever. Funny.

Sasori was still getting used to the whole idea of eating. Sakura would giggle every time he dropped the chopsticks from inexperience, and his cheeks would stain just a bit. Cute.

Deidara had a look of complete bliss on his face, seemingly greatful just for the invention of chopsticks; a better way to keep your hand-mouths from stealing your food. Hilarious.

Kakuzu occasionally got noodles mixed up with stitches, and would wince just barely every time he stretched one of them. Very un-Kakuzu-like, but still. Adorable.

Tobi, oddly enough, poured the noodles through the hole in his mask. Ha-ha.

Konan was obviously the most normal of the group. Believe it or not. True-ness...

"So then, yeah...why aren't you eating?" Deidara asked, already finished.

Everyone paused and looked fron Deidara to Sakura.

Sakura giggled-jeez, she has got to stop doing that. "It's okay, I had enough tasting it before I set it out for you guys. Quite frankly, I think you're all pretty stupid for thinking that I wouldn't poison your food."

Sasori and Itachi's eyes in particular shot open about as wide as they could go, while the rest of their jaws dropped.

Sakura full-out laughed, this time. "I'm only playing with you. The food is safe. I'm sure Ita-san and Saso-kun would have noticed it first, anyway~"

Sakura sent them both a seductive smile. When their eyes widened just a bit more, she laughed again. Even more so when she heard Deidara and Hidan choke. Waving them off, Sakura turned and left to her room.

She paused and turned back smiling. "Oh, and Kisame-kun? Because I did your job for you, you're cleaning up. Ta!"

Kisame looked about the mess that had been made at the table. He groaned, head hanging.

OoOoOo

Though Sakura didn't exactly trust the information just yet, she had been told that the entire Akatsuki liked her, had she not?

So, add an alluring suffix to their name, and they'll do anything for you. It's total payback for making her put up with their crap.

Sakura smirked. 'Maybe this will be fun.'

OoOoOo

Yay! Longer than I expected!

...really long, actually. I think.

I am SO sorry for updating so late. I love you. I promise.

Deidara: You're a creeper, yeah.

Shut up!

OH MAH JASHIN! YOUR BIRTHDAY IS IN TWO DAYS! ON THE 5th!

...just thought I'd get that out there.

Oh, one more thing! I never remember disclaimers, and no one reminds me. I don't like putting author notes at the beginning, so here you go.

Will someone with red eyes, black hair, insomnia, a homicidal sibling, and a family-killing fetish PLEASE do the one and only disclaimer? Please?

Itachi: Fine. Hazuki-san does not own Naruto. All rights and characters go to Masashi Kishimoto-sensei. This applies to all future chapters. She does, however, own Deidara and Shikamaru plushies.

Ah! Shut up! No one was supposed to know! But I'm getting Zetsu and Sakura next!(plushies)

'Til next time!

~Raven100