Let's see… Where do I want to go with this chapter? Not really sure, actually – I had writer's block for a while and then that went away, but something else came up, so I haven't put much thought into it… I've been trying for weeks to update it, but every time I went to work on it, I ended up putting all my effort into other stuff and running out of time – now that this is updated, I've got to worry about "Letters from Spain"…
I've actually been toying with the idea of killing another person off (because it leads to a reoccurring thing in the plot) but I think it's a little soon. I'll have to see what happens.
The plot's probably going to get somewhat twisted around and weird from this point, just like "Letters From Spain", and… Well, it will definitely be weird.
Now, before I get to the story, I want to take a moment to address an issue that came up in the country recently – MRSA outbreaks. I keep hearing about it on the news, and I fail to understand why it's only come to attention now, when the actual outbreak problem started at least two years ago. I want everyone to be careful, because this is a potentially lethal disease. It's usually contracted by people with weakened immune systems (which is why you find it in nursing homes), although having surgery and open wounds are also factors, and some people who are infected don't actually develop symptoms (nurses tend to become carriers). It's most often spread through contact with the mucus membranes (the nose and eyes). The best course of action is to follow good hygiene procedures, wash your hands often, avoid rubbing your eyes or nose with your hands after contact with anything people handle a lot, and if you have an open wound be sure to clean it thoroughly often. I saw and had to work around numerous people with MRSA in the hospital where I interned, and I know how serious the disease is – it really hits you the first time you see one of those oozing, ulcerated abscesses in real life. I've been up close and personal with it; quite literally, if you count the microbiologist that kept sticking petri dishes full of MRSA bacteria in my face. A lot of people probably think it could never happen to them, but I know how real that possibility is, and I want everyone to keep that in mind. I'm going to post this in a few of my stories to spread the word, so if you read more than one of my stories, sorry for the repetition.
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Chapter Four: The Munchies
The group had entered a somewhat cramped hallway/room-type thing that had been decorated by someone with questionable sanity. The wallpaper looked as though it had been made by getting a bunch of people sick with food poisoning, and there was no question that the way the colors clashed with the hardwood floor and railing was a bit hard on the eyes. Lynn had since calmed down a little bit, but she was now twitching uncontrollably like a nervous wreck, and eerily silent.
The others, still rather indifferent about the scene they had just witnessed, paid her no mind at all.
"These doors are both locked. I guess we're heading downstairs or something," Jill said, and Alex piped up.
"Well, the only other way to go is through the window."
"That sounds like a legitimate idea," Petshez said, but Jill stopped him.
"Don't even consider it. I think you running into the doors was bad enough," and then added under her breath, "Idiot."
"What?"
"Nothing. Let's hope that there's none of those monsters down there."
"Oh, there will be. You know it," Lynn murmured, and Brian gave her a funny look, tapping Alex on the shoulder.
"What's her problem?"
"How the hell should I know?"
"You're her best friend."
"So? It's not like I can read her mind."
He stared at her. "Why don't you just ask her?"
Alex thought. And she thought some more. "Nah."
As soon as they went down the stairs, a zombie Doberman jumped through the window. It ran around for a second, while they tried to run for the nearest door, and then cornered the twitching Lynn on the last step, staring at her.
"Just kill me," she said miserably, right before the dog jumped on her… And began humping her leg. "God, get it off! I wanted to die, not this!"
Jill came back over, shot it… and then began laughing at her despite the suicidal comment.
"Yeah, ha ha. How funny," Lynn grumbled, getting up and joining the group in the small room next to the stairs.
"Ooh, a bed!" Petshez said happily, throwing himself onto the mattress… And bouncing right back off, landing on the floor with a loud THUD! "Ouch… That's one springy mattress…"
"Let me try!" said Brian, jumping onto the bed, bouncing off and landing right on Petshez.
"Brian… I think you just ruptured my liver…"
"I wish someone would rupture my liver," Lynn murmured, and everyone collectively gave her a funny look. "What?"
"Why do you think there are typewriters all over this place?" Jill asked suddenly, poking a few keys on the typewriter in the corner and typing the word 'Ass'. "The guy who owns this place is rich – you would think he could afford computers."
"Maybe he just doesn't like the people here enough to give them decent technology," Alex said, picking through stuff on the shelf. "Antiv en om? What is that?"
