AN: So I'm just sitting here at the neighbours' place, babysitting, stuffing myself with chips and crying as I read all the tweets about Willemijn's final performance, which has just ended... and I decided I might as well post a new chapter.

The song in the previous chapter was 'You Are So Beautiful' by Joe Cocker.

Also, since the only thing that helps me stop crying over Willemijn right now seems to be Fiyeraba fluff, and I got inspired by a song earlier today... look out for a cute one-shot.

Chapter 17. Letting go

"Yero?" Elphaba asked some time after that. They had eaten dinner in silence, both of them still thinking about their earlier conversation; and now they were sitting on the couch in front of the fire, cuddled up against one another.

Fiyero planted a kiss on her hair. "Yes, sweetheart?"

She sat up a little straighter. "Why did you turn that picture around?"

He followed her gaze. When he realised she meant the photograph of Aliyra, he swallowed with difficulty. He rose to his feet and grabbed the photograph, staring down at it for a moment before taking it back to Elphaba and showing it to her.

"Because," he said, his voice sounding a little strangled, "sometimes I just can't stand her looking at me… or me having to look at her."

The green girl next to him looked up at him with mild concern in her dark eyes and he sighed.

"Her name was Aliyra," he said quietly. "She died five years ago."

Elphaba placed a comforting hand on his arm.

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

He forced a smile and stared down at the picture for a moment longer before standing again and pushing it underneath a pile of papers on his desk, not elaborating on who the girl was or what exactly happened. After all this time, he still couldn't stand to talk about her.

Elphaba was watching him, but she did not say anything, and he did not bring it up again. Instead, he sat down beside her once more and pulled her into his arms, starting to rub her once again tense shoulders.

She sighed softly and leant back against him, and he smiled. "If it were up to me, you'd spend every night in my room," he whispered in her ear.

She twisted her head to the side to give him better access to her neck. "Galinda would never forgive me, though."

"Is that the only reason you won't consider it?" he teased as he slowly pulled the sleeves of her dress down, trailing his lips down her neck and planting a soft kiss on her shoulder before continuing to massage her neck and shoulders.

After a while, he lifted her up in his arms and carried her over to the bed, laying her down on her stomach so that he had better access to her back. He could feel her slowly relaxing beneath his hands and he smiled.

"Is this nice?"

"Nice?" She stretched like a cat, moaning softly when he worked out another kink in her back. "Oz, Fiyero, this is amazing. Don't stop."

He grinned wickedly, planting a kiss at the back of her neck, just above the collar of her blouse; and then another one on her lower back, below the hemline of the offending garment. Oz, he wished he could take that off. He allowed himself to indulge in the daydream for just a moment before shaking his head, forcing himself back to the present.

He stroked her back, watching her face as she murmured encouragements into his pillow.

"You are so beautiful," he whispered, kneading her stiff shoulders, "to me…"

She smiled.

He turned her around, so that she was lying on her back.

"You," he told her, "are amazing, Fae, in every way possible; and I'm going to do everything in my power to make you see that, too."

She sighed, shaking her head, even though she was smiling. "If you say so."

He could tell that she was trying to indulge him, so he pinned her down beneath him and tickled her sides, making her squirm and gasp for breath.

"You are," he told her firmly, "and I will, if it's the last thing I'll ever do."

Now her smile was a little sad. "Honestly, Fiyero…" She shook her head. "I don't think you're going to succeed."

She leant up to kiss him softly. "But thank you for trying."

He laced their fingers together and squeezed her hand, kissing her back. He ran his fingers through her hair, marvelling at the soft, silky feel of it, and played with the dark strands. She sighed happily and he peppered her face with kisses, smiling at the look on her face. For the umpteenth time, he wondered how she, along with practically the rest of Oz, couldn't see how beautiful she was. It was clear as day, really.

He ran his hands down her arms, stroking her hair and her back, and she snuggled up against him with a small yawn. He grinned at the adorable picture she made and he kissed her nose, causing her eyes to open.

"Let's go to sleep," he suggested.

She nodded, eyes already closing again. "'Night, Yero."

He pulled the blanket over them both and watched as she curled up on her side, her faced buried in his neck. He pressed a kiss to her hair and then allowed himself to start drifting off as well.

"'Night, Ali," he murmured.

