Rating: M-ish? (language)
Genre: Humor/Fluff
Pairing: Seth and Leah
Word-count: 506
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Prompt: "You have no clue what you're doing, do you?" + an adorable photo of a hot guy holding a baby. Some additional inspiration came from the Bellagio fountain in Las Vegas, which you can find videos of on youtube.
A/N: Shout our to jarms for letting me play with her drabble toys. This was inspired by her drabble "Ready Made," which you can find on Tricky Raven.
"You have no clue what you're doing, do you?"
Ignoring the goading words of his sister, Seth stared down his nemeses, nose scrunched and brow furrowed in concentration. Goddammit, he could do this. Wasn't he a wolf? A warrior? He killed vampires, for fuck's sake.
There was no way three babies and a piece of white plastic with sticky tabs were getting the best of him.
Under Leah's watchful eye, he unfastened each diaper with methodical precision, approaching the task like a factory worker on an assembly line. In no time at all, his cooing nephews were naked as—well, newborns, happily squirming on the changing table. He flashed a self-satisfied grin.
"Be careful, baby bro—"
"Shit!"
As if on cue, a Bellagio fountain of urine sprayed the air, raining onto Seth and puddling on the table.
"Dammit, Leah, why didn't you warn me?"
She could hardly speak through her cackles. "Diaper Changing 101. Not my fault you're an idiot." Still grinning, she reclined on the sofa and popped a grape in her mouth.
Seth reached for a towel and wiped his face, lip curled in a sour frown. "Why am I helping you, again?"
"Because you love me and your nephews? And because the doctor told me to take it easy. And because, for whatever reason, you're the only one in the pack Embry trusts." She pursed her lips. "Which doesn't say much about the pack, now that I think about it."
Seth tossed his balled-up towel at her.
"Hey! I may not be physically capable of kicking your ass at the moment, but that doesn't mean I won't issue a rain check."
Muttering to himself, Seth grabbed a handful of wipes and returned to his assembly line, lifting each baby one by one to wipe tiny bottoms clean and lay fresh diapers underneath.
"They're backwards, Seffie-poo."
"What?"
"The diapers. You've. Got. Them. Backwards." She took a sip of lemonade.
With a heaving sigh, he yanked each offending cloth from underneath its owner, the sudden movement resulting in twisted, reddened faces and a deafening chorus of cries.
"Oh, God. Shhhhh … shhhhh, it's okay, guys." He looked at Leah with desperate eyes.
Shaking her head, she stood and ambled toward them, gesturing toward a recliner. "Have a seat."
Defeated, Seth nodded and slumped into the chair, watching her stroke each baby's head with a tender caress. "Mommy's here," she whispered, humming while she re-adjusted and fastened each diaper with experienced hands. Securing the railing, she scooped them up one at a time and brought them to her brother.
"Wha—"
"Rock them," she said. "It's soothing."
With a nervous nod, he tucked a baby under each arm and laid one against his chest, securing it with his hands. Slowly pushing his feet off the floor in a steady rhythm, Seth closed his eyes and exhaled. The quartet finally settled into sleep—the largest wolf's snores the loudest of them all.
"Works for big babies, too." Leah tousled his hair. "You'll make a fine dad one day, Uncle Seth."