The sand was cold and wet between Tara's toes as she and Jax walked along the beach in the moonlight. The park was closed so they were alone, and technically trespassing, but Tara didn't care. She had much bigger things to worry about. In one hand, she carried her shoes, her feet aching from an entire day in high heels. Her other hand was wrapped tightly around Jax's arm, her face pressed against the soft leather of his kutte.
"What's wrong?" he asked, sensing her tension. Where should she start? She'd just watched her best friend- her only friend, really, get married at 17, which got her thinking about the future. Try as she might, she couldn't see anything beyond what was right in front of her: her boyfriend in a SAMCRO kutte.
"Nothing," she murmured. Jax stopped, turning to face her. He wasn't going to let it go that easily. "Everything," she admitted, her eyes fixed on the bouquet Jax was carrying for her- the one she'd caught at the wedding.
Jax's brow furrowed. "I thought we had a good time?"
"We did," Tara insisted. How could she explain to Jax that when him being in the club was just a theory, that was one thing, but now that it was a reality, it terrified her? How could she tell him that she felt like she was being ripped in two? One half of her still wanted the future she'd always planned on- to go away to college and study to become a doctor, while the other half of her now wanted a life like Donna's- to marry Jax and stay in Charming, his old lady and the mother of his children
"Ohhhh," Jax smiled, coming to a sudden realization. "It's the kutte, isn't it? You're freaked out about me becoming a prospect." How did he know? Tara looked up at him, her lower lip trembling. "Babe, don't worry. I'll still have plenty of time for you." Tara opened her mouth to correct Jax's misconception, but something stopped her.
Jax looked at his kutte with such pride. The club was his future. He'd always known that, and so had Tara. Who was she to start questioning it now?
"In fact," Jax said, sliding the kutte off his shoulders, "I'll show you just how easily I can be pulled in another direction…with the right motivation." Tara watched in stunned silence as Jax tossed his kutte haphazardly into the sand, then began unbuttoning his dress shirt. She had a sudden urge to reach out and touch him, the way she always did when he disrobed. She refrained.
"Jax, what are you doing?" she whispered. As his shirt landed atop his kutte, he slid off his shoes, then his socks. "Jax!" He said nothing, but offered Tara a devilish grin as he unbuckled his belt and let his black slacks fall to his feet. As he stood in the dark, almost completely nude, he'd never looked more beautiful. Tara drank in the sight of him, still in total disbelief that he was hers.
"Let's go swimmin'," he said, removing his boxer shorts, then racing into the black water. He let out a loud, carefree whoop as he submerged himself up to his waist. Tara surveyed their surroundings. She didn't see or hear anyone other than her boyfriend, splashing around naked in the lake like a maniac. "Come on!" he yelled. "Whatcha waitin' for?!"
Tara laughed nervously, shaking her head. "I can't!" she protested.
"Sure ya can!" Jax argued. The water skimmed his waistline, barely covering him. If he was trying to entice her, he was succeeding. She took a step closer, the waves lapping at her toes.
"This is crazy!" she hissed. "Get out of there!" Jax shook his head, laughing.
"No way. The water's awesome. Come on, babe, live a little!" Jax held his hands out to Tara. She crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. "Please?" Jax stuck out his lower lip, pouting.
Tara laughed. "Not happening, Teller."
"Alright," Jax countered. "Then how about just a little tease?"
"Jax, no!"
"You're right, I'm sorry. I know you're not very adventurous." Tara scowled. She knew Jax was baiting her, but she couldn't resist. She hated nothing more than being called boring or straight-laced. And Jax knew it. She swept her eyes across the landscape once more, making sure they were alone. When she was satisfied that nobody else was around, she reached a hand behind her back and unzipped her bridesmaid dress, just enough.
She let the straps slide slowly down her shoulders. The dress slipped to her navel. She held it at her waist, her cheeks turning pink as Jax admired her. He smiled, then pitched dramatically backward, pretending to faint. Tara laughed, watching the ripples fan out across the dark water, waiting for Jax to reappear. He didn't. Nearly a minute later, he still hadn't.
"Jax?!" Tara called out frantically, searching the dark horizon for him. "Jax!" She shoved her dress down to her ankles and stumbled as she tried to step out of it, running into the lake in only her bra and panties. "Jax!" Her heart was in her throat as she dove under the water right around where she'd last seen him. Nothing but darkness. She flailed about, reaching her arms and legs as far as she could in every direction, hoping to feel him, trying not to panic. She held her breath for as long as she could, but eventually had to go up to the surface for air.
"I knew I'd get ya out here." Tara spun around, coming face to face with Jax, who was treading water calmly nearby, an amused look on his face.
"Jax!" she screamed, wrapping her arms around him in relief. He ran his hands up and down her sides, under the water, sliding his thumbs under the waistband of her panties as he began to remove them. "Why did you do that to me?" Tara demanded. Jax chuckled. With a loud slap, Tara's hand connected with Jax's cheek, surprising them both. Jax pulled away, stunned. Tara covered her mouth with her stinging hand.
She felt like she should apologize, but she wasn't sorry. So instead, she started laughing- nervously at first, then louder. Jax stared at her, wide-eyed, as if she'd gone insane. Then he rubbed his cheek with his hand and smiled.
"Guess I earned that one," he conceded. Tara laughed harder, making it impossible for Jax to not join in. "I didn't mean to scare you," he finally said, pulling her toward him. His hands moved smoothly down her sides and up under her bra as he kissed her. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"Me too," she breathed, nibbling on his lower lip as she wrapped her legs around his waist, unencumbered by gravity in the water. As they made love, Tara could think about nothing other than how good Jax felt inside her. They were young, reckless, in love...nothing else mattered. She was so lost in the moment, she didn't care who was watching. If she had, she might have noticed the flashing red and blue lights in the parking lot, and the uniformed figure approaching.