"Don't you mean anti-venom?" Jill questioned, raising an eyebrow at her.
"Whatever. I can't read."
"You can't read? How did you get this far in school?"
"Luck?"
"Or maybe the school just doesn't pay attention to actual learning ability," Brian added, and Alex tackled him.
"Oh, come on, come on, people! No fighting," Petshez said, finally getting off the floor. "Violence doesn't solve anything."
"Fighting solves everything," Lynn said quietly, idly rearranging a bouquet of herbs she'd been gathering along the way.
Everyone stopped what they were doing, looking at her like she had twelve heads.
"She is really beginning to creep me out," Alex said, and the others nodded in agreement.
"I'm sure Lynn will be fine – she just needs some love!" Petshez said, ever encouraging.
"Well, there's a bed right there," Brian answered matter-of-factly.
"Brian, I didn't mean that kind of love. Get your mind out of the gutter."
"Don't bother. That's where his body will end up when he dies," Alex piped in.
"Everyone will die here," Lynn said, gripping the stems of the herbs so tight that they crunched. "All and sundry will meet their end in this massive death trap."
"… That's it, I'm getting out of here," Jill said simply, arming herself and heading for the door in a hurry. The others followed, and they continued into the hall, that is, until two more Dobermans jumped through the windows. "It just never ends."
The one dog sat down, raising a paw to his chin contemplatively. "Bark, woof ruff?"
"He just asked if, figuratively, anything ever ends," Petshez explained, and the group looked back and forth from the dog to the teacher.
"Bark bark woof bark."
"He's babbling about something in quantum physics involving putting a destroyed building back together particle by particle."
They had no idea what was weirder – Petshez talking to a zombie dog, or a dog talking about physics.
"Um… We should really be going…" Jill began inching for the door.
"Ruff. Bark woof woof ruff, grr."
"He says that's fine, but he and his friend are hungry, and they were really expecting a dinner of living human flesh."
"Why does it have to be living, though? Couldn't they just eat other zombies? Or hunt small animals?" Brian questioned.
"Woof bark ruff ruff woof."
"They don't like eating other zombies as much because their flesh is cold. They want warm food. And they don't feel like hunting."
"What if we got them food? Would that make up for it?" Jill posed, and the dog thought.
"Bark."
"That's a yes."
"We'll be back soon," Jill promised, and hurried the group through the unlocked door into another badly decorated green room.
"What are you going to feed them?" Petshez asked.
"One of us," Lynn said darkly, and they chose to ignore her.
"I don't know – maybe we can find something to heat up. Like we'll be going back that way, anyway."
A small group of zombies ambled around, slowly making their way towards them, as Jill picked them off one by one. The threat gone, they headed for a nearby door, wanting to get away from the horrible wallpaper they were being subjected to looking at.
Jill unlocked the door with her lockpick, and they found themselves in a bedroom that smelled strongly of something unpleasant, although they couldn't put their fingers on what.
"Ahh, this is comfy," Petshez said, lying on the bed in the middle of the room.
Jill went towards a small desk in the corner after spotting a journal on it, while Alex looked at the books on the bookcase, Brian dug through the owner's dresser and Lynn did nothing but stare grimly at the wall.
"The guy who lived in this room was apparently a gamekeeper… And had some trust issues…" Jill said, paging through the diary, "Evidently there was some sort of virus leak somewhere and they made him wear a haz-mat suit until he developed some weird, really itchy rash and blisters… Eww… He had a rotting sore on his arm?"
"Mmm," Lynn said, taking a deep breath and then coughing. "Ugh, that smell is horrible."
"What is that, anyway?" Alex asked, glancing around the room for a source.
"Maybe some really rancid cologne," Brian suggested, throwing a pile of shirts onto the floor. "He sure seems to have enough of it stashed away in this drawer…"
"This guy sounds really sick. I wonder if he caught the virus…" Jill said pensively, turning the page. "Huh? It jumps ahead a few days… And his grammar skills went completely to hell."
"Maybe he was feverish?" Alex offered, and the woman shook her head.
"No, he says his fever's gone… And he ate dog food…"
"Dog food? Who is he, Shaggy from Scooby Doo?" Brian laughed.
"He killed somebody… Oh damn, this is freaking me out… The last entry is dated '4' and says 'Itchy. Tasty.'."
