A/N I've had a lot of people PM me about Happy. In my world, he's already a member of the Redwood Charter. Sorry if that was confusing because it's supposed to be pre-season 1. Thanks for all the support and feedback. I'm glad people are reading it! :) An on with Chapter 6!

"This was one of those things"

Chibs came in when I was contemplating how to go about things. I needed to read the letter, but the pull to find Gemma was growing stronger with every breath I took.

"Jackie Boy. She's not there. Any luck in here?"

"Not quite. Piney said she took off an hour ago saying she was leaving for a while. Left this for me. Read it." I handed Chibs the envelope. I didn't know if I could read it right now. Chibs is less involved and more level headed then I am at this moment.

He opened it and read the note. It was quick, but the look on his face was haunting.

"We need to find Gemma. Now. Read it then we'll go." Chibs said.

I reluctantly took the note from Chibs slightly shaking hand.

Jackson,
I see the end, there's no return
I can't turn back, the hate will burn
The doors are open, the end is near
I am not scared, I do not fear.

You're too much like John.I'm sorry.

What the fuck does all of that even mean? The hate will burn? So was Tara right? Mo mother really had something to do with her being kidnapped and beaten? My mother would be long gone by now….Clay. Did he know? Either way, he will know now. I got out my prepay and called Opie.

"Op, get everyone to the clubhouse ASAP. Ask Donna to stay with Tara please. I need everyone else here."

"Okay, be there shortly." Op, straight to the point.

I sat at the bar and picked up the bottle of tequila Piney had nursed, but since abandoned. I stared at the wood top of the bar. There were dents and nicks all over the surface. Some spots had lost its shine, and there were cigarette burns. It's weird how something so insignificant can be representative of my life to me. I identified with the dents and nicks because of my imperfections as a man. I've killed other men before. The dents and nicks leave holes in the surface, and I feel as though I lose a little of my soul every time I take another man's life. Whether he deserved it or not. The parts that have lost their shine are representative of the condition of my spirit since Tara had left me. I'm not as happy or as care free as I used to be. Tara evened me out. She complemented me quite effectively. And lastly, the burns in the top I immediately associate with the fiery burn in my heart and in my stomach. The burn of betrayal. My own mother. My flesh and blood has done something that directly affects me and in turn affects the club. I can't shake the bad feelings that I get when I think about what happens when one betrays the club. SAMCRO deals with it one day.

Death.

God, could I possibly be thinking of killing my mother? I don't know if I'm capable of that. I don't know if another brother could either. I'm getting ahead of myself. My mother didn't attack Tara, some man did. But she still had something to do with it. She was guilty of something, but what? The punishment would be defined by the actions taken.

When I thought of my mother being guilty I remembered she said I was too much like John. What would JT have to do with this? He had a lot of heart. He put it all into the club and was dedicated to his family as much as his club. He was a member of the first 9. He wanted the club to be a legitimate motorcycle club. No guns, no illegal shit. Well not huge illegal shit. The morale of the club was low because not everyone agrees with how Clay handles things. I found his manuscript and have attempt to confront Clay with ideas for legit business ventures. John went to the club with alternatives shortly before he died. Was that what happened?

I was cut off by my might have been epiphany by someone shaking my shoulders.

"Jax. Hey, come on. What's up with you Brother? I've been calling your name for two minutes. Everyone is in chapel. Time to tell us what the hell has you so fucked up." Opie, my brother of many sorts knew something was wrong. I'm glad he had gotten out of prison and decided to come back to the club. I needed a solid force by my side.

I grabbed the bottle of tequila, the note, and walked to chapel with a purpose. I would expose my mother, and question Clay. As an old lady, Gemma didn't do anything without Clay's permission. Not if she wanted to live through the day.

When I walked in, all the men were in they're appointed spots. No one was talking but everyone wanted to. I looked around at my brothers and though about who would be on my side after learning the truth. Would anyone help me in my pursuit of justice for Tara?