"I am so sorry, babe," Jax lamented. Tara couldn't see him, but she could hear them. They'd been arrested by Police Chief Unser for trespassing and indecent exposure, and detained in separate holding cells. Tara was in jail. In. Jail. And it was all Jax's fault. Still, all she wanted was for him to be able to hold her, to tell her everything would be okay. "Gemma and Clay will be here soon," he promised.
"Awesome," Tara grumbled. As if she wasn't humiliated enough. She laid back on the uncomfortable cot in her very small cell, trying not to think about the germs that were probably crawling all over it. She closed her eyes, hoping to convince herself that it was all a bad dream. Just as she was starting to drift off, she was awoken by a familiar voice.
"Oh, Jesus Christ." Gemma. Tara jumped up, relieved and terrified at the same time. Gemma was pissed. Clay stood beside her looking tired and slightly annoyed, but otherwise amused. As Jax's mother looked Tara up and down, her eyes narrowed. Tara imagined she looked like a drowned rat, her black dress dirty and caked with sand, her hair wet and tangled, makeup running down her face. "Are you alright?" Gemma asked softly.
Surprised by the usually abrasive woman's sudden kindness, Tara wasn't sure how to answer. "I…I think so."
Gemma turned to her son in the neighboring cell. "What the hell were you thinkin', Jackson? How dumb can you be?" Tara couldn't decide whether she was upset or relieved that Gemma blamed Jax for what happened. She was glad to not have to face the SAMCRO matriarch's wrath herself, but hated hearing her yell at Jax.
"We'll talk about this at home," Clay cautioned his wife, not wanting her to make a scene. He turned sleepily to the Police Chief. "Alright, Wayne, you made your point. We'll keep the juvenile delinquents in line."
Wayne Unser nodded, unlocking Jax's cell door without a word. He began to walk away, but Jax stopped him.
"My girl?" he demanded. Wayne ignored Jax, turning to Gemma.
"Let her go, Wayne," Gemma ordered, her hands on her hips. Unser shook his head.
"No can do, I'm afraid." His voice was scratchy, strained. Tara wondered if it had always been that way, or if it was because of his job. She imagined cops probably yelled a lot.
"The hell you talkin' about?" Gemma's voice got louder, and seemed to echo inside Tara's aching head.
"She's still a minor, Gem," Wayne explained carefully. "I can only release her to a family member." Tara's family consisted of exactly one person. Her chest began to ache. Jax's annoyed smirk turned into a look of confusion. Clay hung his head, letting out an exasperated sigh. He knew what was coming next.
Gemma's eyes turned dark as she took a step toward the Police Chief, who Tara could tell was more to her than just a cop. A friend? That would be an odd friendship. "We are her family. You know that," she said. Her words weren't threatening, but her tone definitely was.
Unser took a step back, trying to escape Gemma's pointed finger, which was about two inches from his nose. "Sorry, Gemma," he said. "My hands are tied." He turned to Tara. "Your dad's on his way, kid."
Tara's stomach twisted into knots as she backed away from the cell door. She would almost rather just stay in jail forever than have to see her father. It had been months.
"Tara," Jax whispered, swallowing hard. "I'm sorry." Gemma stalked after Wayne, still arguing, with Clay following behind her like the dutiful bodyguard he was. "I'm gonna stay right here with you. I promise."
"Jax," Clay called over his shoulder as he made his way toward the door. "Let's go."
Jax wrapped his hands around the bars to Tara's cell, planting his feet on the ground. "No. I'm staying."
Clay froze. His eyes went from sleepy to fiery in a split second, his posture from slumped to intimidating.
"Prospect," he growled. "Now." That one little word held so much power. It was like an invisible noose wrapped around Jax's neck, pulling him against his will.
"I'm sorry," he whispered again, hanging his head as he left her alone in the jail cell he'd put her in.
Tara stood silently beside the familiar stranger as he signed a barrage of paperwork at Chief Unser's desk. He hadn't said a word to her, or even made eye contact. He smelled slightly of booze, but it wasn't overpowering the way Tara was used to. He'd no doubt had a couple in recent hours, but he wasn't drunk. At least not yet.
"You got a ride?" he asked without looking at her as she followed him out of the police station, her head down. Tara searched the darkness for Gemma's car or Jax's bike. She didn't see either.
"Yeah," she lied. Sean Knowles nodded, then turned toward the parking lot. Tara exhaled deeply, trying to stave off the tears as she watched her father go. Just before he got into his car, he stopped. He turned to her, his eyes glassy. Tara told herself it was because of the alcohol, but she knew better.
"Are you doin' alright, kid?" he asked. Tara nodded, unable to speak. She smiled, trying to sell it, as her chin quivered. "Good." Without another word, he climbed into his sleek black Oldsmobile and started the engine. It was a wonder he hadn't totaled the thing, as many times as he'd driven it drunk.
He began to pull out of the parking lot, then paused, just inches from where Tara was standing. He leaned over and rolled down the passenger side window while Tara watched him silently.
"By the way," he added, "Happy Birthday."
Tara cleared her throat. "It's not my…" her father tapped his finger on his dashboard clock. 12:27 am. Tara was officially seventeen. And her dad remembered her birthday. "Thanks," she corrected herself, her voice barely a whisper.
"Guess you're all grown up now, huh?" Before Tara could answer, her father pulled away from the curb and out of the parking lot. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she watched his taillights disappear into the darkness.