"Uh… That's pretty creepy," Petshez said, and Jill turned around to face them, only now realizing where the teacher was.
"Petshez, get off that bed! It's probably infested with the virus!"
"AHH!" shrieked Petshez, leaping off the bed and flailing around. "Oh God, oh God, oh, God!"
"As far as I know, most viruses don't survive terribly long outside of the body," Lynn said apathetically, "They need a host… Although an audio book I heard suggested someone caught Ebola from a cave…"
Petshez calmed down momentarily, just to start flipping out again when a zombie abruptly burst from the walk in closet beside the bed. To everyone's surprise – except Petshez's because he was freaking out too much to notice – the zombie looked exactly like, no, was Shaggy from Scooby Doo.
"Hey… Duuuudes…" he said. "I've, like, got the munchies…"
"Get me the fuck out of here now!" Lynn said, backing into the door in alarm.
"Got any Scooby Snacks?" he questioned, getting closer to Jill.
"Get away, get away!" she shouted, gingerly pushing him away and wiping her hands on her pants frantically.
"What's wrong, guuuuys? I just want to hang out… Have a bite to eat…"
They collectively shuddered.
"Let's get out of here!" Alex yelled, heading for the door immediately.
Alex, Lynn and Petshez bolted from the room, while Brian picked through the drawers even faster, until Jill grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out into the main room.
Unfortunately, Shaggy followed them, and since they didn't know where else to go because they hadn't explored the area any further, they ran back into the area where the dogs were.
The two dogs sat up expectantly, looking at them funny as if to ask 'what the hell are you doing?'.
"Um, um, I have an idea," Brian announced, trying to think quickly. He stuffed a handkerchief into a cologne bottle he had swiped, and looked around desperately. "I need a lighter or something!"
The dog that had been silent the entire time they'd been around suddenly pulled out a lighter, holding it up for Brian to light the cloth and then lighting itself a cigarette.
The group was too engrossed in watching the door to notice the dog puffing away, and blowing smoke rings.
Shaggy threw the door open, a stupid smile spreading across his warped, decayed face. "Ready for a snack, guuuys? I think that would be tasty…"
Brian threw the makeshift Molotov cocktail in his hand, and it hit Shaggy directly, setting the zombie hippie on fire.
As if prompted by Pavlov's bell, the two Dobermans exchanged looks, and then attacked Shaggy, chomping on his charred, warm flesh, one with the cigarette still in it's mouth.
The group hurriedly went back into the green room they had been in, standing around in a disorganized circle, trying to catch their breath and gather their thoughts.
"That," said Lynn, having briefly snapped out of her suicidal guise, "Was the scariest thing I've ever seen."
Petshez was too freaked out to speak.
Brian picked through some items that seemed valuable, trying to take his mind off it. "Who knew Shaggy would work for a pharmaceutical company?"
Alex shivered. "Who knows what else is hanging around this place…"
"Death, my friends," Lynn said, "It's all around us. It could strike at any moment."
"Let's just hope there are no more undead hippies and people from TV shows, or something," Jill said, composing herself. "The last thing I'd want to see would be zombie Bob Barker."
She looked around, feeling the dread of the unknown setting in worse than ever. Her head starting to ache just from thinking of it, she pulled out a bottle of aspirin and popped the lid, looking at the pills… as they suddenly began to talk to her in unison.
"It's approaching… Oh, what tumult, turmoil, turbulence…"
She chucked the bottle across the room, the pills scattering everywhere and falling silent. The others looked at her hesitantly, and she shrugged.
"Let's get a move on, before we completely lose our minds."
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That was kind of scary, even to me! Proof reading it, I feel like I must have been high, or something… Actually, I have the flu, so that might explain why it's so bizarre. I have been having really strange, borderline-disturbing dreams since I got sick…
With the whole Shaggy thing, I happened to be going through old memos I wrote to myself, and I found one from back around August, I think, where I had made a note to write about Shaggy being the gamekeeper from RE in one of my other stories (that dog food thing inspired me) and I never used it, so I used it in here. Seemed appropriate.
I'm not sure where the next chapter will go, but I can definitely say, it will be really odd.
That's it for this chapter! I've got to run, but I'll be back soon, so leave me a review and let me know what you think!