Time to respond to reviews. Brace yourself for a ton of sentences beginning with 'I'm glad.'

sledie258: I really love Anne-MariaXJustin too. Also, while Gwen is extremely frustrated with Duncan, she certainly doesn't hate him (if she did, she wouldn't try to make their relationship work).

RedEyedWarrior: I had a feeling that you would like the Total Drama Returns episode. Yeah, there is tons of potential for drama with Zoke, but Cameron is a great mediator between them. The Shipping Sailors did very well in the last chapter (I didn't explicity state this, but Jo, Courtney, and Tyler got through the entire challenge without getting hit by a paintball.) I'm glad that Courtney saving Duncan shocked you. Also, Duncan may become friends with Courtney later, when he becomes less of a jerk, but at the moment he's too busy feuding with Gwen. And you can look forward to lots of Gwuncan drama in the next two episodes (or in the next four or five chapters or so). I'm glad that the alliance is entertaining you. Also my habit of saying 'I'm Glad' seems to have rubbed off on you. Lol. Enjoy this chapter

Potterpalgirl123: Yeah, Duncan manged to go one step forward by forgiving and apologizing to Courtney, only to take two steps back due to his growing intrest in Viktoriya. The conflict between Mike and Zoey is going to be interesting, and like the other feuding couple in this story there will be problems on both sides. Pablo and friends are gonna start their latest scheme in this chapter, so hopefully you will enjoy this update.

tdroti scott's bff: I'm not sure if Brick has feelings for Jo, but I have a feeling that Brick would feel bad for Tyler, since Jo is trying to manipulate Tyler in the same way she tried to manipulate Brick. Duncan and Gwen will have to 'go out for coffee' as long as they have problems with their relationship (so another few episodes). I love the fourth wall breaking in the last chapter too, since it was basically where most of the comedy came from. I'm glad you thought my last chapter was great! Be sure to enjoy this one!

NerdyBarista: Oh yes, Pablo has something nasty in store for Mike (Which is why I put some foreshadowing of Pablo taking an interest in Mike in chapters three & four), something that won't be fully revealed until much later in the story. Sierra managed to sum up Trent's character, but this is Sierra we're talking about; she knows the entire cast inside-out! Harold' camp was my favorite joke from the last chapter, and was blatantly borrowed from TV Tropes. I'm glad that Courtney standing up for Duncan surprised you too! I thought that it wouldn't have shocked people since she was willing to forgive Duncan back in chapter three, but I guess I was wrong...

I'm glad you liked my call-back to one of your favorite TDA moments (Incidentally, Top Dog is one of my overall favorite Total Drama Action episodes). Even though I try to load this story with tons of callbacks both explicit and subtle, that Anne Maria callback was one hundred percent unintentional; but hey, it works! I do believe that Justin and Anne-Maria have tons of potential chemistry; I'd love for them to hook up on the actual show, but I highly doubt that either of them will get much screentime in future seasons. I also felt that I had no choice but to break the fourth wall during that Bridgette moment; even though she got to participate in the challenge, the surfer girl didn't get a single line of dialogue last chapter. Considering that Bridgette is my favorite female contestant, I should really give her more to do in this story! XD Unfortunately, Gwen is becoming more like Courtney (and will continue to become more like her), so her relationship with Duncan is tragically on thin ice. Hopefully you will like this chapter; I didn't do too much with the challenge, but I made sure to throw in some moments inspired by Cheesebub's excellent fic.

Now, on to the main event:

Episode Four: Total Drama Returns, Part 1

"Last time on Total Drama Fan-Fiction Theater…" Chef narrates.

"We had an epic Western style paintball shoot-out, and there was more drama then ever!

The stress on the relationship between Duncan and Gwen increased when the delinquent started taking interest in Viktoriya. A simliar problem happend with Mike and Zoey when Manitoba Smith started flirting with Viktoriya. Seriously! That girl knows how to keep the drama coming!

But she's not the only one! Pablo managed start an aliance with Viktoriya and Jo! Their plan to make sure that the Fanon Fixers lose worked like a charm, thanks to Viktoriya's paintball skills and Pablo's sabatoge. Jo also started to develop feelings for Tyler when she tried to manipulate him!

Ultimately, Anne Maria was the first member of the Fanon Fixers to take a ride in the Lame-o-sine. Yeah, pretty much everybody saw that coming! But what they didn't see coming was that at the last minute, Justin started a relationship with Anne Maria!

