"Why'd you leave? Where did you go? These times are great, but now there's none to show," Taylor Swift mumbled, hurriedly scribling lyrics onto a note pad.
"Yo! Watchoo got there, pretty lady?" an obnoxious voice called.
Taylor squeaked, backing into the corner of Weenie Hut Junior's.
"Don't hurt me!" Taylor cried.
"Nah, you ain't my type," the voice said.
"But I wouldn't mind having a friend in all this."
The figure was silhoutted against the eerie light filtering in through the windows. A retro ray gun sat in one hand, while his other arm held a hidden blade gauntlet, worn by members of the Assassin's Creed.
"What's your name?" Taylor asked, setting down her pencil.
"I have a lot of names. Most of them I'm not comfortable saying out loud. Just call me Slim..."
Slim Shady sat down next to Taylor, peering at her notebook.
"Are you writing songs about %^$&ing Darth Maul?"
"It's for my new album..."
A wicked cackle rang out in the air.
"Awwwooooo! Dahahahaahaa! Leedle leedle leedle lee!"
"The hell?" Slim Shady asked, peering out the window.
A massive pirate ship glided in the sky above, glowing a spooky shade of green.
"Attack, my children! Ahahahaha!" the voice of the Flying Dutchman shouted.
Outside, the sand rustled. Boney fins and skulls breached the dirt, pulling themselves from the land of the dead.
"We need to fend them off!" Slim shouted, rushing to the door.
"Shouldn't we try to be quie..."
Shady opened fire, green bursts erupting from his gun and shattering the skeletal bodies of the undead.
"Hmmm... This would make a great song," Taylor said with a smile.
"Would you shut up and help?" Slim Shady shouted.
Taylor grabbed a sniper rifle from behind a door, and positioned herself behind Slim.
"Seriously?" he asked.
"You learn a thing or two about guns when you've had 400 boyfriends," Taylor said, headshotting 5 undead fish.
"Yeesh. And I thought I had a problem settlin' down," Slim said.
"Hey!" Taylor said, slapping Slim in the head.
"OH! YOU DID NOT!"
"What?" Taylor asked.
"CHICKA CHICKA!" Slim yelled, grabbing Taylor and throwing her into the horde.
"AAAAAGH!" she screamed.
"Hah! Gaaaaayyyy!"
"Stupid girl," Slim growled, his furious face illuminated by the green glow of his weapon.