He froze, immediately realising his mistake; but Elphaba hadn't heard. She was already fast asleep.

Five years, he reminded himself once again. You've got Elphaba now. It's time to let Aliyra go.

Promising himself that he would, he tried to reassure himself.

Still he did not fall asleep for hours, thoughts and memories running through his head that he just did not seem able to stop.

Fiyero walked Elphaba back to her dorm room the next morning, where the green girl spent the first half hour patiently answering all of Galinda's questions, before they were interrupted by a knock on the door. The visitor turned out to be Nessarose, completely in tears, who apologised profusely for everything she had said the day before.

"I was just upset because of Boq," she wept, "and then I got angry, but I didn't mean it, Fabala, really! I'm so sorry, will you please forgive me?"

Elphaba, of course, immediately did – much to Galinda and Fiyero's chagrin.

"If I were you, I would have made her squirm for a few more hours," said Galinda with a scowl.

"Or weeks," Fiyero muttered under his breath.

Galinda giggled, even as Elphaba threw him a warning look.

"What about Boq?" the dark-haired witch asked her younger sister, who immediately brightened.

"We made up," she said, beaming. "He apologised, and then I apologised, and then we agreed to go out for dinner tonight. We're back together!"

"I never thought I would say this," Elphaba said when the wheelchair-bound girl had left again, "but she is worse than Galinda."

Galinda crossed her arms indignantly. "Hey!"

"You once broke up with a boy because he accidentally called you 'Glinda'," Elphaba pointed out.

"It is my name! He ought to have known it by then!"

"You had known each other for barely six hours!"

Fiyero chuckled. "That does sound like you, Glin."

"And then when you were dating that other boy, just before Lurlinemas," Elphaba reminded her friend, "you and him broke up and got back together about four times in the one week you were dating."

Galinda giggled. "Okay, I see your point."

Elphaba pulled out a stack of books she would need for her classes and for studying today. "I'm glad Nessa came to apologise, though… even though she was right." She sighed.

"Hey." Fiyero tilted her chin up, looking into her eyes. "What did I tell you yesterday?" he asked pointedly.

She chuckled weakly. "I know, Fiyero. Believe me, I know." She shook her head. "But this… what Nessa said… it's what I have been believing my whole life long. You know that. Everyone always told me these things, and… and I know you mean well, and you want to help, but it's just not that easy."

"Don't give up," Galinda advised the prince in a stage whisper. "She's right – it's not so easy that you can get her to see her own amazifyingness in one night, but you'll get through to her eventually."

Fiyero grinned at the blonde.

"I know," he said. "She's stubborn, but I can be, too."

"I am right here, you know," said Elphaba, waving a hand. "Though maybe I should just get to class now and leave you to it, so that you can gossip about me without me overhearing everything."

"It's not gossiping!" Galinda protested, but Elphaba just raised an eyebrow at her and the blonde huffed.

"I'll walk you to class," Fiyero offered, not having class himself until the afternoon.

Galinda, however, shook her head and stepped up next to Elphaba.

"Oh, no," she declared. "Elphie has been neglecting me enough already lately and we weren't done talking yet. I am walking with her to class. Especially since I have to go to that same class, anyway."

"You're actually going?" Fiyero teased her, but his only reply was a glare.

He chuckled and kissed Elphaba. "Piano lesson tonight at eight?"

She smiled and nodded, and he kissed her again before leaving.

"Elphie," Galinda said in a whiny voice as they walked to class together, "I was serious, you know. Everything you do lately, you do with Fiyero. I miss you!"

"Glin, I'm right here!" Elphaba said. "We live in the same room!"

When she thought about it, though, she realised that the blonde was right. She could hardly even remember the last time she had done something nice with Galinda. It was always either just Elphaba and Fiyero or them and the entire group; and even then, they mostly paid attention to one another. She did see Galinda in their dorm room every day, but they hadn't really talked or done something together in a long time.

Feeling guilty, Elphaba quickly scribbled a note during the lecture and pushed it onto Galinda's table.

You're right. I'm sorry. Do you have plans on Saturday? I'll completely clear my schedule for you and we can go and do whatever you want.

She realised that did probably mean shopping, makeovers, or parties – or all three of them – but just this time, she decided to indulge Galinda and endure it for her sake.