There are only twenty-one contestants left! Will the alliance between Pablo, Jo, and Viktoriya be able to ensure that the Fanon Fixers lose again? Will Gwuncan and Zoke last? And will Bridgette actually get a line of dialouge in this chapter? Find out right here, right now on: Total. Drama. Fan-Fiction Theater!"

The 21 remaining contestants were surprised that DJ didn't make them breakfast this morning! Instead, there was a note in the kitchen that said:

Chef told me not to make breakfast for you, and instead give you supplies to make cereal for yourselves. Not quite sure why, but Chef said it had something to do with today's challenge. Hopefully you guys will still have a great morning!

-Devon Joseph

The remaining contestants then noticed a buffet that featured fifteen different types of cereal and 10 gallons of milk and two cartons of almond milk. Each contestant grabbed a bowl and made their way down the buffet. (Yay for unintentional rhyming!)

Bridgette (who got a bowl of organic granola) sat down across from Viktoriya (who got a bowl of Wheaties[1]). The surfer girl said "So, you and Pablo huh? How was your date last night?"

Viktoriya looked up and said "Huh? Oh that! Well…."

Flashback:

Last night at the Vietnamese restaurant, after Pablo told his alliance members who they should target next, he said "OK, now for another strategy I need to discuss with you; I need to make myself even more likable to protect myself from elimination. So I'm thinking about starting a relationship with someone. That way nobody will want to vote off poor Pablo and his girlfriend."

Jo smirked "Nice strategy kid. Who you gonna ask?"

"That's a good question." Pablo responded. "Most of the girls here are already dating; I know! You're not dating anybody Jo, so…"

"WHAT?!" Jo yelled. "No way!"

Pablo smirked. "Why? Do you have a crush on someone else?"

Jo looked really surprised. "Wha? How did you know?"

"I read the last chapter." Pablo said, once again proving how fragile the fourth wall is in this story. Pablo then continued. "So if you're off the menu Jo, then how about… Viktoriya?"

Viktoriya looked super surprised. "Why me?"

Pablo smirked. "Well for one, you are my type of woman; beautiful, smart, strong, with gorgeous blonde hair. Also, this provides major benefit to you Viktoriya. Right now, you're the most hated member on our team. But if you started dating poor little pathetic Pablo, then our teammates might think better of you."

Viktoriya sighed. "Pablo, you are a great ally for this show, and an excellent schemer, but you would make a terrible boyfriend. You're sneaky, conniving, and deceitful; I wouldn't be able to trust you."

Pablo's smirk faded away. "Well….we could always just pretend to date. That accomplishes the same strategic goal."

Viktoriya frowned. "I'll…..I'll think about it."

End Flashback

Viktoriya wasn't quite sure how to answer Bridgette's question. "Um, the date was fine, but I'm not sure if Pablo is my type of guy."

Duncan, who had grabbed some Coco Pebbles, sat down and chuckled. "HeHeHe. I told you that you could do so much better than that scrawny little wimp, sweethear-"

"Ahem. Duncan." Gwen said to her boyfriend.

Duncan then facepalmed. "Crap, I forgot."

Confessional:

Gwen: Last night I told Duncan that if he wanted to keep dating me, then he wouldn't be allowed to hang out with Viktoriya. (Gwen sighed) I know that's a bit extreme, but Duncan flat out told me last night that he was attracted to Viktoriya! (A few tears started flowing out of Gwen's eyes) I love Duncan so much; I just hope he still loves me….

*Static*

Duncan: Ugh, Gwen told me last night I can't even dine next to Viktoriya! Why? Because I think Viktoriya is hot? (Duncan pauses, and realizes what he had just said) Actually, that's a good reason, but still! I don't like being told what to do!

Duncan got up and sat next to Gwen, who ended up sitting across from Jerome and Cody. Both of them were eating BBQ Rib Munchies.

"There's a BBQ rib flavored cereal?" Gwen said, lampshading the bizarre cereal I made up off the top of my head. "That doesn't sound like it would taste good."

"You're right Gwen." Jerome told the Goth. "This cereal doesn't taste good; it tastes fantastic!"

Cody, who didn't even pour milk on his bowl, nodded his head in agreement. "You're so right Jerome! They taste exactly like BBQ-flavored chips!"

"Wow, that sounds so appetizing." Gwen said sarcastically.