My eyes fell first on Clay. There's no way he'd approve. Next to my empty seat was Bobby. He'd be a wild card. He'd want justice, but would probably help find the man that was responsible, not Gemma. No one knows what the hell Juice think half the time. Happy, the Man of Mayhem, would be on my side. He's all about making things right, not about feelings. Piney would learn towards Op and I, but wouldn't like it. Opie and Chibs were solidly on my side. And lastly there was Tig. He would do as Clay says. He's a loyal lap dog, without the benefits of humping his owners legs.

I made it to my seat and Clay began to speak. "Wanna tell us why you called us all here? To Chapel no less." I looked to Piney.

"Gemma's gone." Piney said.

"What do you mean she's gone? She go home?" Bobby asked.

"No, not home. She's gone. She ran away. She's guilty of something and we need to find out what. I'm voting to find Gemma. Not hurt her, but talk to her." I replied as evenly as I could.

"Where's the proof huh? You wanna go after your mom? Show me the proof." Clay was growing angry. Instead of passing the note around, I read it aloud to them. I tried to keep my voice as void of emotion as possible.

Everyone was confused by the poem. They knew something wasn't right though.

"Shit!" Clay slammed his hands down. Either he knew something else or was in denial about the situation before now.

"We really have to vote on this? Now you know the proof. She's guilty of something." I just wanted to get out of here as soon as possible.

"Of course it goes to a vote. Majority wins."

It was silent for a minute, giving everyone time to process the news and make a decision. After about five minutes, Clay started.

"I do not approve. Nay." Clay voted.

"Yay." My vote

Next was Bobby, the wild card. "Jax, this is Gemma. Your mom. I'm sorry. Nay." I nodded at him.

Juice also voted negative.

Happy was straight to the point with his vote. "I want answers. Yay."

The nays were ahead by one vote. I was getting anxious about Piney. He didn't look up at me. He just stared at the table.

"Nay." My heart dropped. My plan would fall through because of a crazy old man with sentimental history with my mother.

Opie was stunned too. He stared directly as his father when he voted. "I'm with you Jax. Yay"

Chibs was next. "Sorry, I've got to back my VP. Yay."

We all turned to look at Tig who seemed to be having a silent conversation with Clay. I was screwed. There's a minute fraction of a chance that Tig would side against Clay. I started to surrender after Piney opted out. Now I was waving a white flag. I wouldn't let it go, but I'd have to do it without the clubs support. I've gone against the club before, what's one more thing?

"Tig, your decision?" I asked impatiently.

"Fuck, I'm sorry man." I hung my head in defeat. "It's a yay."

"What?!" Clay and I asked simultaneously.

"I'm sorry Clay. Something ain't right. Jax said he'd find her not kill her. He'll be held accountable for his actions. As is Gemma. This is the way it should be. You're just too proud to admit it because she's your old lady." Looks like someone's sleeping outside tonight.

"The yays have it." Clay slammed his gavel down hard on the table. I got up and Opie, Chibs, and Happy followed suit.

"Jax." Clay called to me. "You get your cut back when Gemma's home safe."

Happy and Opie offered to come with me. "Nah, I'll go alone or take Chibs. Happy, you gotta stay here and help deal with the Irish in a couple days. Op, I need you to be the eyes and ears at the hospital. You also need to keep Donna sane. She's going to become edgy and things will get hectic. Don't keep her out of the loop. Let her in, Op. Help each other." I hugged him when I said this. "I'm riding to Gemma's house. Chibs, you coming?"

"Definitely brotha."

When we got to Gemma's, her Escalade was in the driveway, but the house was dark. Chibs went to the front door, I went through the back. We met up in the living room.

"No sign of her, but she packed a bag before she left. Things were strewn on the bed and floor and she took some stuff from the bathroom. She didn't take her car, how how did she get out of town? A cab maybe?" Chibs questioned.

I thought for a moment. Would Gemma take a cab? It would make sense. They wouldn't ask any questions. Then it clicked. I know someone else who wouldn't ask any questions.

"Come on. We're going to the station."

:) The poem Gemma left for Jax was something I had written in high school. It seems as though it was destined to be put into another work of literature! Hope you guys liked it!

TempeTempe.