When Galinda read the note, she positively beamed at Elphaba.

"Oh, Elphie, I'd love that!" she whispered loudly, squeezing her friend's arm. "Thank you!"

Elphaba squeezed back. "Sorry for neglecting you."

"It's fine, Elphie. We're going to have the most thrillifying time," Galinda declared. "I'll take you shopping, and then I'm going to give you a makeover… and maybe we could have lunch in town together, or go someplace fancy for dinner! Then we can dress up like fancy ladies!"

Elphaba obediently smiled and nodded. "That sounds like fun."

Her roommate giggled. "Oh, Elphie, you're so sweet. I'm only joking, you know. I know how much you hate shopping and fancy restaurants, after all." She looked at Elphaba. "How about we go and see a movie," she suggested, "then have lunch in town, and maybe we could do a tiny little bit of shopping afterwards, and have a nice dinner in town… and after that we'll go and get a drink at the Primrose Café and hang out there for a bit. Okay? And if you play it right," she leant towards her friend conspiratorially, "you might even drag me into a bookstore or two."

This time, Elphaba's smile was genuine. "You're amazing, Glin."

"I know," Galinda said with a giggle, tossing her hair. She grinned at Elphaba. "You're not so bad yourself."

The weeks passed slowly, with nothing special happening, which Elphaba was rather glad about. She kept herself busy with her studies, with Galinda – whom she was careful not to neglect again – and with Fiyero, and she was happy. Their relationship was going well, much to her own surprise. She kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, but so far, nothing had happened yet… which could not be said for Nessarose and Boq, who seemed to break up and get back together again every other week.

When Elphaba met Fiyero in his room one night, he was sitting on the couch, grinning at her like an idiot as she came in.

"Okay," she said suspiciously, slowly approaching him. "What's up with you?"

He chuckled. "I got a letter from my parents today," he said.

She sank down onto the couch next to him. "Okay… and why does that make you so happy?" she asked. Fiyero and his parents wrote back and forth at least once a week – him having received a letter from the Vinkun king and queen was not really anything special.

"Because," he said, beaming at her, "they have invited you to come over for summer break. You can come home to the Vinkus with me, Fae! That way, we don't have to spend the summer apart!"

He was positively glowing, looking at her expectantly, and her heart broke.

"Yero…" she said quietly, and his face fell.

"That doesn't sound good," he said, trying to make a joke of it, but his smile was forced. "What's wrong? Don't you want to spend the vacation with me?"

"Of course I do!" Elphaba assured him quickly. "That's not it at all!"

Fiyero, however, was looking hurt. "What is it, then?"

She sighed, her shoulders slumping. "I… I just can't," she said quietly. "Father would never let me, Fiyero. I have to go home and take care of Nessa."

"I'll invite Nessa, too, then!" he tried desperately. "And your father… please, Fae!"

"I'll ask him," said Elphaba. "But I already know he's not going to allow me to go. I'm sorry, Fiyero. I'd love to come to the Vinkus with you, I really would, but I can't."

He nodded stiffly. "It's okay," he said. "I understand."

She looked up at him, noticing the way he had set his jaw and the look in his eyes, and she sighed.

"You're mad at me."

"Of course not," he said rather harshly. "It's not like you can help it."

She kept on looking at him until he caved.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, looking down in shame. "It's just… I'm just disappointed. I've kind of been planning everything out in my head already, making a list of everything I want to show you and do with you, the people I want you to meet…"

She took his hand.

"It was a great idea, Yero," she said softly. "Thank you for asking your parents."

He gave her a half-smile. She wrapped her arms around him, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"I was already looking forward to it," he said sadly. "I could show you the gardens at my home, and the library… and I wanted you to meet my parents…" He sighed.

"I would have loved to see it all," she said, "and to meet your family, Yero… but we'll get our chance." She raised her head to look at him. "Maybe," she said a bit hesitantly, "maybe if I plead with him, he'd let me go for a few weeks… I'll ask Nessa if she wants to come as well – if she asks Father, we might have a chance."

Fiyero brightened at that. "You could try that," he agreed eagerly. "I could invite Boq and Galinda, too – then you two will have an escort from Munchkinland, and Nessa won't be lonely if you and I spend a lot of time together…"

Elphaba smiled and kissed him.

"I'll ask Father," she promised.