Justin was eating a bowl of Frosted Mini-Wheats with almond milk. Next to him was Courtney, who had a bowl of Apple-Jacks. Justin had a dreamy look on his face. Courtney chuckled. "So...you and that Anne Maria girl; I never would have thought!"

Justin sighed in a positive manner. "Yeah! She's great! Last night, she texted me some beauty tips. It's like I finally found someone who understands me!"

Courtney smiled. "Well that's fantastic!"

Justin looked at the C.I.T. and said "So how about you? Is there someone here you are interested in?"

Courtney was staring at Cody, who was calling his BBQ Rib Munchies the King of Breakfast Cereals. She giggled, before answering Justin's question. "Huh? Oh, umm...I'm not really interested in dating right now."

Meanwhile, Cameron, Mike, and Zoey were all sitting together; with Cameron eating Multi-Grain Cheerios, Mike eating Frosted Flakes, and Zoey eating an organic knock-off of Coco-Puffs, made with real coca-beans. Cameron got up to use the restroom, but Zoey said "Wait Cam! Don't leave! I need you to keep Mike in check!"

Cameron frowned. "Zoey, I think you're getting paranoid. I doubt that Mike will suddenly lose his shirt or that a fedora will randomly fall right out of the sky…"

Meanwhile above the craft services tent, there was a plane that was falling out of the sky. "Dude!" Said one of the plane pilots, "We're falling right out of the sky! We gotta drop the load!" The pilot then pushed a button that dropped all the luggage out of the plane.[2] And for the sake of drama, one the suitcases opened as it was falling down, which caused a fedora to fall down through the craft services tent and land on Mike's head.

Manitoba Smith took over and pulled out a lasso from nowhere. He then lassoed Viktoriya and pulled her over to his table. "Fancy meeting you here Shelia!"

Cameron quickly took the fedora off of Manitoba's head, giving Mike control of his body. Mike quickly noticed that both Zoey and Viktoriya were glaring at him. Viktoriya broke out of the ropes and slapped Mike in the face, calling him a freak.

Cameron sighed. It looked like he would have to stay by Mike and Zoey for a while.

The last three people in line for breakfast were Pablo, Owen, and Jo. There were only two boxes of cereal and one gallon of milk left at this point. Pablo couldn't figure out if he wanted to try out Honey-Nut Cheerios, Golden Grahams, or Cookie Crisps. Owen was getting very impatient with the Brazilian boy. Jo smirked and yelled "Come on Pablo! We don't have all day! We want to experience the taste sensation of these boxes of super sweet breakfast cere-"

Jo's rant caused Owen to get even hungrier, exactly how Jo and Pablo planned. This led to Owen shoving Pablo out of the way, and swallowing the three boxes breakfast cereals whole. The boxes got lodged in Owen's throat, so the gassy giant quickly grabbed the gallon of milk and drank the entire thing to wash down the boxes. In fifteen seconds Owen had completely demolished the buffet.

Pablo's eyes started to tear up. "Owen...I wanted to try breakfast cereal for the first time! Now I won't get a balanced breakfast, just like I never do back at home.." Pablo then burst into crocodile tears. Every other contestant glared at Owen.

"Not cool!" Jerome told Owen. "Pablo needs a good breakfast more then anybody here!"

"Yeah!" Heather said in agreement. "And out of all the contestants, you're the one who doesn't need to eat that much food!"

Confessional:

Pablo: (Chuckles) Yeah, my alliance is now focusing on Owen. He's a very specific type of player: He's so nice and friendly that he doesn't make any enemies, which guarantees him a spot in the merge each season. And that's my strategy! I can't pull it off as successfully if everybody still loves Owen. But I'll make sure that by the end of the day, every contestant here will despise that gluttonous swine! (Pablo then laughs evilly)

Bridgette gave Pablo her bowl of Granola. "Here Pablo, you need this more than I." Pablo quickly gobbled up the remainder of the organic granola.

Jo sighed. The plan to sabotage Owen may have worked, but now she didn't have any breakfast! At least not until Tyler went up to her and said "Hey Jo. I was about to eat this bowl of Cheerios, but it looks like you need it more."

Jo looked really surprised. "Are you sure Tyler?"

Tyler nodded. "Athletes like us need to stick together and help one another! Besides, even without breakfast, I still have mad skillz!"

Jo smiled as she took the bowl away from Tyler. Meanwhile, Harold (Who was eating Captain Crunch) was sitting across from Heather (Who was eating the same Organic Granola that Bridgette got earlier). Harold then spoke up. "Did you know that the first manufactured cereal was called 'Granula' and was invented by James Caleb Jackson in the 19th century?"

Heather rolled her eyes a bit and said "No and I didn't want to know."

Harold frowned "I'm just trying to be friendly and share my numerous facts with you, Gosh!"

Heather sighed. Recently Harold had been trying to befriend her, and she found him slightly annoying. But at the same time, he was one of the only members of the Fanon Fixers who liked Heather; with her crush Jerome being the only other. She was thinking about starting an alliance with the two of them, but putting up with Harold might be a bit much for her.

All of a sudden, Chef walked into the tent. "I hope you enjoyed your cereal as much as Geoff does in Total Drama Returns, cause that's where we will be taking today's challenge from. Follow me outside."

The contestants noticed the slot machine was out there yet again. Noah couldn't help but lampshade "Wow, we are using that thing again? Helmet 798 must be running out of ideas."

"Nah, he still has tons of different challenges planned." Chef said, standing in for myself. "But this is a great way to randomly pair up contestants for today's challenge: The Gagvertisements! You see, chapters twenty-five through twenty-seven of Total Drama Returns feature a challenge where each contestant must make their own product and then shoot a commercial for it. Since the Shipping Sailors have less members, we will divide up the teams into three smaller groups to make things fair." Chef then went over to the giant slot machine.

Chef started with the Shipping Sailors. The slot machine paired up Cody & Courtney and Tyler & Jo. This meant that Justin would have to do the challenge by himself.

Chef then moved on to the Fanon Fixers. The slot machine decided to pair up Sierra and Trent. After that, it decided to make Owen, Noah, and Jerome a trio for the challenge. This meant that the last group consisted of Harold, Heather, and Leshawna.

Finally, Chef moved on to the Sue Crew. The slot machine paired up Bridgette and Gwen. After that, it decided that Mike, Cameron, and Duncan would work on the challenge as a trio. This meant that the last group consisted of Pablo, Viktoriya, and Zoey. This greatly pleased Pablo.

"All right, now that you got your groups, here are your instructions." Chef said. "You have until 5:00 P.M. to make a product and shoot a commercial for it." Chef gave each group a video-camera and a lap-top to do some film editing. "At 5:00 P.M. we will screen all of the commercials at the theater, to be judged by me, Scott, and Chris. Understand?" The remaining contestant understood. "All right, then get going!"

Tyler was pumped up! "All right, with all that exposition out of the way, we can start the challenge!" Tyler paused. "Wait, is Helmet 798 going to stop the chapter right here?"

Noah looked down below him. "Yup."

Tyler pouted. "Crap."

Author Notes:

[1] For those of you who don't know, the slogan of Wheaties is that 'It's the breakfast of champions.' Seemed like the perfect cereal for Viktoriya.

[2] This strange moment is a reference to the season three Spongebob Squarepants episode: Club Spongebob. And the whole concept of randomly inserting a Spongebob reference in a Total Drama story is an homage/in-joke to ForteKham617. He has written a number of funny Total Drama fics, and he often throws in lots of random references to other cartoons; particularly to Spongebob.

Since the last chapter had a big emphasis on Drama, Action, and Character development, I wanted to focus more on the laughs here. Also, deciding to make this episode the 'Total Drama Returns' challenge was a last minute decision. This was originally going to be a truth-or-dare challenge, but the commercial challenge from Returns more easily leads to the character interactions that need to happen. Thus, most of the breakfast scene was improvised, although I already planned out Gwen and Duncan's confessional about a chapter or two ago.

Anyways, I'm on a roll with updates, but this coming week is very busy on my behalf, so I probably won't update until next week at least.

Quick shout out to Nerdy Batista, who correctly predicted that the Pablo/Jo/Viktoriya alliance would target Owen! Seriously! She has a gift for predicting what will happen in my story, so if you don't want spoilers, stop reading her reviews. Lol, JK.

Next Time on Total Drama Fan-Fiction Theater: The Shipping Sailors start to live up to their name, when Cody & Courtney and Tyler & Jo work together for the challenge. Meanwhile, Harold tries to get Heather and Leshawna to stop arguing! Also, Zoey is not happy about working with Viktoriya, which pleases Pablo quite a bit. And finally, Jerome finally fulfills his destiny and makes his own BBQ sauce! Can Pablo's alliance take out Owen? Can Gwuncan or Zoke last? Can I stop breaking the fourth wall in this story? All of this, and more, in the next chapter!